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where silence starts to notice

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There are days when you can tell something is going to shift even before anything actually happens. Not because something loud or dramatic occurs, but because your mind starts paying attention to details it usually ignores. That was how I felt today. Not nervous exactly, not excited either, just aware in a way that made everything feel slightly sharper than usual. Even the air felt like it had weight. Even the silence felt like it was waiting for something to happen.

I tried to ignore it at first. I always do. I told myself it's just school, just another routine day, just another version of everything I've already survived before. But the problem with pretending is that sometimes your mind doesn't follow you. Sometimes it stays behind and keeps noticing things you don't want it to notice.

Luisa was already waiting for me when I arrived, leaning against the gate like she always does, looking like she's been there long enough to memorize every student who passes by. When she saw me, she straightened immediately and gave me that familiar look like she already knew what version of me she was getting today.

"Okay," she said as soon as I reached her, "rate your emotional stability from one to ten."

I blinked at her. "Anong klaseng tanong naman 'yan?"

She shrugged. "Important one."

I sighed. "Seven."

She squinted at me. "That's a lie. Try again."

I rolled my eyes slightly but couldn't stop the faint smile that formed anyway. "Fine. Five."

She nodded like that made more sense. "Better. Honest at least."

That's Luisa. She turns everything into something lighter even when it shouldn't be light. I don't know how she does it, but I'm always grateful she exists in the middle of everything that feels too heavy for me.

We walked inside together, and I tried to focus on her talking about something random, probably a classmate or something she found funny earlier, but my attention kept slipping away in between her words. It wasn't intentional. It just kept happening.

And then I felt it again.

That shift. The kind I'm starting to recognize now even if I don't want to.

I didn't look immediately this time. I waited for a second longer than usual, like I was testing myself. And when I finally turned my eyes slightly toward the corridor, I saw him.

Cassian Kael Montenegro.

Still the same. Still leaning like he belongs in places without needing permission. Still quiet in a way that doesn't feel empty, but controlled. He wasn't doing anything obvious, just standing there like he always does, but somehow it still felt like he was aware of everything around him without trying.

I looked away almost immediately, but not as fast as before. That small difference bothered me more than I want to admit. Luisa noticed my pause anyway.

"Don't," she said quietly.

I frowned slightly. "Don't what?"

"Don't start overthinking again," she said casually, like she was talking about the weather.

"I'm not overthinking."

She gave me a look. "Sera, you literally just paused mid-walk."

I didn't respond because she was right and I didn't feel like admitting it.

We continued walking, but something felt slightly different today. Not because he did anything new, but because I did. I noticed him faster. More clearly. Like my mind is starting to recognize him without needing permission first.

That thought alone made me uncomfortable.

Classes passed like normal, but I wasn't fully present in any of them. I kept catching myself spacing out, staring at nothing, replaying small moments I didn't think mattered but somehow did. Luisa tried to pull me back into conversation during break, but even she noticed I was quieter than usual.

"Okay," she said while unwrapping her snack, "spill."

"Spill what?"

"You've been weird since earlier."

"I'm not weird."

She raised an eyebrow. "Sera, you literally forgot I was talking to you twice."

I sighed. "I'm just tired."

She leaned closer slightly. "Or you're thinking about him again."

That made me stop, not dramatically. Just a small pause.

But she noticed. I didn't answer immediately, and that silence was enough for her.

"Oh my God," she muttered. "You are."

"I'm not," I said quickly. But it sounded weaker than I wanted.

Luisa groaned softly. "Okay, listen. If this is about Cal, just-don't make it bigger in your head than it is."

"I'm not making anything bigger."

She stared at me for a second, then sighed like she gave up arguing.

"Fine. Whatever helps you sleep at night." That was the end of it. Or at least it should've been.

But later that day, something happened that didn't feel like coincidence. I was sitting in class, not fully paying attention, when I felt something slide under my desk again. My first reaction wasn't surprise anymore, just quiet awareness. Like my brain already expected it before my eyes confirmed it.

A folded paper. Again.

I didn't open it immediately. I just stared at it for a second, like I was waiting for it to disappear on its own.

It didn't. Slowly, I unfolded it.

Same handwriting. Same simplicity. Same lack of explanation.

"You think too much for someone who doesn't say anything."

I read it once.

And something about it didn't feel like a random note anymore. It felt like someone had been watching patterns instead of moments. Like they weren't just seeing me, but understanding something about me I never said out loud.

My fingers tightened slightly around the paper without me realizing it. This time, I didn't look around immediately.

I waited. And when I finally did, my eyes moved across the room carefully.

Normal faces. Normal movement. Normal noise. But then I noticed something near the far end of the room.

Cassian Kael Montenegro wasn't looking at me. Not directly. But he wasn't looking away either.

He was just there. Existing in the same space like nothing had changed. Like he didn't just send something that made my thoughts feel louder than before.

The bell rang before I could think further, and the class started moving again like nothing happened. I stayed seated for a moment longer than everyone else, holding the paper in my hand without fully processing what I was supposed to feel about it.

Luisa appeared beside me as people started leaving. "You're quiet again," she said.

"I'm always quiet."

"Not like this."

I stood up slowly. "I'm fine."

She sighed like she didn't believe me anymore but wasn't going to force it out of me either.

We walked out together like usual, but my mind didn't fully stay with her conversation anymore. It kept going back to the note. Not because it was scary, not because it was romantic, but because it felt like something was shifting without permission.

At the gate, Luisa suddenly stopped walking.

"Okay," she said, turning to me, "serious question."

I looked at her. "What now?"

"If this keeps happening," she gestured slightly like she meant everything, "you're going to tell me, right?"

I hesitated not because I didn't want to answer. But because I didn't know what "this" even is yet.

"...yeah," I said finally.

She studied me for a second, then nodded like she was accepting it for now.

"Good," she said. "Because I don't trust silence when it starts getting attention from other people."

That made me pause slightly but I didn't ask what she meant. Because I already had too many questions I didn't want answers for yet. And as we walked away from school, I couldn't stop thinking about one thing.

The silence I've always lived with... doesn't feel like it belongs only to me anymore.