Trinity

"You want something from Rally's?"

I looked over at him. He was still focusing on the road. He was in the same sexy stance that he was before. I felt my insides getting tingly once again. I tried to hide my smile, but I couldn't do that very well.

"Checkers?"

"Potato, tomato...whatever that saying y'all got down here. You want something or not, Shawty?"

I laughed, "Not really, but if you get something that's cool."

He didn't respond. He turned up the radio and continued to blast Toosii again. I pulled out my phone to check Instagram.

fckNya9: Fuck bathroom pics

I commented, bestieee 🥵. Even though I had already seen the post, and helped her make it, I felt that it was important for me to support her.

Kim_Upshaw410: This how y'all eyeing my bag 🤷🏾‍♀️🤑

I laughed. She never posted serious pictures, considering how beautiful she was. Kim was the product of black excellence. She could be the poster child of black excellence.

The car came to a halt at checkers drive thru. He rolled down his window, and turned the radio down some.

"Welcome to Checkers, what can I get you today?"

"Lemme get a Baconzilla with a medium fry and a coke to drink."

"Is that all sir?"

He looked over at me, "you sure you don't want nothing?"

"I'm fine."

He turned back around to the window. I reached for the paper he had on the dashboard. I was bored, and needed something to do.

As we went through the drive thru, he typed some things on his phone. When Future's Please Tell Me flooded the speaker, he rapped along.

His voice was soothing. It had this certain tang to it, that I wanted to listen to all the time. I started to think about what it would sound like when he first woke up. The raspiness would make it-

"You have a boyfriend,"I thought to myself.

We were out of the drive thru within seconds. He placed the bag of food in the cup holder. As we drove he stuck his hand in there to grab a few fries.

The aroma of the fries made my stomach growl. He looked over at me with a mean look.

"I asked yo ass if you was hungry."

"Im sorry! I haven't ate all day, but I thought I could wa-"

"Grab that Baconzilla, shawty. I got it for you anyways. I knew you was gon holla you hungry as soon as I started eating."

My heart fluttered in my chest. A smile spread across my face as I grabbed the burger out of the bag. It smelled like perfection, and nonetheless tasted like it.

I dug my teeth into the burger and tasted the juiciness of the meat. I hadn't eaten all day, and this was heaven to me.

My phone buzzed in my lap. I held the burger in my mouth and grabbed my phone.

1 new message from Nya
Received at 11:47 PM

I'm going hone with Roy

1 new message from Nya
Received at 11:48 PM

You can say at my house but I'm bot there

1 new message from Nya
Received at 11:48 PM

Mama and Mommy not hone tho so but they a key under the dooe

1 new message from Nya
Received at 11:48

Lobe you botch

"Fuck,"I mumbled.

I couldn't blame Nya for getting drunk and going home with Royale. She didn't expect me to stay at her house anyways. I told her as soon as we got to the party.

I sent Kim a text, but she didn't respond. She was probably still at the party.

"You a'ight over there? That burger got you moaning and shit."

"No,"I sighed. "Nya isn't going home tonight, and I don't want to stay in her house by myself. I guess you can just take me home, and I'll sneak in."

"You can stay with me tonight."

I looked at him. He wasn't joking. He got into the turning lane that was going away from my house.

"Um, I don't think that's ap-"

"I'll sleep on the floor. You can sleep in my bed. My Pops sleep on the couch, so I can't sleep there."

"I have a boyf-"

"I'll take you home,"He said annoyed.

He put on his blinker to change lanes. The light changed though, and he was the first to go. The cars blew their horns at us.

"Just take me to your house. It's too hard to get out of here,"I said.

"Nah, you wanna go home. Them mothafuckas can wait."

"Just take me to your house! Okay!"I shouted annoyed.

He looked at me, chuckled, and turned the car off.

"What the fuck are you doing?"I asked. "What are you doing?"

"Shawty, you got a lot of attitude. I can tell you right now. If I take you to my house, and let you sleep in my bed, you gon have to lose that shit. I'm trying to be nice. I don't want your stuck up ass, and if I did I promise you we'd be in that backseat right now. You need to lose the attitude, Shawty, or you can walk home."

I crossed my arms, still angry. He started the car, and stuck his middle finger out of the window. The line of cars behind us was extremely long.

I picked up my burger and continued to eat it. It was still hitting every spot, and as mad as I was I didn't want to let it go.

The rest of the car ride was silent. His music played softly in the speakers. He didn't rap along though. He just continued to stare at the road.

Within minutes we were pulling into his driveway. He grabbed all of the things out of his car, and opened the doors.

"C'mon,"He mumbled.

I got out of the car and followed him into the house. He led me to the back door. The backyard was dark, not much there.

"We have to go in the back cause pops on the couch sleep. I don't want to wake up Pops."

He opened the door and pointed towards the floor. He slipped off his shoes and motioned for me to do the same. I kicked off my sandals.

He didn't turn on any lights. He just grabbed my hand and led me down the hall. I could tell what room was his. His smell lingered in the hallway

He pushed open the door and allowed me in. The room was clean, to much surprise. His clothes were neatly folded on top of the dresser, and nothing was on the floor. The only thing that stuck out was the amount of water bottles on the nightstand. He had enough plastic to pollute the nearest lake.

"Bathroom is through those doors right there. I don't think Jada's clothes would fit you."

"Jada?"I asked.

"Uh yeah, my younger sister. I could go to her, ummm her room and get some."

"It's alright. Do you have a shirt I could borrow?"

"Yeah,"He responded.

He reached into the drawer and pulled out a old-worn out t-shirt. I examined how it was nearly my size. We were practically the same size. I was short and skinny. He was tall and even skinnier.

He pointed to the door I was supposed to go too. I walked over to the door and opened it.

The bathroom was nice. It was nothing special to me. It looked like he shared it with Amir, but I didn't want to open the other door.

I quickly got in the shower. I ended up washing my body with his body wash. With so many brothers, this wasn't something I was foreign too. Men's body washes always smell great anyways.

Once I was finished, I got out and put on the t-shirt he gave me. I smiled as I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked great.

"You have a boyfriend," I mumbled to myself.

As I walked out of the bathroom, I noticed him standing shirtless in the corner. He had his back turned to me, but I could still see him in the mirror on his door.

"That was quick,"He said. "Usually y'all be in there for hours."

"We have school tomorrow,"I responded. "Can you take me to school tomorrow, or should I get Nya to pick me up?"

"I'll take you. Give me your clothes so I can wash them."

"Are you trying to say I smell bad?"I joked.

He chuckled, "Your clothes smelled like weed and alcohol, Shawty. That smell not too great."

I rolled my eyes and handed him the dress I had on. He was right, it did smell like weed and alcohol. Nya was smoking right beside me, and I had a drink or two. Not to mention the fact that I'm extremely clumsy and accidentally spilt my drink on myself.

He walked into the bathroom and shut the door. I heard his music playing once again. I could tell he loved lowkey rap. He didn't listen to a lot of main streamed artist, and I liked that.

My phone notified me that it was on 10%. I cursed myself because I left my bag in Eli's car. I had everything I needed in it, but now I have nothing but just my phone.

I looked around his room for a charger. Everything was so neatly placed and put together, I didn't want to mess it up. I searched through his drawers, hoping to find something. I didn't find anything there but magazines of naked women and a journal.

As I went to the other side of the room to look at his nightstand, I noticed a cord sticking out from under his bed. I bent down to retrieve it, but I couldn't reach it. My arms weren't long enough.

"What the fuck you in here doing?"He asked.

I quickly tried to stand up, but I ended up stumbling over my own feet. A smile grew on his face as he looked at me struggle.

"I was looking for a charger, bu-"

He walked over to his dresser and pulled out a charger. It was the exact place I had looked, but I didn't see it there.

"I swear I looked there,"I said with a laugh.

"You were probably distracted by these,"He said as he held up the magazines. "Much better than shitty ass porn, if you ask me."

I didn't respond. I didn't know how to respond. I took the charge from his hands and plugged it into the wall by his bed. I placed it on the nightstand and sat on the bed, admiring his room.

"I'm going to go start the washing machine and grab something from the kitchen. You want anything, Shawty?"He asked.

I shook my head, "I think I'm going to bed."

He walked out of the room and closed the door. He didn't turn off the light though. I cringed as I had to get up again.

I walked towards the door, to turn off the light, but it didn't work. Right next to the door was another door, I was assuming was his closet. I opened it to make sure I hadn't disturbed anything.

To my surprise, there was no clothes in his closet. It was hardly anything a closet should be. Instead, it was recording equipment. He had a microphone, computer, and other tech savvy technology I didn't know about.

My curiosity got the best of me. I touched the keypad to the computer, and it lit up. It was password protected though. There was a journal on the side of his desk.

Inside the journal were the words, Normal in bold letters. He had different notes, links, and drawings in there.

I started to connect many dots. He sent me the link yesterday. He was the one who directed me to his podcast about Normal things. It made a lot of sense now. His brother is pansexual, and he even spoke about how his parents hated him. I mentally slapped myself for not putting the pieces together before.

I heard his footsteps in the hallway. I quickly closed the journal, put it back where it belonged, got out of the closet, shut the door, and jumped into the bed. I didn't want him to know I was snooping around in his stuff.

The door opened, and he walked in. His hair was messy, and he didn't have a shirt on. He had on sweatpants that displayed more than they needed too.

"You a'ight, Shawty?"He asked. "I thought you'd be sleep by now."

"Just saying my prayers!"I lied.

"How are you going to lie on God?"I thought.

He didn't respond. He walked towards the bathroom once again. I turned over on my side and tried to think about falling asleep.

I heard him come back into the room. I closed my eyes and tried to make it seem like I was sleeping.

He tiptoed to the nightstand that was in front of me. Inside of the drawers were medication that he was reaching for.

"Blood thinners,"He said softly. "My blood pressure fucked up."

I didn't respond. I was to busy eyeing what was in his sweatpants. It was sitting right in front of me, in plain sight, practically begging for me to touch it.

I reached out and grabbed his thigh. For a second, he stayed there, but then he pulled away as fast as he could.

"Go to sleep, Shawty."

"But hear me out, okay?"

"You tipsy right now,"He responded.

He walked to the other side of the bed, and made his self cozy on the floor.

"Eli...he did cheat on me,"I whispered.

"I know,"He said back. "I'm not gonna be yo revenge though."

"Fuck it. Just do it Trinity,"My mind said to myself.

Without questioning it, I got off of the bed and straddled him on the floor. He didn't try to push me off of him. He just looked away, trying to contemplate if this is what he wanted or not.

I tried to bring his face to mine, so I could kiss him, but he didn't budge. To my surprise, I was being lifted into the air, and placed on the bed.

A smile grew on my face as I realized he was taking control. That smile faded quickly as I realized what he was really doing.

He sat me on the bed and walked away, into the bathroom.

Tears started to form in my eyes as I thought about how he didn't want me. Many guys didn't. They thought I was stuck up, or too smart. I've only ever been with Eli, and through many attempts to be with other guys I never succeeded.

I turned the opposite way and stared at the wall, trying to fall asleep.

"Fuck Trinity,"I heard him say. "I really want to respect you, because you deserve respect..."

I didn't respond. I just kept looking the other way. I was humiliated, embarrassed.

"But I want to fuck that attitude out of you so bad, Shawty."

I smiled to myself once I knew how I could get what I wanted.

"Fuck you,"I responded. "Other guys would jump at the opportunity to have sex with me, and you just casually tell me no, so fuck you."

"What you say?"He asked with a raised tone.

I turned around so I was facing him. I tried my best to hide my smile, and I think I was doing pretty well at it.

"I said fuck you Warren,"I responded. "Would you like me to say it in Spanish, or can you not understand that either?"

His hand reached around and wrapped around my throat. He pushed my back on the bed, and was now on top of me.

"Watch yo'self,"He whispered in my ear.

I smirked at how aggressive he was being. I led my hands to the string of his sweatpants but he pushed them away.

He took his hand off of my neck, and pulled at the Nike Pro's I had on under the t-shirt. His touch was euphoric, making me feel like I was worth something.

"Damn,"He said as he felt me through my panties. "You wet as fuck, Shawty."

My body tingled at the words Shawty. Such a simple word had so much control over me.

He placed two fingers inside of me, pumping really slow in and out.

"Warren,"I whined, wanting the real thing.

"Shut the fuck up,"He demanded.

He took his thumb and ran it over my clít, making me go insane. I moaned loudly. He quickly took his other hand and placed it over my mouth,

He suddenly stopped, just before I was going to climax.

"Wha-"

"Take all that shit off,"He told me.

I quickly pulled the t-shirt over my head off, unsnapped my bra, and pulled off my panties. He did the same, stripping from head to toe. His dick was huge, much bigger than Eli's.

"You gon give me head?"He asked as he reached for a condom.

"I've never done that before,"I said. "But I mean how hard can it be?"

"Nah, you don't got to."

I smiled and reached for his dick. Eli never wanted head. He said he didn't find it amusing. I never really cared, until recently.

I put my lips around the tip, swirling my tongue like I've seen the girl do on the videos.

He grabbed the back of my head and pushed himself farther into me. Naturally my gag reflex kicked in.

He kept trying to put me farther, but I wouldn't let him.

"Stop, stop,"He said pushing me back some.

"I'm sorry. I don't kn-"

"Nah, it's cool. Don't apologize."

I looked at his dick and noticed how flaccid it was.

"You're not even hard,"I said. "You're not attracted to me...are you?"

"Shawty, it's not like that,"He said. "Sex is intimate to me, and I thought I could do this, but Ion think I can."

"You're not attracted to me?"I said trying to fight back tears.

He rested his hand on my cheek, "No, never that. I don't just have sex with girls. I gotta be emotionally attracted to you, and I barely know you Trinity. You're beautiful, but I can't do this right now."

I turned away to put my clothes back on. I looked dumb standing in front of him naked, and not being able to do anything for him.

"We don't have to stop,"He reassured me. "Shawty look, if you want he-"

"I'm really tired...Um, I think I'm gonna get some uh sleep,"I said softly.

"Trinity, please don't act like that,"He said trying to make me feel better.

I pulled the shirt over my head and turned over on my side. He sat on the bed for awhile, but didn't say anything.

"Shawty..."

"Goodnight Warren,"I managed to say through my tears.

He sighed loudly and got off the bed. The lights went off, and I heard him fumble around on the floor. Finally everything was still.

Another example on why I wasn't perfect. The only person who found interest in me was Eli, but even he couldn't stay, he had to go to other girls to find something I couldn't provide.

That's all I ever wanted to be was perfect.