It was nearly noon when Freddie awoke. He pushed himself up, barely able to remember much after Brian had come to get him. Mainly he could just see Brian heading over and barely waking up for a second while he treated some of his wounds. Brian practically had to drag him into their room, his body more exhausted than usual and excruciatingly sore once more. Freddie shivered again, still unable to feel any sort of warmth even with the heavy comforter of his bed draped over his body. He was clad in another oversized outfit and the gashes across his body were already starting to heal, the pestle that Brian usually used for treating them still sitting atop his nightstand.

"How you doing?" Brian asked from across the room, a book stretched out across his lap along with a large map decorated with various constellations.

"Tired." He answered, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes as he brought his hand up to the opposing arm, feeling the still swollen cuts along his arm from underneath the sleeve.

"I got everything treated. You passed out almost as soon as I came down there. I just tossed on something to keep you warm since, well, that outfit didn't really survive..."

Shame tightened his stomach even more so, eliminating any sort of possibly hunger he might've felt for those few seconds after waking. He avoided Brian's concerned gaze, unable to face him right now and laid back down on the bed, turning onto his side and staring at the wall. Within a few seconds, the rustling of papers from Brian's side of the room returned and he kept silent.

Flashes of last night began shooting into his mind, his body tensing and trembling every time they encroached on his thoughts. The beast slamming its body against the windows to try and smash it open, raking its claws against the glass to try and weaken it. Tearing the rug apart and crashing against the shield around the fireplace numerous times. Howls of pure rage and hunger continually echoed off the wall, its jaws soon latching down onto itself or bringing its claws up to draw more blood, gladly lapping up every drop that spilled out of its wounds.

It was so familiar, yet so new. Freddie was already cursing himself, trying to get his mind to shut up for a few moments so that he could try and get more sleep after having none the previous night. But how could he? Never once could he stop them, so why would he be able to do so now? He just wanted them to stop forever, but he'd made his bed, now he had to lie in it.

As soon as the wolf's orange gaze shot into his mind, his eyes flew back open. His stomach churned inside of him, nausea staring to fill him up once again as he tried to refocus his eyes onto the now spinning room around him.

"Freddie, you sure you're okay?" Brian asked again, Freddie only barely registering his lover's words and automatically nodding.

"You look like you're gonna be sick. I'll get a bucket."

He barely heard him walk around the room, his mind losing its fight against those memories he had tried so hard to lock up and forget, the battle ending quickly as they went free. The silvery glow of the moon lighting up the grounds as he cast the spell onto the grass for Brian to find him for them to spend their anniversary together while he thought about whether or not he should enchant the fire to be a delicate shade of purple instead of the usual warm reds and oranges. All those little animal noises that sounded from the woods that he couldn't have cared less about, even the loud snarls he thought belonged to a bear or some other random creature that lived inside the forest.

That barbaric growl that came from his side echoed through his mind as he was suddenly thirteen again. He looked behind him, seeing that wild orange light glow from the beast's eyes as it reared up onto its hind legs and let out its deafening howl. Shock held him in place for those few seconds that might've stopped all of this. He couldn't move until the beast began moving.

One second. That's all it had taken for it to be upon him. He leapt back, narrowly missing its snapping mouth. Yet he didn't miss its slashing claws, feeling them dig into his leg and pull him down, the other set digging into his side. He reached out for his wand that was barely a few centimeters away, feverishly trying to think of something to get it off of him. Pain seared through his leg as its teeth sunk into his soft flesh, nearly reaching down to the bone. A blood-curdling cry of pain sprang from his mouth, tears immediately blinding his vision as the claws on his side raked down to his hip, the beast adding another attack on his side with the same paw.

He tried his best to free himself, focusing on trying to grab his wand to blast it off of him or at least shield himself from being hurt any further. Hot blood began gushing out of the cuts it already created, those menacing growls continuing to reverberate out of its muzzle. He tore at the grass, trying his damnedest to break free while the claws that were buried in his leg soon began grabbing at his back.

His hand finally came in tact with his wand. "Protego!" He tried, the shot disappearing in the distance.

He turned around to face the beast that was behind him, his eyes meeting that vicious orange stare that showed nothing but bloodlust. Its grey fur was marred with dark blood across its snout and shoulders, not a single ounce of morality or humanity inside of its untamed gaze.

"Pro-protego!" He tried once more, the scene slowly starting to go hazy around him as his breathing hastened, the thudding of footsteps and someone shouting his name slowly coming through to him.

"...die!? Freddie!?"

Instantly he was back in his bedroom, a small bucket at the edge of his bed and Brian's panicked eyes looking down at him from next to his bed. Tears were still pouring out of the corners of his eyes and falling across his face onto the sheets beneath him. It wasn't for a few more seconds did he realize he was clutching the scar along his left leg and was shaking violently. He fell over the side of his bed, grabbing the bucket Brian had brought in and let out the little bit of what he had in his stomach into it, soon feeling Brian's hand on the back of his head as he held back his hair.

Brian began softly stroking his back as he finished vomiting inside of the small bucket, wiping away the small drivel on the corner of his mouth.

"I'm sorry..." He muttered through his shaky sobbing. "I wanted to be calm this morning a-and...I'm sorry..."

He let out a long moan of pain as he continued shaking in his seat. Brian didn't press any further. Instead he moved closer, putting his hand over his shoulder and slowly running it along his arm. His ugly sobs filled their room, every image still pressed right up against the front of his mind and bringing back every emotion he had felt during the entire experience. Rage, fear, sadness, all of it. But the fear was the most prominent in his mind at the moment. Coming in contact with that beast again completely petrified him. Hell just seeing another one terrified him to no end.

"I'm sorry..." He repeated in a slightly louder tone. "I-I should've listened a-and I didn't a-and it's all my bloody fault that we're stuck here and n-not home a-and-"

"Freddie, Freddie it's alright." Brian comforted in that stable tone, not once removing his hand from his arm. "There's no need to be sorry." He paused, looking down at the comforter before continuing. "It's the past. We...We can't focus on that right now."

'No it's not alright!" He spat venomously. "Look what we have to do..." He said in a solemn voice. "We're lying to everyone around us. Roger, John, our parents."

"Freddie it's not your fault." Brian tried, Freddie fighting back another outburst as he returned to his sobbing. Brian didn't say another word either, only continuing to stroke his arm as he brought his hand up to his leg. In an instant, Freddie fell over onto Brian's lap as he now tried to slow his crying and get control over himself.

"It's okay. It's okay." Brian told him in a gentle voice. "It's hard having to do all of this. But we're making it work. No one's found out, have they?"

He shook his head against his chest, letting out a shaky exhale that was muffled in Brian's clothes.

"See. It's okay. Breathe."

Freddie listened to what Brian was telling him even with that weight present upon his chest. That sick feeling kept its tight grip around him, forcing him to stay in place and stay quiet. All the images were still rampaging through his mind, making his stomach tense and miniscule and making it nearly impossible to speak anything even remotely coherent.

It was so easy...We could've had a normal school experience and you went and ruined it. He berated, his eye twitching as his mind continued to bombard him with everything he knew was true. It's your fault. He's just telling you what you want to hear so you can get off again and fuck around with your lives again. Get over yourself you prat. He's gonna leave you and John and Roger'll follow. You deserve it anyway. You're just the burden on their lives.

He looked up at Brian for a second, seeing that hurtful confusion and desperation in his eyes as he tried his best to soothe him. God knows he doesn't deserve any of this...A single memory began to resurface, the present sadness growing heavier and heavier at the old scene of Brian and him hanging out with Roger and John back in their third year, the sight of all of them smiling without a care in the world making tears return to his already bloodshot eyes.

"I miss when we were younger Bri, back when nights were just us screwing around and not us having to worry about me...biting you or hurting anyone..." Freddie admitted in a sad voice, guilt tightening its metal fist around his weak body.

"I miss it too but we still have many other nights for us to hang out and be together."

"It's not the same. You know it's not. No matter what we do it's not going to change." Unless someone actually shoots me dead.

"You don't know that. Good wizards are always out there trying to cure this every day. Someday they'll find something for you."

It'll happen the day I die. That's when it'll happen. "I hate lying to them. I wanted to be home this Christmas. Not hanging back here again."

"If you ever want to tell them, I'll be there with you. They're not going to shun you or-"

"It's not just that Bri...What would everyone else think about them? My mother might lose her job because she's got...got a monster for a son. And you won't be able to do anything either o-or your family because you've ties to someone like me. You know Roger won't dare to talk to you again because you've been with me and lord knows what John would do..."

The room fell silent, Freddie just curling up next to Brian's body. Brian never let go for the next half hour, each of them silently sitting there as he tried his best to calm himself back down after slipping back into a flashback. It's what you get for trying to act brave. You're a coward and weak. Don't think this'll ever get easier. It's what you bloody deserve. Every tremble brought a soft run of Brian's hand along his arm, his eyes thankfully never growing blurry with tears again during that entire time. His thoughts remained persistent, yet none ever slipped out into the open. He's doing this to shut you up. He just doesn't want to hear you bitch anymore about your pathetic problems. You're weak. No one would care for you if they knew what you are. You deserve this and you know it.

...

A thin layer of snow had blanketed the old, now frozen, layer beneath it from a few days ago. Grey clouds covered the sky, the metallic tang of incoming snow woven through the air as Freddie wandered around the grounds by himself. He was coming up to the courtyard where a few students were in, talking to each other or playing around with the snow. Brian had gone to the Owlery to send off a parcel to their parents, Freddie feeling glad that he had gotten something at Hogsmede for his parents, even though it was just a few sweets. He wasn't sure what Brian had gotten, but he would make sure to find out later on when he saw him again.

He headed into the courtyard, looking around at the other students playing around, especially the small group of first years. Just two Gryffindors, a Slytherin, and a Hufflepuff playing together, to his surprise, like they had been friends for years. The dark-skinned girl giggled playfully as she was knocked over into the snow by the Hufflepuff, the two Gryffindors joining in the laughter. Freddie grinned too, admiring the innocence of those first years who were enjoying their first Hogwarts' winter.

"Freddie! Hey!"

He turned around at the call of his name, seeing John rush towards him, a few other students watching as he dashed off. Concern was lurking under his grey gaze, but happiness was still lined across his expression.

"I forgot you were here actually. Where were you this morning to see Roger off?"

"J-just felt ill...You saw me a few days ago. Brian stayed up there to make sure I didn't get sick all over the bed."

John's own concern darkened his eyes even more so as he nodded. "Well you look a bit better now." He said.

"Yeah, well, just needed some rest. Feeling much better after last night."

Again, John only nodded. Remembrance lit up his eyes as he reached into his pocket, unfolding a sheet of paper. "I was wondering if you'd help me do some more reviewing. It's been a while since I've done any and, well...yeah."

"Oh come off it. I doubt you'll need much. You're one of the brightest in your year."

"Well yeah but I just don't wanna fall behind in herbology. It's not exactly my strong suit."

"C'mon then. Library's got to be dead right now."

Without another word, they headed out of the courtyard. John stayed at his side, fiddling around with his shirt while they walked along the silent corridor.

"Why're you two staying back again? You did the same thing last year and the year before." John commented, still avoiding any eye-contact with him.

"Ah...Well, we've a lot going on with our classes. I mean, we've N.E.W.Ts this year and last year was O.W.Ls so we needed to study for those. Fourth year was the s-same thing. Just a...bunch of studying. You know how Ravenclaws are!" He responded, pulling a weak smile that didn't gain one back from John.

"I mean...Has something come up at home? If that's the case, you can tell me if you want." He gave a painful laugh and continued to stare at the ground. "Has someone passed?"

I still couldn't go home even for that. "No...Everything's fine at home. Just a bunch of crap at school we've to deal with."

"But why stay back just for studying? Surely you can bring some books home if you really need to study." He paused again, stopping in his tracks. "You sure nothing's gone wrong at home?"

"I'm sure. It's just sometimes I prefer studying where it's quieter."

Still, John didn't seem convinced. Yet he kept silent and picked up his pace again, treading ever so slightly behind him as they continued in silence. His nerves began picking up. Why the sudden curiosity? John really never was pushy or intrusive, so where could it have come from? He wanted to say that something would happen if he went home, but he just couldn't since John would continue to question him after that, then again, he seemed to do that regardless of his answer. Maybe it was just John's own home life that was bothering him and made him want to make sure they were both alright.

They soon approached the library, John holding open the door for him as they headed in. As expected, no one was in there besides the librarian herself, who was decked out in a red and green cloak now that the holiday was upon them. The room now smelled of pine needles, either from an enchantment or because of a tree they couldn't see from where they were standing.

"C'mon, there's this book for herbology I need. Something about how to grow certain plants or whatever." John explained, pulling him down towards one of the many rows of books.

Freddie merely followed, still wondering what on earth was on John's mind. Was he regretting staying here and Roger going home? Surely he could've just stayed over Roger's if his parents were going to be absolute prats again. He watched John search for the book among the shelves, trying to see if there was any sort of abnormality in his face or movements. But it was the same stuff as usual. Perhaps John just didn't feel like going home. Some students do just hang back because they feel like it.

Once they sat themselves down, John pulled out the book he had grabbed and Freddie laid back in the chair. His body was continuing to berate him for doing so much when it desperately wanted to rest after spending so much of its energy in the last twenty-four hours. His eyes slowly shut, wanting to just drift back off into sleep once again. He tried closing his eyes, only to be greeted with a sudden flash of orange and jerking him awake, his hand instinctively rushing to his scarred leg and clutching it in his palm. Thankfully, John either hadn't noticed or didn't bother to ask this time around.

"Okay so we're supposed to go over this stuff about a charm to help with growing certain plants. No idea why we're using it to be honest if we're just gonna let them all grow on their own." John said while browsing through the book on the table.

Freddie barely heard him, his whole body starting to groan as the wounds strewn across his body began to ache again. All the fresh cuts and bites began pulsing almost in synch as he wrapped his arms around his stomach and tried steadying his breathing.

"You want to get the nurse? She might know what to do." John asked.

"N-no, no I'm fine, just sore." He admitted.

"I can see that. Makes sense though. Werewolf bites end up hurting every now and then."

It was as if time stopped moving. His chest was punched by some invisible force as ice shot through him, his eyes flying open a mere second after the words escaped from John's mouth. He looked down at the young fourth year, seeing a grim look in his eyes as he tried once more not to face him.

"I-I'm sorry they're bothering you...D-do you want me to go-"

He didn't let him say another word. Using all his remaining strength, Freddie jumped up, grabbed John by the arm and lugged him out of the library. His jaw clenched as he felt his heart steadily beat faster and faster, blood pounding through his body as each muscle violently tensed. He threw both of them into a nearby classroom, locking the door behind him as he looked around, thankful that it was empty besides a spider crawling around in its web above them.

"H-how the hell did you...How can...I...We didn't even-!" Freddie cried out, the rest of the panic now making him start to tremble once more. He knows. How many others do?! Oh lord the whole school probably knows and you'll be thrown out! Everyone'll know. Everyone...every-

"Freddie! Hey, it's okay."

"No it's not!" Freddie barked at him, clenching his fists as his body collapsed against the wall, slowly sliding down to the stone ground. "I-We didn't want anyone a-and you found out about it." He whipped his head in his direction. "How'd you find out?"

John was completely taken aback, his mouth hanging open as he stuttered while trying to find the right words, holding his hands out in front of him and gesturing around him as though that was getting his point across.

"I-I mean..." He began as his words came back to him. "I did see those scars while you were in the bathroom...But I just thought it was a dog or something until I'd done my dark arts homework and I got distracted and went back to my others books." He swallowed thickly, looking as though he was going to be sick himself. "...I read some stuff on nocturnal animals." He admitted, straightening himself out ever so slightly. "You're always sick near the full moon and a hell lot better after it and we never see you when it actually is a full moon..."

Look what you did! Oh god they're all gonna know...Brian's gonna flip. His eyes darted around the room as he made sure no one else was really in there, not even a ghost to spy on their conversation. All he got was his heavy breathing, the pounding of his heart against his chest, and John's wide-eyed stare that was full of terror and guilt.

"J-John please...Please tell me you didn't tell anyone. Even Roger..." He begged, flashing a pleading glance his way with his eyes as wide as they could go.

"No! No of course not. I didn't want to blab about something that I might've just been guessing at. I-I was just guessing at it earlier in case and-"

"Please...Please don't." He sobbed, his eyes starting to grow blurry with tears once again. "I-I didn't want anyone to know..."

All he got was a concerned nod in response. He looked down at him with worried eyes. "Who does, you know, know?"

"Brian and me. That was it. No teachers, no students, not even our families."

"Is that why you don't go home during the holidays?" John tried, even though the growing shadow in his eyes answered the question for him.

And yet he nodded, wiping away the tears that were streaming out of the corners of his eyes. "I-it always happens around the holidays." He explained, his usual fears starting to arise once again. "I can't hurt them...Even them knowing will ruin them..." He whispered softly. He looked back up at the startled Hufflepuff. "John please, please don't tell them. A-anyone. Roger, a teacher, even the bloody nurse here! Lord if my family found out...Or some random stranger overhearing it and letting it spread around a-and-"

His words suddenly stopped as they returned back to just being the usual thoughts. He grabbed a fistful of his hair in his right hand and bit down onto his whitening knuckles on the opposing fist. John took a seat next to him, bringing his knees up to his chest and lazily laying his arms over them. Freddie managed a look towards him, seeing a similar distress that he had seen far too many times in Brian's own expression.

"I won't." He finally said. "I mean, really, I don't even want to tell anyone. What good would it do?" He asked.

Freddie didn't respond, his mind still telling him otherwise. He's gonna let it slip out. Everyone'll know and you'll ruin everyone else's lives. The entire world will despise you for what you are.

He felt John's hand on his leg a moment later. Freddie looked down towards him, not an ounce of hostility inside of his eyes. Actually, all Freddie could really find was a much more hopeful light inside of his face. No fear, no anger, no disgust. Nothing that showed he was upset with what he was.

"Freddie, really. I'm not gonna tell. Why would I want to hurt both of you like that? I may not know a damn thing about actually dealing with this but I know that it's got to be hard."

They both remained silent for the next few minutes, John not pressing for any questions or even moving from his spot. Freddie's body was still at a conflict with itself. Anger's fight with his relief was the most obvious, making his stomach feel sick from the overwhelming, contrasting emotions quarreling with one another. He was relieved that John wasn't going to blab about this to everyone but he couldn't help but let those worrying thoughts convince him otherwise. How everyone was going to find out because he had screwed up or that they were going to make the same mistake eventually with a family member or Roger or a teacher. What if he bit someone because they got too nosey and followed them? What if their lives were ruined too because he'd screwed up in the first place?

"When did it happen?" John finally asked, Freddie returning to the present at his question.

His body turned to stone as all those memories he was trying to fight back from earlier resurfaced. That grim scene of the foreboding forest in front of him, darkness encapsulating him, the only light coming from the moon hanging above him, those deathly snarls from behind him while he clawed at the bloodstained grass, that orange gaze...

"T-third year..." He told him. "I-I had gone outside on the full moon a-and a rogue one was out near the forest..." He swallowed thickly. "It got me on my...my leg." He instantly grabbed his left leg, feeling the protruding scar through his trousers. "Brian found me..."

"Are the...the other scars I saw from that one?"

"No...When they're isolated they attack themselves. Almost every one I've on my body came from me." He continued, John's face going white at the admission.

"How did you hide it then? Surely you can't just sneak outside like that?"

"John please...I-I don't wanna talk about it right now." He begged, his body still feeling stiff and uneasy after just telling him the most basic recreation of what had actually happened.

"That's fine." John told him softly. "That where you were last night though? Not just feeling ill."

"Oh trust me!" He said with a crazed laugh. "You feel like your insides are poisoned when it actually happens! And before that you feel like your whole body isn't yours and that you're some host for a hungry parasite waiting to finally take it as its own." He admitted, his body growing even sicker at the thought of the previous night. John, somehow, had grown paler at his outburst, Freddie wishing he could slap himself.

He sighed heavily and looked up at the ceiling. "I'm sorry..." Freddie said softly. "Everyone in this world hates us. Even most of us can't stand what we are. L-letting anyone else know would e-end...badly."

Pain and regret tore at his heart, pushing it right up against his throat. They had tried so hard and for so long to keep it hidden. So damn hard. Risking everyone's safety around them by hiding him for an entire night, putting so much stress upon themselves to be leaps and bounds ahead of the rest of their year, and then having to lie to everyone they came across so that they wouldn't dare think that. How could that be fair to the others who hadn't done anything wrong? Hell, how was it fair to Brian who just wanted to protect him right from the start?

"I'm sorry..." John said solemnly. "I-I should've brought it up in a different way instead of just blurting it out."

He forced out a painful laugh. "It wouldn't have mattered...Nothing really matters to me." He muttered. Doubt swarmed his mind, that old urge to have the beast from so long ago actually kill him. Maybe then he wouldn't have to ruin everyone's lives around him. At least then there wouldn't always be the damn risk that he would end up killing someone.

"Y-You wanna go back up to the room? Might be better than, well, down here."

Freddie nodded, John helping him up from his seat on the ground. Again, neither of them spoke as they made their way up to the Ravenclaw tower. He figured John wasn't going to press for any more answers to the questions that were flying around in his head. Then there was himself. He was still pissed beyond belief that someone else had found out. Yes, he was happy that it was John, someone whom he was close to, and that he hadn't reacted negatively. But there was still that ever-sickening feeling that this ploy they had kept up for so long had finally started to come to a close. Someone else knew about it. It wasn't just their secret anymore. They didn't have any control over John and if it ever slipped out to Roger-

"Freddie? The riddle."

He snapped out of his trance, looking down at the metallic eagle that was awaiting his answer. He asked for it to repeat it, giving the answer a moment later and heading into the common room.

"C'mon then. You can hang out in here for a bit." Freddie offered.

"Are we allowed to-"

"It's a holiday anyway. Teachers aren't going to give a shit about that right now." He explained, watching as John hesitantly stepped inside.

"It's so different from Hufflepuff's." He commented. "Lot more blue."

"That tends to happen when your house colors are blue and gold." Freddie said.

"Yeah...But there's this different feel with it too." John replied as they continued into the common room. "Have you ever been inside another house?"

"Only Gryffindor. Roger had us over in there one night because of a party after they'd won the Quidditch Cup."

"Lord you should see him at one of those games! He's such a prominent voice in the crowd I can hear him across the field."

"It's Roger, what'd you expect? The guy could be heard from across the school!"

The two of them sat down inside of the common room, each taking a seat on the opposing couches while John's face continued to darken. On the other hand, his eyes were starting to brighten up at whatever thoughts were roaming around in his mind after the mere mention of his boyfriend.

"Well someone's getting all shy!" Freddie announced, John pulling a bashful grin a second after.

"W-well yes. Oh Fred you know what he's like but he's just so wonderful." He gushed as he clasped his hands while he nervously kept his arms between his legs. "He actually is quite sweet. You know that anyway. But he's so selfless and energetic that I could watch him for hours. He always puts everyone else above him to keep them safe and I swear he'd take a death spell right to his chest to save any of us. Just 'cause he's a bit loud at times doesn't eliminate that."

"Look at you, standing up for your boyfriend." Freddie said, grinning as his face went even darker at the comment.

"You're one to talk. Roger's told me all you two did when he got here was frot over one another in public." John retorted.

"Just like you two are doing now so hush."

"Prat."

"Bitch."

Both of them gave a heavy fit of laughter, John's embarrassment vanishing in an instant. Freddie leaned back into the couch, sighing as he stared up at the intricate designs across the ceiling of the common room. You gotta tell Bri while John's here. It's gonna kill him though. It's better than lying. What if he gets mad at him? He's not. John's fine. He's okay with it. Just remember that, he's okay with it.

...

It was nearing mid-afternoon, the castle still alive with those who were in it. Brian made his way into the Ravenclaw tower, pushing some old papers down to the bottom of his bag as he shut the door behind him. The flames cast that soothing blue light along the walls, the heat hitting his face as soon as he entered, Brian's whole body relaxing after spending ages in that frozen dungeon of a classroom.

As he entered the common room, he immediately took notice of Freddie and John sitting in the couches, still chatting about whatever it was they were talking about. The room went deathly silent, any sort of cheer vanishing and was replaced with cold fear. Freddie soon took notice of him, his gaze going dark as John fell silent as well. His face was more fearful than Freddie's. Why? Well that he didn't know...

"Freddie, what happened? You two look petrified." He asked instantly, not wanting to ignore anything bad that might've happened, especially with Freddie being in that vulnerable position after this morning. "Something happen with Roger? Or your parents?"

The only response he got was a shrug from John and a shake of the head from Freddie. He dropped his stuff onto the ground and headed over, sitting on the couch Freddie was sat on. Guilt and fear was etched into his face, forcing him to look over to John. A similar one sat upon his face with lines of worry mixed in.

"Brian..." John started. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't know it was this, well, big." He stated, swallowing thickly after getting his sentence out.

"Wait, what's 'big'?" He asked. His mind instantly went to Freddie breaking down without him around, suddenly throwing it all onto John. It'd explain the worry on John's face and the guilt on Freddie's. But why the fear on both of theirs?

"He...He knows." Freddie muttered in a venomous voice. His grip tightened around his body as Brian's stomach instantly shrunk, the blood draining from his face.

"A-about what?" He asked. A small sliver of hope sat at the back of his mind. That John had only guessed about some other ridiculous thing. But that terrible look in Freddie's eyes shut down any kind of chance it was really about anything but that.

"I-I didn't mean to intrude on it...Honestly! I-I just...Noticed some stuff and took a guess..." John stuttered, obviously terrified that he would lash out at him.

"B-but how?" We were so careful.

"I-I saw some of those...scars on Freddie's torso. Him missing on the night of the full moon only strengthened my guess...I brought it up to him earlier and well..."

He paused, his eyes still wide with fear. Brian leaned back, holding his stomach to try and control the storm of emotions that were swarming around in his mind. Confusion was the most prominent, sadness lurking beneath it with a twinge of anger at himself for not doing a better job at keeping it hidden from anyone else. Everyone's gonna know and it's your fault. You can't protect him if they all know.

"Brian, I-I promise I won't tell anyone! Even Roger. I'm okay with...with being quiet about it." John mentioned.

His grip on the door tightened as he shut it behind him. The smallest twinge of anger began to boil up with that dazing crash of desperation. He managed a look over at Freddie, his face hanging low as he avoided any eye contact with him.

"Please...Please don't tell anyone. We've kept it between us since third year." He told John in a low voice. "You know how people would react to it. It'd spread everywhere. Two students keeping it a secret from the most prodigious school around here? God, all three of us would be hounded or isolated..."

"I know...Trust me, I know. People never take kindly to these sorts of things and finding out their kids have been at school with a werewolf wouldn't be taken lightly."

Freddie's whole body twitched as his jaw clenched up at the mere mention of the beast's name. He laid his hand on top of his leg, Freddie not even looking over or even registering that he had touched him. John pulled himself into a closed position laying his arms loosely around his knees that were now pressed up against his chest.

"I-I don't know if it would mean much..." John began, looking nervously up at both of them. "I-I mean I get keeping it a secret but I didn't think nobody else knew. Heh...Two students managing to keep a secret that long and little ol' me noticed it before a teacher." John paused, looking towards them before going back to his original statement. "But I don't mind helping out. I-if you want I mean..."

Brian's curiosity broke through the rest of his emotions. John took notice of this and brightened up a bit, pushing himself up and pulling a weak smile. "I-I mean two is better than one, right? And Fred...I know you didn't want anyone else to know but I'm okay with helping you two out. If anyone gets on your case I'll stand up for you or if you need any help when Brian can't be there, I can take his place." He paused, looking down at the ground again. "I don't know how hard it's been on you two for the past few years...But now that I do know what's going on, I don't want to sit around and do nothing. I wanna be there and help out the best I can."

He looked over at his partner, seeing a slightly hopeful light in his still dark eyes. Freddie managed to push himself up, looking over at John whose happiness had immediately vanished. John shrunk back as Freddie crossed his legs and leaned forward, balancing himself on his elbows on top of his legs.

"I'm alright with it." Freddie stated bluntly. "John, just please don't tell anyone. Don't let the teachers or another student know, alright?"

"Yeah! Yeah that's fine!" He piped out, adding a glance his way. "Brian, this can at least take some stress off of you. Having an extra hand should help out a bit and now you don't have to make up shit with just me anymore."

He was hesitant. They'd gone so long on their own with this. How could they suddenly bring someone in? There wasn't a doubt in his mind that John would be quiet. But there was still such a risk having someone else involved, especially someone younger than both of them. Roger would be furious if John ever got infected and wouldn't stop until he found out who did it. If he ever found out it was one of his best friends...it'd crush him to have to choose. Then what would they do? Harbor another werewolf in the school? Hell he had no idea what two of them in the same room would do to each other...

Yet out of their two friends, John most certainly was the one who, if he had to choose, he'd rather have find out. He practically worshipped learning how to defend himself against these sorts of creatures and was easily at Roger's level in that class. He loved all those magical creatures too and that did include what Freddie was. Plus, he was their friend. He wasn't going to go talk about it to others if they told him not to.

"Alright...I mean, we've time before anything has to be done." Brian said while scratching the back of his head. "But I mean...It shouldn't be terrible. Thanks, really."

"For what?"

"Not telling. The help too." Brian finished, John merely shrugging and pulling a much more convincing smile than earlier. Brian couldn't fight the one spreading on his face either. The sheer relief of it all that John wasn't going to spill the secret out was truly something he had only hoped for if they ever found out. Freddie too seemed a bit better, albeit still looking a bit upset for whatever reason.

"Is there anything you want me to do? I mean, I know it was last night. I can get something if you use a healing potion or maybe-"

"They don't bloody work." Freddie growled venomously.

"No John. It's alright." Brian interjected, wishing he hadn't seen the scared reaction from John. He searched quickly for some kind of conversation changer. "Isn't it time for dinner?"

"Aren't you two gonna eat?"

"Later. Don't worry, we'll be fine." Brian continued. Though he was hungry, Brian couldn't help but see that pleading shadow in Freddie's eyes that begged him to stay. Something lurked at the corner of his gaze, his mouth ever so slightly open, the sentence he wanted to say hanging at the edge of his lips.

John merely nodded, getting up and straightening out his clothes. He gave a quick goodbye before heading out, Freddie getting himself into an even more closed position and staring into the blazing fire.

"It's my fault..." He admitted absently. "He...I was in the bathroom yesterday a-and looked under my shirt. John came in and..."

"Freddie, it's alright. People have scars." Brian told him. "Besides, I'm sure your parents have seen them at least once. John's just an animal geek. That's the only reason why he noticed."

"So? What if Roger walked in...?" He asked, Brian already knowing what scenario was going through his head.

"Fred...I highly doubt Roger would hate you. Or anyone for that matter. If John's okay with it, surely other people would. As I said, the only real reason John knew was because he's obsessed with this stuff, not because we made it obvious."

But even Brian could barely believe his words. While it wasn't a giant leap for John to guess at what happened to Freddie, it still took a good amount of observation. What if others did know? And they just didn't tell them or speculated it with others and were called crazy? His stomach grew sick at the thought. Brian these are kids. They're not going to be that smart. John only found out because he obsesses over these sorts of things and hangs out with us all the time.

"It's alright. It's John anyway. He's our friend and he's already shown to be more than happy to help out. He's not mad or anything. That's good, right?"

"I know it's meant to be a good thing." Freddie began, pushing himself up and putting his focus down onto the ground. "But still...I should've been more careful or told him that it was just a bad dog attack or even a bad encounter with a hippogriff so he'd drop the thought." He paused, running his hand through his hair and heaving a heavy sigh. "I just can't believe our luck that he's actually alright with this."

"He's our friend. He wants to help and yeah he'll be a bit naïve with it at first; he'll get used to it quickly."

"And Roger's our friend too and we know how he feels about this sort of stuff. Oh yes let's kick all of them out of society because of the threat they pose. I'm close to agreeing with him."

"Fred don't think that. It's Roger. You know what happened with his grandfather. If he even found out about what happened to you I doubt he'd isolate you. He might actually try to find that one for you!" He tried in his best hopeful voice, glad to see a small light back in Freddie's eyes.

"It's just scary. We've been doing this by ourselves for so long..."

"I know but now this can be easier! John knows so much on how to deal with these creatures and all those other ones at night and how to defend him and us against them pretty damn well." You know there's a chance he could get hurt too...He's younger than both of you and Freddie won't forgive himself if he hurt anyone. He shook his head, shooing the thoughts out of his mind and laying his hand atop Freddie's lap. Freddie gave him a hopeful look too, pulling a weak smile and leaning over, throwing his arms around his neck and pulling his body closer. Brian sighed softly, savoring the warm touch of his lover's body and running his fingers through his hair, gladly taking the time to enjoy the fleeting moment of peace.

...

The bed creaked loudly, suddenly taking Brian out of his sleep as he looked over to see Freddie baring that sweet smile and clad in what he assumed was a new sweater and an old pair of trousers. He could already hear Twilight and Clover down the stairs, chattering away while they waited for him to wake up.

"C'mon love, John's waiting downstairs too. I invited him to come up here with us for the morning." Freddie told him.

After blinking the remaining sleep out of his eyes, the realization that it was Christmas morning struck him like a boulder. He sat right up, giving his head a quick shake and looking over at his boyfriend who was holding out his hand to help him up. Without hesitation, he took the help and Freddie helped him out of bed, his lover flattening out his wrinkled pajamas for him and untying the knot on his trousers.

"It's Christmas morning. No need to look formal for John and me." He explained softly.

Sweet pastry scents wafted up from the common room, those decadent warm fruits and spices making his stomach growl. John was sitting in front of the fireplace once again, gently petting Twilight while Clover groomed herself. Miscellaneous gifts were around the couch, each with a little nametag with its correspondent written in various fonts, depending on who it was from. Right on top was a large box that held his mother's script on the little tag and Brian could almost smell the desserts through the wrapping.

John reached out to the small platter in front of him that held the various pastries, deciding to take a danish with a yellow center. Freddie took a seat next to the gifts, Brian sitting next to him and taking one of the sweets with a red center and white drizzle.

"Happy Christmas Bri!" John said happily after he swallowed his bite. "I'd brought up some stuff from the dining hall so we could eat together. Found it more fun than being down in the dining hall to be honest."

"Good idea there. Honestly, that place isn't the best, full or empty." Brian admitted after taking a bite of his pastry, feeling glad to find that it was a strawberry flavored one.

Each began opening their presents. John's family hadn't sent him anything besides a small wrapped brownie that seemed to have gone stale or was as hard as a rock anyway. On the other hand, Roger's gift of an old signed copy of Fantastic Beasts immediately brightened his mood as he held it close to his chest and delicately laid it next to his lap. Both he and Freddie had chipped in on getting him a new scarf that was charmed to become the colors of one's house along with a few treats from Honeydukes. Brian had brought out his penguin that his parents had gotten him and let the small pin waddle around at his side, only to fall silent a moment later. His mother had, as expected, sent another whole basket of homemade desserts ranging from her own fudge to mini muffins stuffed with miscellaneous fruits or chocolate.

"Oh fuck! I left your gift upstairs, gimme a second Bri." Freddie said suddenly, leaping up from his seat and dashing back upstairs.

The fire sparked violently, yanking his attention away from Freddie as he turned towards the fire that was now devouring the brownie that John's family had sent him, tearing at the old plastic and treating it like a piece of charcoal. Resentment burned beneath his eyes while the expected sadness still lingered.

"I'm sorry they're like this even at Christmas." Brian told him softly.

"Like it matters. They're like this anyway. God just because-" John started, his anger starting to rise to the surface, only to be cut off by Freddie heading back into the room with two packages on top of his scrawny arms, the massive one giving him the most trouble. John got up, not saying anything else about what was on his mind and helped Freddie carry the package over to him.

"You've no idea how hard it was to keep it hidden for so long! All those muggles nearly killing me while I tried to get it. But I just had to get it for you." Freddie said with a grin.

Without even waiting a second, Brian tore open the packaging, seeing a large brown box inside of it. He ripped the tape off, opening it up to find a brand-new record player sitting inside. He immediately went speechless, quickly turning over to hug his lover while trying to keep it steady on his lap.

"How'd you even guess-"

"I know how much you adore muggle music and you having to go months without listening to anything is dreadful. Besides, what good is wizard music all the time anyway?" He finished, motioning towards the second gift he'd gotten.

In an instant, he was on the thin package, tearing off the wrapping paper and staring wide-eyed at the new Beatles' album A Hard Day's Night.

"Jesus Fred! How'd you even get a copy? They were sold out the day it came out where I lived." John exclaimed, leaning forward to marvel at the new album.

"I have my ways. Glad I got it though. Almost had to tear it out of some broad's hand and keeping it hidden was a pain in the ass."

"Freddie...really, thank you!" Brian said breathlessly as he delicately placed it on the couch behind him. He reached over to the last gift that was under the tree, seeing Freddie's name scrawled out in his own handwriting. Excitement began bubbling up inside of him, only growing stronger with every passing second.

"Now your gift." He began as he handed it off to him. "I hope you'll like it."

He watched as Freddie slowly opened up the gift, staring with his mouth gaping open at the old grey cat that rolled back and forth on the covers beneath her in the little picture on the top of the book. Her green eyes looked directly at him, her mouth moving as though she was letting out a meow. Freddie opened up the little book, seeing a bunch of moving pictures of his dear Charlotte over the years that Brian had taken. His finger traced along one from their first year, Freddie holding Charlotte up to his face and baring a wide grin, his eyes beaming with adoration and the scene ending with him breaking out into a laugh.

"That one was from when we first began hanging out." Brian explained, Freddie only giving a sad smile as he looked down at the picture of his beloved cat.

"Oh lord I miss her..." He commented while looking across at the other pictures that were on the first page of the book. He wiped away the small tear that was falling down across the side of his face. "Thank you Bri..." He finished, leaning forward and replicating his hug from earlier.

With all the gifts unwrapped, the three of them had only a mere second to relax after cleaning up all the wrapping paper. A deep hoot sounded from outside, an insistent pecking soon following.

"Zephyr!" John shouted as he got up, unlocking the window and letting in the giant snowy owl. A large, green envelope sat inside of his beak, Roger's handwriting sitting on the front.

"Just in time." John said to himself as he took the letter out of Zephyr's mouth, handing him a piece of bread from the breakfast platter, the owl giving a loud hoot afterwards.

"Thanks...I dunno how it got here so fast."

"He must've gotten it out as soon as he got home." Freddie suggested as he came over and began petting Roger's owl, it's giant yellow eyes brightening up as he gladly took to Freddie's gentle stroking.

However, John had gone silent, hardly listening to anything Freddie had just said. Brian sat up a bit, trying to get a better view of John from his seat on the couch. His hand was cupping the side of his face as he read Roger's letter to himself, his eyes going slightly misty while reading it.

"Oh he's such a sweetheart. A complete dork at that...But still." John whispered as he tucked it away in his side pocket. He looked up at the both of them, looking slightly embarrassed at his reaction. "It's the first Christmas we've spent apart...Least since we got here."

He walked over to where Freddie was standing, holding out his arm for Zephyr to jump onto. The large bird gladly did, John leading it over to the window and letting him fly out. John stared out into the sky, watching as the owl's large frame grew smaller and smaller until it vanished from sight.

"Why didn't you go back?" Brian asked as he stood up and headed over to where Freddie was standing. "Did something happen at home again?"

"Nothing different from the usual." John told them bluntly. "Why else do you think Roger never stays at my place?"

"You still could've stayed at his. He did offer..." Freddie brought up.

"And his family would've questioned me about why I was there and not with my family and I just didn't want to deal with that. Not again. Besides...P-part of it was because of you Fred."

"Me?"

"I...I was worried about you two." He admitted. He turned to face them and leaned back onto the windowsill. "This would be the third year you two have stayed back here. It's not like you two are falling behind in class and would fail if you took time off." He paused, looking regretful as though he had done something terribly wrong. "A-after I saw you in the restroom earlier this week...I thought something was up and decided to stay back in case something happened. It really only hit me that night of what might've been going on and I didn't want to have had that realization back home while you two dealt with it again by yourselves."

John looked up at both of them, concern darkening his eyes while hope lit them right back up. Brian looked down at his partner, a guilty and hating shadow casting itself over his face as he wrapped his arms around his stomach. He brought his hand up to the center of his back, running his hand across his spine while he brought his hand up to his mouth and nervously chewed at his nails.

"Honestly...I thought I was being ridiculous about it. But I guess stupid things can be the truth." John bit down on his lower lip. "I-I guess what I'm saying is that I wanna help. I-I know a lot about them and, as said, some more help should be a good thing. I promise I won't tell anyone! If anything happens to Bri then you've me and..." His voice trailed off as he looked down at the ground. "I'm sorry for confronting you like that. I didn't know how else to bring it up. I hadn't known but now that I do I wanna be there to help you guys out. You're my friends. I don't want to sit by and do nothing when I could help out with this."

"We kept it secret for so long..." Freddie said absentmindedly. "I-I thought we were doing the right thing or just enough so no one would ever confront us about it."

Brian felt his body tense up for a split second as Freddie's jaw clenched. "John...Thank you...really. I'd be fine with having you help out."

His face brightened up. "A-and you Fred?" He asked hopefully, Freddie giving a small nod in response. "T-thanks! I-I'll try my best to help out with this. I mean...Being a werewolf is hard enough in itself-Fred you okay?"

As soon as the sentence left John's mouth, Freddie freed himself from his hold around him and crossed his arms over his chest, looking down at the ground and sighing loudly. "I know what I am...Just not used to hearing it aloud."

The room fell silent as John headed over to where they were standing. Brian could only think back to when he and Freddie had been discussing it with Madame Jones. Ever since then neither of them had dared to say it and even the sheer mentioning of the beast by name would only make Freddie feel even worse. He hadn't ever slipped up with it and all he could hope for was that John would learn eventually not to bring it up. Even though he knew John had a lot to learn about what was going on, Brian could only focus on how different it'd be now that someone else knew about what they had kept secret for so long.