Pagsara ni Adi ng laptop, nagpasalamat siya sa huling klase niya sa maghapon. It was their last day of classes for the semester. Medyo masakit sa dibdib dahil ito na rin ang huling araw na tatayo siya sa platform, sa harapan ng mga estudyante, at sa trabahong minahal niya sa loob ng dalawang taon.

Nagpaalam at nagpasalamat na rin ang ibang estudyante sa kaniya. Sinabi niyang i-enjoy ng mga ito ang dalawang linggong bakasyon at mag-refresh para sa susunod na semester.

Some said, 'See you soon,' and she just smiled, not saying a word.

Habang inaayos niya ang mga gamit sa lamesa, naiwan ang apat na estudyante niya. Inaayos ng mga ito ang kanya-kanyang buhok at makeup na ikinangiti niya. She used to be like them, too.

"Miss Adi?" One of her female students smiled. "Puwede pong magtanong about you and Zed Almazan? I mean, we're aware na kasal po kayo... pero bakit parang ang aga?"

Adi frowned, but smiled. "What made you ask?"

"Wala naman po." The other girl said casually. "Naging topic po kasi namin kayo ng ibang friends namin kahapon noong nakita namin kayo sa livestream ng game. Sinabi ng isang senior na kasama namin sa PE, palagi raw talaga kayong napapakita before."

It was true, but she didn't interrupt.

"Then noong seasons na wala kayo, nagkaroon pa nga ng speculations na naghiwalay na kayo." Maries, one of the students said. "Pero, naghiwalay po ba talaga kayo or naging busy?"

Adi was about to answer, but was interrupted by Kyla.

"Huwag muna 'yan. Parang gusto ko malaman ang love story, Miss Adi. Like what made you decide to get married young? Ilang years na po kayong kasal... something like that? Were you like... pregnant?"

Napangiti siya sa huling tanong. Bago sumagot, tinapos muna niya ang pagliligpit sa mga gamit na nasa lamesa at naupo isang upuan na nakaharap sa apat na babae.

It was refreshing when someone ask her about the story with Zed. Ni hindi na niya maalala ang huling beses na napag-usapan ang tungkol doon dahil wala namang nagtatanong. Maybe too shy to ask? For sure.

"I wasn't pregnant when we got married," paglilinaw ni Adi. "We were fourteen when we started dating. Not to be mayabang, pero that time, ako ang pinakamatalino sa class and si Zed, nagsisimula na siyang magkaroon ng pangalan sa basketball. Nasa junior league na siya and he was the star athlete that time. I was the top one naman."

Nagkatingnan ang apat na babae, malalaki ang mata, nakangiti, at ang iba ay napanganga.

"Parang sa books!" One exclaimed. "Parang iyong troupes sa books na matalino si girl, star athlete si guy. Grabe, ang cute. Tapos? Tapos po?"

"We've been supporting each other since then. Kapag may practice siya, nasa bleacher ako para manood. Kapag may laro sila o laban sa league, I'll be with him. Kapag naman may inilalaban ako for the university para sa competitions like debate or anything, he's with me. Kapag kailangan kong mag-aral sa library, he'll keep me company. We're like that."

Yumuko si Adi habang nakatingin sa wedding ring at engagement ring na suot niya. Palaging magkatabi ang dalawa, hindi naghihiwalay... kahit na sila ni Zed ang nagkahiwalay.

"We never broke up. We were each other's first. As in kaming dalawa lang. Umikot na ang mundo namin sa isa't isa, and that was when we decided to get married at 18. We were 16 that time," natawa si Adi at nakagat ang labi dahil nahiya siya. "Nagplano talaga kami. No pregnancy, not even a scare cos we only did it after getting married and made sure we're protected. Wala sa plano or wala pa sa plano namin ang magkaanak."

The girls were intently listening to her, not minding the time. Kumportable rin naman siyang magkwento dahil para niyang binabalikan ang nakaraan. It was her favorite story, their story.

"Buti po pinayagan kayo ng parents n'yo? Like... you were so young!"

Adi laughed hysterically, making the four girls confused and curious. Pinilit ng mga ito si Adi na ikuwento kung ano at paano ang nangyari.

"Sixteen nga kami nag-plan, right? So, we searched. The laws, everything. Para saan pang matalino ako kung hindi ko gagamitin?" Tumaas ang kilay ni Adi at ngumuso pa na para bang maganda ang ginawa nila. "We threatened our parents na kapag hindi nila kami pinayagang magpakasal, we'll just elope and might as well ruin our future. Kasi nga, we were convinced na we're each other's future talaga."

The four girls laughed with her. Tawang tawa na halos hindi makapaniwalang ganoon pala ang ginawa nila ni Zed, lalo ni Adi dahil kilala nila itong prim and proper, hindi nila inasahang may kalokohan.

Kung alam lang ng iba kung gaano siya kaloko noong kabataan niya.

"Zed told his parents na kapag hindi kami pinayagan, he'll drop out and stop basketball. We'll elope nga. He'll just work normally, no more dreams. Ganiyan siya katanga that time," tawang-tawa si Adi. "Ako naman, everyone expects me to be what I am today, like achieved... everything. Sinabi ko sa parents ko na I won't study well, I'll drop out, too... and just do whatever I want with Zed."

"They believed you?"

Adi's lips curled into a smile, revealing her rings. "They knew we were serious when we skipped one class because we were never absent unless we were in the hospital, sick. And it was literally that one thing we both wanted," she chuckled.

The girls literally screamed and burst out laughing. Kahit naman sila ni Zed, natatawa kapag naalala kung ano ang ginawa nila at kung paano nila pinagbantaan ang magulang nila, makapagpakasal lang. It was so funny that everything they'd talk about it, they'd laugh hysterically and wouldn't move on.

Minsan naiiyak pa si Adi na humantong sila sa ganoon ngunit wala silang pinagsisihan.

"Oh, some thought po kasi na baka kayo nagpakasal nang maaga kasi buntis ka, Miss Adi. Ganoon kasi usually ang reason," dagdag ng isa.

Umiling siya. "Ni hindi pa nga namin napag-uusapang magkaanak kahit ngayong puwede naman na," ngumiti siya.

"But is it true na naghiwalay kayo and you recently got back together?" tanong ni Iris. "If you're comfortable to share, Miss Adi. Bakit? Nagsisi ba kayo na sobrang aga kaya kayo naghiwalay?"

"That's not the reason why. Kung tutuusin, mababaw at ako ang may issue," Adi looked down, admitting her fault. "Before graduation, nasanay kasi kaming magkasama palagi. Sanay akong sabay kaming umuuwi, pumapasok sa school. Same schedule kami. Sumusunod ako sa schedule niya as an athlete para kasama pa rin kami kahit busy, but life after graduation... while working changed everything," she inhaled.

Nakayuko lang si Adi habang inaalala ang pagkakamali niya.

"We rarely see each other anymore. Kapag uuwi siya, tulog na 'ko. Sa umaga, tulog pa siya... paalis na 'ko. We rarely communicate, we—" Adi bit her lower lip. "We got busy with our lives, parang nawala sa ang kami. We were busy building our care—"

Tumigil siya at hinarap ang apat na babaeng nakikinig sa kaniya.

"I got busy building my career." She ended the conversation. Okay na rin na ganiyan ang tingin sa kaniya ng iba.

That conversation ended, the story didn't. Nakaalis na ang apat na babae, naiwan siya sa classroom at naglakad palapit sa bintana at inalala ang dahilan.

She didn't fall out of love. She would never. People thought she did, just because. But no, never.

Adi was just tired.

Tired from waking up alone beside Zed. Together, but apart.

Tired of letting the schedule dictate breakfast and dinner.

Tired of feeling like she wasn't doing enough for her husband.

Before, it was easy. They moved in the same direction, at the same pace. She could follow him and still feel whole.

But after graduation, after starting her career... her world expanded. Na parang sumikip ang lahat simula nang lumawak mundo niya.

Every small mistake he made became proof of how overwhelmed she already was. The shoe rack wasn't the problem. The noise wasn't the problem. Zed wasn't the problem.

She chose space.

Not because she wanted Zed gone, but because she was scared that staying would ruin what they had.

—

Tinatapos ni Adi ang pag-upload ng grades ng klase niya nang lumapit sa kaniya si Beatriz para ibigay ang isang slice ng black forest cake galing sa farewell party niya. Malungkot itong nakatitig sa kaniya, nakapatong ang baba sa backrest ng swivel chair, at nakanguso dahil medyo nagtatampo ito sa kaniya.

"Ano ka ba?" mahinang natawa si Adi na hindi nililingon si Bea. "We have communication, we can still see each other. Labas tayo minsan. Jobless naman ako kaya ako ang mag-a-adjust sa 'yo."

Tipid na ngumiti si Bea. "May bagong work ka na ba or like are you applying for a new one?"

"Hindi pa," umiling siya at tumigil sa pag-type. "So far, wala pa akong plano. After resigning, to be honest, I don't know what I'll do after pero bahala na. Maybe I'll focus on being a wife muna this time? Not sure, but maybe."

Bea agreed and even suggested she should try baking cookies. Nakita raw nito na kadalasan ng mga bagong resign, nag-aaral mag-bake ng cookie na hindi niya alam kung saan nito nakuha ang idea. It wasn't a bad idea, maybe she'd add it to her to-do list.

"I'll miss the job, the place," pag-amin niya kay Bea. "But I can't stay here any longer. Alam ko naman na hindi ako gusto ng ibang ka-work natin and as much as I love my job, I can't bear with any more issues about me. On going pa nga ang cases ko with those students, parang hindi ko gugustuhing pumasok araw-araw ulit sa lugar na parang naramdaman kong hindi ako safe. I can't be on the same space where I'm not welcome."

Adi realized that after spending more time with Zed's world recently. She was loved, accepted, adored, and admired... but in her own world, she was being talked behind her back, humiliated, sexualized, and issued.

"I understand," Bea nodded. "You do you, and being a wife looks good on you. I mean... never ka namang pumangit or never ka namang nagkaroon ng awkward phase while working, but you glow."

Adi bit her lower lip and smiled. Dapat lang. She had sex with Zed this morning, dapat talaga may after-sex glow.

"Honestly, I missed being just a wife," Adi admitted shamelessly. "I missed being his wife."

—
T H E X W H Y S
www.thexwhys.com