I didn't think it to be this bad of a feeling inside. I felt empty and I can't repeat it enough times. The feeling is so excruciating that I want to go to sleep and never wake. Once the ceremony was over I was the first to leave. I had no feeling and I was going to return to Idris. I packed my belongings and didn't say goodbye. Instead inside my sleeping quarter I created a portal.

I quickly and swiftly step inside the portal and leave. I returned to my sleeping quarters in that of Idris. I quickly unpacked all of my belongings. Then a new rune came into my mind. A rune I wouldn't share with the clave. A rune I'd keep to myself and never explain. A rune that resembles pain, loss, death, and a vow. The vow I made when he died that day.

I began to get fire messages and I just threw them away. Ignoring the constant knocks at my door. The constant fire messages and the calls of my parents. I knew one day I'd lose them all, but my parapatai. This was the worst feeling I've ever been through. I vow to myself to never feel again no matter what. To never fall in love, to never let anyone break my walls.

To be cold, ruthless and do anything to avenge my parapatai. I promise you Jesse I will find those demons and I'll kill them for you.
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1322
Paris

Trinitys POV

I lost my parents to that of old age like I knew. I watched my friends and the fellow shadowhunters die. The old clave members die of old age. The downworlders were those who hadn't died. I made peace with them and friends within their community.

"Athena" I call out

"Yes miss Shadowhunter" she says

I haven't let anyone call me Lina any longer. No one knows of that nickname. I intend to keep it as such for as long as I'm here.

"When is Clive coming he's going to be late and he knows I don't do late" I said without putting my book down

"Miss Shadowhunter it's a pleasure to be here" his voice filled the room

I snapped my fingers and he was then seated in a chair.

"Your dismissed Athena" I said and my maid left

Suddenly my cat Cheshire jumped into my lap. I smiled at my lovely cat/human companion. Often warlocks have some or mundanes keep pets. I call him my assistant and companion. I find it offensive to call him a mere pet.

"Miss Shadowhunter I was informed you wanted to speak business?" Clive said and looked nervously at Cheshire

"You are correct Clive, I need that book you've been so "secretly" hiding from me" i said and placed down my book to look at him

I smirked as I watched him gulp and fidget in his chair. My eyes flashed a purple and his eyes widened. He gave me a look that I knew all too well.

"Do not lie Mr.Wilmington, for your life is on the line and you know I don't care for clave rules any longer" I smirked

"Here right here" he snapped his fingers and the book appeared

"Well done young warlock, I suggest you hide nothing again are we clear" I said

"Most clear as ever Miss Shadowhunter" he said

"Your dismissed" I said

He scurried out of the room and down the hall. I opened the book and found what I had longed for. It was a family book the one someone stole from me. Years ago a little while before my parents died. Someone had invaded the wards of Idris. My home was trashed and things went missing. I had searched and they were very well hidden. I vowed to find them and I did just that.

Piece by piece I found what was missing this being the last of it. If your wondering if I stood to my vow for Jesse. You must be informed that I did just that. Bouncing from demon to demon, warlock to warlock, seelie to seelie and shadowhunter to shadowhunter. I found them barley two months after his passing. I slaughtered them just as I vowed.

I don't regret letting my inner demon shine through. In fact over the years I've let her loose a bit.

"Miss Shadowhunter, Ethan Galloway has arrived" Athena said

"Ooo send him in right away" I smiled
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"That was indeed fun Miss Shadowhunter" Ethan said

"Your very handsome I might say, but this is a onetime deal I must say" I told him

"Or course I shall leave now" he says

"Very well" I said and waved him off

I broke the vow of waiting for my soulmate anchor. I've grown tired and impatient of the long wait. Not having found the one in years. Nearly at the age of 100 years old that being a century old. It's hard watching those you cared for disappear.
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1715
New York

Trinitys POV

"Happy 514th birthday" Finn said

"Yes Finn I have officially been alive for five centuries and fourteen years" I said as I drank the glass of Bourbon

"Thank you all who have joined us today at the Eastwood ball for Miss Shadowhunter's birthday" Finn called out

"Congratulations on making it another year" Tracy said

"Young seelie how kind of you" I said

"Anything for a fellow downworlder" she said

"You forget I'm not fully your kind" I said

"Yes but your two parts downworlder and we can't ignore that" she said

"She's very right" magnus said

"Ahh magnus bane nice to see you and young as ever" I smiled at the warlock

"Im officially the same age as you might I add" I smiled

"Yes dear it is true" he says

"Magnus over here" a vampire calls out

"I'll be back Lina" he says

I haven't let anyone in centuries call me that. I had a different connection with Magnus. We met when he was having a difficult time. He also helps me keep in control of my darkness. That's what I call it now, my darkness. It's true it is overall a deep darkness that is inside me. Magnus has tried helping me find my soulmate anchor. To no avail we still haven't found them.

Magnus and I live in this place together here in New York. I've gone back to working at the institute. I train young shadowhunters and go on missions. I do solo missions unless it's necessary to have more people with me. I don't get along with others for versions reasons. The Lightwood family run the New York institute. I've long left Idris and London for now.