Chapter Twenty-Two

   After a good ten minutes of us just sitting quietly, he pushed my shoulders from him a little with one hand and put his other hand under my chin to gesture for me to look up at him, I did. ‘Now, you; have you stopped crying?’ He paused, I nodded. ‘And have you emptied your head? You did talk a lot just now.’ A small smile tinted my lips. ‘I take that as a yes.’ He leant down suddenly and pressed his lips to mine; my hands reflexes brought them up and my palms lay on his cheeks, my smile still on my lips as we kissed. It only took a little pressure from him to have me on my back with him leaning over me (his body laid out next to me still). Parting our lips a little, he said, ‘I’m glad to see you smiling again, Tif. It seems ages since I’ve seen it, fangs and all.’ I smiled wider. My hands were holding the wrist of his which still had its palm to my cheek. ‘You’re quiet all of a sudden,’ he hinted, while his thumb brushed along my smiling lips.

I kissed his thumb then spoke. ‘I’m surprised at what you said that’s all. Plus I don’t want to ruin anything.’

   ‘You won’t,’ he whispered in my ear as he leant done. His lips made their way from the top of my cheek to mine one more time. I lay still, my hands still holding his wrist, I felt my grip tighten as his lips pressed more to mine; as well as them parting and his tongue tracing along my smile. A slight growl escaped both our throats as it turned passionate, he had pressed his body to mine more and more with each passing minute but he still hadn’t placed himself on me completely. I had at least moved one hand and placed it on his shoulder, gripping it slightly.

   ‘Mmmm,’ he mumbled and brought himself up, so quickly that my lips stayed pouted for a few seconds. ‘Oh, Tif, there’s so much more I want right now, as you can probably tell, but as bad as the temptation is I won’t do anything tonight. We’ve had a long few days and neither of us has really properly fed.’ His expression turned a little sorrowful.

   ‘But, we basically fed the other night, from each other.’ My last three words hushed to a barely audible whisper.

   ‘Yes, but it’s not enough sometimes. And I don’t think it is at all for me. Please don’t feel like you’re not enough; and spare me the thought of sounding like I’m using you but you’re blood is so sweet, it’s amazing and when we kiss with blood, I can just make myself stop from sucking you dry.’ His head dropped. ‘Damn, I sound so vicious.’ Then he added on a chuckle. ‘Ah well, it’s part of the job, I guess. How are you feeling?’ he added casually.

   Still smiling, I realised I wasn’t really feeling anything at this point in time, which possibly meant that I was content for the time being. ‘As happy as I need to be, nothing could be better right now. I love you too, Michael.’ And I leant up and pecked his lips.

   ‘You don’t need to add my full name on the end you know, Mike is fine enough.’

   ‘Yeh, like how you just call me Tif, but I just want you to know that I mean it. Plus it’s not like I’m using your true name is it. Eesh,’ I shivered. ‘I can’t imagine what that would feel like.’

   Right at that point, Mike’s lips curled into a dark, evil smile; it made me shiver more as it was so mystifying but it wasn’t until he spoke next that I figured why he had done that. ‘Would you like to find out, Timara?’

   At my name, my chest seized and I gasped sharply; my arms locked by my sides and I fisted my hands so tightly that I could feel my nails on the edge of breaking the skin of my palms. ‘Mike, you wouldn’t?!’ I exclaimed. ‘Please!!’ I begged, though unable to move. ‘Please don’t ever use that name again.’ Fresh, salty tears streamed down my face.

   Mike’s expression had now turned to shock at my reaction of him using my true name and his hands had shot out to grab my upper arms in case I would fall backwards. ‘Woh, Tif, I’d never do such a thing to you. Never. You have no need to beg me not to. Forgive me; I didn’t know it has such an effect on you. I was just playing with the idea, but now I see that that was the worst decision I have made as yet with you. Forgive me,’ he repeated, his eyes were gentle and deep.

   Drawing in an extremely deep breath, my body slumped from its tensed pose. ‘Michael, it’s ok. I forgive you; I believe you didn’t know and I don’t blame you for that. Just promise me from now on that you won’t say that again, my name I mean.’ Slight worry brushed my face.

   ‘I promise you, Tif. I won’t ever use your name again, not in any way,’ he swore as he stared into my eyes. Throwing my arms around him, I squeezed his chest and pressed my cheek to his; I let go after five seconds. ‘In a weird way, it’s too bad that you don’t know mine. You have so much more power locked up inside you that you could easily use mine so much more violently and controllably that you could...’ He stopped when I had put my finger on his lips, forcing a frown on my face.

   ‘And you know how much I hate being told that. I don’t care about that kind of stuff, besides I can easily just take over if I liked but I won’t because that will just make me as bad as them and I will refuse to do any such stuff that is required of me just so the rest of them can talk behind my back and blatantly go against everything I say. But trust me, Mike, giving me your name isn’t the best thing you could do. It requires the most sacred secret of us and entrusting it in the hands of another vampire; if ever she took me over again then you’d better be sure that you could take me or that you’re other half has taken over too. I don’t want that kind of valuable information stuck in my head that I could hurt myself with despair of using it for evil ways, whether intentional or not.’ I think that was about the longest I’ve ever spoken non-stop to him since we first re-united.

   Through it all he just knelt there; soft smile, tilted head, hands on lap, taking it all in but something told me he had still decided on it even after all of what I had just said. ‘Still it doesn’t seem so bad to me, you know. I know yours, and I haven’t used it for evil ways, as you put it.’

   ‘Yet.’

   ‘No, I won’t ever use it for that. Nor will I use it to tie you to me and feel like if you ever left me that I would use it to pin you down and hurt you for your unfaithfulness. Sorry for any harsh words,’ he apologised. ‘I wouldn’t and couldn’t do that. So to me, going back to my point, if I haven’t used it that way then surely you won’t either. So I’ve decided to tell you it.’ A smug smile settled on his face and something in my head and the way that he sat there told me he wasn’t going to budge from that decision.

   I sighed heavily, dropped my head, and stared into my lap. ‘On your own head be it; but you know that my other half is a lot more violent than any other’s is to them. What I have inside me is like a hundred years of patron blood that even I couldn’t control if I starved myself for long enough. Even though I can’t feel her now and I can’t feel her mind and intentions, I can’t be sure whether she’d use your name against you. I wish you could understand that your name is the one I can’t know above any other. You can trust me all you like, but her, not one bit.’ I paused from running out of breath.

    Shuffling closer to me, he put his lips to my ear and breathed in so softly that it drew the air over my skin. My lungs emptied, gasping as I felt him utter his real name to me. Inside my chest and mind I felt a wreathing, slithering sensation that made me grit my teeth behind my lips; my hands fisted themselves as I forced my voice to stay inside my throat. After my body had unlocked itself from that sudden tensioning moment, I looked over to him and saw that he still wore his dark smirk on his lips.

   ‘What’s so amusing?’ I asked hastily, and in a much too snappy way.

   A small chuckle and he rolled his head on his neck, almost snake-like. ‘Oh, nothing, my sweet.’ And before I could make another word, he had grabbed around my back and waist and pulled me strongly into him. That dark smile of his was still on his lips, and I wondered what he had on his mind; so, naturally, I narrowed my eyes and curled the corners of my lips upwards and portrayed the same darkness in my features as he had on his. ‘Ha, that won’t work. In fact it only makes me feel more bad for making you do that.’ I didn’t make an amused expression, but my evilness still stayed etched on my lips and eyes. ‘Mmm, you look so beautiful with that darkness there.’ His fingers brushed through my hair and then gripped it just above my neck. ‘Am I hurting you?’ he asked carefully.

   My hands gripped his upper arms. ‘No,’ I replied, in a rather husky voice. ‘Are you going to hurt me?’

   He shook his head, pouting his lips up to one side and his eyes closed. ‘No, of course not. Would I ever? Hehe, nah. Just teasing you like this gives me a bit of an edge.’ His lips resumed their previous shape.

   I thought for a few seconds. ‘Teasing? Mike, this is more than teasing.’ And on that last syllable, I leapt forward into him and jammed my lips onto his. Somehow the feeling of him being able to physically overpower me had grown to a point where I didn’t care what happened and I just wanted him to take me more than ever as his.

   Although we kissed, our lips were tensed and our teeth bore a little; as his fingers gripped my hair still, mine slithered up his back and neck and clamped into his short locks. My other nails had found their way to his shoulder and they dug into his skin rather deeply. His body shook as I scratched down his arm and my body arched itself as I now lay under him as he in turn kissed down my neck and bit into the skin that covered my collar bone.