Spiderpaw kept a tight grasp of the goldenrod between his jaws as he entered carefully beneath the thorn tunnel into the CedarClan camp. The sun was setting, and Spiderpaw couldn't wait to curl up besides Oceanfur and shut his eyes. He had spent the whole day going in and out of camp, searching for emergency herbs for the Clan as he had been told. But although Oceanfur had been hunting with him this morning for herbs, he missed his comfort, although he knew that one cat had to be in the medicine cat's den at all times with a sick cat, especially one that had grown much worse in such a short time. He couldn't even picture Ashpaw's infection anymore. The way his skin bled and juices escaped his leg made Spiderpaw sick.
However his stomach rumbled at the thought of a nice, warm bird waiting for him as he entered. Muskstar had known he wouldn't be keen on the Clan's usual meals, consisting of frogs and other reptiles. Spiderpaw respected the way she had gone out every morning and caught Spiderpaw separate prey, despite how hard the hunting was as she had only ever been taught to stalk in the darkest forest. Spiderpaw had only began to realise how much CedarClan seemed to welcome him, how much he was needed there, and how respected he was for simply carrying out his duties. Although, Spiderpaw knew he liked things here, and he would not have things differently even if the choice was offered to him. Although he could never trust Rocktail in countless moons, the deputy seemed to dismiss him, knowing that if Spiderpaw wasn't there to help Oceanfur with his duties, Ashpaw may have not been in good condition.
Spiderpaw flinched as a thorn pierced his tail as he pulled himself up, shaking the dirt from his pelt. He turned over to remove the thorn, but the pain dug deeper when he was shocked by a voice suddenly speaking to him.
"Finally, you're back."
Spiderpaw immediately recognised Mothspring's voice. He was annoyed that she had shocked him, lodging the thorn deeper into his tail, but he bit his tongue when he sensed worry in Mothspring's eyes.
"What's the matter?" he asked, still turning around in attempt to get the thorn out of his pelt. "Did Jaggedclaw speak to Muskstar?"
Mothspring nodded quickly, her tall figure bending down towards Spiderpaw's view. "I know you're in pain, but the ceremony is on right now." Her voice tightened as if she had a lump in her throat. "You need to come. Muskstar is waiting for you."
"For me?" Spiderpaw spoke. "Why me?"
Mothspring leaned herself up, and as Spiderpaw felt a sensation of relief as he pulled out the thorn, he met her gaze. However Mothspring simply let out a heavy load of air. "Just come," she meowed impatiently.
Spiderpaw followed her, quickly picking up the herbs he had put down to remove the thorn. He picked up his pace as he noticed Mothspring accelerating. He knew he wouldn't want to miss Ashpaw's ceremony, knowing how joyous he would be able to become knowing that once he was healed, he would be free to learn the ways of a warrior.
Spiderpaw nearly lost sight of Mothspring. The camp was so dark, and the trees covering the stars above made the camp so dull he could barely see her tail. However, he knew the camp in and out now, he was able to quickly catch up to the cat, knowing the exact way she would be going, although her footsteps were light and inaudible.
Spiderpaw hurled to a stop as Mothspring approached the camp. He felt his heart crack as he heard the wail of a cat nearby. "Is Jaggedclaw still upset?"
Mothspring said nothing, she simply met Spiderpaw's gaze before looking forwards to enter through the lichen, so silent he could hear the vines swishing after her, between the wails of the cat he was hearing. He quickly followed her in, but he dropped his herbs when he caught sight of the interior of the medicine cat's den.
The smell of smoke entered him like a wildfire. He could see flames, although they were not spreading around the den. Instead there seemed to be several small fires made around the den, which gave light to the many bodies of cats circled around for the ceremony. He knew Ashpaw would be too weak to make his way to Muskstar's den, where ceremonies were usually held, but the scent of smoke was so unwelcoming he couldn't help longing for the ceremony to be outside. He felt constantly reminded of his dream, the scents triggering him back to the omen he had received back in ThornClan. 'Only one can prevent the ash from bringing back the darkest flame,' he had heard.
His light had adjusted, and Spiderpaw intertwined his way through the bodies until he found a small space besides Oceanfur. He noticed the medicine cat beckoned him over with his tail, not moving his eyes from his feet. With a break in his heart, he finally realised why.
Ashpaw was still.
Spiderpaw couldn't believe what his eyes had lead him to. Ashpaw looking as stiff as a boulder was an understatement. His body was laying twisted over a layer of green leaves. His eyes were so dull, he could no longer recognise the colour they had previously shown. His leg had gone from the gnarly pink of infected fur to black. Spiderpaw felt he could no longer look at him - but the despair in the apprentice's face seemed to long for something Spiderpaw could not tell.
Every cat was silent, including the wailing cat behind the corner. Spiderpaw could barely see Jaggedclaw, hunched over besides Mothspring. She was so quiet. Spiderpaw knew she couldn't have been the cat wailing.
Even Rocktail's heavy face looked down. Pinepelt and Longfoot, the cats which seemed to be his closest allies sat either side of him. Spiderpaw noticed that Pinepelt was leaning on him with sadness in his eyes - but the deputy seemed to have so much respect for him that he wasn't trying to remove him, simply letting his tail wrap around the stub at his rear, as if he was his own kit.
Muskstar's voice was cracked.
"I ask my warrior ancestors to look down on this apprentice," she began. Spiderpaw suddenly heard small footsteps coming from behind him, and he realised that Ashpaw's sister, Blackpaw had been the cat wailing around the corner. His heart heaved for her. He didn't want to imagine the pain of losing a sibling. And she had none left.
"He has learned the ways of a medicine cat, but has found his true self would have lied with learning the ways of a warrior. Ashpaw has given up his life in the service of his Clan. Let StarClan receive him no longer as a medicine cat, but as a warrior's apprentice."
No cat uttered a word. Muskstar dipped her head, and suddenly every cat stood up, forming a neat line that wrapped around the medicine cat den. Pinepelt was the opposite side of Muskstar to Ashpaw, and Spiderpaw noticed that each cat had the opportunity to murmur a few words of farewell to the apprentice.
Spiderpaw noticed that Rocktail took considerably longer than Pinepelt - but Spiderpaw couldn't blame him. He didn't want to admit to himself that maybe now Rocktail would feel the pain of losing a kit - he felt too guilty to think anything of the sort.
Before he knew what to say, his turn had come to speak to Ashpaw. Although there were no words planned, his speech came tumbling out of him as if he knew his speech word by word.
"You would have been a brave warrior," he began, in a whisper so quiet he was convinced that not even Ashpaw would be able to hear him. "You did not deserve to endure the pain you did. You had the potential to become a bright and caring cat, and joining StarClan shall never prevent that. I hope you find peace up there, and I'm thrilled to think of you enjoying the experience of running through a field without a care, once again."
He knew he couldn't have taken much longer. He followed the way Rocktail and his cats had left, his tail dragging behind him.