Trinity

"Thanks for...everything,"I said softly. "I haven't had this much fun since freshman year."

He nodded, agreeing with what I was saying. I looked over at him as he looked at me. A slight smile grew on his face as I tried to look away.

He was so fine.

"You know I got you, Shawty,"He responded. "You know I see so much of them in you."

"Them?"I asked.

"Jada...Renaé,"He mumbled.

"I'm not going to kill myself or anything like that Warr-"

He sighed loudly, interrupting my sentence. I could tell he was getting annoyed. I knew his sister's death was a touchy topic for him, but I was still curious about this Renaé person.

"Shawty that's the problem. You act like you okay, and then a few hours later you're in the park 'bout to over dose. That shit is not okay. You are not okay."

"Warren, I was just going through a hard time. I wasn't actually going to take the p-"

"No disrespect, but I can't deal with you right now. You're acting like nothing is wrong with you, when you were 'bout to fall over a fucking ledge today Trinity. How are you good? How the fuck are you okay when you were-"He pinched his fingers together, "this close to dying today? Huh?"

"You're overreacting. I'm fine."

"Get out my car, Shawty."

"War-"

"Please...before I say some shit I might regret."

The look on his face was serious. He didn't even make eye contact with me. He was looking the other way, but I saw his reflection in the mirror. It was so grim, so hateful. I couldn't imagine him looking at me like that.

I grabbed all of the few belongings I had. My phone, my clothes from yesterday, and the new shoes he bought me from Target.

As I opened the door, he told me good night. His words were so bland, I wouldn't have thought he even meant it. If anything, I'm sure he wanted for me to have a bad night

Quickly, I tried to rush into the house. I found the spare key under the vase outside, and stuck it into the back door. Once I was inside, I tried to sneak up the stairs, but the sudden shine of a flash light blinded my eyes.

"Trinity Kerr Moore, where the hell have you been?"Mommy shouted.

I paused in my footsteps. The last thing I imagined was getting in trouble with my parents, even though it should've been the first thing I was worried about.

"I've been staying at Nya's house. We had a really big project."

She sighed, "Mmm, Nya and her parents said the same thing as well. That's better where your ass had been."

"I promise it was Mommy. This project counts towards our midterms, and I can't fail that right?"

"Yeah, whatever. Eli has been sleeping on the couch. What happened between y'all two?"

I rolled my eyes dramatically. The last person I wanted to see was him. He was the devil himself, and needless to say the devil is the root of all my problems.

"Nothing Mommy. I just needed some space."

"I hope this isn't about him cheating. I told you about that Trinity. He's a high school boy, and he will do what high school boys do best. You just have to-"

"Stick by his side,"I said, finishing her sentence. "I know, Mommy. I know."

"That's my baby,"She said as she kissed my forehead "I'm off to bed. I have an early start tomorrow."

"Goodnight,"I replied as she turned and walked away.

I pulled my shoes off of my feet, and dropped the rest of my belongings on the kitchen table.

He was laid out on the couch, in a deep sleep. He was the deepest sleeper I've ever known besides Lila. The world could explode, and he'd still be sound asleep.

"Eli,"I whispered yelled.

The rest of my family was sleeping, and the last thing I wanted was to hear them complain in the morning.

"Eli!"I said.

I pushed his head, and he rolled over, looking at me. Once he noticed it was me, he quickly sat up and rubbed his eyes.

A smile came across his face, but then it faded once he saw how upset I was.

"Get the fuck out of my house Elijah."

"Baby, list-"

"Do you not understand English?"I asked.

I signed the words Get Out in ASL. Eli and I took American Sign Language our sophomore year, and it was one of the best decisions I made.

"Trinity, stop acting like a bitch, and just listen to me. I'm trying to be nice about this, but you're testing my patience."

"You know what, I'm not even doing this with you,"I mumbled.

I grabbed my belongings off of the table, and walked up the stairs towards my room. Surprisingly, he didn't follow.

I shut my door, and fell backwards onto my bed. Something seemed off about it. I pulled back the comforter set and saw all of Lila's toys still in my bed.

I took a deep breath, and started it remove everything. The one thing I wanted was a good nights sleep in my bed.

Nothing seemed to go my way anymore.

The door to my room opened. I already knew who it was. I continued throwing Lila's toys to the side of the room.

"Trinity, I love you and I want to be with you forever. You have to work with me, babe. I'm not perfect. I've never been perfect."

I continued to ignore him. He didn't deserve a response, let alone any emotion from me at all.

"Trinity,"He said again.

His arms snaked around my waist. He placed his head in the crook of my neck, and gave me soft kisses.

"Eli,"I said sternly. "Get the fuck off of me."

I tried to pry his arms off of me, but he had a strong hold around me. He kept placing kisses on my neck, and worked his way up to my jawbone. I moved my head in the other direction. He let go of my waist with one hand, and placed it around my neck.

"Trinity, cut the bullshit. We're staying together, and you're going to love me like I love you."

"Eli,"I managed to say even though I could barely speak.

His grip around my neck tightened, and I gasped for breath.

"You love me, right?"He whispered in my ear.

I tried to fight back the tears that were coming out of my eyes, but I just couldn't. My body started to feel heavy, and I knew if I didn't say anything, everything would just be a lot worse.

I nodded my head the best I could. He loosened his grip on my neck.

"Say it."

"I love you, Eli."

***

Soft giggles woke me up from my sleep. I rubbed my eyes as I sat up in my bed. Eli and Lila sat at the end of my bed, playing with her toys.

"Hi Monkey,"She said as she used her dolls hand to wave. "Now you say, "Hi, Tina. How are you?"

"What's up Tin-"

"No, say hi. It's more better."

A smile came upon my face as I watched them play. Lila continued to make Eli say certain things, but he seemed to enjoy it.

Eli always loved working with kids, especially my siblings. They love him over here. I don't blame them, because he's the best when it comes to them.

He always took Owen wherever he needed to go. He took Myles to his baseball practices. He also watched my youngest brother, Tyler, a lot.

Owen was the second oldest, after me. Now it's his job to take care of the household while our parents work. He hates it, but he puts up with it. Myles and Lila don't cause him too much trouble. The one thing he cannot tolerate is Tyler. Tyler is rounding off his terrible twos, but it seemed like he was going to go into his terrible threes.

Myles is very out of the picture. He doesn't do much with us. He's usually staying at a friends house, going to baseball practice, or away from home. Daddy is really hard on him. Myles is considered the soft one of the family, meaning he's the cry baby. Daddy wants him to toughen up, but it's just not in him. Myles hates home, and I don't blame him.

"Trin!"Lila shouted. "Eli is playing dollies with me. Can you play? Pretty please?"

"Lila, I just woke up. I need to go get ready for sc-"

"Oh, come on,"Eli interrupted. "School is in like two hours from now."

I grabbed my phone off of my dresser and saw the time was 5:30 am. I sighed loudly, upset they had woke me up so early. I guess it wasn't a bad thing. I did need to get ready for school, and try to scrub the smell of alcohol off of me.

Eli threw one of her dolls into my lap. It was the one she named Trinity after me. She did resemble me a lot. She had an Afro, short nose, and huge ears. I was the one that gave the name suggestion.

"Hi Trinity, did El-I mean Monkey tell you how much he loves you today?"

"He told me enough last night,"I responded.

"Why didn't you say it back?"

"Guys, that's not what they're supposed to say,"Lila announced while she tried to hold her doll in the middle.

"Maybe because I think it's bullshit."

"So my love is bullshit now? You don't love me anymore?"

"Of course I love you. You just love yourself more than you love me, and that's bullshit."

"Trin, Eli?"Lila asked. "You guys aren't playing nicely."

"How are you going to tell me who I love?"Eli said strongly. "I break my neck, working every single day for you. I pay for your cheer. I watch your siblings when you can't. I'm always there for you, no matter the occasion. I don't even spend holidays with my fucking family for you!"He shouted.

Lila jumped off of the bed and started to grab all of her toys. If it wasn't for the fact her doll was being snatched out of my hand, I wouldn't have even noticed.

"Lila, baby girl st-"

"I'll just go play dollies by myself. You guys fight like mommy and daddy."

"Fight?"Eli and I said at the same time.

"Mommy and daddy don't fight,"I said. "They've never fought."

Lila nodded her head, "Yes, they do. They fight when you're not here."

Eli sighed. He stood up and grabbed some of the toys from her hands, and picked her up. She rested her head on his shoulder.

"I think it's time for you to go back to bed, princess. You have to go to school in a few hours, and you don't want to be tired, do you?"

"But I want to play!"She cried. "Please...."

She gave him her infamous puppy eyes. I rolled my own, knowing he would give in. He could never resist her puppy dog eyes. They were to cute to resist.

"How about this, after school I take you and Trin on a picnic at the park? We can play on the monkey bar-"

"We can go down the slide!"She exclaimed. "Okay, I'm going to bed right now!"

Eli laughed as she jumped out of his arms and ran to her room. I laughed too. She was cute in every possible way, but needless to say she was very bad.

Eli followed her to her room, I'm assuming to tuck her in. I got out of my bed and started my morning routine.

Once I finished straightening up my room a little, I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth. It's been too long since I've seen my very own toothbrush, and I know my teeth were begging for it.

I quickly got into the shower and out. I wanted to make breakfast for my family, considering I've been gone for too many days at once.

I threw on the nicest outfit I could find, a white tank top with some white shorts. Although it was nearing October, the weather was still scorching. I couldn't wait for the winter months to come.

Eli opened the door as I slid the shirt over my head. He didn't even pay any attention to me. He grabbed his wallet and walked back towards the door.

The nosey in me turned my head to see what he was doing. Owen stood at the door, very dressed for school. He had his backpack on his shoulder, and everything about his appearance looked nice.

I looked at my watch and noticed the time was 5:55 am. Owen didn't have to go to school until 8:45, so something was not adding up.

"You sure you don't need a ride?"Eli asked as he opened up his wallet.

He pulled out, not one, but three condoms and handed them to Owen. My mouth fell agape as I watched Owen take them.

"Nah, she just live right down the street,"Owen said as he shoved them into his pocket. "Her friend will drop us off at school."

"You still have the pill I gave you, right?"

"What pill?"I said speaking up. "Are you giving my brother drugs? Eli, you must b-"

"Trinity,"Eli said. "I'm talking to your brother."

"You must've lost you-"

Eli walked out of the room, and shut the door behind him. I was livid, but I knew if I went out there it would be even worse.

I decided to take pictures of myself, because it's been a long time since the world had seen me. I put my phone on the stand, and posed on my bed. The phone clicked a few times, and I smiled.

Once it was done, I grabbed the phone and looked at the pictures. I decided which one was best.

Trinwantsmoore29: I been praying for myself like you used to, embracing myself like you do too 🤍

Once I hit post, the likes started to flow in. Everything felt whole again once I did that.

Eli walked back into the room, and fell backwards into my bed. He scooted up some so his head was in my lap.

"It's a plan b pill, Trinity."

"You're condoni-"

"Babe, we were the same age as him when we first had sex."

"I wish you would stop interrupting me,"I said annoyed.

I pushed him off of me and got off of my bed. I grabbed my phone to see how many more likes had came in: 300 more. A smile grew on my face, but I quickly fixed it when Eli sat up on the bed.

"I don't like hearing you say dumb shit."

"Eli, get the fuck out of my house,"I said sternly. "Please, just please. I have to fix breakfast, and go to school early so I can pick up my missed assignments."

He reached over and grabbed some papers off of my desk. He flung them across the room, and they scattered everywhere.

"You would think you would appreciate me after all I do for you,"He mumbled. "You're welcome."

"I hate you,"I thought to myself.

But instead I said, "Sorry, baby...I love you, a lot."

He stood up, kissed my forehead, and went into the bathroom. I sighed and started to pick up all of the papers on the floor.

My phone pinged on my bed.

1 new message from Warren
Received at 6:05 AM

See you after school?

I smiled. After last night, I thought he would've been upset with me. Even though I did nothing wrong, I still felt bad.

Send to Warren
Delivered at 6:06 AM

Yes! Where?

Immediately he sent a text back. The smile on my face grew even bigger.

1 new message from Warren
Received at 6:06 AM

That's a surprise shawty. Come to my car after school. Make it quick too

I fell in love with such simples words. I found myself smiling way to much at my phone.

***

As I walked into school, I was met with numerous stares. People held pointed and giggled as I walked through the hallway.

Caught off guard, I just smiled and waved back. It was my first day back at school, so I wasn't surprised so many people were intrigued with me.

Eli tightened his grip on my hand. I gave him a gentle squeeze back, letting him know everything was okay.

It was no different than any other day. Eli and I arrived at school thirty minutes early to catch up with some friends. The hallways were crowded with teenagers hugged up and gossiping about God knows what.

As we approached Nya and Kim, Nya quickly stuffed her phone into her locker and slammed it shut. Kim stood beside her, looking worried.

"Hi!"I exclaimed. "It's been like what...two day-"

"Fuck Eli Bearden,"Someone shouted from the other side of the hallway.

I looked up at him, and he shrugged his shoulders. I'm sure it was just a joke.

"Fuck Eli Bearden!"Some of kids shouted.

Eli looked down at me, just as confused as I was. I was just as confused.

Soon, the whole hallway started chanting Fuck Eli Bearden. I looked around, and everyone was staring at us, like we were a problem.

"What the fuck is going on?"Eli asked. "I'm going to speak to Nathan."

He kissed my forehead, let go of my hand, and walked off to the other side of the hallway.

I crossed my arms and leaned against my locker. Nya gave me a smile, and I knew she did something sinister.

"Nya..."

She showed me a post on her phone.

Central_T2020: Our star of the week comes from Central High School. His girlfriend speaks out about their current situation. #FUCKELIBEARDEN

My mouth fell agape as I snatched the phone from her hands. I started to scroll and see more of the like posts.

I grabbed my phone out of my bag after it started to buzz. My comments were blowing up with the hashtag, and condolences from other girls.

"It's bout time you say that shit,"Kim said. "He ain't shit."

"Where is this?"I asked.

Nya held up the phone to my ear, and I heard myself saying the words I spoke yesterday.

"Fuck Eli Bearden. I hope your kids hate you as much as I do. Much love, your girlfriend."

Eli marched towards me, and he didn't look happy. When he approached me, he snatched my wrist into his hand.

"Nigga, you done lost your fucking mind grabbing her like that..."Nya said.

"Trinity, let's go, now,"He said angrily.

"Kim, hold my fuc-"

"Trinity, I said now!"

He pulled my hand and I was basically being dragged along behind him. Other people in the hallway watched as he pulled me through the double doors.

"Eli,"I begged. "Pl-"

"Stop fucking talking."

I walked in defeat. I should've never been with Warren. I should've never said those things.

Now I was losing the one thing I was guaranteed, Eli's love.