Stevie felt like she had been on the ward for a year, when it had only been two weeks

They put her through a dozen evaluations and kept her on strong tranquilizers. No being allowed any visitors was getting to her.

"Lindsey!" She screamed

"Stevie, I'm going to have to ask you to be quiet..." one of the nurses said

"I want to see him!" She cried, trying to get up

"You know you aren't allowed visits, we go through this every day!"

"Just for a minute!"

"Stevie..."

"Can you call him?"

"Will you stop asking if I do?"

"Yes," she sniffled

The nurse dialed the number for Lindsey's room from the phone in Stevie's

"Hello?" Lindsey answered

The nurse passed the phone to Stevie

"Lindsey?!" Stevie cradled the phone against her ear

"Stevie?" He asked, he hadn't heard from her since that day on the roof

"I needed to hear your voice."

"Umm...how are you?" He said awkwardly

"I miss you, I'm ready to get out of here!"

"Yeah...I don't think you'll be allowed for a bit"

"Are....are you still angry with me?"

"I'm fine Stevie..." she heard him sigh

"Please be honest. I want to make this right."

"Stevie...I just...I feel like I don't know you anymore..."

"I'm still me! You know I am!"

"I looked at you on the roof that day, and you weren't the woman I fell in love with...I didn't know you"

"Do you not love me anymore?" Her voice trembled

"I can't love someone, that I don't recognise..."

"Lindsey I'm still me! I'm still in love with you! I can change!" She begged

"Your in a psych ward Stevie...!"

"Please, wait for me. I will change for you!"

Lindsey was silent on the other end

"It's over?"

"Yes...no...I don't know..." he said truthfully

"You should have let me jump...."

"You have Evie, leaving your child would be selfish"

"Lindsey please, I know that we can work this out!"

"How? I don't know how long your going to be in there for"

"Can you wait for me?"

"I can't wait forever..."

"It won't be forever! Maybe another week! I'm getting better!"

"Okay..."

"I love you."

"I know, Stevie"

Placing the phone down, she curled into a ball and cried

She knew that he didn't love her anymore

"How long until I can leave?" Stevie asked her nurse

"The doctor will be round in a little while, and he might be able to tell you then"

"Please, I need to leave. Can I check myself out?"

"No, you need an approval from the doctor, I'll call him down if you want"

"Please do!"

Within ten minuets, a doctor was down and in Stevie's room

"Please, I want to be released. My fiancé needs me."

"I don't feel like your in an okay place, to be released"

"I am! I promise! I'll be taking care of my daughter and fiancé so I'll be occupied!"

"I would need his approval..."

"Call him! He's a patient here!"

"Okay" he took the room number down, and left to make the call, coming back shortly after

Stevie sat up quickly once he returned, "What did he say? Can I be released?"

"He said no, Stevie..."

"What? C-Can I speak to him?"

Nodding he left her along for a moment to speak to Lindsey

Stevie hit the redial button and waited for him to answer

"Hello?"

"Lindsey, baby, please tell them that I'm okay to leave-that I'll be taking care of you. I'm better, I promise!"

"I don't think you are Stevie, so no, I can't tell them that...I'm sorry"

"Baby, please. I love you!"

"I stood by you when you tried to blow your brains out in front of me!" She added

"And I took a bullet for you, we're even," he spat back

"That's not even the same!" She cried

"I can't let them release you, I'm sorry." He hung up

She tried to phone him back, but he didn't pick up

"Please! You have to release me!"

"We can't...not without his consent"

Stevie began to hit herself in the head, becoming overly upset

Injecting her with a sedative she calmed down, almost into a comatose state

"Evie," she mumbled, remembering her daughters terrified face the last time she saw her in Lindsey's arms

She was in the same state for another month, going through the same things everyday

Lindsey left the hospital, and she was allowed no more phone calls

Her state became worse, having to be strapped down almost at all times as she began to pull her hair and hit herself as well as scratching herself.

After many talks, the doctor decided it would be more healthy for her to be released to a care facility, hospital was making her worse

"I don't want to be here. I want Lindsey and Evie," she growled

"We are releasing you into a 24 hour care facility, it's a place where you will be watched, but also allowed visitors, and day releases, should they see fit"

"I want to go home! I want my family!"

"It's this facility, or you stay here, it's your choice"

"All of you can go to hell."

"So here it is then..." the doctor said

"My new hell....."

"So, we will transfer you to this centre this afternoon"

"Can I call my parents?"

"Of course"

"Hello?"

"Momma?" Stevie immediately cried

"Stevie, is that you?"

"Yes! Mom I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay baby, where are you?"

"They're transferring me to a long term care facility! I'm at the hospital....I tried to kill myself after I hurt you!"

"Tee! Oh my God, I should never have left that day!" Barbara cried

"It's not your fault! Mom I need you to do a favor....."

"Anything sweetheart!"

"Get Evie from Lindsey....he broke up with me."

"Teedee, don't you know?"

"Know what?"

"Lindsey was released from hospital just under a month ago, he dropped Evie and her stuff here, and we haven't seen him since, she calls him but he hangs up when he hears her..."

"W-what? C-can you give me the number?"

"It's the same number as before, but he won't answer"

"He might."

Stevie said her goodbyes to her mother, and dialed Lindsey's number

"What?" He answered, not knowing who it was

"Lindsey, it's me"

"We're over. Let it go."

"How could you do that to your daughter?!"

"That's a crock of shit. You know that you tried to kill yourself and leave her here. Don't even start that bullshit."

"Lindsey, I'd just lost my baby! They were still inside me for fuck sake!"

"They were mine too! Don't make excuses!"

"I killed my own child! How the hell do you think I was coping?!"

"Please don't call me again." He hung up

Stevie cried...he was horrible to her, and she didn't understand

Hours later a team of nurses came in, "It's time, Ms. Nicks."

Collecting her things, she was taken to a car, and driven to her new place of care

"I think you'll like it here. I've heard great things," A young nurse tried to cheer her up on the ride there

Stevie just stared silently out the window, still going over her call with Lindsey, she would try and call him again when she got to her room

"Hey," the nurse touched Stevie's hand softly, causing her to jump, "You'll be alright."

Smiling weakly, she arrived, being shown to her room

The room was a soft pink, the drapes a beige with complementary pillows on the bed.

This place looked much more comfortable than the last, sitting down on her bed she thought it might be alright to stay

"Am I allowed to have candles?" Stevie asked the nurse that was still in her room

"No ma'am I'm sorry. It's a hazard."

"Okay..."

"You have a phone there, and your
allowed to call whoever you want, whenever you want, okay?"

"Are the calls monitored?"

"Yes."

"But we do have occasions when you can ask for them not to be"

"Thank you."

"No problem, I'll leave you be for a while now, let you settle in"

Stevie laid back on the bed, closing her eyes and counting to ten before picking up the phone and dialing Lindsey.

"Hello?"

"Please don't hang up!" She said quickly

"I told you not to phone me again!"

"I'm at the new facility! I already feel so much better! Please just come see me, we need to talk."

"I don't want to see you..."

"Please, I have something to give you. I think you'll want to have it."

"What is it?"

"Our baby's sonogram...."

"What...?" He swallowed hard

"I want you to have her sonogram. You deserve it."

"I...I don't want it..."

"I can't keep looking at it..."

"She was more yours than mine, you keep it"  he told her

"What if you come help me destroy it?"

"No...no don't destroy it"

"I can't keep looking  at her face!"

"Stevie...don't..." his voice cracked

"I know that you still love us! Come to me! Please!"

"I'll come and get the picture, but that's it"

"That's all I ask!"

"I'll be there this evening, give me the address" she did and he hung up

Stevie curled up on the bed, falling into a deep sleep

She was woken by a knocking on the door

"Hello?"

"Stevie, you have a visitor"

Nervousness hit her and she sat straight up, "Come in."

Lindsey walked through the door, smiling at the nurse who closed the door after him

"Hi," she said shyly

"Hello"

"You look good, how is your back?"

"Yeah it's getting there thanks"

"Have a seat," she gestured toward the chair by the bed

Sitting down he jigged his legs up and down

"Have you spoken to Evie lately?"

"No"

"I'm sure she misses you."

"She doesn't need to get used to having me around"

"Why? You know that she loves you."

"We should never have told her that I was her dad"

"She adores you. She loves you more than she loves me."

"She'll forget about me one day" Lindsey sounded so heartless

"What did you say to her in your hospital room?"

"Why?"

"I just was curious."

"I...I told her...that I wasn't her father..."

"Lindsey....how did she react?"

"She cried a lot, she wouldn't believe me at first, I ended up yelling at her...that I didn't love her..."

Stevie broke down, "Life is fucked up. We had three kids together and now we have none."

"Yeah...it certainly did one over on us"

"What do I do? How do I make this right?"

"Nothing...it's just over, we can't go back"

"Will you do me one last favor?"

"Yes?"

"Make love to me, just one last time."

"Steph..."

"Then fuck me if that's too personal. I'll give you the sonogram and you can leave."

He looked at her for a moment before pulling her to him and kissing her

Stevie placed her hands on his cheeks and moved to straddle his waist

Holding her hips, he squeezed, arousing her beyond belief

"Fuck,"sliding onto the floor and unzipping his jeans, pulling him out to stroke

"What are you doing?" He asked

"Trying to give you a blow job," she replied

"You don't have to do that"

"I want to because I know you like it," she kissed the tip

"Shit!" He hissed through clenched teeth

Stevie took him into her mouth and began to deep throat, feeling his hands tangle into her hair

Even though she was Gagging a little, she kept going, trying to give him pleasure

Lindsey propped himself up on his elbows, "Shit, that's good."

Smiling around him, she kept going until she knew he was going to come, when it happened she pushed it into her mouth as far as she could and swallowed every last drop

She stood up and retrieved the sonogram, handing it over to him

He looked at it, and couldn't help his tears

"I picture her looking like you...thank you, Lindsey."

"For what?" He asked

"For coming to see me. You can go," her voice trembled, knowing that she'd probably never see him again or have any visitors unless her parents drove all the way from Phoenix.

"I thought you wanted for me to make love to you?"

"I don't want to make this difficult for you. I don't want you to feel obligated to do this."

Stevie slowly walked toward him

Stevie's breathing labored, holding her arms above her head

Unbuttoning her dress and opening it he placed kisses all along her skin

She moaned softly, running her fingers through his hair

"Linds...use your mouth..." she begged

She felt him kissing down her stomach, reaching her underwear and sliding them off, slowly flicking his tongue

Stevie moaned, she had missed him so much

He held her hips down with his hands, sucking at her

"Linds..." she held his hair in her hand, putting her legs over his shoulders

His arms wrapped around her thighs, burying his head deeper

"Fuck..." Stevie hadn't felt his good in a while

Lindsey crawled back up to her and kissed her slowly, sliding into her

Stevie pushed her forehead to his shoulder and cried

He began to move slowly, placing his elbows on each side of her head

"Lindsey...I love you...I love you...I love you..."

Lindsey closed his eyes tightly and tried not to let his tears fall

"Please...I'm begging you, say it back..."

"I love you."

"Do you mean it?"

"Yes."

Wrapping her arms around his back she pulled him too, her face in his neck and a hand on the back of his head

Lindsey sped up, wrapping his arms under her back

"Lindsey, deeper..." she asked

He sat up on his knees and held her legs up, pumping into her

She didn't for one second take her eyes from his face, trying to memorise every line, every mark

"Fuck," Lindsey tilted back his head, gripping her thighs tightly and pumping faster

Stevie's orgasm took her completely by surprise, she tightened around his member and shook

"Shit! God!" Lindsey gritted as she squeezed around him

"Want me to pull out?" He said quickly

"No," Stevie shook her head, panting rapidly

Speeding up he felt his own release coming, with one final deep thrust he emptied himself completely inside of her

Stevie's eyes rolled back in her head, loving the feeling of him while she was very sensitive

"Lindsey, don't leave me..." she hugged him close

"I have to..."

"You don't...please!" He tried to move but she wrapped every limb she had around him

"Stevie, you have to let go," he said gently, running his fingers through her hair, feeling a bald spot

"Steph...what's that?" He asked worried

"When I get worked up I don't know how to handle it...." him noticing marks on her arms as well

"What are you doing to yourself?" He opened her arms and took them all in

"I can't control my anxiety so I take it out on myself."

"Stephanie..." he fell forwards and held her in his arms

She wrapped her arms around him tightly, "I'm so sorry!"

"Don't be..."

"I'm so stupid!"

"Your not, your just troubled"

Stevie held him against her, trembling as she worked herself up

"Calm down, Stevie..."

She closed her eyes tightly, sinking her fingernails into his arm

Lindsey hissed in pain, but he'd rather it be him, than her

He didn't know what to do, he just slowly laid soft kisses all over her face

"Don't leave..." she asked again

"I'll stay until visiting hours are over."

"Then when will I see you again?"

"I don't know, Steph."

"Please...we can start again, we can try and get David back, we can have a baby, and..."

"Stephanie, you know that isn't realistic."

"Why isn't it?"

"David lives with Jen's sister and you live here."

"I will come out of here, we can all live together, we can finally have our own baby"

"I don't think so, baby."

"Do you not want one..." she asked

"I do, I just have fears..."

"What fears?"

"That you'll miscarry, or we'll break up, other things...."

"I didn't mean to miscarry the last one, it didn't help being thrown across a room...what are, 'other things'"

"Well, just that they could be...like you..." he shrugged

"Excuse me...? Like me how?"

"I mean, you're here."

"So...in other words, crazy?" She asked hurt

"Yeah," he sighed

"How can you say that? Your supposed to be in love with me..."

"I love you."

"Yeah...?"

"That's all."

"You aren't in love with me...?"

"I'm in love with the old you."

"I am me!"

"This isn't you!" Gesturing to the facility room around them

"I'm sick Lindsey, and I need your support!"

"I can't give it to you."

"Why not? Why won't you help me?" She cried

"I'm done. I've moved on."

"Wait...is...is there someone else?"

"I'm marrying Jen's sister..."

"What...?" Stevie's heart stopped

"So I can be with David."

"Are you serious? What about Evie?!"

"I've talked to her when I was in the hospital. It's all taken care of."

"All taken care of? You just throw away your daughter?"

"No, I'm not throwing her away. I just can't take care of her anymore. I can't be there for her."

"Why? Your her father! She worships you"

"Stevie, what do you want me to say?"

"I want you to say you'll be there for our daughter! That you'll be there for your girlfriend!"

"I'll visit Evie. But Stevie, I'm getting married."

"Marry me!" She begged

"I can't."

"How is me here, any different than what you did?"

"I'm leaving," Lindsey turned to walk toward he door

"Don't walk away from me...answer me" she pleaded

Lindsey sighed, "You know what, lets get married."

"What?" She was beyond confused

"Let's get married

"Why have you suddenly changed your mind? Your worrying me..."

"Because I'm frustrated, and if we get married then all this shit will go away."

"What your going to think I'm not crazy?"

She could tell that Lindsey was getting very frustrated

"Baby, just love me, take care of me, support me! That's all I want"

"I'll take you out tomorrow and we can go get married somewhere."

"Okay..." she smiled

Lindsey kissed her forehead and left

Stevie was beyond excited! She would need help to look amazing for her wedding day