Bad idea.

Adi knew this was bad . . . bad idea. Being too close, this close to Zed, was dangerous. She'd be vulnerable, unguarded . . . but had to. They'd be too exposed, too unpredictable.

She knew that the offer was risky for them, but had to. Ngayong alam na niya ang pinagdadaanan nito, hindi na rin niya makalilimutan at hindi siya matatahimik. She could help, of course. She should . . . and she would. It would be a win-win for them, too. Hindi na niya kailangang mag-carpool, hindi na siya mahihirapang maghanap ng sasakyan, at hindi siya male-late.

"When is your midterm exam?" she asked. "Give me the details, the subject, and I'll see what I can do."

She noticed that Zed was a little skeptical, but still told her everything and answered all the questions she asked. Gusto niyang malaman kung saan part ng subject ito hirap. That subject was one of her favorites during her college years.

And she also knew Zed's professor. An excellent lecturer, someone she admired, but a little . . . brutal.

"If we're gonna do this, I need you to be open and honest with me about your academic difficulty. Ayaw kong masayang ang oras nating dalawa," diin ni Adi. "You're gonna have to tell me everything para alam ko kung ano ang gagawin ko. You need to cooperate with me."

Nagsalubong ang kilay ni Adi nang mapansing tumaas ang sulok ng labi ni Zed. Hindi ito nakatingin sa kaniya, diretso lang sa daan habang nakahawak ang kanang kamay sa manibela, at binago ang gear shift.

"Why are you even smiling?" Adi frowned. "Kung hindi ka magseseryoso, bahala ka."

Zed gazed at her and let out a small laugh. "I just didn't expect you'll offer. I mean . . . thank you, pero kumain ka na ba? Let's have dinner. My treat, then let's talk about my problem. Sushi? Thai? Chinese?"

Adi was about to say no, but her stomach rumbled, betraying her. "Your treat? I want steak."

"Yes, ma'am!" Zed gave her a nod.

In no time, they were in a restaurant, eating steak. Bukod sa steak, nag-order din siya ng mashed potato, asparagus, at Ceasar salad. Hindi na siya nahiya. She was so hungry. Pumuwesto sila sa pinakadulong parte ng restaurant kung saan walang masyadong tao habang pinakikinggan niya ang mga sinasabi ni Zed.

"Ayon," yumuko si Zed at umiling, "nakakahiya, pero 'yan ang problema ko. I only have one last chance."

Malalim na huminga si Adi at ibinaba ang tinidor. Pinunasan niya ang bibig ng napkin at uminom ng tubig bago muling tinitigan si Zed. Hindi ito tumitingin sa kaniya at alam niyang hindi ito komportableng sabihin sa kaniya ang lahat, pero naglakas-loob. Desperado na rin siguro.

"There's nothing wrong with admitting you're failing. You're aware, you're trying, and now you're taking a step to progress." She shrugged. "Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday, full ang class ko. I work from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. Tuesday and Friday, 8 a.m. to 1 p.m. That's my schedule."

Inobserbahan inya si Zed na inilabas ang phone at nagsimulang mag-type habang binabanggit ang schedule niya.

"May 8 a.m. class ako ng Wednesday and Friday," sabi nito na ibinaba ang phone sa lamesa. "Hanggang 11 a.m. 3 p.m. onwards . . . basketball practice. Monday and Thursday, 1 p.m. to 3 p.m. ako. Morning ang practice ko nito. Hindi maaapaketuhan ang paghatid-sundo ko sa 'yo."

Tumango si Adi. "So, after classes ko lang kayang mag-commit sa 'yo."

Sa sinabi niya, muling tumaas ang sulok ng labi ni Zed, ngunit wala itong sinabi.

"Nakakainis ka mag-smile." Nagsalubong ang kilay ni Adi. "Wala kang class ng Friday? I'm not sure about Saturday. That's my laundry and cleaning-the-house day. I'm busy. Groceries and all. Sunday, I go home to my parents' house."

"Friday, magco-commit ako sa 'yo." Nakalolokong ngumiti si Zed at kinagat pa ang ibabang labi. "Hintayin kita buong Friday. Friday, I am all yours."

Adi rolled her eyes and continued eating. Pinag-usapan nila ni Zed na magsisimula sila bukas. It was a Thursday and the routine would be Zed picking her up before 7:30 in the morning. Hindi siya puwedeng ma-late sa klase at susunduin naman siya after six.

And everyday, they would allot two hours study session, maximum.

Zed took care of the bill and Adi got themselves an ice cream before going home.

"Asan pala kotse mo?" tanong ni Zed habang naglalakad sila papunta sa parking. "Hindi ko natanong kanina."

"Casa," sagot ni Adi. "Medyo matagal kasi nag-order pa sila ng piyesa. Hinihiram ko rin sasakyan ng daddy ko, pero next week pa raw magiging available."

Tumango si Zed. "Ayos lang 'yan. Ihahatid-sundo na lang kita." Ngumiti ito at tinanguan siya. "Pambayad sa tutor."

"Basta agahan mo lalo sa umaga," paalala niya. "Ayaw kong ma-late. Before 7:30 . . . dapat nasundo mo na 'ko."

"Chicken."

And Zed wasn't kidding. It was 7:15 and Adi was still fixing her hair when he called. Sa harapan ng parking ito ng building naghihintay sa kaniya. Mayroon pa dapat siyang fifteen minutes, pero nagmadali na rin siyang bumaba at nag-decide na sa kotse na mag-aayos ng makeup.

She decided to wear a black straight cut slacks paired with white satin long-sleeve top, but also carried her black blazer just in case.

Kaagad na lumapit ang sasakyan ni Zed sa entrance ng building nang makita siya. Pumasok siya sa loob ng sasakyan at habang inaayos ang seatbelt, patagilid niya itong inobserbahan.

Suot ni Zed ang puting T-shirt na walang kahit na anong print at simpleng itim na athletic shorts. Nakasuot din ito ng baseball cap.

Nagsimula na itong magmaneho at patagilid na tumingin sa kaniya. "Good morning, Miss Adi," nakaloloko itong tumingin. "Coffee mo." Itinuro nito ang coffee cup na nasa gitna nila.

There were two iced coffees in the cupholder. One with her name and the other with just a letter z. She didn't ask, just took the coffee and sipped. It was French vanilla, one of her favorites.

"Send mo sa 'kin email mo mamaya, I'll forward the lesson plan I created last night for you. Naglagay na rin ako ng reading materials," aniya at ibinaba ang sun visor na may salamin para ayusin ang blush niya. "You can read the notes in advance o hintayin mo na lang mamayang gabi."

Tumango si Zed at nakita ng peripheral niyang humikab ito. "Sige, babasahin ko. Thank you." Muli itong humikab.

Mahinang natawa si Adi at nagpatuloy sa pag-ayos ng makeup niya. Sakto lang ang takbo ng sasakyan, medyo bumibilis kapag walang ibang kasabay kaya maaga siyang nakarating sa school. It was just 7:40. At least hindi siya magmamadaling maglakad.

"Message kita mamaya kapag nasa gate na 'ko," sabi ni Zed na nakatitig sa kaniya. Mahabang katahimikan bago nagsalubong ang kilay nito.

Bumaba ang tingin nito sa labi niya bago ibinalik ang tingin sa mata niya, sa buhok, at pati na rin sa damit.

"Ganda mo," seryosong sambit ni Zed na hindi inalis ang titig sa kaniya. "Ano'ng gusto mong dinner mamaya?"

Umiling si Adi at kinuha binuksan ang pinto ng sasakyan. "Thanks for the ride. Huwag kang ma-late mamaya, please. Ayaw kong naghihintay nang matagal dito sa school."

"Yes, ma'am." Sumaludo si Zed at ngumiti.

Nang tuluyang makababa si Adi, hindi muna umalis si Zed sa harapan ng gate ng university. Hinintay muna niya itong tuluyang makapasok sa loob ng university. Nakita niya kung paano ito ngumiti sa guard, sa estudyanteng nakasabay, at kung paano rin sumama ang tingin nang mapansing nandoon pa siya.

Bumaba ang tingin niya sa phone nang mag-ring iyon at nakita ang pangalan ni Adi. Kaagad niyang sinagot habang nakatingin sa gate kung saan ito nakatayo.

"Bakit?" tanong ni Zed at inilibot ang tingin sa sasakyan. "May naiwan ka?"

"Wala. Why aren't you leaving?" tanong nito sa mababang boses. "Leave now."

Bumaba ang tingin ni Zed sa manibela at mahinang natawa. "Ayoko nga. Kapag hindi na kita nakikita, aalis na 'ko."

"What?" Medyo tumaas ang boses ni Adi. "Zared, Leave."

Zed bit his lower lip while smiling, he chuckled. "Ulitin mo nga," he teased. "Gagi, sarap pakinggan."

He was startled when he heard a knock. It was Adi knocking his car window annoyingly.

"Bakit?" Zed didn't open the window. "Drink your coffee, Audrey. Aga-aga, masungit ka. Ganiyan ba talaga kayong professors?"

"Hindi ako masungit na professor!" singhal nito ngunit mahina ang boses. "Sa 'yo lang. Umalis ka na."

Zed stared at Adi, smiling. "Oo na. Pumasok ka na." His smile faltered. "Aalis ako kapag nasa loob ka na ng campus."

Adi didn't say a word, but looked defeated. "Umalis ka na."

"Oo nga." Zed laughed. "Ayaw maniwala. Sige na. Aalis na 'ko."

Siya na mismo ang nagpatay ng tawag. Nasa sidewalk pa rin si Adi, nasa tabi ng sasakyan niya nang paandarin niya ang sasakyan. Mula sa side mirror, nakita niya itong nanatiling nakatayo kung saan niya iniwan, nakatingin sa papalayong sasakyan niya.

Mabigat ang loob niya dahil nahihiya siya. Pinag-isipan niya kagabi na parang gusto niyang huwag nang ituloy ang pagpapaturo. Ihahatid-sundo pa rin niyang walang kapalit, huwag lang nitong makita ang kabobohan niya.

Zed pressed the play button from the steering wheel and played the first song. It was Nobela by Join the Club and his mood immediately . . . dropped. Despite the caffeine, he felt low.

Adi's scent lingered. It was supposed to be calming. The scent was smooth, not too sweet, but addicting . . . but the thought of Adi seeing his vulnerability made him feel uneasy.

Nilakasan niya ang tugtog habang nagmaneho papunta sa kung saan. Hindi niya alam kung ano ang mararamdaman, kung nakabababa ba bilang lalaki ang mangyayari. He used to be so confident, but not this time.

Hiya ang nararamdaman niya ngunit kung paiiralin niya ang hiya at paninindigan ang taas ng ego niya, mawawala sa kaniya ang lahat.

Puwede naman siyang mag-draft professionally, but he wanted to complete his college career without issues. He worked hard for this and Adi would be his last hope.

Bumaba ang tingin niya sa phone, saglit na tinitigan ang oras. It was almost eight o'clock in the morning . . . and his phone lit up.

Audrey Zorell
Thank you for dropping me off.
Thanks for the coffee, too.
By the way, sharing this to you.

Zed looked down, smiled, and started typing.

Zed Almazan
kakilig

Audrey Zorell
🙄

—
T H E X W H Y S 
www.thexwhys.com