// BLURRY FACE WAS RANKED #225 IN FANFIC OMG GUYS I FEEL ACCOMPLISHED IN LIFE

ps: new covers, yay or nay? //

dan

Dan is getting worse.

Well, he isn't but his parents sure are. And inevitably, that effects him. What used to make Dan feel better no longer work. His friends lift his spirits momentarily, but they can't be with him twenty for hours a day.

It's not just his parents though, Dan just feel off. He just has this twisted feeling inside his gut telling him that something is going to happen, that something is wrong.

Dan looks down at his sketchbook, where he has another sketch of Phil. In the picture, Phil is just looking down at his phone, but he has the softest hint of a smile on his lips.

It's tricky to draw Phil, because as soon as Dan makes one tiny error so that it changes the face, it turns blurry again. At least that way Dan knows if he's doing it right or not though.

Although it's been quite a while, he still does miss Phil. He thinks of him every day, and god he misses his eyes the most. Dan's drawings just don't do them justice.

Dan hears the front door open. His mother is already home, so his father must have just gotten home as well. Dan groans, reaching over and picking up his phone, plugging in his noise canceling headphones and scrolling through his music, looking for the loudest songs he can find.

'They're gonna clean up your looks with all the lies and the books to make a citizen out of you...'

Dan is beginning to hear some yelling and screaming, but the chorus is approaching so that should drown them out... Hopefully.

'TEENAGERS SCARE THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME!'

The yelling is replaced with the music. Satisfied, Dan turns back to his drawing and continues it. He's trying to just ignore his parents, praying that it will all just go away even though he knows it won't - and it seemingly never will.

He just wants them to give up, to just stop. They're obviously not happy together, and their constant fighting and neglect for their son has - and still is - really effected Dan. He wants to let them see that. A drunken collapse obviously wasn't enough. Dan has ditched the rehab now anyway, he's basically over it.

To make them really listen, he'd have to do something drastic. And soon enough, Dan will go over the edge just enough to finally loose his mind. If his parents refuse to end their fighting, Dan might just end himself instead.

Dan's life never meant that much to him anyway. His life is fucked anyway; no faces, a shitty family, a drinking problem - to name a few.

He just knows that he can't keep going on like this. There's nothing in his life which is keeping him stable, keeping his sanity. Even when he pictures Phil's eyes, it doesn't work - they're growing blurry as well and it's making him panic. [! at the disco]

What if Phil's face is blurry if Dan ever sees him again? His eyes in Dan's memory are blurring, but is that only because he hasn't seen them in so long?

Dan sighs, looking back down at his paper, where Phil is smirking up at him. Phil could be anywhere now, he could be dead and Dan wouldn't even know. He wishes that his life could be simple. Dan wishes for a lot of things actually, but if he could have one wish right now;

He'd wish for Phil to be right here with him, helping him to chase away the dark.

***

Dan sits in class, tapping his pen on his desk, probably annoying the hell out of Pj - who's beside him - but he's seriously beyond caring.

He's got a lot on his mind - too much really. He doesn't know what's wrong with him, his emotions have been going haywire recently. Or maybe it's just his brain playing tricks on him, he can't exactly tell.

Dan sighs, trying to pay attention to what the teacher is saying, but he just can't. He taps his pen faster, his foot tapping, making an irregular beat.

"Mr Howell would you please stop tapping, this is not a drumming lesson," Mr Hays says sharply, turning and shooting a glare at Dan.

"I-I'm sorry sir, I can't help it," Dan says, which is the truth, he can't.

He feels nervous for some reason. He feels so wound up he's going to implode with emotions. He feels trapped, scared, as if he's in a dark room and the walls are slowly getting smaller around him, or as if someone is sucking the air out of the room.

"Sir, can I please go to the bathroom?" Dan asks.

"Well, fine just-" he starts, but Dan has already ran out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

He runs down the corridor, his footsteps echoing around the hall. He slows and walks back when he passes his old English classroom again. As he looks into the empty classroom, his fingers curl into tight fists.

The anxiety inside him is growing, although he's not exactly sure why. All he knows is that he needs a way to release it all, so he does. He walks into the classroom, slamming the door behind him and then he walks over to the desk he shared with Phil, kicking it over.

But that's not enough.

He starts knocking over all the tables, throwing the stupid, plastic chairs, trashing the whole room until he hears a yell, but it's far away. The handle is moving, but Dan locked the door. It stops - someone must've gone to get the key. Dan can see people trying to peer in through the window on the door, but their empty, blurred faces just make him feel worse.

Dan stands there, breathing heavily for a few moments, his mind and heart racing so quickly he cannot process a single thing in this instant.

But then a pain erupts from his stomach, twisting and burning violently. White, hot pain curls through his body. Dan grips his stomach, falling to his knees, curling into a ball in the middle of the mess.

And he stays there, crying, never wanting to get up again.

***

phil

Phil stands at the edge of the alley, looking down into its dark, murky depths.

He doesn't particularly want to walk down there, especially considering what he's going to say to the most dangerous guy down there. But he has to, he isn't worth much anyway.

He's spent his life being an asshole to everyone, abusing those who loved him, snapping at those who only wanted to help. He doesn't deserve his life anyway. He just hopes that after this, perhaps Dan will be spared, so he can go live his life happily with his friends, maybe even a new love...

Phil shakes off the thought, taking a step, the darkness engulfing him. The buildings on either side of the alley are too tall, preventing the sunlight from reaching the concrete floor below, which is always damp because of that and the dripping pipes.

Phil doesn't flinch when he accidentally steps in a puddle, splashing water all over his left shoe and up the sides of his jeans. He just looks forward and keeps moving. He doesn't care.

Finally, he reaches the corner, where Shane will be around the other side. Phil closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, mustering up all the courage he can find and he steps out into the open. He looks up to see Shane.

"Phil, what a lovely surprise," Shane says with a sneer, taking a step towards him, "come to tell me anything?"

"Why do you have to keep bothering me Shane?" Phil asks with a sigh, "why couldn't you just leave me be? I would've left you alone and you know that."

"How could I possibly know that Phil? This world you dragged yourself into, that we live in, isn't safe Phil," Shane says, "you don't get where I am by trusting people. That's how you get destroyed."

"You knew how desperate I was to get out," Phil says, "you know I would've done anything."

"Even call the police," Shane says, "you are the only suspect I have Phil. So if it wasn't you, who was it?"

"It could've just been anyone walking by," Phil says, "anyone could've been walking by, or been around."

"Careful what you say Phil, lies will only get you and your boy killed," Shane says, stepping closer and pulling out a knife, the blade somehow glinting menacingly in the dim alley.

"What do you want Shane?" Phil asks tiredly, taking a step back.

"I want to know who's a threat to me," Shane says, taking a step forwards, being closer to Phil than he'd have liked.

"Why?"

Shane laughs, not a happy laugh, almost an insane sort of laugh, and looks down, running his fingers over the silver blade of the knife. He looks back up at Phil, his eyes almost glowing.

"Why do you think Phil? Now stop stalling, I know you didn't come here for a chat," Shane says.

"Well, I did. Nice chatting with you," Phil says, turning to walk away, but Shane grabs his shirt and pins him against the wall, the tip of the knife digging into the tip of his throat.

Fear rises in Phil's stomach, but he pushes it aside and looks straight into Shane's eyes.

"Tell me who it was Phil," Shane snarls in his face.

"I-" Phil stammers, taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, gathering all the courage he can.

He thinks of Dan, his warm, sad brown eyes, his dimple when he smiles, how he made Phil feel like he was someone, and he could mean something. Picturing Dan in his mind, Phil opens his eyes and looks straight at Shane.

"It was me Shane," Phil says smoothly.

"I knew it," Shane snarls.

"Do you really want a murder on your hands as well?" Phil asks, his hands and back pressed against the cold exterior brick of a building.

"It wouldn't be the worst thing I've done," Shane says with a shrug and pulls back the knife, looking up at Phil before he drives it straight into his stomach.

Phil cries out in pain, and Shane steps back, pulling the knife out and letting Phil fall to the ground.

"It's more painful and takes longer when you go for the stomach," Shane says, "you should've thought twice before you messed with me Lester."

Phil watches as he walks away, before he curls up in a ball, his hands plastered to his stomach. He lies there for who knows how long, in agonising pain. He remembers seeing a trail of crimson on the concrete, mixing with a puddle of water.

He remembers closing his eyes.

He remembers thinking of Dan.

He remembers hearing Dan's voice.

He remembers feeling a warm hand on his face, and a tear falling onto his cheek from above him.

Then all he can remember after that is the darkness engulfing him at last.

******************

an// CLIFFHANGER MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I feel evil lol. I hope you liked the chapter! What will happen next though???

180 votes and 150 comments for a new chapter!!

If I don't update before new year (I probably won't, sorry) then HAPPY NEW YEAR AND SEE YOU IN 2016!!! Thanks so so so much for all the support on this book! You guys are seriously amazing! I never dreamt of getting this many reads! So thanks
you!! ^_^

SIDE NOTE: i was thinking of writing a teen fiction novel (not a phan one) if I did write one, would any of you guys read it?