Tessa's POV.

"Oh no you don't," he coolly remarks, "you tell me what you would want me to do first."

"I already did." I state, sipping on the bottle of wine.

"Chug some more wine, you only seem to tell me what you want when you've been drinking."

My thoughts are  slightly hazy, my head feels full and heavy, but in the best way. I'm grinning from ear to ear, intoxicated from the wine and Hardin's thick voice. I love this playful side of Hardin, and if he wants to play, I'll play.

"Fine, I want you to bend me over this bed here," I run my index finger along the cool wooden frame. "and take me the way you did on that desk." Instead of embarrassment,  I only feel the warm flush of heat trailing up my neck to my cheeks.

Hardin curses under his breath, I know that he didn't actually expect me to answer. "Then?" he asks quietly.

"Well.." I start, pausing to take another long swig of the white wine to gain confidence.   Hardin and I have never done this before, he has sent me a few racey text messages in the past,  but this.. this is different.

"Just say it, don't be shy now."

"You would hold me by the hips, the way you always do and I would cling to the bedsheets to keep myself stable, your fingers would dig into me, leaving marks in their wake.." I clench my thighs together when I hear his breathing hitch through the line.

"Touch yourself." He says and I quickly look around the room, momentarily forgetting that no one can hear our private conversation.

"What?  No." I harshly whisper, cupping the phone.

"Yes."

"I'm not doing that.. here. They will hear me." If I were talking to anyone other than Hardin  about this I would be completely horrified, wine or not.

"No they won't. Do it. You want to, I can tell."

How can he? Do I want to?

"Just lay back on the bed, close your eyes, spread your legs, and I'll tell you what to do." He commands.

"But I.."

"Do it." The authority in his voice makes me squirm while my mind and my hormones battle it out. I can't deny that the idea of Hardin coaxing me through this over the phone, naming the dirty things he would do to me, raises the temperature of the room at least ten degrees.

"Okay, now that you've agreed, " he begins without me  speaking my consent, "tell me when you are only wearing your panties."

Oh my.

I quietly pad over to the door and turn the lock between my fingers. Kimberly and Christian's room, along with Smith's,  is on the upper level of the house, but as far as I know they could still be on the first floor with me. I listen closely for movement and I hear a door shut above me, that's a good sign.

I hurry and grab the wine bottle,  finishing it off. The heat inside of me has turned from a small flicker to a blazing inferno and I try not to overthink the fact that I'm stepping out of my pants and climbing onto the bed, wearing only a thin cotton shirt and panties.

"Still with me?" He asks, a smirk is sure to be on his face.

"Yes, I'm.. I'm preparing." I can't believe I'm really doing this.

"Stop overthinking it, you'll thank me after."

"Stop knowing everything that I'm thinking." I tease, hoping that he's right.

"You remember what I showed you right?" I nod, forgetting that he can't see me. "Press your fingers where you did last time,"

.

Hardin's POV.

I hear her gasp and I know she has followed my instructions. I can picture it perfectly, her lying on the bed, legs spread open. Holy fuck.

"Fuck, I wish I was there right now, to watch you." I groan, trying to ignore the blood flowing straight to my dick.

"You like that, don't you? To watch me?" She gasps through the line.

"Yeah, fuck yeah I do. You liked to be watched too, I could tell."

"I did, just like the way you like when I pull your hair." She states and my hand reflexively moves between my legs. Imagines of her writhing underneath my tongue, her fingers tugging my hair as she moans my name fill my mind and I press my palm against myself. Only Tessa can make me this hard within seconds.

Her moans are quiet, too quiet. She needs more encouragement.

"Faster Tess, move your fingers in a circle, faster, imagine if was me and my fingers circling you, making you feel so fucking good, making you come." I urge, making sure to keep my voice down in case my annoying house guest happens to be in the hall.

"Oh my," she pants and moans again.

"My tongue too, baby, swirling against your skin, my sinful lips pressed against you, sucking, biting, teasing," I slide my gym shorts down and begin to stroke myself gently. I close my eyes and focus on her soft pants, pleas, and moans.

"Do what I'm doing, touch yourself." She groans and I'm gifted with the image of her back arching off the mattress as she pleasures herself.

"Already am," I mutter and she whimpers. Fuck, I want to see her.

"Talk to me, again." Tessa begs. I fucking love the way her innocence disappears in these moments, she always loves to hear such filthy things.

"I want to fuck you, no- I want to lay you back on the bed, and make love to you, hard and fast, so much so that you're screaming my name as I thrust deeper and deeper,"

"I'm," she moans low in her throat.

"Come on baby, let go. I want to hear you,"  I stop my words when I hear her come,  soft whimpers and whines, as she bites into the pillow, or the mattress, I have no fucking clue but the image sends me over the edge and I fill my boxers with a strangled groan of her name.

Our matched breathing is the only sound on the line for seconds or minute, I can't keep track.

"That was..." She begins, panting and out of breath.

"Yeah," I open my eyes and rest my elbows on the desk in front of me. My chest moves up and down as I try to catch my own breath.

"I need a moment." She giggles. A slow smile tugs at the corners of my mouth. "And here I thought we had done close to everything," she adds.

"Oh, there are plenty of other things I want to do to you. However, we have to be in the same city to do them."

"Come here then." She quickly responds.

"You said you didn't want me there, we need space remember?"

"I know, we do need space.. this seems to be working for us. Don't you think?"

"No." I lie. I know she's right, I have been trying to be better for her and I'm afraid that if she is quick to forgive me again, I will slip and lose the motivation. If we.. when we find our way back to one another I want it to be different, for her. I want it to be permanent so I can show her the pattern, "endless cycle" as she calls it, will end.

"I do miss you, so much." She says. I know she loves me but each time I'm given a sliver of reassurance, a weight if lifted from my chest.

"I miss you too." More than anything.

"Don't say too, it sounds like you're just agreeing with me." She says and my small smile grows, overtaking my entire being.

"You can't use my ideas, way to be original." I playfully scold her and she laughs.

"Can to." She childishly fires back. If she were here, her tongue would be sticking out of her mouth.

"God, you're feisty tonight." I stand from the chair, I need a shower.

"That I am."

"And incredibly daring, who knew I could get you to get yourself off over the phone." I chuckle as I walk into the hallway.

"Hardin!" She squeals in horror. I knew she would. "And by the way, you should know by  now you can get me to do just about anything."

"If only that were true." I murmur.If it was, she would be here now.

The concrete is cold on my bare feet, does Richard not know how to turn the damn heat up?

"Sorry man, it was getting a little warm in here earlier." Richard says and I hurry to cover the speaker on my phone.

It's too late, "Who was that?" Tessa asks, the running water I heard in the background only moments ago halts and she repeats herself, "Hardin, who was that?"

Fuck.

I mouth a quick "way to fucking go," to her father and hurry to the bathroom.

"It's.." I begin.

"Was that my father?"

I want to lie to her but that would be fucking stupid and I'm trying not to be so damn stupid anymore.

"Yeah, it was." I wait for her to scream into the receiver.

"Why is he there?" She questions.

"I.. well.."

"Are you letting him stay with you?" She releases me from the panic of finding the right words to say to explain this fucked up situation.

"Something like that."

"I'm confused."

"So am I." I admit.

"For how long? And why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm sorry, it's only been two days."

"Why did he come there in the first place?" She questions and the sound of running water returns.

I can't bring myself to tell her the whole truth, not right now. "He doesn't have anywhere else to go, I guess." I start the shower and she sighs.

"Okay.."

"Are you pissed?" I ask her.

"No, I'm not mad. I'm confused.. I can't believe you're actually allowing him to stay there." Her voice is full of wonder.

"Neither can I." The small bathroom fills with a thick cloud of steam and I wipe the mirror with my palm. I look like a fucking ghost, a shell really. Under my eyes, dark rings have already appeared from my lack of sleep. The only thing that gives me life is her voice coming through the line.

"It means a lot to me, Hardin." She finally says.

"It does?" This is going much, much better than I expected it to.

"Yes, of course it does."

I feel giddy all of the sudden, like a puppy that's been rewarded with a treat from it's owner and surprisingly, I'm perfectly fucking okay with that.

"Good." I don't know what else to say to her, I feel slightly guilty for not telling her about her father's...habits, but this isn't the time and over the phone isn't the way to tell her something like that.

"Wait.. so my father was there when you were... you know?" She whispers and a small roar sounds on the other line. She must have turned on the fan in the bathroom to drown out her voice.

"He wasn't in the room, I'm not into that type of thing," I tease to lighten the mood and she responds with a giggle.

"You probably are," she teases.

"Nope, that's one of the very few things I'm not into actually." I tell her with a smile, "I will never share you, not even with your father." I can't help but laugh as she makes a disgusted sound.

"You're sick."

"Sure am." I fire back and she giggles. The wine has made her adventurous and heightened her sense of humor, me.. well I have no damn excuse for this ridiculous grin on my face.

"I need to take a shower, I'm standing here with come all over me." I tell her and step put of my boxers.

"Me too." She says, "not the part about being covered, but I need a shower too."

"Okay.. so I guess we should get off.."

"We did already," she laughs, proud of her terrible attempt at a joke.

"Ha-ha." I tease her, "have a good night Tessa." I rush the words.

"You too," she lingers on the line and I end the call before she can.

The hot water cascades down my body, I still haven't fully recovered from her touching herself while I was on the phone, it's not only a huge fucking turn on, it's more than that. It shows that she still trusts me, she still trusts me enough to expose herself in that way for me. Lost in my thoughts, I push the hard bar of soap across my tattooed skin. It's hard to imagine only two weeks ago, we stood in this shower together..

"I think this one is my favorite," she peered up at me through wet lashes.

"Why is that? I hate that one." I glanced down at her small fingers trailing over the large rose tattoo etched near my elbow.

"I don't know, it's sort of beautiful the way you have a flower surrounded by all of this darkness," her finger moved over the haunting design of a withered skull just below.

"I never thought of it that way." I pressed my thumb under her chin to bring her eyes to mine. "You always see the light in me, how is that possible when there isn't any?"

"There is plenty, you'll see it too., someday." she smiled and stood on her toes to press her lips against the corner of my mouth. Water rushed between our lips and she smiled again before pulling away.

"I hope you're right." I whispered into the stream of water, so quietly that she didn't hear me.

The memory haunts me, replaying as I try to wash it away. It's not that I don't want to remember her, because I do. Tessa is my every thought, she always is.  It's only the memories and times when she gave me too much praise, when she tried to convince me that I'm better than I really am, that drive me mad.

I wish I could see myself the way that she see's me, I wish I could believe her that I'm good for her, but how can that be true when I'm so fucked up?

"It means a lot to me, Hardin." She said only minutes ago. Maybe if I keep doing what I'm doing now and stay away from shit that could get me in trouble, I can continue to do things that mean a lot to her. I can make her happy instead of miserable, and maybe, just maybe, I could see some of the light in myself that she claims to see.

Maybe there is hope for us after all.

(Don't' forget to comment and vote, please:) Ily all! It's already Thursday, how did that happen? I hope you all had an amazing weekend! xo)