The rest of the night was silent. Completely silent. After you had left the table, you found yourself in the bathroom of the restaurant, tears threatening to pour from your eyes. You tried your hardest to blink them away, not wanting to ruin your makeup. And when you came back, the food you and Suna had ordered sat on the table.

He didn't want to touch his food until you had gotten back from the bathroom. And when you did sit down, neither of you said a word to each other. You didn't want to, afraid that what was on your mind would cause an unnecessary argument in public and you didn't want that. You didn't want to fuck up the date more than it already was.

Now, here you were walking back into the house. Suna kindly opened the door for you, allowing you in first before he followed in after you, closing and locking the door behind him. You stripped yourself of your heels, leaving them at the front door before making way to the bedroom to get rid of the annoying dress you had on.

Suna watched as you walked away, not hesitating to leave him standing in the entryway. He knows he fucked up tonight. He let out a sigh, his shoes hitting heavy across the wooden floors as he walked into the bedroom where he saw you digging through your bag for some comfortable clothes to put on. As he stood in the doorway, he fiddled with his keys, eyes following your every moment like a hawk.

"I'm sorry." He spoke, leaning in the doorway. He wasn't expecting you to say anything and that way okay. He just wanted to apologize to you. He would apologize to you endlessly if need be.

"It's whatever, Suna." You practically mumbled as you zipped your bag back up, satisfied with the baggy shirt and sweats you had picked to wear. Deep down, it wasn't whatever, but for the sake of your relationship with Suna, you wanted to keep your mouth shut. You didn't want to get into another pointless argument with him, not when you're already hurting deep down inside.

"Y/n, it's not just whatever. I want us to talk about this-work it out." Suna stood up straight, slowly walking into the room as you changed out of your dress and into your other clothes. With the shake of your head, you rolled your eyes, slipping your shirt over your torso.

"It'll just end in an argument." You simply responded, snatching your sweats off of the bed and putting your foot through the pant leg. Suna sat on the edge of the bed, tossing his keys onto the nightstand. He let you finished getting dressed before saying anything else.

"Don't have that type of mentality. We're supposed to work on this, remember? Be mature about things? Trust each other?" Suna questioned. He reached his hand out to you slowly, grabbing onto yours before gently pulling you closer to him that way you were standing in between his legs. He just wanted to make you comfortable again.

"What more do you want to talk about? You fucked Faye out of spite, but you still love me, but you also might have got her pregnant, and let's not forget you're a total dumbass." You said in annoyed tone, listing things out one by one as you counted them on your fingers.

"Y/n." Suna tugged at your hand. He was looking at you but you didn't dare to look at him. You always did that when you were mad at him and he hated it. He just wanted to see you fully.

"I said what I said back at the restaurant. If that baby is yours, I'm leaving and we're done. I'm struggling to forgive you, Suna, I really am. Every time I look at you all I see is you and her. I never see us. All I think about is how you went out and fucked her. You really went out and just fucked someone else because you were mad at me." Your face scrunched up in disgust as your thoughts formed into words. You pulled away from him.

"I know I did. I know what I did was wrong. You don't understand how sorry I am, y/n. You don't understand how much I really want this to work between us. And I will never get with Faye, even if it was for the baby. I'd never do that you. Not again. You can call me as many names as you'd like, scream at me, hit me, do anything to me and I'd still love you." His eyes filled with sorrow as they glimmered under the bedroom light.

"In that moment," you turned to finally look him in the eye, "you didn't love me. You were just looking for a girl to get your dick wet. Because that's how it always starts out with you. It's how you met every girl you know, Suna. Including me. You'll never change." The frustration that you were holding in was starting to seethe from your words and expressions.

"And what about you, y/n? Will you ever change?" Suna was stood up now. "You're not as perfect as you think. You've done some shitty things too!"

Your eyes widened in anger, "I know I have! I've owned up to mistakes. I apologized when I kissed Haru, and I felt so fucking shitty for sleeping with Hiro! I felt horrible, Suna because I stopped down to your goddamn level!" You quickly defended yourself, stepping back from him.

"Did you feel bad because of me or because you had to leave him that night?" Suna asked honestly. There was always this thought in the back of his head, this one lingering thought that always bothered Suna, and it was whether or not you might actually like Hiro. Ever since that day on stage when Hiro called you up on stage, Suna couldn't really make sense of why you went up there. He hated seeing you and Hiro together, especially with Hiro so close to you like that. And now, one of his worse nightmares became true. Hiro actually got to you. He was able to touch you, feel you, hold you.

But Suna knows that's his karma for the way he's treated you-how shitty he's been towards you. He deserved every bit of it, but oh how much he hates it. He could feel the burning in his chest just recalling the moment he walked into Hiro's bedroom to see you sleeping in his bed.

"Excuse me?" You looked at man in front of you like he was stupid, brows furrowed. Suna clenched his jaw, hesitating to repeat the question again even though you probably heard him the first time.

"You heard what I said." Suna's eyes were low and heavy, staring back at you.

Your mouth was slightly agape as you stared back at him. You really couldn't believe he was asking you that question. For some reason, it was hard for you to understand why he would say something like to you. "Fuck you, okay?" You scoffed, turning to walk away before the argument got out of hand.

"You're walking away because you don't want to tell me the truth, right?" Suna followed after you. There was that familiar burning in his chest that made his skin heat up. "Answer me, y/n. Did you feel bad because of me or because you had to leave Hiro? You're gonna let that asshole get to you that quick, huh? You're really gonna feel bad for him after all the shit he's did and what he's said about you?!" Suna was starting to become enraged as you continued to walk away from him.

"Leave me alone!" You screamed, not daring to turn around. Your brain was screaming at you to fight back and say something to him, but you didn't want to escalate the situation. This wasn't how your time together was supposed to go.

"I knew you've always fucking liked him! Just tell me!" Suna raised his voice back at you.

Quickly turning on the heels of your feet you stared at Suna, "he treated me better in that one night that you ever have!" The words just slipped out. You spoke without thinking. Suna's expression dropped as he stared back at you. You didn't know what it was, but it was like you could see his heart crack right then and there. His eyes changed in a way you couldn't explain. They looked heavy with tears as seconds passed.

You quickly shut your mouth, eyes slightly widening at your own words. Did you mean it? Were you just saying that? You blinked, looking away from the broken man in front of you feeling extremely guilty for what you had just said. Suna stood there in silence, processing what you said to him. There was zero hesitation. The way you just said it, it must have some truth to it. But Suna couldn't help but feel every emotion fighting in his head.

He knows he was never the best boyfriend. Suna wasn't perfect from the start. He was an asshole who had put up walls to block out everyone. But you, you somehow made it over those walls and loved him, treated him right. And Suna tried to his best to do the same for you, but he wanted you to be in love with him just as much as he is in love with you. All those nights you spent together, all the fighting, all the tears, all the laughs and smiles, and the one moment that he held dear to his heart-the day he gave you the promise ring.

But, those words just broke him in every way possible. They defeated him and every effort it took to get you to love him like he loved you. He knew every little detail about you, what made you laugh, what made you cry. But Nothing worked. It didn't work. Suna slowly felt those walls being built back up as his mind began fighting his heart. He didn't want to let you go, but those words lingered in his head.

Do you not remember the good times you had together? The special moments? The sweet touches and soft kisses? How did Hiro do it? How did he get to you so fast? Just one night and you've already started to question everything? There was so many questions Suna wanted the answers to, but he knew he wouldn't get them without screams being heard.

"Rin...I'm so sorry I didn't mean that..." You spoke quietly, eyes softening. You couldn't even finish your own sentence. A war raged inside of Suna.

"Sleep in the guest room tonight, please." Suna clenched his jaw before turning away from you, walking back into the room.

"Rin, I didn't mean that." You followed after him, grabbing onto his hand, holding it gently in yours as you gently caressed his knuckles with your thumb. He quickly snatched his hand from you. Little did you know, those walls have been built back up.

"Please," Suna sighed, "stop calling me that and just leave me alone for the rest of the night." Suna shut his eyes, running his hands down his face.

Your eyes filled with tears. The guilt that weighed heavy on your shoulders was there to torture you now. "Listen to me, I was angry, I didn't mean it. I'm sorry. Listen to me." You pleaded, hands cupping his face so he could look at you. But Suna shook his head, hands grabbing onto your wrists before removing them from his face.

"Y/n, just please go in the guest room." Suna was starting to get annoyed.

"No." You simply responded, standing your ground.

"Please, go! I know how you truly feel and that's all I needed to hear! I don't even know why we wasted our time when we both know what you want. I'm sorry." Suna apologized, not for arguing, but for not being good enough for you, not doing enough for you. He sat down on the edge of his bed, eyes staring at the floor. Maybe you're right, maybe he'll never change. Maybe he was always meant to stay the same.

Suna suddenly didn't care anymore. He suddenly felt an empty void instead a mix of emotions. And maybe it was a reflex of his-voiding out his emotions when he gets hurt. It would be no surprise. It's better to feel nothing than feel hurt.

"I love you." You broke the silence, staring at Suna. He just sat there. As much as Suna wanted to respond to tell you he loves you too, he couldn't. He'd just open his heart up again. So he didn't. He didn't respond. "I said I love you, Rin."

You've never seen this side of him before. It was like he flipped a switch inside of himself the moment those words left your mouth. You and Suna had bad moments, of course. But, there was also times he treated you like the most precious thing on Earth. Though, did you really mean to say that to him? Was it the truth? That was the reoccurring question in your head.

"Leave." Suna's voice was low and demanding. You huffed, biting on your bottom lip as you left the bedroom to head to the guest room at the end of the hall. Suna quickly shut his door after you left, locking it too.

He knows this is his karma. He gets it now. And he gets that maybe you've always been right-it's time to go your separate ways. It's been bound to happen eventually no matter how times he's tried to change it. He has to let you go.

Suna has to let you go.

𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄:
Hey strangers. I haven't updated in like two, three weeks? I really can't remember lmao. But um, a little twist to the story...I guess. Or maybe it's just more angst and I'm reading too much into my own damn story. Anyway, this story is coming to an end soon, I'll try to make the chapters last as long as I can. Hope you enjoyed!