if screaming was a feeling, it would be this.

the gut wrenching sensation when no one believes you,

the rush of shame that hits you when you realize it was all your fault,

the forced vomit that bubbles out of your throat and into the toilet after a heavy meal,

the sharp sting of the scars on your arms or legs when they brush against cloth,

the realization that you will never be enough for them—

and all the moments you couldn't scream.