but you don't understand the shame that swallows me whole when i look in a mirror
and i remember all my sins,

you don't understand how it feels to want to be better so horribly but not enough to work for it,

you don't understand how my heart beats for my faith yet i still have the audacity to disregard it,

you don't understand what it's like to have nothing to live for other than god and still turn up a disappointment—

you don't understand how much i despise me.

...

god favours the strong over the weak.