Sitting on the bed next to her he held her hand, "Stevie...stevie he died..."

She was quiet for a moment, "Is it bad that I'm relieved...."

"No of course not, he was a monster to you"

"Can you go out Jack down?" Stevie looked like she was struggling. "Of course, sorry" Lindsey finally pried Jack away, put him back in his crib. "Lindsey...I don't know what to do...I don't know how to feel better."

"Why honey?" He didn't dare touch her yet. "I've never been loved or comforted or anything! I was raised in foster care and then Rick helped me run away! I've never been good with this stuff!" She cried.

"Let me...I'll do it all if you let me..."

"I will let you! I'm so tired of thinking! I just want to do something and not be scared!"

"Stevie..." he waited till she looked at him, then placed his lips gently onto hers for a second. "Kiss me again," she breathed softly against his lips. Holding her face he kissed her again, more firmly this time.

"I'm scared..."

"Of what?"

"Pain..."

"I'm not going to hurt you..."

"I trust you..."

"We don't have to do anything fully"

Stevie nodded and laid back on the bed, "Please be careful."

"You want to do it now...?"

"I just want to forget everything for a little while...I've never been loved like this before." Lindsey kissed her again, laying on top of her extra gently.

Stevie opened herself to him, "I'm far from perfect..."

"You're beautiful...I saw you earlier" Stevie grinned up at him, pulling him closer to her after she slid off her robe. Lindsey looked down at her body, noticing bruises everywhere. "Please ignore them..."

Scooting down her body he didn't miss a single one with his kiss. "I've never felt like this before," she gasped. "You're about to feel a whole lot better hopefully..."

Stevie nodded, clutching the sheets in her hands nervously. Lindsey went lower, eventually placing his mouth onto her. Stevie sat up on her elbows to watch what he was doing, "That feels good..."

Holding her hips he massaged them as he slowly worked on her. "A little more..."

He moved onto her clit, slowly but firmly taking it into his mouth. "Please don't bite me!" She begged quickly, jerking her hips. He didn't do anything of the sort, just running his tongue across it. "Lindsey," she thrashed her head bald and forth. "What's wrong?" He asked worried he'd hurt her. "Is supposed to feel like this?" Stevie gasped, writhing her bottom half. Lindsey smiled and carrying on, trying to push her over.

He felt her whole body tense as her legs seized, "Shit!" She arched her back. Stevie didn't know what was happening to her, so she begun to cry, in between shaking. Reaching for Lindsey she repeatedly jerked against him, "What the hell was that?" She panted.

"That, was an orgasm and a half!"

"Does sex feel better than that?"

"A lot better..."

"Really?" Her eyes lit up. "Mhmm...trust me..." he wiped his chin

"Well that was amazing," she smiled softly."You wanna...?" He asked travelling up her body. "I don't think I could..."

"Why not? What's wrong?"

"Ricky ruined me...down there...." Stevie turned her head away from him. "It looked pretty alright from where I was" he gave her a kiss. "...but inside...." she sighed

"Why would he? Did...did he always just use himself...?"

"Whatever he felt like..."

"What was the worst...?" He needed to know if it was safe to make love to her. Stevie's face contorted, "I don't want to tell you!" She cried

"Baby...I need to know whether you're safe" he held her. "Lindsey..." she whimpered, turning on her side. "Alright..." he moved away, not touching her whilst she cried. "He would use whatever he could get his hands on..."

"It's fine, Stevie I shouldn't of pushed you, I'm sorry"

"You can try..."

"Are you on the pill?" He asked touching her arm

"I'm not on anything..."

"Then I'm not trying"

"I'm already pregnant..."

Lindsey froze, then stood up and walked to the window, staring out. Stevie pulled on her robe, "I shouldn't have dropped that on you..."

"How far along?"

"I don't know..."

Lindsey punched the wall next to him, placing his head on the window. Stevie coward away from him, "I-I'll go." Stevie rushed downstairs and out the front door.

"Shit..." Lindsey ran as fast as he could, running down the drive, grabbing her and picking her up, carrying he back into the house. "No! Let me go!" Stevie cried

"Stevie stop...I'm not going to hurt you" She cried pitifully in his arms, laying limp against him. "I'm angry at him...never at you" he placed his forehead to hers and carried her back to his room. "Are you sure?"

"I promise you! None of this was your fault" lying her down her gently laid over her once more. "Lindsey, I don't want things to be awkward..."

"Why would they be?"

"Because of the baby..."

"Why? It isn't their fault is it"

"Will you please take me to the doctor soon?"

"Of course I will! I'll be whatever you need me to be"

"Just a friend...right now..."

"You want me to get off?" He asked

"No, I like being close to you."

"I...I wanted to make love to you..."

Stevie closed her eyes, "Okay..."

Lindsey stood up and removed his clothes, taking off Stevie's robe and laying back between her legs

"I want you to tell me as soon as anything hurts okay?!"

Stevie nodded, "Please be gentle."

Running his fingers slowly down between them he touched her, trying to create some lubrication

She bit her lip, arching her back slightly, "A little harder..."

Putting a little more pressure onto her, he changed the direction of his fingers

"Like that," she gasped

He kept going, moving his head down so he could place his mouth over one of her breasts, at the same time

Stevie raised her hips, "Yes!"

Lindsey removed his fingers, and coated his member in her, before sliding the smallest part of himself into her

He noticed that she wasn't very tight, it didn't seem to cause her much discomfort

He tried sliding more of himself into her, looking for any reaction from her

Stevie shook her head, "Stop!"

"Why...?" He stopped moving completely

"It hurts!" Stevie pushed on his chest

"Just wait..." he told her looking into her eyes and stroking her cheeks

Biting her lip, she nodded

"Keep your eyes on me, remember that it's me, Lindsey..." he sank into her further and gave a small thrust

Stevie yelped, "Okay..."

Lindsey kept it slow, continuing his movements until he was completely inside her

Stevie was still frozen underneath him, eyes shut tightly

"Enjoy the feeling...this isn't hate, it's love...I won't hurt you" he thrust again

"I'm not scared...I'm in pain," she cried

Lindsey sighed and pulled out, picking his boxers up and pulling them on

"I'm not ready...He raped me with-with-" she sobbed

"Stevie...what? Please tell me..." he pulled her up into his arms

"Please don't freak out!" Stevie cried, "...it was multiple things..."

"I'm not going to freak out...please"

"He-he started with a broom stick..."

Lindsey closed his eyes and held her tighter

"And then a bowling pin....th-then a baseball bat!" She sobbed

"Stevie..." Lindsey cried, bringing her even closer to himself

"I didn't want you to know!"

Lindsey just continued to cry, not know how someone could do something like that to someone they claimed to love

"This is why I didn't want to tell you..."

"How could he do that to someone so perfect..."

"I'm not perfect-not even close."

"Yes you are...you're perfect, your body is perfect, even covered in bruises"

Stevie kissed him softly, "I love you..."

"You...you do?"

"Yes-I know now that I love you...please don't breaks my heart."

"Oh god, I won't! I promise I won't!" He kissed her back

They were interrupted by Jack screeching, "I guess he's awake," Lindsey laughed

"I'll go!" She smiled tying her robe around herself and walking down the hall

Lindsey followed behind, "He's probably hungry."

"Why don't you go and make him a bottle?"

"Bring him downstairs and we can eat together," Lindsey suggested

"Alright I'll go and get him" she walked in and lifted him from his crib

"You're so beautiful with him..."

"I love children..." she smiled

"You'll be so good with your own," Lindsey grinned softly

"I'm not sure I'm having my own yet"

"And why is that?"

"Well look who their father was"

"He's gone now... we'll get you taken care of," Lindsey kissed her forehead

"I want it taken care of...if you get me"

"No... you don't want to do that..."

"I do...how am I supposed to look at them?"

"With love..."

"I don't think I can do that..."

"You are the most loving person I know!"

"Lindsey, please, this isn't your decision"

"I know it's not..."

"I can't do it..." she sobbed

Lindsey took her into his arms, "Shhh..."

"After everything he did to me I couldn't look at them as a mother should"

"I understand."

"What would you do...?"

"I'm not sure...I've never been in your shoes."

Stevie held up Jack and cuddled him

"Sweet boy!"

Lindsey silently kissed her forehead, "It'll all be okay."

"You have a lot of faith in me..."

"You haven't given me any reason not to..."

"When Jacks been fed I...I want to make you...feel good..." she said nervously not sure he'd want her now. "We can do that," he nodded, kissing her once more. "Good!" She smiled and sat down at the table, moving Jack around so his back was against her front.

"Hey bud!" Lindsey smiled, "Hungry?" He gurgled and kicked his legs meaning yes he was hungry and he wanted his bottle.

"Give me a minute," Lindsey chuckled, heating a bottle. "What are these? Are these your feet?" She said distracting him, holding his feet then lightly tickling them. Jack howled happily as she tickled him, "You like Stevie?!" Lindsey laughed causing Jack to giggle again and snuggle back into Stevie's front, giving his father the answer.

"Here's breakfast!" Lindsey held it up to Jack lips, the baby being old enough to hold it on his own. Sitting down at the table he drank his coffee

"How are you?" Stevie asked rubbing Jacks legs. "Me or the baby?" Lindsey chuckled. "You, silly," Stevie smiled

"I'm good...I'm just worried about the whole Ricky situation..."

"Why, you think I'm going to get in trouble?" She said holding Jack a little tighter. "No! I just meant funeral arrangements..."

"I don't care...Lindsey...I killed my husband..." she suddenly thought about it, having not before so much.

"You protected yourself..."

"You do know even that would get me a manslaughter charge..."

"We will call his parents, you'll play the grieving wife and say you can't deal with it."

"Are you joking? His parents hate me!"

"Stevie this is going to look bad."

"Do you not think I don't know that?!" She yelled, making Jack jump. "Calm down...."Lindsey kneeled in front of her. "I can't! If I need to tell them what he did to me, that's going to give me perfect motive!"

"Look, you and I can go and give them evidence that he abused you. They can't prove that you did it. If they get suspicious tell them that I was self defense."

"Lindsey...they will want to look...down there, that's going to be so humiliating..." she cried, Jack tipping his head backwards to see what was going on.

"But is necessary, honey. I will be with you every step of the way!"

"I could barely let me boyfr...my friend look at it, I'm not going to let a stranger..."

"A medical professional that can vouch that he raped you several times!"

"Please, just leave me alone!" She got up, thrusting Jack back to Lindsey and walking from the kitchen. "Come on, bud. You've finished your breakfast now let's get you back to your mother," taking Jack upstairs.

Stevie was standing in the window, leaning her hair against it, running her finger in a pattern against the glass. Lindsey stopped and stared for a second, "Stevie, I'm sorry but I don't know how to help you if you won't let me."

"I'm going to tell them that it was me..."

"All you have to do is say it was in self defense, I don't get why that's so hard for you to understand!"

"Because he ended up dying Lindsey! What don't you understand hmm? He didn't just get a broken bone and walk away! He fucking died!"

"I know that! All you have to fucking do is show them your body! They'll believe you!"

"Do you not get how utterly ashamed I am?" She sobbed.

"Why are you ashamed of killing someone that repeatedly raped you?!"

"I'm ashamed of my body Lindsey! I'm ashamed that I let this happen! I have nothing in this world and it's all my fault"

"You didn't know that Ricky was a psycho!"

"Everyone told me to get away, but I thought I could change him"

"...but he changed you..."

"Yes! He he did change me! He changed me into this, which is why you and I are not going places..."

"We just met officially...."

"Well that's as far as it goes..."

"What are you saying?"

"How are you supposed to be happy with someone like me, really?"

"Why wouldn't I be happy?"

"How are you supposed to be happy with no physical contact? How could you ever love someone like that?"

"Stevie...you doubt yourself too much."

"Because no body has ever made me feel different...is Jack going now?" She said noticing that he'd got a coat on. "Yeah...glad to know I'm just like everyone else," Lindsey grabbed Jack's bag. "Lindsey...please...." she ran after him

"I'm trying to help you here!"

"I know..." she tried to take his hand but he didn't want to right now. "I'm taking Jack home," Lindsey said, walking away. "Can I come?"

"No...."

"Why?" She asked

"I said no!"

"Okay...sorry, I'm sorry..." she backed herself away into the corner of the room out of habit. "I'm sorry too, but I need to be alone."

"I understand..." Lindsey walked out the door without another word, Stevie watching him drive off, as she sat in the window waiting for him to return

Much sooner than she expected Lindsey pulled into the drive way, Stevie was still sitting by the door waiting for him to enter.

"I'm sorry..." Lindsey sighed

"Why are you sorry...?"

"For yelling."

"It's okay...I deserved it"

"No you didn't, not at all."

"I did...I'm sorry...so sorry..." Stevie began to cry. Lindsey kneeled beside her, "You are perfect! You are fine!"

"You think I'm perfect?"

"In every way...."

"Lindsey, kiss me...please..." Leaning in slowly, he cupped her face and kissed her tenderly, "I'm going for a swim, make yourself at home."

"Thanks" she smiled, Lindsey walking to the bedroom to get his swimming trunks

Lindsey stripped down and grabbed a towel, pulling on his bottoms. "Stevie you can join me if you want," he said as he walked down the stair case. "I've got nothing to wear, I can't swim naked" she laughed. "I will if you will," He shrugged

"Alright then, you're on..." she said raising her eyebrow, Lindsey stripped off his bottom and gestured for her to do the same. Stevie nervously took off her robe and did the same, before quickly jumping into the pool. Lindsey dove in after her, "And where are you off to so quickly?"

"I don't want to frighten you off with how I look in daylight" she laughed nervously. "You could never frighten me," shaking his head, a slight smile on his face. "You say that now"

"Stevie....I really, really love you...truly."