6-27-16
Oh god just take me home
where suicide is seen
and pain is inevitable.

Oh god just take me home
Where walls are dirty,
Where people lie, cheat, and steal,
Where subfloors and broken glass are my wake up call,
Where the mirrors just feel my pain-
They don't talk back or cut like a knife.

Please please please get me the fuck out I'm begging you. I don't belong here. Take it back to the days I'd wake up and drink a Monster, kiss you in churches and have window talks. I miss my walls, i miss the smoke. This damn box isn't doing enough. TAKE ME HOME OH PLEASE GET ME AWAY FROM HERE FUCK MY MOM FUCK HER FAKE ASS LIFE FUCK OUR FINANCIAL STATE I NEED DILLON I NEED DESTANY I NEED TO GET OUT I NEED TO PHYSICALLY GET AWAY. I SWEAR TO GOD IF I WAS BACK HOME AT THE TRAILER I'D LOVE IT LIKE I NEVER HAVE BEFORE THAT'S ALL I WANT RIGHT NOW. I. DONT. BELONG. HERE. GET ME OUT PLEASE I CAN'T LIVE HERE.

I hate this house, i hate these walls.
I was born to die,
When will the devil call?
I hate her voice, i watch the floor
Used to bleed,
You know i want more
I hate her lies, i hate her life
Feeling safe here
Would never be right.

I bleed onto these pages, my words come straight from my veins. And I shoot up this art and the high is what i love.

People are watching me as I walk down the aisles of the grocery store, they're all unfamiliar. They look at me and see anger and disconnection and anxiety. There's a reason I look so pale. They see a face of teenage rebellion, scars they could never see. Stop staring, I'm nothing to look at. God, I almost smirk knowing I'll fuck shit up here.

I've tried to talk to these walls the only way I know how, I've rapped for them, gave them a run down but I ain't talking to nobody, I'm just giving these thoughts a voice and letting them hang in the air and it's so empty and I've come to realize I don't love nice things, I don't love pretty and glamorous things. I love the broken, the fucked up.

The streets are still alive.
Rap's not dead.
Punk's not dead.

Waiting for hours for you.
Waiting for hours on anxiety.
Driving around,
Getting cigarettes and going roofing with you.
- (m.m)

Raaaaaant