Reid

New York, United States

I saw her for the first time a week ago.

The wind was brutal that day, and her hair kept blowing across her face. I only caught a glance before someone bumped into my shoulder and nearly knocked me down. I only caught sight of her retreating back disappearing into the subway station. She was pretty—that's all I remembered thinking.

And now today, by chance, I saw her again.

I'd been sitting for ten minutes before she came and took a seat across from me. I couldn't believe it. The chances of seeing the same person in New York City twice in the same week are less than none.

Initially, I looked over just to see who was there, and it was her, already staring at me. It wasn't my fault I was having a bad hair day, but maybe it was worse than I had thought. But then I remembered I had my hood on, so that couldn't be it. There was no way I could just stare back, so I tried to give her a smile. I had never been good at smiling, but I attempted one anyway. One side of my mouth turned up . . . I think.

I don't think it worked.

When she looked away, I knew it was a lost cause, because at first glance, there were some immediate differences between us. Bluetooth earbuds were in her ears and she glanced at her phone often, whereas I didn't even own a phone. From the bulkiness of her bag, I could tell there were schoolbooks hidden inside. I was a dropout.

I could count on one hand how many people knew I existed, and it was fewer than four, one of them being a best friend who was barely ever around. And another who was like a half brother, but I rarely saw him either.

The train came to a stop.

I glanced over to see her leave. As the doors shut, I had already accepted that I would never see her again, but something happened that I wasn't anticipating. I expected her to keep walking, never to think of me again—after all, I was just a stranger on a train.

Instead, the girl stopped on the platform and turned back to look at me. It was the most unexpected thing, and in my nervousness, I gave her one last feeble attempt of a smile, so she knew I saw her. The train lurched forward, and I lost sight of her as the tunnel swallowed me.

The lights flickered, and with a glance to her empty seat, I saw a hat lying there. Had it been there before? Was it hers? I couldn't remember if she was wearing one when she sat down.

I made a split-second decision. Besides, I had nothing else to do. Hell, I was riding the train because I had nothing else to do. It was either ride the subway more or roam the streets—decisions, decisions.

The hat now gave me a reason to say something to her. It gave me a reason to see her again and, in that moment, I knew I wanted to see the stranger from the train. Even if just to learn her name.

I grabbed the hat, closed my eyes, and when I opened them, I was standing on the subway platform the train had just departed from. People stood around, waiting for the next train to arrive. Of course, no one noticed me appear. They never did unless they happened not to be looking at their phones or staring at the empty space I suddenly came to inhabit. I pulled the strap of my bag over my head and across my chest, then started for the exit. My eyes scanned the crowd frantically as I moved, then I caught sight of the girl at the top of the escalator.

I started after her, but with too many people in front of me, I had to wait my turn to go up the escalator. She got up to the street before I did, and then I had to fight through a group of school kids before I caught sight of her turning the corner. I quickened my pace to catch up.

She took a left and started down a more residential street with trees lining the sidewalks. It was a nice neighborhood. Not expensive or fancy, but somewhere in between. I was about to call out to her when she turned up a set of steps and disappeared inside.

I stopped, hat still in hand. It would be really weird now if I knocked on the door. Hey, I'm that stranger from the subway and I happen to know where you live now. Yeah, not creepy at all.

I tucked the hat inside my bag, thinking maybe I'd come back later. Maybe leave it on her doorstep with a letter.

No, that would be even weirder.

So, without anything else to do, I drifted.

#

A little before five-thirty, I came back to the front of her house and leaned against one of the old oaks across the street. It was dusk, but the house was still relatively dark inside. There were lights on in the living room, but the top half was still dim and shadowy. I didn't know what I was doing there, and I didn't have any reasons other than the hat in my bag.

A small car turned onto the street and parallel parked almost effortlessly in front of the house. A middle-aged man climbed out. He had to be her father. His hair was just as dark as hers, not yet showing signs of gray, but he wore glasses. He never gave me a glance as he walked inside.

I knew I should have just left. I couldn't stand outside her house forever and hope to "run into" her again. I glanced at her house one last time and saw a face peering out of the top window.

It was her, and she was looking right at me.

It was only for a moment, and then something distracted her attention behind her, and that's when I made my break. I was gone before my heart took another beat and my stomach flipped. I never had to think about drifting anymore. It came without effort, as easily as breathing. I was gone long before she even turned around again, leaving but a slight breeze as any proof that I had ever been there.

The park was deathly quiet when I appeared, and the old bench was cold as I sat down, placing my bag next to me on the seat. Minutes rolled on, and I tried to occupy my mind until I would be tired enough to go home and sleep.

An evident breeze warned me I wasn't alone, but I also didn't have to worry. Just as I said, I could count on one hand how many people knew I existed, but there were only two who I still saw on occasion.

"You look sad sitting there like that. You know that, right?" Jake's Australian accent interrupted the silence, but I smiled anyway. He came around the front of the bench and shoved my bag aside to make room for himself. His hair was extremely messy, as usual, half of it pulled into a bun, and he wore a worn leather jacket. He smelled like expensive cigars.

"I haven't seen you since last month. Did you get lost in Japan?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Only for about a week."

I laughed because it was a joke. Drifters never got lost.

"Do you have a house there now?" I glanced at him sideways. "Maybe I should check it out."

"I just got one yesterday actually," he said, glancing at me, "but we both know you won't be stopping in."

"Sure, I will." My sarcasm was all too obvious, and I rolled my eyes.

Jake's smile disappeared. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm sitting, stupid. What does it look like?"

"Reid." Jake's voice was on that serious line that he rarely used, and I knew he was going somewhere I didn't want to. "I mean, what are you doing here? You can go anywhere in the world, and yet you choose to stay here. I don't see the point." He shook his head. "Sometimes I don't understand you."

I stared out at the water and knew I needed to change the subject.

"You coming this weekend?" I asked.

Jake shot me a glare but answered, "You shouldn't even go. You're getting yourself in deeper every time you do. It's not safe and you know it."

I waited, knowing the rest of his answer was coming.

He finally said, "Yeah, I'll be there, but just to see you get your ass kicked."

"You wish."

His smile disappeared again. "You know you have to stop soon, Reid. One of these times, I won't be there to bail you out. They'll find out about you soon enough."

He was in one of those moods and I hated it.

"Well, until then, it's the only thing I can do."

"No, it's the only thing you will do."

I stood up in a rush and turned to face him. "Because it's the only thing I know, Jake! I'm not like you. I don't steal things that aren't mine. You take advantage of too much."

"And you take advantage of nothing. We don't have this ability just to do nothing with it. I don't know about you, mate, but I want to actually live my life. You?" He gestured toward me. "You act like you don't even have one."

"I'm living, too, just in a different way. Why can't you just accept that I'm not the same as you?"

Jake stood and I hated having to look up at him. "Oh yeah? Where are you living these days? The last time I saw you, you weren't."

"I found a place."

"You found a place?" he mimicked. "Does it come with a loo?"

I glared at him as best I could. "I get by just fine. I don't need you to tell me what to do."

"Sometimes it seems I do." His eyes searched me, and I felt exposed.

I clenched my jaw and grabbed my bag, slinging it across my chest. "I'll see you around."

I was about to drift when he caught hold of my arm. "Reid, I've told you before, you're welcome to stay at my place. I mean it."

"Which one? I don't fancy Paris as much as you do."

He smiled crookedly. "You know I have one here, too, and I always will." He let go of my arm. "I'll see you this weekend. Try not to get lost until then."

Jake disappeared before I did, and by then I realized I didn't know where I was going. I didn't lie when I'd said I found a place, because I did. I just didn't want to go there yet.

So I just went wherever my mind took me.