I sat on the stool breaking my knuckles as a ball of tension ran around me like a ping-pong ball.

My legs bounced as my knees knocked together. I twisted my head in a circular fashion trying to get the stress out, but it was of no help.

I was inside the pit lane, a little further away from the garage and the crew. They had made up a small tent next to it to give me some space to think and clear my head. I sat there alone, trying to get my thoughts together, but things were going out of control. My head was spinning and the sweat beads ran down my spine.

I got up and walked around. I wanted all the thoughts to be outside the window and I wanted my head to be clean. I took deep breaths. The fact that this time I was all alone made me shrink further.

I had done everything I could to make sure that everyone I counted on was at the tracks. The tracks that Ashley had chosen was far off from the town and it was a three hour drive to the place. She was cunning in letting me know that place only at six in the evening.

I had sent a shout out to almost everyone I knew to come to the tracks and not to be late. I had stood at the entrance making sure that all of them had come and had taken their respective seats. I had travelled along with Dan and Calvin with Dad sitting in front as we drove to my final destination.

Lily, Nick and James had also made it just before I had to go and get ready for the race. I had specifically left of Monica and Mira out because I knew they couldn't handle it if they knew what I was about to deal with. Besides, I had decided that it was not my place to invite them.

I didn't want to take sides now that I knew certain guy's intentions.

I still had to do my hair and pull it into a bun, but I hesitated. The hair that fell on my face hid my true emotions if Dan or Calvin were to come here to cheer on me.

Except for my friends, who thought it was just the nerves because of the illegal race, none of them knew the actual weight I was carrying around. Suddenly, the whole race track felt small and I felt constricted and confined. I was not able to breathe as I leaned on the chair.

This was the time when Robert would come up with funny stuffs and flirts to get my head out of the frightening zone. But today he wasn't here and he had chosen his side very well from the beginning. I was only a pawn that was being played.

Yet, those damned feeling I had for him were still lingering there and it made me wonder if he felt the same way for me. My head had weaved fantasies around him, as he held me to his bosom, protecting me from this cruel world. But how could he feel anything when he was after my blood from the time we had met?

Will I be able to see him before I start racing? As a final wish? Maybe to say my final goodbyes to him?

No, it was bad enough already and I didn't want his face to come in the mix and spoil the already rotten mind of mine. I only had to breathe to get myself back to normal and I would be great.

"Hey." I heard a voice behind me. I slowly turned around to see the only guy that I was thinking about all this time. "You okay?"

Robert stood at the entrance, acting as if everything was going on fine. His face didn't have the effect I thought it would. His curly hair was matted to one side, his dark gaze lingering on me as if he was seeing me for the first time. His casual jeans and shirt matched to the outside illegal game, and I wondered if us ever affected him at all.

But then again, why would it?

I was wrong in calculating and wondering if I could have a chance to see him again, just once before the race began. But I was so wrong. His perfect attire with his perfect stupid smile was tearing me apart instead of holding me together.

Robert's question was enough to push me to the anger zones that I had safely pushed away. What was he even asking me? Was I okay? After everything that he had done to me, was I okay?

"I'm dandy." I said glaring at him. But he only broke into a small smile. "Why the fuck are you here in my pit? Get the hell out of here."

"Scarlet." He sighed, his smile forgotten. "I don't think we got a chance to clear things between us after... you know."

"I don't think I want to clear anything between us." I said. "To be frank, there was nothing between us. You were my coach and I was your student. That's all it was there."

To my own ears, those felt like white lies and even I couldn't believe that shit anymore. We had so much more between us and words couldn't compare to it. But that was all gone now. What was left was only the space that stood in between separating us.

Robert took a step closer to me and my body stiffened.

"I have told you earlier that I wanted some NOS for Maria." He started and I couldn't look away.

He had damaged my life and my soul, yet his face held me hostage. If I looked closely, his eyes didn't have the same color it once held around me. His stubble had grown a little longer than the normal length before he shaved again. For a second, I thought he would pull me into his arms and wake me up from this terrible nightmare.

"I was working with Ashley before." He said, his eyes never leaving me.

Those words were enough to get me out of my haze and face the reality that was laying right in front of my face. How dare he come back into my life and talk as if he hadn't done anything wrong? He didn't have the right.

"No! Fuck you!" I screamed. "I never said you could talk! Get out!"

"Baby, please listen to me." He begged, taking a step towards me. Instinctively, I took a step back. "Just give me five minutes. I just want you to know what went through. I'm not asking for your forgiveness. I know I fucked up, but please hear me out."

Monica's words rang in my head loud and clear. She had said the same thing to me and I wondered if they had talked this out together before talking it to me.

"Five minutes." I said a little harsher than I intended to. But Robert seemed to be satisfied with it. He nodded his head before he opened his mouth again.

"I asked her for an advance, but she said if I did some work for her, she would let me have what I wanted." He said.

Though I had told him that I didn't want to hear anything from him, I was slowly giving in. Perhaps, I thought it was better to know that he liked me in some twisted way before I was snatched away for good. It might probably rest my soul in peace.

"What work did you do for her before?" I asked, my voice as low as a whisper.

"Garage stuffs." He said, putting his head low. "Cleaning, washing. That kind. She told me that there was a girl who needed some training and I had to get her in my hands, romantically or by force."

I gulped down, my fears coming in.

"I had agreed, of course." He shrugged. "We are racers and we hardly decline anything that comes with girls." I stood numb from his words. "It was only training for me, but then I got closer to you. I got to know you and your family. And suddenly, it was not a project for me anymore."

I looked at him and the vulnerability in his face was not unseen.

"Ashley had asked me to get you involved with me romantically. But instead, I had involved with you romantically." He said. I shook my head sideways, making myself understand that it was all a big fat lie. "You know it is true." He said, taking another step towards me. He held my hand as I closed my eyes, giving in to his touch. "I thought it was okay because I had seen you fall for me too. I had achieved what Ashley wanted."

"I hate you!" I gritted my teeth together as tears blinded me. He knew I had fallen for him and yet he didn't tell me or her that the so called project was off-limits? He still took the money from her, while he fucking played with me. "I really hate you."

"Baby, I didn't know why she wanted that kind of a relationship for us." He pulled my chin up to meet his eyes. "But when I got to know about your Dad, I had placed one beside another and I had figured it all out."

"Yet, you fucking messed with me!" I screamed, pushing him away. A tear rolled down my cheeks and my head ached. "You didn't tell me. You kept things from me!"

"No, no." He came closer. "I had a plan. I wanted to know her intentions with you before I came clean."

I scoffed, wiping my tears of pity away. "You think that makes me believe you?"

"But, you heard me talking with Ashley and you got it all wrong." He said. "Trust me, what I'm telling you is all true."

An insane part of me told me to forget all the past and to make peace with him. Just to go and hug him before everything was turned into ashes, but the sane part held me back.

Even after being careful all this time, he had made his way to my heart, only to shatter it into pieces. I was defeated and tired of all that was happening. Somewhere deep down, I knew I was ready to face my fate. I was ready to let go and rest in peace where I had no more troubles.

Suddenly, death seemed like a welcomed guest.

I sunk on the stool, wanting to forgive him, but I couldn't find it in me to believe him. The frustration of it all, brought back tears to my eyes.

"Hey," Robert came near me and crouched on the ground as he faced me. "Please let me help you. I know Ashley better than anyone else here."

"So, that makes you what?" I asked, looking away.

"It's hurting to look at you this way, Scarlet." He brought his hands up and wiped my tears away. His touch alone sent tingles down my spine even when I was laying on my death bed.

How was it possible for anyone to have such an effect when they had inflicted so much of pain? We were not even close to lovers, yet I couldn't help but fall for him every time I let him in. I wanted to kick him in the shins while at he same time I wanted to push him against the wall and kiss him.

We were fucked up in our own way and I didn't know what was right from the wrong.

Sure, he had his own reasons to do what he did, but he had broken my heart in two and had went ahead to sell them off to the devil. Yet, here I was handing him those same broken pieces to him, letting him break into a million more.

Was I freaking insane for it? Was I damaged do repeat histories with him? Was I ready to trust him once more to let him play with my heart again?

No matter what I would say, the answer always circled around an easy yes. I would let him ruin me and shatter me into pieces. I would let him walk over me and smile every time he turned back to see how much of a damage he had left me in.

I had fallen, way too deep to get back on my own feet. The past two weeks I had hardly slept running things over my head where we were still together. I would push him down the stairs just to see him happily fall for me, over and over just like I would for him.

My heart was on sale and he had stolen it. It was gone and he was the sole owner of it all. The worst part was, I was happy that I couldn't do anything about it.

How sick was that?

"Trust me on this." Robert was saying as I had zoned out. He stood on his knees, cupping my face his both of his hands, looking at my eyes as if he were starting at my soul.

I was suddenly transported back in time when he used to hold me just before our lips met in a chaste kiss. Before I could change my mind, I was nodding my head to his words, clinging to it like my life depended on it.

For all I knew, he could still take it and throw it down the cliff. But at that moment, as we sat staring at each other, I wanted to trust him once more. Just one last time, in a hope that he might prove me wrong.

Robert nodded his head at me. "I still know her tricks. I can be your earpiece and together, we can fight her off."

His words were like a ray of hope in my darkened doom. They were giving me some assurance that no one here was able to give me. Calvin, Dan, Luke had said their sympathies, but Robert was the only one who said that he would fight along with me.

"Is that okay?" He asked, slowly as he held my hand in his, squeezing it in assurance.

In my half dazed and half defeated state, I nodded my head. "Okay."

"Ashley always aims for an inner apex, so make sure that you are at the outer one." He said, his voice clearly business like. "The catch fence is her favorite tool to double over the cars, so keep away. And the gears..."

"Well, well, well." Robert and I looked towards the entrance to see Ashley standing there alone with a pleased expression on her face. "Look what we have here."

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A/N: Ahhhh, I'm literally screaming! I can't wait for you guys to read the next chapter!