Arjun's POV

I was studying the blue prints of my new project in my study where I do most of my work when I am at home.
I am not getting my mind off Rahil's matter also I am worried about lily' s safety. Am I doing right with her?! She said yes to me but I know it from within that she is just a pawn in my game. Fuck! That sounds so disgusting!

One thing Mark always told me is that a king can have no friends and now I am starting to fully believe that. It's not just about Rahil but it's about Radhika too. My baby's heart will wither away if she gets to know what I am going to do to her brother once I lay my hands on him. Lily is going to solve a big issue for me and I have promised myself that I will marry her off once she is back. Will she agree?!

She must either by will or by force!
I have taken in account her best interest right?! If She gets married then she will have a family that she lost at a very tender age. She will be happy like I am happy with Radhika.

No matter what I do, my baby never leaves my thoughts, she is always on my mind and whatever I am doing it's for her happiness.

You tell that to others, Arjun. You know very well how hurt Radhika will be once she knows what you are up to!

My alter ego rebuked me but I silenced it any which ways. Well I am alone so I can admit it that I am doing this for myself as well as Radhika but it's more for Radhika than me. I am coldhearted but my Radhika won't be able to take it if she gets to know how her brother is plotting revenge on me. She will be put in a spot so I am going to make it easy for my baby.

Arjun.."

The sweetest voice in the whole world filled my ears and distracted me from my thoughts. I looked up and my breath hitched in my throat. My wife is turning more and more beautiful day by day. She looked like a fairy in that white maxi gown. All I could think about was taking her to our room and have my wicked way with her.

She was standing at the entrance, deciphering whether to step in or not. Oh Baby, you are just not anyone for me to drive you out.

I smiled warmly,"Yes baby?! What brings you here?!"

"You are sending Lily away?!" She asked me in a hopeful tone.

Sending lily away?! I will send anyone  away just to make you happy. When will you get this through that pea size brains of yours that you are my home and I will never let any fucking bitch to break my home.

Sometimes I feel like shaking her vigorously and ask her why she doesn't see what she means to me?! Not love but she is my need, my key to the door of happiness, my priceless possession and what not.

I touched her cheek and she leaned more into my touch,"She is going but not forever. She will come back but I have planned something for that as well." I pried away her hair strands from her angelic face.

"You did this for me?!" She asked me innocently.

For who else baby?!

I held her face between my hands and forced her to look into my eyes,"I will do anything for you and my baby." I said honestly because it's the only truth in all the lies or things I have kept from her. I might be lying or hiding things from her but I will do anything and I mean any fucking thing just to make sure she and my baby are okay.

Tears whelmed in her eyes and she jumped in my arms where I held her protectively. You don't know what you mean to me, Radhika. At the same time, Lily's words gave me a sting. She told me that I love Radhika and that is totally unacceptable. I don't love her it's just something more than lust. That's what it is! Love is for losers not for an ace like me.

Her nuzzling in my neck makes me smile. I caressed her hair and rest my chin on the top of her head. It feels so right when we are together, so close nestled in each others arms. This intimate connection is something beyond physical. It is metaphysical. What I feel for this woman is something I cannot explain or perhaps can never explain but it's true that I will do anything for her. My mom use to say that when you find your perfect girl, you will have eyes only for her and you will walk the earth back and forth just to be with her. I never believed it because staying with just one woman was beyong my level of understanding. Now I don't even get those feelings that will I get bored of her. I know I won't ever get bored of what we have between us. I want to take care of you forever and more than forever!

That reminds me to ask her when was the last time she ate since morning?!

"Did you eat?!" I asked her.

"No I was busy." She replied in a sharp tone.

It puts me off when she talks in that tone but I think I can let go of this once.

I pulled back from our hug," Busy doing what?!" I couldn't hide the ire in my tone.

She looked down at her feet. Is the ground more appealing than your husband's face?!

"I am learning to cook." She said in a coy tone.

Ah, this is some news to me. Radhika cannot cook anything and anything means she can't even make an omelette. It did surprise me in the beginning but then with time, I chose to forget it. Let's just say I didn't wanted to find faults in her. Girls have a very special relationship with kitchen, in my opinion. I guess Radhika proved me wrong because she seems to feel lost in a kitchen as if she is left alone in a remote area but it's a pleasant surprise to see that she is learning to cook. I don't really care if she doesn't learn. I like her anyway.

" You know you don't need to. I am any which ways very impressed." I smirk.

With a roll of her eyes, she replied," Why do you think I am doing this for you?! You are just so self obsessed, Arjun." She remarked.

Self obsessed?! That I am but it's not about me here. If you have forgotten, let me remind you that I was the one who called you a daddy's spoilt princess and you were very hurt by that comment of mine.

"Well I was the one who made this statement that you are a daddy's spoilt princess." I said with a grimace in my tone.

If I have a daughter then will I let her lift a finger in my house?! I don't think so. Though my daughter won't rule my empire but she can rule over me for sure.

Her gaze softened,"Yeah but you never insisted that I should learn after that one day."

Yeah I never insisted because I felt what's the need to do that. Now that you are pregnant, I don't want you to ever work but I am not telling you that.

"I couldn't trust you to not poison my food." I added jestfully.

She smacked my arm," I can still do that." She added with a warning.

"No you won't. You don't want to be a young widow, do you?!" I asked her a rhetorical question.

She stared at me with hurt in her eyes,"Don't talk about dying, Arjun."

Guilt pricked me from inside as well. I thought I was just kidding but I didn't know that this is going to upset her. Otherwise I will never purposely try to hurt her feelings as of now.

"Radhika, I was just...."

She breaks in on me,"I know but I don't like such jokes. I rather die before you than see you dying." She said in an unflinching tone.

She wants to die before me?! I thought she would be praying for my death in her prayers. Does she love me?!

"Why? You love me so much?!" I asked her curiously.

What have I even done to her to fall in love with me?! My subconscious rebuked me. Lily use to say I am too easy to fall in love with. I always told her that she is nuts if she thinks so. I am the perfect example of what is bad and what should be avoided by all the good girls out there. I think one of the reasons I thought love is not for me because I wasn't fit to be loved. My dark soul is too tainted and damaged for love.

She stared at me in a shock as she took in my question. Does it mean what I am thinking is true?! She concealed her shock with a naughty glint that sparkled in her eyes.

"No I am very selfish in that case. I would have to live alone with no partner for the rest of my life. Had I been someone else's wife then..."

With that, she pressed my buttons! Fuck! Woman! In which other language will I have to tell you that I don't like you tagged with other men. Why don't you get it that you are mine and only mine! You will never know other man because I will always be the only man who will touch, hurt and fuck you! When everything is running so smoothly then she has to blow it all up. Stupid, stupid, stupid girl! I won't curse her with abuses as I have promised myself the same.

I gnashed my teeth,"Don't you ever fucking think about being some other fucker's wife.  You are mine, all mine! Do you understand me?!"

The sight of Radhika with some other man will kill me slowly and painfully but not before taking that man's life and Radhika's too! I won't spare her if she ever cheats!

But you laugh it off when she gets upset with your womanizing ways in the past. Shouldn't you be cut her some slack?!

My premature conscience raises it's head. Yeah but that was in the past. I didn't cheat on her from the time we are together, did I?!

You tried! What about what happened in hotel paradise and that day in that club that day?!

Fuck my whole life! It fills me with regret that I actually kissed olivia though she didn't mean anything to me. I killed her but still we started to do it and I pushed her off me. I never confessed this truth to Radhika but I thought she doesn't need to know until and unless I betrayed her. All I know was I was trying to prove myself that Radhika doesn't mean anything to me that day but I miserably failed.

Still Radhika shouldn't utter a word about other men or else she'll have it from me!

I gripped her chin tight," You understand me right?! You better understand or else you know what I will do with you, don't you baby?!" I eyed her with dead fury but my tone was sugar coated.

She nodded her head up and down instantly but what hurt me were her tears that dampened her red cheeks. Without waiting for another second, I loosened my vice like grip.

She stared at me with hurt in her eyes,"You hurt me every time when I trust you." She cried in an accusatory tone!

What hurts is that it's actually truth! I find myself at loss of words so I choose to change the topic.

"You need to eat. Come let's go." I looped my arm around her.

"Arjun, I..."

I fail to rein in my temper,"Shut up! Just shut the fuck up! You don't eat on time and you make me so angry at times and then you start with those fucking waterworks. That's what you women do always! You know nothing better than crying, do you?!" I throw crude words at her face.

She weakly protest," Arjun, please don't shout at me." 

Fuck! I have been advised to keep my voice down when talking to her by the doctor and here I am screaming the whole house down. I am very angry at the moment so I should just leave her alone.

"Fuck this! I am out of here." I say as I shut the door behind me with a bang.

A part of me wants to go back inside and take her in my arms and kiss her tears away but I will just hurt her more if I go back to her. A larger part of me wants to protect her from my ferocious anger. I could hear the sound of sobbing inside the study but the sound got less audible as I walked away. Walking away was hard but I had to do it for her and for me. I think she is the only woman who has made me so angry in my entire life but life will be too plain without her.

I decide to complete my work that was left but the issue is that I left the blue prints inside the study. I start to go back but then I won't be able to resist the temptation of saying something not nice to Radhika. I think torturing my prisoners will be fun so I do that for an hour until I begin to
missing Radhika. Fuck! I am such a sucker when it comes to her. I want to be glued to her hip all the time.

I made my entry inside the room to check up on Radhika but when I saw her laughing heartily with Sam, I was shocked! Am I the only one upset here?!

"Radhika, have you seen my watch?!" I ask her to gain her attention.

She stares at me coldly and walks to me swiftly. She grips my hand and raises it to my eyes," Next time think of something better." Fuck! I was wearing my watch and I asked her if she has seen it. I should have shoved my hand in my pocket.

"Bhai did you guys fight." Sam asks us in her forever nosey tone.

"No." I snapped loudly.

"Yes." Radhika answers at the same time with a scowl!

"Yes or No?!"

"Sammy do you mind giving us some privacy?!" I clench the words through my teeth as I glare at my annoying sister.

"Okay but Bhai be careful." She gets up from the bed to leave and threads to the door when she stops midway," and be gentle, you know she is pregnant." She winks at me.

"Sam!" Radhika turns fifty shades of red forgetting that she was angry a minute ago.

"Sammy, I will be gentle. Thank you for the caution." I answer smugly.

"Nothing of that sort is going to happen, Mister!" Radhika snaps at me pointing her finger at me.

"We'll see that baby. You know you cannot resist me." I smirk as I draw her closer by her arm.

"In your dreams." She gives me a bored look as she tries to pry away from my hold but I hold her tightly.

"Do you know how beautiful you look when you get angry?" I ask her.

"Don't flirt with me." She warns me.

"Ah, this fiery hazel brown eyes will take my life someday." I hit my chest playfully feigning hurt.

"You left me alone, Arjun." She accuses me.

"Well I was just doing the right thing. I didn't want to hurt you in my fury." I justify.

"So when going gets tough, you just leave?!" She asks me in a hurt tone.

Shit! She is close to tears.

"I just..." I pull her hard and fast as I hug her to my chest. She doesn't hug me back instead tries to push me off her. I rub her back to calm her down," Sorry." I whisper as I nuzzle near her ear. If it just takes one word to make her feel any less hurt then I will say sorry to her once, twice and even thrice if required. I, Arjun Mehra, the biggest dick of this country just said sorry! I have never actually said sorry to anyone maybe I must have to my mom in past. I did not like the word much and I feel if you say sorry for the cruel things you do to anyone then you are expected to not to do it again and I wasn't born for grace. I did cruel things, I do them  and I will continue doing cruel things till death. That's the only way I know, that's the only way I have been shown, that's the only way I choose because it choose me when good left my hand in the dark. Darkness consumed me, took me in as I took it in, we were faithful partners until light returned in my life in the form of Radhika. Everything that didn't mattered started to matter now when I know, I care and I care deeply for her happiness and welfare. My whole overview of the world changed exclusively for her.

"So that's how it works for you?!" She broke the hug.

"What works for me?!" I ask her cluelessly.

"First you hurt me and then you make amends." She asked me as she stared at me with those enchanting big brown eyes.

"Radhika, I said sorry." I emphasize firmly. She is now testing my patience. Why can't we just forget this and make love?!

With a swift movement of her hand, she lashed it across my cheek!

For a minute I was frozen not even acknowledging she slapped me. She fucking slapped me!  I held my cheek as I felt the slight pain.

"Sorry Arjun, I slapped you please forgive me." She said in a crass tone.

"Radhika.."

"Just shut up! What you thought I will forgive you and we will be happy the way we were before?! No! Arjun you have hurt me countless times and I still use to forgive you and I hated myself for that but it's become your habit to hurt me now. I don't understand what sadistic joy you get from hurting me in this state when you know I should be happy but you make me cry so much! I hate you for this! I hate you for messing with my life! I didn't wanted a husband so soon and definitely like you! You are not the kind of man I wanted to marry! You never will be! You are no good! You hear me?! YOU ARE NO GOOD! You never will be! You are a despicable monster! You hear me, you are a despicable monster! I hate you from the bottom of my heart! You got my body but you will never have my heart because you don't deserve it!"

Every word, every accusation broke me from inside. I felt so much pain in one moment and suddenly it occurred to me that the flood gates of my tears that were closed all this years, now opened wide! I tasted my tears when they reached my lip. I was crying! I was fucking crying! I pushed her away gently and wiped my tears furiously. I stormed out of the room leaving her behind.

To be continued......