Cole

Ares dropped me off at my car after breakfast. I unbuckled my seatbelt but hesitated to actually leave his car.

"When will I see you?" I asked.

His expression softened. "Soon, little wolf. As quickly as I can manage." I pouted, and he raised our intertwined hands to kiss the back of mine. "It will be three days, or maybe four. And you can always reach me here," he said, using his free hand to tap his forehead.

His voice came through my mind, just as rich as the real thing. "Do not hesitate to reach out for me through our bond, Cole."

I nodded and felt stupid tears welling in my eyes. This wasn't right. New mates shouldn't separate like this, even if it was only for a few days. But it wasn't like Ares had known I was coming into his life. If he had obligations to meet, things he had already signed on for, I didn't have much choice but to respect that. I took in a deep breath and did my best to calm down and hold it together for just another minute or two. "Okay. Four days."

Ares nodded, and I could see the concern in his eyes. "Not a moment more." He released my hand so he could cup my cheeks. He kissed first one, then the other, then sweetly kissed my lips.

If I didn't get out of the car immediately, I knew I'd be a blubbering mess. I didn't want to do that to Ares, not when I could see he didn't like this, either. Before I could think too hard about it, I opened the car door and slid out, shutting it behind me and hurrying to get into my own car. Ares had insisted on paying the entry fee to the parking garage I'd left my car in so he could drop me off here, which was such a kind thing to do.

Tears spilled over and ran down my cheeks. I slid down in the driver's seat so I wouldn't be visible in the mirrors. Ares waited a few seconds before driving away. When the sound of his engine faded, I dissolved into tears. My heart ached, and I let myself feel it. In a few minutes, I'd wipe my cheeks and drive home. But this needed to come out.

Only, I could feel Ares' awareness through our bond. He was checking on me, and I wasn't quick enough to lock up how I was feeling. "I'm still with you," he assured me. "You need only reach for me."

I tried to do some deep breathing to calm down. He was right, I knew he was. But it wasn't the same, having him in my head versus having him in my arms. And with the bond so fresh, it was all hitting me too hard.

I managed to calm down enough to make the drive home. I debated calling Lucia, but it was her birthday and I didn't want to make it all about me. Besides, I had to figure out how I felt for myself. I didn't want anyone else's opinions getting in the way. So, I finally turned on my car and headed straight for my best thinking spot.

My dad and I opened a café when I was sixteen. I mean, technically it was his since he paid for it and dealt with all the bureaucracy that came with running a business. But he always said everything he had would be mine one day, and we had both poured a lot of ourselves into the café in the eight years it had been open.

Dad handled the books and day-to-day management. He also made all of our coffee syrups from scratch and liked to work the register most days, though we also had a few workers helping out. I did most of the baking and helped at the counter sometimes. Since graduating high school, I had worked five or six days per week, rising at an ungodly early hour in the morning to make everything fresh. Today we had Sydney handling the baking since I had arranged not to come in after my night out with Lucia. But no one would stop me from making a thing or two.

I parked and headed in through the back door using the key I always carried on my keyring. As I walked, I let my mind get lost in planning. What would I bake? Scones sounded nice, but maybe something a bit more involved would take my mind off of Ares' absence? Maybe pastries? It would mean having some down time since the dough would need to be in and out of the fridge. But it was easy enough to fill that time with muffins or cookies or whatever.

Mind made up, I put on my apron and let muscle memory take over, starting a pastry dough and getting it chilling. As I moved through the kitchen, my emotions finally settled and I started thinking clearly around the raw and aching mate bond. I thought I heard Ares' voice in my mind saying "Good," though maybe I'd imagined it. Real or not, I relaxed even more.

Yes, coming here had been the right thing. Or, it seemed to be until my dad slipped into the kitchen. I was so focused on stretching my dough thin so I could make strudel with it that I jumped and almost tore it when my dad cleared his throat.

"Don't sneak up on me like that!" I complained.

He put up his palms placatingly. "Sorry, didn't realize you'd be in your own little world back here. Just wanted to say hi. I wasn't expecting you today."

It wasn't so unusual for me to come in on my day off. I didn't like idleness, and as I got older, my friends became less available. Several hadn't stayed in the area after finishing college. Some were already mated with kids. Some of them, I just hadn't done a good job of keeping up with. Regardless, coming into the café always made me feel like I had a purpose, like my time meant something. "Felt like baking," I answered. It was the truth. Just not the whole truth.

He peered at the dough I had rolled out across a whole metal countertop. "What'cha making?"

"Apple strudel." I went back to rolling it out, settling into the conversation. Dad wasn't going to pry.

"Make sure you bring some of that home for me and your gran."

I smiled. It didn't matter how many times they had shown appreciation for my baking; it still felt good every single time. "Sure thing."

Dad clapped me on the shoulder before leaving to go back to the front of the café. I kept working for a while and had just gotten everything into the oven when Dad came running back in. His eyes were wide and there was a lost look to them that made my stomach churn. It reminded me of when Mom was sick.

"Gran had a heart attack," he said. "Do you want to ride with me?"

I heard an odd ringing noise as my mind reeled. I kept enough control over my body to nod and even remembered to shove my keys into my pocket on the way out the door. I had to double back to run to the front of the store and ask Porter, who was working the register, to set a timer for himself to go back and check the oven. I watched him set it, then jogged back to Dad's car. It was already running, and he started backing out of the spot before my seatbelt was even buckled.

We didn't talk. What was there to say? The whole time, I debated reaching out for Ares. But he was out of town and anyway, Dad and Gran didn't even know him... or that I had a mate at all. It would make me feel better to have him with me, but would be worse for everyone else. So, I didn't reach out to him.

It took way too long to get to the hospital and still, I wasn't ready when we got there. Dad led me to Gran's room, which she shared with someone else with only a curtain divider for privacy. I still felt disconnected from everything and was glad Dad was asking the questions I was wondering about. They were still doing some tests. They needed to keep her for at least a couple of days, maybe more.

As I listened, I couldn't tear my eyes off of Gran, who was sleeping in her hospital bed. She was too pale and suddenly looked much older to me. She looked tiny, too, swallowed up by the bed. I gently took her hand and found it was cold. The blanket they had on her was way too thin, and she got cold easily anyway.

"Dad, can I borrow your keys?"

He tossed them at me without question and I drove home, where I packed a bag with everything I thought might help, starting with her favorite blanket. I double-checked the visitor policy on the hospital's website and confirmed that they allowed 24/7 visitors. Then, I packed a bag for my dad, too.

By the time I got back to the hospital, Dad was able to fill in a little more information. The heart attack had been caused by a blockage, which she would need bypass surgery to address. They wanted to wait a few days to let her stabilize first.

My own heart squeezed, and I couldn't bear to look at Gran at all. She was still asleep, and Dad was going to stay the night. I expected he'd want to stay every night until she was out of danger.

"I can handle the café tomorrow," I said. "Don't worry about coming in."

He frowned. "I'm sure we can find someone to cover for me. Porter's been asking for more hours. And if we can't find anyone, then we'll close down for a couple of days."

I shook my head, but had a hard time speaking. I wanted to be here for Gran, but I didn't think I was strong enough. What if something happened? I had already watched my mom die. No more.

Dad's eyes softened and he slowly nodded. "It's your choice."

The understanding he offered me made the tears I had been managing to hold back spill over. I took a few deep breaths to lock that down as best I could and then said, "I'll cover the café tomorrow."

I stayed a little longer, making painfully stilted small talk with my dad. Then, I went home.

Home to a suddenly empty house. It was usually pretty quiet. The loudest it would get was when Gran was watching Jeopardy and turned the volume up way too high so she could hear it. Tonight, the silence in the house was deafening.

I put on some music, but since the problem was in my head, it didn't help much. I ended up laying in my bed for over an hour, trying and failing to go to sleep as my mind played out various disaster scenarios.

I wasn't ready to lose Gran. I never would be, but definitely not now.

I put a pillow over my head, as though that would help anything. It didn't.

Finally, I sat up and admitted defeat. If I stayed here, I'd eventually pass out from exhaustion, but I needed to get to work in a few hours and wanted to be at least somewhat functional. I felt too alone but I didn't want to call any of my friends in the middle of the night.

What I really wanted was to reach out for Ares, but what could he do? He was so far away and basically a stranger to me. Physically being with him was comforting. Even his scent would be comforting. But the idea of reaching out and trying to talk about my problems at one AM when he was away on a work trip? Unthinkable.

It was a shame that the clothes he gave me this morning – or I guess, yesterday morning – had been so fresh. They barely smelled like him at all. Maybe if they did, I'd have been able to sleep.

Then an idea popped into my head. It was the kind of intrusive thought that I usually knew better than to listen to... only, I wasn't in my right head. My emotions were all over the place after the absolutely crazy last twenty-four hours, and I was almost deliriously tired. So, when it occurred to me that Ares' house would be full of his scent, it didn't seem like such a bad idea to get in my car and try to go there. I thought I remembered the way; it had been a fairly straightforward drive. And I knew right where to find the key.

Once the idea caught hold, I didn't bother trying to resist it. And it turned out I remembered the way just fine. It was probably the exhaustion talking, but it felt like only minutes later that I was pulling down his long driveway and parking in the same place he had.

I had to jump up to reach where Ares had tucked the key, but managed to grab it. As I unlocked the door, it occurred to me that Ares had said he ran a security firm. That probably meant he had some kind of security in place other than a simple lock, right? Only I was already swinging open the door, and as soon as I saw inside, any worries about security systems calling the authorities here slipped from my mind.

The house was empty.