SONG: The Neighbourhood - Scary Love

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April Levesque

For our first date, we congregated in the parlour. Mike folded his arms. He had tattoos on his arms, a Crucifix Cross on his back, and Kaison's name on his chest, where his heart was. His dark-brunette locks flopped over his dark ambers, 90s-style. His olive complexion smoothly contrasted with the black clothing. 'You look like a fuck-boy.'

'Excuse me?' said Roy, offended.

'Mike!' Mum scolded how rude that was in Sinhala. 

Mike shrugged. "Just an observation."

"I agree." Dad looked at me and shook his head, disappointed. "You have a bad taste in men."

Ethan sniggered, stuffed his mouth with a tuna sandwich, clearly enjoying the comical scene. He returned from boxing class, explained why his shirt is saturated with sweat and his left, bruised cheek.

I rolled my eyes and zipped my coat as Mum said, 'Can you boys stop?'

'Right!' I agreed.

'This is your first date,' said Aiya. 'We're being cautious.'

Mum put her hands on her hips. 'Were we being cautious when you started dating Makayla?'

'I'm just saying.' Mike did another double-take of Roy. 'He looks sketchy.'

"Looks like he's running from something," Ethan says, voice low and dramatic, then shrugs. "I've been watching How To Get Away With Murder."

Dad murmured, 'He is made quite strangely.'

'I won't lie, Roy,' said Ethan. 'You look like Shrek.'

'That's an insult to Shrek,' said Mike. 'Roy is uglier.'

Ethan pointed the end of his sandwich to Mike. 'The truest shit I ever heard you say, Aiya.'

'That's enough! You're acting like he's not even here!' Mum walked around a sofa and tenderly situated her hands-on Roy. 'Ignore them, my dear. They're always petty like this.'

'Roy,' said Dad. 'I want to test your decency—'

'Julian, not this again,' Mum cut in Sinhala. Roy frowned at the foreign language. He was probably going mental, wondering what on Earth she was saying.

'This will be helpful, Jeromi.' Dad loves literature. He always uses a Shakespeare trick to test a person's morals. He did that with Makayla and was satisfied with her answer. 'Roy.' The blond whipped his gaze to Dad. 'Let's say there are three caskets. One is gold, one is silver, one is lead. A picture of my daughter is in one of them. Which one do you think it is?'

'Gold,' Roy responded with confidence. 

Dad sighed, displeased. "Greedy child."

'Excuse me?' snapped Roy, then suppressed the irritation.

'It was the wrong answer,' explained Mike.

'Okay, and? What's that got to do with her?"

Dad arched his brows. He exchanged a glare with Mike as they telepathically communicated. Dad is a Captain for a reason. 'My daughter has a name. Not 'her'. Your attitude isn't welcome in this household, you hear me? If you use that tone on my daughter ... God have mercy on you. That's all I'm saying.'

"I don't like him, April,' said Mike in Sinhala. 'Throw him out.'

'Tomorrow is garbage day,' murmured Ethan approvingly.

'Well, I like him!' I interlinked my fingers with Roy's. Dad's eyes twitched and Aiya frowned at the contact. Malli rubbed his hands together, ridding the crumbs. 'So you have to get used to him.'

They ignored me. Dad crossed his arms and warned, 'I'm going to let you on a note, kid — if you do something bad, you're dead.'

Ethan drew a finger across his neck. 'Dead,' he whispered dramatically, a cunning, serious gleam in his dark eyes.

'That's enough,' said Mum. 'Goodness, leave the poor boy alone!'

'You're scaring him!' I agreed.

'He should be scared.' Mike neared Roy until the blond had no choice but to look up. 'I've had a good share with guys like you, and I hope you prove us wrong. If you disrespect her ...' Mike lazily shrugged. 'We have a sniper.'

'A sniper?' echoed Roy. 'You mean a gun?'

'We mean a penis,' said Ethan sarcastically. Mum shot a disapproving stare. 'Yes, you idiot — a gun. We have a gun.'

'We're not afraid to use it,' said Dad, 'for obvious reasons ...'

Ethan indirectly cleared his throat, then sweetly smiled at Roy. 'He doesn't mean you,' he teased, then snickered at Roy's paling face. He enjoyed it too much.

'And Ethan,' added Mike, 'can box.'

'He's talented at it,' said Dad. 

"I blacked out after the first strike," Ethan deadpanned. "But, sure, go ahead!"

'So,' drawled Mike, 'you're his punching bag, then your head is our target range.'

'If Mike and I are not around to use it,' said Dad, 'that's fine. April can just shoot you three blocks away.'

'Julian ...' said Mum.

Dad arched his brows at Roy. 'Do you understand?'

Mum rolled her eyes. I would have, too, if I didn't acknowledge that they are hundred per cent capable of their threats. Roy examined the Levesques, ten times more brawny than he could ever be. Especially Dad — he's a walking muscle. At that moment, I pitied him. However, later on, he assumed my family are "talk", and that made me pity him even more.

The rough wind yanks me out of the flashback. The flared lights of the streets cause the dimmed clouds to be visible, showing the soft drizzle.

I left Roy calls, messages and voicemails. I would've gone to the rooftop had I not realised how much I embarrassed myself tonight.

The moon, round and proud, diabolically sneer behind the gloomy sheet. I shudder from a trillion emotions. I have been standing here in the exact spot for a good hour, purposely suffering from the chilliness. This is the exact behaviour I performed the day Mike died — on a road, wondering if the days will get easier, shivering, wailing, hoping something would kill me. A bus. A car. A bike.

"April?"

I whip up from my phone, my blinking blacks congregating with a pair of light hazels and greys. Theo and Jackson, who stabilises his drunk girlfriend from falling. Naila is tipsy. Jasmine is high, eyes bloodshot, struggling to keep her eyes open.

Jackson's wrinkled jeans are not long enough to veil his left leg prosthetic. He opens the door of his blue Maserati, gently putting Ines inside. His twin also jumps in. He tenderly closes the door, swerving to me. He leans against his car, eyes twinkling behind his black-framed glasses. "Everything all right?" he asked, worried.

The pink petals of a prunus spire fall like snow. Staring ahead, my hair curtaining my face, I desperately blink away the tears, despite the challenging thoughts of Roy. "Y—yeah." I clear my throat, shoulders broadening. "Yeah, I'm fine."

Theo knits his eyebrows. The right one has a slit. "You're a shitty liar, you know? You've been crying."

I do a flimsy laugh. "What? Pfft. No. It's the wind. And I've been yawning because I'm ... tired." Wow. That sounded so believable!

"Did something happen?" asked Naila, unconvinced.

"Why are you interrogating me?"

"Roy was pissed," Jackson explains. "I guess you argued with him?"

An argument that could imply an end. My lips tremble at the thought. I fear if I have triggered the end. No. I refuse to accept that. I need to talk to him. I want to talk to him. Soon. But I'm afraid.

The baby hairs on my arms jolt up. Afraid. I'm afraid of my own boyfr — friend. Yes, friend. Wait. No. He's my boyfriend. He didn't say I'm breaking up with you. Neither did I, regardless of the fact that I started the argument in the first place. He just told me to fuck off ... 'bitch'. Still, is it normal to be afraid of your boyfriend? 

Suddenly, I unintentionally recall all the articles I've read for Sociology regarding abuse and violence in relationships — STOP. Roy would never do that. He can't. He would never hurt me. Right?

"Can I be left alone, please?" I almost would've sounded like I begged for it if my voice wasn't surprisingly stable.

My phone screen blackens, the Samsung logo flashing a farewell. Damn it, it died!

As Jackson opens a door to the driver's seat, Theo offers, "You waiting for someone?"

Funny enough, I dialled Mike's number. Then I remembered he's dead. I would call Mum, although she is exhausted whenever she returns home. I'd rather not bother her.

"—to your house."

I blink, realising I zoned out. "Sorry?"

"We can drop you to your house," reiterates Theo.

"My car is full," said Jackson.

"I'll drop you." Theo takes out his car keys. The doors of a red Audi behind him unlock, lights illuminating to life.

"I'll walk, thank you."

"By yourself?" Jackson observes the obscurity of the street. "Hell, no. You could get murdered or raped."

The last word sent a shiver down my spine. Roy was groping me. If I hadn't pushed him off, would he rape me?

"The girls and Tanner will kill us if we leave you alone," adds Theo. As if on cue, Jasmine bangs the window.

"And Edgewater also has a considerable reputation now," says Jackson. "You know, the missing children and women. Sure, it's a few, but I'd rather know you got home safely."

I peer at the street, speckled with lights. Roy's behaviour traumatised me. Knowing myself, tonight stole my ability to walk. I doubt I could get home soon if I did. "Okay. Thank you."

Theo opens the passenger door for me. "Want some ice cream or chocolate on the way?"

***

Half-dead, hair knotted like a rat's nest, patchy cheeks, and eyes as swollen as rotten fruit, my reflection is a stranger. My fingers stroke the hickey on my neck, appalling and sinister.

Leave him, Mike would say. He's not worth it.

You're right. But then Ishaan Shah. Charlotte Marin. Bodie's accusations slither against Mike's ghost. If Roy really hurt them...

I peel off my dress. Nausea snatches me into a tornado—finger-shaped, soft-black bruises bloom on my thighs, as dark as the truth I don't want to face. 

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