There was a long pause on the phone before Ava said anything, and when she did, it was very little information.  "You need to ask Zara about Ethan. I don't want to be caught up in the middle of that drama."

"You know that I can't ask her about him right now.  We are in the middle of trying to fix our relationship. I know that she's been ignoring his calls and that bothers me."

Ava didn't say anything; there was a lot that she knew about Ethan.  But those details were also things that she knew Zara wouldn't want her to repeat.  "I'm sorry, Roman.  I'm not saying a word."

The hair on the back of his neck began to rise, feeling his pulse soar.  He loved Ava and didn't want to be in the midst of a spat with her; yet, taking care of Zara was his first priority.  The aggressiveness of this man let Roman know that he needed to take note.  He knew exactly how to get Ava to talk. Though he hated his next move, it was necessary.

"Ava, I hate to do this but I happen to know a certain missionary doctor that does not know that he has a six-month-old daughter."

"You would do that, Roman?"

She and Trevor had an on-again, off-again relationship for the last five years.  They were supposed to be off when one night of hot sex put them on-again and he shipped out the next day on a medical mission to Afghanistan. Leaving a seed behind who became this beautiful baby named Glory Rose.

She huffed into the phone. "You'd really tell Trevor?"

"You know that is not like me to put you in that position, but if that was the only way that I could get that information you'd leave me no choice.  I deal with bad guys every day.  Something about this guy makes me feel that Zara isn't safe."

Ava's breathing was heavy on the phone. She knew that she couldn't stay mad at Roman, but right now she was pissed.  Ava knew that her decision not to inform Trevor about his child was for his safety.  She'd have enough to deal with whenever he had the next opportunity to come home on leave. An early discovery was a situation she wished to avoid.

Roman broke the silence, "I'm sorry but is there anything less threatening that I can threaten you with?"

"No," she groaned.

"Why don't you just tell him?"

"I don't want him coming home because of me.  He loves his work."

"He loves you more, Ava."

"I know Roman, but I can't.  When we met after he left the military, I knew he was going back to college to become a doctor, but a missionary doctor didn't come into place until Jesus got a hold of his heart.  You know that I am happy that he changed because he was rough cut."  She paused for a moment feeling her own emotions rising.  "I, nor Glory are going to be running around to the ends of the earth with him. I want him happy and not give things up for me.  If I tell him about Glory he'll be on the next plane home and some life might not be saved."

Roman ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head.  He got that - totally got that.  Trevor was one of the most loyal people that he knew.  There was no way he would stay away from Ava if he knew.  "I understand, but I really need your help, Ava."

***

Circular wipes cleared the full-length bathroom mirror from shower fog.  Looking at herself from every angle, Zara shook her head. 'I'm hot,' she said to herself, repeating Roman's words that shot fire through her heart.  Her mind drifted back to what he'd said one terrible day that she struggled with her weight in high school. 'I just wish you could look in the mirror and see what I see. You're golden.' She eyed herself with exacting detail – what am I missing?  If doubt of what Roman said tried to slither in her mind, then his hard member had removed any doubts. "I turn him on – wow."

She ran her hands down the sides of her pudgy body, placing her hands on her hips. "I've always wanted him to have curved-smooth lines."  She recalled the soft caress of his firm hands on her waist as they danced. A teeny-tiny thought pried its way into her mind. Maybe it's never mattered to him.  He told me a long time ago that he wasn't ashamed of my body.  "The way that he touched my breasts – like he worshipped them."  Heat pulsed through Zara. 

An ember of hope floated through the heat.  She turned, gazing at the mistletoe on the showerhead. He made it clear what he wanted and left the challenge hanging.  As she imagined what that would be like fire hit her core. Maybe, Roe - just maybe.

The soft tap at the door startled her. She dried off in a flash and tumbled into underwear and comfortable green sweats. The matching top contained an embroidered Christmas tree on the front.

"Breakfast is ready."

"I'll be out in a second."

After the heated thoughts, Zara leaned against the bathroom door taking time to clear her head.  Then she drew a deep breath and marched out of the room. Only to have her breath snatched away as she laid eyes on him. Today the black sleeping pants were gone, replaced by khaki shorts. Roman's hairy legs bulged with solid muscles. Oh-my-God. From top to toe he was a living piece of art. Zara kicked her brain in gear and walked towards the kitchen.

Roman glanced up from stirring the grits. "Morning, treasure.  Did you sleep well?"

"I did and you?"

"I did." Once Ethan stopped calling.

After what Ava had told him about the man he wanted to wrap his fingers around Ethan's throat and squeeze.  He'd already sent word to his staff to take a deep dive into the man's life. To the point of who was the last person that pinned a diaper on him as a child. Roman found it difficult to mask his anger at that man but had to.  This was his last shot to get Zara permanently into his life and he wasn't going to screw it up. He smiled up at Zara as if nothing was wrong, saying four words that he wanted to be cemented in her heart – "You're everything to me."

The words felt like a warm blanket wrapped around her soul.  She stepped behind him and kissed his back, soaking in the lazy, haze of his perfect cologne. "Thank you, and the same to you."

Zara eyed the spicy bubbling sauce covering the pound of shrimp in the pot. "I can't believe that you made shrimp and grits.  I haven't had that since forever."

"I know," he chuckled. "Since we had fun last night creating old memories I thought this one might do us some good. Mom used to make this every Christmas Eve morning."

"And she used to let us unwrap one gift on Christmas Eve."  Though it was not the day before Christmas, Zara walked to the tree and picked up a gift, sliding it across to Roman.  "You gave me mines last night, so here is one of yours."

He smiled and unwrapped the package.  There was a small black box under the red wrappings.  He lifted the lid and his heart burst.  "My key!"  Roman turned off the grits and rushed over to Zara, embracing her.  If there was ever a sign that Zara was moving forward with the relationship this was it.

Key's had always given them complete access to each other's lives. Zara gave his house key back to him when he married his wife, as she should have done.  He gave hers back at the same time.  A chapter closed in their lives and he knew that Zara could no longer be the closest thing to him anymore.   Zara knew that it would mean the world to Roman to have that key. 

***

After breakfast, she put everything away. Then walked across the room and retrieved her cell from the long mahogany dining table. Shaking her head at the number of missed calls from Ethan. The arrogance of him sending the texts in all caps angered her.  Something in the back of her mind told her that Roman must have seen all the texts.  She remembered putting her cell on the charger next to his side of the bed – he would have seen the flashes.  Please God; don't let him ask me about this now.

Simmering anger brewed beneath the surface of her skin.  The situation with Ethan was another door opened by the string of bad choices caused by the abuse that she'd suffered.  She sat down on the sofa skimming through his belligerence.

YOU OWE ME

YOU CAN'T RUN OUT ON ME

ZARA I KNOW YOU SEE THIS

PICK UP THE DAMN CELL

IGNORE ME BUT I'LL BE HERE WHEN YOU GET BACK

Zara's hands flexed open and shut as rage rose.  When they'd first met he was one of the most decent men that she'd ever met, charming and composed. They'd met through an online dating website.  It wasn't the regular type of swipe site.  This one catered to wealthy people and held out a level of professionalism and protocols that lulled Zara in.

When she and Ethan had their first encounter, Zara knew that she'd finally met a kindred spirit.  He was an older gentleman with striking looks and smooth conversation. Tall with an impressive athletic physique and stylish clothes caught her attention right away. She loved his sapphire blue eyes, thick, salt and pepper hair, and trimmed beard. The first time that they'd kissed the gentle fire reminded her of the man that she loved and had lost.  The thought that she had found the one to replace the void that Roman left in her heart caused all her guards to drop.

Now, Ethan reminded her of a bad nightmare stuck in repeat.  She wasn't afraid of him – at least not yet.  At this point, he was a giant gnat that wouldn't go away.  Zara thumped out a reply - F****  off.