Hands on the railings he was standing on the balcony. I slowly came near him. I could hear my pounding heart beat. Part of me suggested to get away from him. But I choosed to be mum. I let my heart guide me.

"Haan neelamaa she is ok. Wait let me give the phone to her" he spoke and was startled a little seeing me standing besides him. I gave a weak smile while he just handed the phone to me. Is he this much angry that he wasn't able to smile back at me. Did I hurt him this much.

"Bachaaa" neelamaa's  voice bought me back to the reality. "Haan maa" I continued to speak as Neil stepped away. He was getting ready for the sight seeing.

I discussed what I thought of doing to neelamaa. She was mum till I complete. She was shocked when I said what happened this morning. That once again I have hurt myself. "Are u sure Avni. U can't hurt urself again." I could hear the fear in her voice.

"Maa....this is why we are hear. To open up. I have to come away from my shell maa. I love Neil. I really do. And our love will take care of everything. And more over I trust him he can never harm me."

"Saabash bachaa....I know it's hard for u. but my brave daughter thought of fighting instread of sitting still. And today u r going to fight ur inner turmoil and release urself from this pain for ever. Still no one is forcing u for this. Not even Neil. U have to remember that." And I exactly know what she means. She even got to know some psychological factors that never the victim must think that things are being forced on her. But I have enough of brain to understand that these are not been forced. I so want to overcome my fears.
.....................

The whole safari was a silent one only looking through the woods for deers and elephants. Neil spoke nothing to me unless it was mandatory. And that broke me more. Why am I giving this pain to u Neil. Why can't we break our marriage. At least by that way u can get free.

"Avni eat" I heard Neil's voice and looked up at him. I have lost my appetite long before. My eyes pooled seeing him not making an eye contact with me. We were in the restaurant having our lunch. In a quite silent way. That was unusually strange for me and foreign too.

"Did I hurt u" I asked this time louder only to meet his confused eyes.
"No" he replied with a faint smile. And I already knew that he was trying to convince me the same which is not the truth. I pressed my hands over his to which he shuddered before taking it off.

"What are u doing" he asked shockingly. I saw fear in his eyes. I immediately withdrew my attention towards the untouched food.

"U can divorce me" I said now without meeting his eyes. I could no longer standby his helplessness. That hurts me a lot.

"How many time should I say u Avni. Leaving u is the last thing I want. I sometimes just wish that u have some trust in my love. don't u think I am worthy for that" I gasped......that's not what I meant.

That's it. Now it's my turn to help myself out of the insecurities. How come I can miss him in my life. That will be the last time I would ask him to leave me. Some new sort of determination entered into me. And I was completely unaware of its intentions. But I chose to adopt it for our betterment.

"Avni" he called me out seeing no response from me. I smiled at him leaving him confused and started to hunt down the food as an manic. I heard him frown for my reactions. I mentally chuckled at his funny face. Just few more guts and everything will be alright, my inner consciousness was speaking to me. I smiled warmly at it.

"Can we speak?" he asked as he sat beside me. We were in our tree shed sitting over a wooden platform. He sat beside me while I placed my head over his shoulders. He didn't step aside but yet firmly didn't touch me. I looked at him to see whether he continues. But he was silent. Was he hesitating?

"Is something bothering u Neil." I asked still on his arms grabbing his left hand in support as I snuggled more close to him.

"Yeah. I mean no" he fumbled.

"Just let it out."I hate it when he does that with me.

"Can I say something" I presumed as I saw no development on his side.

"Yup" he said silently.

"U were the only one with whom I felt safe about. Ur touch will never hurt me. But I had a strange nightmare last night after we kissed. I know I spoil the moment pushing u away and drifting to sleep. Because I faced the worse in my dreams. In that I got the flashes of images of a strange man who was touching me over there. And that made me rush to the bathroom to clear myself. I had no control over it neil." I confessed honestly. He didn't say anything. I raised my eyes to see his to be closed. He took his hand away from my clutches and encircled over my shoulders pulling me closer.

"Say something" I couldn't bear his silence. I just couldn't.

"I love u" he said peeking my forehead. I sighed in relief. He became normal. As normal as we were before. Did he forgive me. Naah.....I don't know... I am not sure about it.

"Can u do that again." I asked shamelessly. I want to feel him now. I just want to erase that past memories and feel him on me. I bloody want to forget everything now. He felt uneasy and stood to leave. He sensed and yet chose to reject it. But why.

"Do u think I am not ready" I asked him directly.

"U r not weak avi......u just need some time." He believed me. But choosed to stay away for what. To protect me from what ever thoughts that are haunting me. No they are haunting me because I am choosing it to. And now I am no more going to accept it.

I stood now to meet him. Looked deep into his eyes. I couldn't find the emotions in it. What am I doing.
.............................

Avni moves her head closer to Neil. He stands still frozen, from both fear and excitement. Fear of hurting her again and excitement of her fighting against it. She leans in, so her foreheads rests against his. They close their eyes. Both their breaths are shaking.

"Thank you," she says in barely more than a whisper. 
"For what?" He replies, his voice low and husky as he could feel her hot breathe over his lips.
"For being you." Her voice wavers, exhilarated from the tension between them. the tension of their proximity.

Avni gently leans in and kisses Neil's warms lips. They pull apart and take shaky, shallow breaths. Neil's eyes were wide open now only to see her flushed face. Her Beetroot red colour cheeks were glowing in the moon light. The only source of light over there. And his eyes darkened while her stomach we're doing somersault as her body was foreign to this feelings.

Unable to contain themselves anymore, Neil holds Avni's head in his hands and pulls her into a fiery and passionate kiss. Her hands work their way around his body, feeling each crevasse, each line along his perfect physique. she clutched his torso giving an soft massage on his shoulders with another hand she went weak on her knees. Her legs were urging to shut closer as she started to feel wet down there. Was his mere ministration turning me on,she Wondered.

She lies on her back as he matches her body's form. The initial hesitations of Neil was long gone and he was widely turned on as she divinely surrendered.

Neil's hands venture over her curved body, exploring as she was morning in his touch. They pull apart and open their eyes. They stare at each other, deep into each other's eyes.

Neil's full of wonder and love, Avni's full of curiosity and passion. No words are spoken but a story worthy of them is communicated. 

"Are u sure" he asked one last time before losing all his stability to control.
Avni leaned up to meet his lips again peaking his lips softly while chewing his lower lips.

He immediately drift off as Avni completed and Neil leans in and softly kisses up and down Avni's neck. She lets out little whimpers of anticipation.

Neil works his way back to her tender, smooth lips. As they kiss she rolls him over and lies on top of his strong, muscular body. She runs her lips up his neck and lands a loving and intense kiss on his lips. She let out sweet love bites over his stubble and descended down to mark many on the way her lips travelled while Neil's hands went to the Zip of her top.

Without wasting another second he remover the top of her body and flipped their position. Avni succeeded in tearing his cotton kurta which was way easier to be damaged under her horny touch. Neil helped her in removing the remaining clothes too and axes his off himself.

He took it the protection as he knelt naked in front of her to counter the activity. Avni closed her eyes while her hands clutched the bedsheet as she tried her best to ignore the threatening fear that may overtake her mind anytime. But Neil slowly took her hands away from the bedsheet cluster and placed it on his back which she holded Immediately.

"Scratch me baby. Scratch me as I give u the bliss of pleasure at each stroke. Show me how much tight I am making u down there as I make u come for me" Neil whispered seductively over her ears.

"Wait till the pleasure over takes the pain and I will make sure that u not walk straight for a week now" he winked as he bit her ears while she shuddered under his ministration.

"All URS Mr. Khanna. Show me how that feels like"she winked with equal naughtyness as he kissed her and the world fell away. It was slow and soft, comforting in ways that words would never be. His hand rested below her ear, his thumb caressing her cheek as their breaths mingled. She ran her fingers down his spine, pulling him closer until there was no space left between them and she could feel the beating of his heart against her chest.

He entered without warning but she was unable to shreik as her mouth was kept shut with his. He kissed fiercely as he pushed more into her breaking her hymen. Tears rolled down her eyes in pain but his kiss diverted her from concentrating on the fire lit down there.

He was distracting her good till she adjusted to his rythmn. As soon as she felt to enjoy it her hips started to move against his to meet the deep penetration if possible. Soon she felt an strange feeling engulfing her as she went in high due to his fast pace while he felt her wall getting tightened.

"Come for me avni." He whispered as she let out a loud shreik experiencing her first climax. She was exhausted and pacing heavily as her chest heaved under the braces while he was still inside her. But he stopped stroking till she breathes normal. Sweetness adorned her forehead and she smiled at him contently showing him how amazing that was.

"Can I finish mine it will take few minutes" he asked permission to her to continue as he felt her to retain her normal breathe. All she could do was to nod and that made him continue till he was in the verge of coming.

Climaxing yet another time Avni panted heavily as Neil lied besides her. Avni turned to look at him while he pulled her into his embrace.

Duet adored their bodies as Neil made her wear a fresh shirt of his and they both drifted into a deep slumber due to the tiresome night.

In the world of marital rapes he made her overcome her fear of sex.

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Prinku💖