"You were supposed to keep her safe!"

"I was!"

"Really? Does that look like keeping her safe to you? She's bleeding from her head!"

"I-."

"Enough! Both of you, out of this room, now! Lenna, bring me that water."

Visions of sand were the first thing that I started to remember. Was someone dragging me? Was that blood dripping onto the sand? Next it was somehow getting into Kam's speeder. Flashes of hyperspace. His voice cutting in and out, telling me to stay awake. I don't think I stayed awake.

Something wet pressed against my head. Hissing, I tried to turn away from the pain.

"Easy, TJ. You're okay, you're back at base. I need to clean that cut." That was Regris' voice, I was pretty sure, anyway. No one else had such a deep voice.

"Cut? You call that a cut? It's a gash, I can see bone!" That was Axon. He sounded frantic. Cracking an eye open, I could just make out Lenna pushing him out of the room.

Regris kept patting my head with the cloth in his hand, and each time I tried to turn away from it. Fuck, that hurt. My head hurt bad. His hand gently took the other side of my face, holding it still. "Lenna- yes, thank you. Now get those patches ready. We need to apply them quickly so they can stop the bleeding." He handed off the dirty rag and took the fresh one from her hands. I shut my eyes tightly before he even touched it to my skin. "I know, I'm sorry. I'm almost done." His voice sounded farther away, he must have turned his head. "Lenna, bring me that black box. Yes, that one. I'm going to give her something for the pain."

No, I don't like drugs. I tried to speak but my voice wouldn't work. My throat felt like sandpaper and my tongue was heavy in my mouth. I felt a prick on my arm at the same time as something cooling was pressed to my forehead.

"There we are, that should help."

I thought he said something else after that but I couldn't understand the words. The blackness was pulling me back under and I didn't have the energy to fight it.

My head was pounding so hard my teeth hurt. Groaning, I raised my hand to rub it.

"Whoa, easy. I don't think you really want to do that."

Cracking my eyes open, I noted the dim lights and the purple blanket over my legs. I was in my room on the Phoenix. Turning slightly, I registered Kade's face.

He smiled softly, "Hey, sunshine. Was wondering when you were going to wake up."

Groaning again, I started to push myself into a sitting position. He jumped up, putting his arm around my back to help. My head started to spin the second we stopped moving. "Ow."

"Yeah, I bet." His arms left my waist. "Let me get you some water."

Water. Yeah, that sounded like a brilliant idea. He brought a cup to my lips and the cool liquid felt like an ice pack on my sore throat. After he set it down beside me, I coughed to clear my throat. Once it felt like I could actually talk, I tried to give Kade a smile. "Thank you."

"How do you feel?"

I pinched one eye closed, as if that helped ease the pounding in my head. "Like I was hit by a speeder."

"Not far off. Apparently a piece of the guard tower hit you like a spinning top. You're lucky it didn't take your head off."

Noting the anger in his voice, I sighed into the pillows. "Don't be mad at Kam. He didn't do anything wrong."

"But you're-."

"It was my own fault. I used too much energy placing the bomb...I didn't realize..." I took a deep breath. Why did it feel so hard to talk? Talking didn't usually use so much energy. "I could barely crawl, let alone stand. I just didn't get out of the blast zone fast enough."

"I should've been there...I'm supposed to protect you."

Turning my head against the pillow, I watched him put his head in his hands. His fingers dug into the curls on his head; knuckles turning white. Reaching out, I laid my hand on his arm and waiting until he looked at me. His brows pulled down and his hazel eyes filled with emotions I wasn't prepared for. Swallowing the thickness in my throat, I squeezed his arm. "This isn't your fault, Kade. Even if you had been there, there wouldn't have been anything you could've done. This is on me."

His head started to shake back and forth. He dropped his hands and leaned closer. Taking my face in his hands, more gently than he should've been capable of, he touched our noses together. "I thought we were going to lose you." His eyes slid closed tightly. "You lost so much blood."

Swallowing, trying to clear the lump in my throat, I reached up to brush the few curls out of his eyes. They snapped open to look at me. Licking my lips, I took a deep breath, "I'm right here. I'm okay." This close, I could pick out all of the little colors in his eyes. Flecks of gold glittered throughout the deep brown.

His eyes shifted back and forth; his fingers flexed against my cheeks. His lips parted.

A knock on the door broke us apart. Kade jumped back, knocking into the chair he had been sitting on. His chest rose and fell quickly.

Regris poked his head in, smiling when he saw me sitting up. "You're awake! Brilliant, I was just coming in to check on you. How are you feeling?"

As he walked in and took the spot that Kade had just vacated, I couldn't help but watch Kade run a hand through his hair before leaving the room. He gave me a final look before shutting the door behind him. Sinking against the pillows, I groaned as Regris continued to ask questions.

After two days laying in bed, I was quickly loosing my mind. Regris wanted me to stay in bed for as long as possible, or at least until the gash on my head had closed. Thanks to high-tech med supplies he had access to, the cut was quickly healing. But I also had a decent concussion and needed to rest.

But I had just about enough of the word "rest" for the remainder of my days. So when Kam poked his head into my room, I was more than happy to sit up. "What's up? Need my help?"

He fought a smile from forming on his lips, "Little bored in here?"

I sighed dramatically, falling back into my pillows. "I'm going to die in here."

"Fortunately for all of us that's not true."

Looking to where he still stood by the door, I sighed as I sat back up. "Kam...it wasn't your fault. I don't know how many times I have to say it for it to get through your thick skull."

"Maybe it wasn't my fault but you didn't carry yourself to the ship and think you were going to bleed out before we ever got here."

Biting my bottom lip, I nodded. "Yeah, I know that feeling."

He opened his mouth to say something but then snapped it shut again. After taking a deep breath, he ran his hand through his hair. "I know you do. But, uh, I didn't come here to argue about that. There's someone here who wants to talk to you. He's in the bunker." His expression showed his nerves when I looked at his eyes.

There was only one person who he could be referring to. Stealing my own nerves, I took a deep breath before getting out of bed. I would've been concerned if I looked okay but after spending days in bed with a head injury I couldn't care less. Walking to the door, Kam snagged my wrist before I could get far. I had to look up from this angle - I only came to his shoulder.

"Just...hear him out, okay?"

I wanted to snap at him, say something snarky about how I wasn't exactly the one at fault here. But then I suddenly didn't have the energy for it. Maybe he was right - I did kind of owe my father that much.