*Matt's POV*

The thoughts that went through my head last night:

It was all her fault. The way she did everything was her fault. If she would have gotten control of Shawn, this never would have happened. If she would've just done the one thing she's good at and pestered him, i'd still be with Alicia and she wouldn't have a messed up nose.

That was pretty funny though.

We were in love and i totally understand that but that's not a reason to do what she did. But, i also understand that she would never have expected Shawn to expose us, because i didn't either. But, then again, he is dating that one chick, Ali, i think? This kids just full of surprises.

When i left Autumns last night, i went to the first person i thought of: Cameron. We've been off lately but i don't care, that's my man. I spilled everything to him when i got there and he had the nerve to ask me what i want. Like i know.

"Look, we were close back in the day when you and Autumn were a thing and-" I interrupted him.

"We weren't 'a thing', we were together, there's a difference."

He sighed and shook his head. "Focus, Matt." I nodded. "And i could tell that you guys really liked each other, that y'all were in love. She made a mistake and did something terrible and kissed somebody not worth her time-"

"She literally kissed your best friend," I butted-in.

"Matthew, shut up and don't ever talk again. Plus, Nash's blue eyes are insatiable." He fluttered his lashes.

I chuckled and then straightened my face, "Quit."

"Anyways, nothing even came from that. Plus you guys cheated on your significant others a year ago, as you told me."

"I never said the such. Her and Shawn were never a thing and Alicia and i had just begun." But still, we did cheat nonetheless.

He hitched his eyebrow up.

i sighed. Autumn's still my whole world and i would love to spoil her more than anything. I just want her on my arm again, to feel her touch. I want to see her throw her head back and laugh as she always does. I want to see her huge smile that always made me weak in my knees. I want to be the reason she does these things. I want her even more than i've ever wanted anybody, including Alicia. And it sucks seeing her give heart eyes to Shawn when she doesn't even know what she wants. But it just makes me want her even more. So, Cameron is right. I'm still deeply in love with her. And i know right now that i have to talk to her. That i have to let her know my true feelings. "Thanks, Cam. I appreciate the advice." I kissed him on the cheek. After realizing i kissed him, i drowned my mouth in milk.

I got home that night with a smile on my face. Autumns beauty surrounded my vision as i fell into a deep sleep.

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*Autumn's POV*

I get to school and immediately regret it. There, standing right in the middle of my parking space, is Nash. The infamous Nash Grier. The one who broke me and Matt. Psychopath.

"Well, well, well," He says walking towards my car. "If it isn't Miss Fall." That stupid smirk, it's just so stupid, it doesn't even drive me crazy.

"Autumn, thank you though." He appears at my window. "I would appreciate it if you got out of my spot so, you know, i can actually graduate and become a successful human being, unlike some people." I look him up and down.

At first he looks offended, but it quickly fades into amusement. "Aww poor little princess having a bad morning." he puckers his lip.

i scoff, "Even if i was, it's not like it's any of your concern. Now bye bye." I shoo him away and, to my surprise, he listens.

I park and, you wouldn't believe it, Matthew Espinosa is waiting by my locker when i walk into school. I just unlock it as if he wasn't even there. He appears from behind the door.

"So, we should talk." This dumb kid.

"Oh, wow. Nice to know that you're not as dumb as the stick i thought you were." i put a 'gleeful' face on.

"Actually sticks are pretty-"

"We'll talk at lunch, you're my only friend anyway." i shrug and stalk off.

So, here's the thing: I do not like school very much after drama. Oh, no, no, no. I stay home and pig out on ice cream, usually. I don't know why i didn't. I mentally call myself stupid as i step into my class. i look up to everybody staring at me. "Nice of you to join us, Miss Lynn. Have a seat anywhere you'd like." This is ironic because, you know, there's only one seat available and, woohoo, it's directly next to Shawn. I would honestly rather sit next to Alicia at this point. The universe does not like me right now.

He averts my eyes as i sit down. The teacher continues the lesson.

"13 minutes."

I look around me because i know Shawn doesn't wanna be talking to me right now.

"You were 13 minutes late." definitely Shawn.

"I lost track of time" is all i say. He doesn't respond.

Ole, sweet Ms. Hallot. How she just loves to talk. I drift off to angles and theorems, i think.

*****

I wake up to a bright light above my eyes. Beeping. Sobbing. "Sissy?"

"Alex," I say groggily, trying to sit up. I feel a sharp pain in my right abdomen and spurt out an exaggerated wince.

Suddenly, someone is at my side, "Woah, slow down, Auttie." Shawn. The only person who calls me that.

"Shut up, Paul," i hate it when he calls me that.

He throws his head back and laughs, "Touché." He grabs my hand, "Glad to have you back." That smile.

"Where's Alex, I just heard her." I look up, frantically. But my vision is blurred so i can only see outlines.

"She's right here, Autumn. Don't worry, she's safe."

i breathe a sigh of relief as a small hand fits perfectly inside mine. I squeeze it. "I love you, Sissy."

"I love you, too, A." A tear slips down my cheek.

I can hear Shawn shuffling through something. "Can you do me a favor, sweetie, and go get a nurse? While you're at it, just get yourself something to eat. Make sure to stay with my parents though, okay?"

I can basically hear her face light up. "Okay, Bubby." Her feet hit the floor and she's gone.

"My parents have been keeping a good eye on her for tonight." Shawn tells me.

"What about mom and dad? Why aren't they watching her?" I ask, wiping my eyes. I look at Shawn, his head is down. Well, my visions back, yayyy. "Shawn? What happened to my-"

A nurse walks in and i hear Shawn breathe a sigh of relief. "I'm Nurse Ratchet, i'll be checking everything out and trying to the best of my abilities to answer your questions." She holds out her hand to Shawn and he gingerly shakes it.

I decide to intercede before she can go further. "Where are my parents and why aren't they here?" i try to sit up which causes my legs to tense up and i shriek in pain.

"Miss Lynn. You need to calm down." Ratchet says. Then Shawn: "Autumn, be still, you're gonna reopen the wound."

"What wound, what happened? Answer my god damn question, oh my god." i say, relaxing underneath the pain.

He looks at the nurse, a silent plea obvious in his eyes. She nods her head. "Autumn, your parents aren't here."

"Oh really? Because i didn't know that." I roll my eyes.

"Please, be serious." She rests her hand on mine. "Your parents were unable to make it to the hospital. I'm not sure if you remember much from last night, but your parents were found dead at your home. Your mother was shot in the chest, said to have been alive after impact for approximately 2 minutes. Your father was shot in the head, died a couple of seconds after the bullet hit his skull. Luckily, Austin was out with some friends and Alexandra was at the babysitters house. We also found your parents' killer, outside your front door, unconscious. Thanks to Shawn over here, he hit the killer with a baseball bat and rushed you to the hospital as fast and as legal as possible before you could bleed to death. When you got here, we were told you were shot in the thigh, bleeding out for a few minutes. The bullet, unfortunately, hit an artery." She pulls out a piece of paper and shows it to me. "This is likely to be the condition of your leg."

I read the paper out loud.

"The most important factors to consider with a firearm injury to the extremities are the possibility of vascular and nerve injuries, compartment syndrome, fractures and knowledge of the type of weapon used. Artery and nerve injuries are the major causes of mortality and long-term morbidity in extremity gunshot wounds.

"Although low-velocity injuries from handguns account for the majority of extremity injures in the civilian population, high-velocity wounds and shotgun wounds have the greatest potential for devastating injury, largely because they have a higher percentage of kinetic energy transference, have a higher degree of wound contamination, have a higher risk for compartment syndrome, and more often have associated comminuted fractures with devitalized bony fragments. Shotgun injuries, overall, have been found to have twice the mortality rate of rifle or handgun wounds."

I'm stunned, truly. I don't understand. I guess it's obvious because Ratchet says, "Luckily, you were shot by a lower-velocity handgun, although still high. Due to the gun chewing your artery, we had to put you into surgery as soon as was possible. We sowed an artificial artery, also called a Dacron artery, in between the two ends. It was a very successful surgery and, again thanks to Shawn, you're going to live. Your leg may take up to 8 months to heal, but it'll heal nonetheless." The nurse smiles. "Of course, there'll still be some pain when doing some things even after it's healed up." (keep in mind that none of what was just said is 100% accurate).

I sit there. I look at Shawn, and i break. The nurse leaves the room as he lays down next to me and i nuzzle my head into his chest. "My life is over."

*****

I come back to reality, looking at my desk, pencil in hand, and my vision fuzzy. My papers wet. "Are you okay?" I hear Shawn ask.

"I'm fine, i just got something in my eye," I wipe my face.

"You were out for a good 30 minutes," he says.

"Okay." I force out.

The bell rings & everybody leaves. Me and Alex were put into the custody of my brother after everything happened. He was 18. He moved back home and took care of us. Then he got into drugs and took care of nobody, not even himself. I was left to fend for me and Alex so i got a job. I work at a ranch, the best i can do. I get 13 dollars an hour, though, so i can take Alex wherever she wants. But nothing's the same as it was before.

I slam my tray down across from Matt. "You have until the bell rings to tell me what you need to tell me."

He checks the time, just 20 minutes. "That should be enough time."

I wait.

He hesitates. "About last night . . . I'm really sorry. I'm not very stable right now. With everything . . . Anyways, i just wanna say i'm sorry. It was uncalled for and i was an asshole. You didn't deserve it. You've never deserved it."

We sit in silence for a few minutes, the only sound an occasional smack or gulp. "Is that it, Matt? Is that what i've been waiting for?" I take a drink of my soda.

He puts his hands together and places them on the table. "Well... not exactly."

"Okay well you don't exactly have enough time so you should hurry up and tell me before i leave." I spit.

He looks me straight in the eyes, sighs, and then says it, "I still love you, Autumn."

I do the only thing i can think of. "Ding ding ding. Oh, look, the bells ringing, gotta go." I stand up and grab my tray.

"Autumn, wait. Come back, please." I ignore him. "Please, just say something." I turn around.

"Fine." Letting my tray drop, i walk over to him to make sure he hears me loud and clear. "You want me to say something? Let me say this: You wanna say that everything that happened with Alicia and with me and you is my fault, go ahead. I'm not stopping you. But you can't do that and the next day confess your still undying love for me. It's just not something a normal human being does. It's just not something a normal Matthew Espinosa does." And with that, i stomp away.

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a/n : if you ever have any ideas , just pm me and i'll take them into consideration:))