I've realised a key thing

That I never knew before

Fake smiles

Will never be real

They're a fake comfort

A pretence to be strong

Over pain and sadness

Which comes in huge waves

That washed me over

Drowned me

Leaving me barely

Alive

I was never good enough

With depression flooding over me

And Anorexia pulling at my strings

Until they were cut

I was trapped

And couldn't stop

I thought

It would last forever

This crazy dream

To be the skinniest of all

Lighter than air

What was I thinking

I might have been afraid to go back

To the girl I was

But now I am proud

And want to be her, once again

And the most important thing is

That I came to remember

And realise

The only person who could save me

Was myself.