Point of View: Patton, First Person
Timeline: Present Day, Deceit and Pax/Will are talking to Thomas about Joan, Ollie and Daisy are captured in the Dark Palace, Virgil is MIA with FG, and Patton is with Logan (who is unconscious at the moment) and Sparks (who is doing her absolute b e s t)

I bit my lip as Logan laid unconsciously on the floor.  He was still glitching a bit - his body occasionally twitching and flicking in an out of sight.  Sparks was whimpering worriedly over Logan and licked his hand in an attempt to be helpful.  In the end, she settled merely for lying her head on Logan's stomach, silent.

And I...

Well I was a disaster.

"Gosh, Pat," I muttered to myself, shifting Logan's head in my lap.  "Gosh, Pat.  Why didn't you just explain it to him?  Why didn't you just explain why you had to cut him off..."

"I shook my head, taking a step backwards.  "I can't do that.  Feelings... They don't work like that, Logan."

"Why not?" Logan whispered, voice so broken that I had to look away.  "I - I've been trying, and trying - why are you determined not to forgive me?  I can't - I can't TAKE this, you being so - so MAD with me all the time -"

"I'm not mad at you."

Logan blinked, confused.  "Y-You're not?" he stuttered, eyes blinking quickly.

"Yeah, I'm mad... really mad.  But... no, I'm not mad at you.  Just... I dunno," I whispered, eyes falling shut and hold Sparks closer to my chest.  That didn't even sound strong to my own ears.  "I guess I'm just - just disappointed.  In that you saw me as some helpless guy that needed your protection and that I am too - too... emotional to make smart decisions.  That I... I was stupid... in your eyes."

"Oh, Patton.  I don't think that you're st-"

"Really? Cause I'm having a pretty hard time believing it," I muttered, uncharacteristically dark and I watched Logan wince at my tone.

"Patton," Logan's expression looked pained.  "I didn't want you to go because - because I was selfish and I didn't want to lose you as well," he admitted, taking a step towards me.

I stood there, shell-shocked, as Logan ran hand through his hair - sighing loudly and looked up at the ceiling.

"You mean so much to me, so much Patton.  The idea of losing you... I - I don't know what I would do without you.  And not just because Thomas's needs you, but because I need you," Logan took another step forward.

"You are Thomas's moral compass - but you're so much more than that, a part of Thomas.  You're sweet and kind and loyal and trusting and you forgive people... even those that don't always deserve it," Logan expression turned guilty.

"You are so unabashedly yourself.  And you always fight for what you believe is right and I'm sorry for keeping from being yourself.  I - I love you, Patton.  And I couldn't bear if - if Incubus d-did s-something t-t-to you, if - if he h-hurt -" Logan cut off abruptly, hands in fists at his eyes and holding his breath.  He wasn't blinking - eyes fixated his shoes, occasionally flickering to his own.

"Lo," I whispered, gently lower Sparks to the floor and walking towards him, taking his clenched fists in my hands.  I gave his hands a quick squeeze.  

"If - If you had been in Roman's shoes," Logan choked out, eyes watering.  "If s-something had happened to you, I - I would never be able to live with myself," Logan whispered, eyes flickering up to meet my own - tears already making a track down both my cheeks.  "I couldn't let you go, I couldn't watch that happen to you.  A-And I don't regret it, and I'm so sorry that I don't regret it, but I can't lose you Patton, I can't.  And... I think higher of you than even you could possibly imagine.

Logan suddenly groaned, his hand flying to his temple.

"Oh my gosh!" My hand flew to my mouth in surprise.  "Lo? Logan, are you awake?"

Logan grunted in return, eyes slowly blinking open.  "Ow," Logan deadpanned.

"Oh goodness! I'm so glad that you're okay!" I tackled Logan in a hug, freezing when Logan let out a grunt of pain and quickly pulling back.  "Sorry," I apologized, cheeks flushing in embarrassment.

"It is... quite alright,, Patton," Logan said, sitting up.  Sparks barked happily, spinning in a happy circle.  She licked Logan's face affectionately.  Logan didn't exactly appreciate it, face scrunching up as he struggled to get to his feet.

I stood up with him, throwing his arms over my shoulders to make sure he didn't fall.  "Are you sure that you're alright?"

"Yes, I am," Logan nodded.  He struggled to get his balance for a moment, but was able to stand without his knees buckling.  "That was... quite the experience," Logan explained vaguely.

"What happened to you?" I asked, forehead scrunching in concern.  "Why did you - you start doing that?"

"I'm not entirely sure," Logan admitted.  "I would like to make a few more observations before I gave you even an educated guess.  Though, I'll admit it did put some things in perspective," he added absently.

"What kind of things?" I asked.  Sparks seemed much happier that Logan was okay, sniffing his knees decisively before settling at his feet as if she decided to become his personal guardian.

Logan hesitated.  "That I hate fighting with you.  And I'm tired of the back and forth, I'm tired of it all.  I love you, Patton, and I'll tell you a hundred times until you believe me.  And I hope that you love me in return, of course," Logan added.  "But I need you, Patton.  I love you so much that it almost hurts to breathe.  You just make me... better.  What do I have to say to convince you to become my boyfriend? I'll say anything, I will," Logan begged, taking hold of my hands.  "I'm just so tired of this terrible back and forth.  Please?"

I let out a frustrated sigh, pushing Logan away.  "I don't want you to need me, Logan.  I want you to want me.  And I - well, of course I love you, Logan, you know that," I stubbornly crossed my arms over my chest.

"Then why are you holding back?" Logan debated, just as frustrated and shoving his bangs back.  "We both have feelings for each other so why do we have to keep going through this painful cycle of being vulnerable and then pushing each other away?  Why can't we just be happy together?  What are we waiting for?  The longer we wait, the less time we'll have together."

"I don't want to push you away, Logan," I confessed.  "But I am not so blinded by my feelings for you that I ignore the fact that you just aren't ready for a relationship," I argued.  "I won't do that to you - to us."

"Do you not believe me?" Logan almost seemed panicked, frantically trying to find a solution to a problem he couldn't even begin to understand.  "Patton, you know that I'm not lying, I love you I swear - "

I cut Logan off.  "You don't have to convince me, Lo.  I know that you are being genuine," I smiled softly, trying to reassure him.  "But..." I trailed off, biting my bottom lip nervously.

"But?"

"Your idea of love... isn't love," I explained gently.  "Your idea of love, the picture of love that you've created in your head... it's toxic and unhealthy.  Needing me first, and loving me second isn't love.  Wanting to kept me safe so badly that you take away my freedom...that isn't love either.   A relationship between the two of us would only end up hurting people - and not necessarily only us."

Logan looked expressionless, but trembling in his fingers gave it away.

I reached down and cupped both of Logan's cheeks affectionately.  "There's no rush for us.  But you needing me... that isn't healthy.  I want whatever it is between us to be love and be good for the both of us.  And I won't condemn the both of our hearts to breaking by ignoring all the red flags."

"Is there nothing I can do to fix this?" Logan whispered.  "I - If there was a something I could do, if I could just love you harder, wouldn't that be enough?  I just want - I want us, please, I want to love you," Logan closed his eyes, trying to stop the tears from slipping out.

"Not always, Lo," I pressed a loving kiss to Logan's forehead.  "Happiness isn't permanent.  But if it's any comfort, there is hope for us.  This isn't me saying no forever, just for now.  Please hold onto that until you're ready, okay?"

"... Patton, I am so sorry," Logan murmured softly, a stray tear slipping out.  "I didn't even realize... I didn't think..."

"It's okay," I smiled, brushing the tear away.  "Don't blame yourself, okay? We both are to blame here.  I have my own things to work on.  We both need time to... learn," I encouraged.  "And grow."

Logan hesitantly grabbed Patton's hand.  "You're just saying no for right now - not forever, right?" He confirmed.

I smiled sweetly.  "Not forever," I agreed.

"So... Someday?"

"Someday," I agreed, eyes lit up with excitement.

A bright light abruptly killed the conversation and the both of us winced and turned away from the blinding light.  When the light faded - and the both of us were trying to blink spots out of our vision - Pax and Will were left standing there, holding hands.

"That snake!" Will yelled angrily, holding tightly to Pax's hand.  "Oh, that next time I see him I'll show 'em!" Will's cheeks were bright red in anger and I couldn't help being briefly concerned about the side we had just set free.

"No harm was done," Pax turned towards the both of us - his voice much more calm and reassuring.  "Everything is going to be fine," he explained vaguely.

"He's a slimey boi!" Will protested dramatically.   "What, are we just supposed to let him get away with that?!"

"We took care of it, everything is fine," Pax turned to Will. I'm gonna need to you cool down."

"He just tried to - and you just - ugh," Will angrily pulled his hand away from Pax and started pacing furiously.  "What would have happened if we weren't there to stop him?" Will demanded.

"Woah," I interrupted.  "What is going on?" I turned to Pax, who looked like he'd give a... less angry recount of the situation.

Pax just smiled.  "Deceit - "

Pax was interrupted by Sparks, who's ear sudden perked up and she immediately started barking.  She scrambled towards the door.  She jumped up, barking excitedly.

The door opened slowly and Sparks spun in a fast circle, happy to see her owner.

"Hey girl," Virgil dropped his knees, petted her as he tried - and failed - to lick his face.  "You take care of them while I was gone?" He mumbled softly.

Sparks barked in response, before pressing her nose into Virgil's stomach, trying to figure out where her own has been for all this time.

Virgil finally looked up at the rest of us, a forced smile on his face - which fell when he noticed Pax and Will, who were both now staring curiously at him.

"Okay, so I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that I missed something," Virgil said slowly, looking between all of us.  "Mind filling me in?"

__________
So...

Boy, this is a topic I've been wanting to tackle for a WHILE.

I hope at this point it's starting to become clear that most of the relationships in this story are not healthy.  Patton was right - if Logicality were to happen now, or anytime before now, it would just be toxic for the both of them as he explained. 

Which brings up the even bigger ship in this series - Prinxiety.

Prinxiety is the most toxic ship in this series and I hope that you all have either started to see that or will looking back.  They, like all relationships, have their good moments but the rest is basically a runway filled with warning signs and red flags.

I mean just look at what has happened: Roman keeping his complex (that theory that if Roman's heart breaks, he dies) a secret from Virgil, Virgil being with Roman because Roman could literally die if he thought that Virgil stopped loving him, Roman giving credit to Virgil for "saving" him from his depression, Roman relapsing back into self-harm over them just taking a break, Virgil keeping important secrets himself, Roman (basically) giving Virgil permission to kill him, Virgil not taking the time to grieve, Virgil blaming himself for Roman's death and becoming fixated on finding a way to bring Roman back with little regard to the consequences -  and that's only the things you guys know about.

I'm sorry for such a long wait, but I hope that this chapter didn't disappoint :3

- Max <3