Chapter 35 - Continuation

*

Um wait, hold on. What??

What Taye had said to her ruminated a bit and she pulled away again, "Yes and I still feel guilty about that too" she said as she walked back over to the couch and sat down.

Taye followed her. "Guilty? What do you have to be guilty for? It was my fault both times and both times I was drunk, remember?"

Kim nodded, how could she forget.

"But we did nothing wrong the first time, both of us. You gotta let that go" he said and she only nodded. Her arms crossed across her chest, "I hate that you've carried that around with you for 5 years."

"Well, she was my best friend."

"And again it was my fault, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I put you in those compromising situations."

He looked at her but she barely looked at him. He wasn't getting through to her at all. 

"It wasn't fair. It was my fault. Damn, I have a tendency to ruin every relationship I've been in this year alone. You're not gonna block and delete me from your life too? Will you? I'd be sad."

He pouted and when she finally turned to look at him, she rolled her eyes playfully. "What face are you making right now?"

"It's my 'I'm sorry, please don't feel bad or at fault or leave me' face. It's a sad face."

"It definitely is," she said with a chuckle. "You can stop now, I can't take you seriously-"

"Only if you feel better, I'm sorry I ruined your mood, the mood. We were having a great time. We've always had a great time together."

Kim looked at him, "Well yeah because we were best friends."

"With horrible timing" Taye added.

"It's still horrible timing," she said shakily. Was it a mistake to start hanging out with him again? What about Adena? What if they made up and had a coming to Jesus? She would have to drop Taye immediately no matter what their relationship was. 

"I know Adena is a big part of this" Taye said, reading her mind. "But she left both of us for dead practically and all we got is each other. We gotta help each other to move on, cheer each other up, find the best restaurants..." he said with a smile and she smiled back. "You ok now?"

Kim nodded, "Yes I'm ok."

He had a point. Adena wanted nothing to do with them. She was grown and could be friends with whomever she wanted. He was divorcing Adena, not her. 

"I should go. It's late" Taye said as he got up and walked to the door. He put his coat back on. 

"Text me when you get home?"

"Of course," he said to her. They stood there for a moment awkwardly. He didn't want to leave the mood like this so he innocently leaned in and kissed her cheek. "Thank you, Kim, for everything."

The urge took over again. She pulled him close to her and kissed him. "That's what friends are for right?" she said as she pulled away. Ok, she got it out of her system now. This would be the last time. They both were full of tequila and chamomile and apparently it was a deadly combination. He smiled at her, he left and she closed the door behind him. She put her hand on her chest and leaned against the door, not believing what had just happened, like she was in a daytime soap opera.

She basically was living a real-life soap opera.

She turned off the lights and went to bed. She thought it would be easy to go to sleep since the tea always made her sleep well but the conversation with Taye was running through her brain. She always wondered how her life would be now if things were different. 

* First Day of Freshman Year

Kim waved to her mother as she drove off, she waved until she could no longer see her. When that happened, she let out a sigh of relief. She was finally on her own. She has been waiting for this day to come for so long. No more being the default babysitter for her baby twin sisters. Why her mom waited until she was 10 to have more kids, she'll never know. Especially the way she and her dad fought all the time. Adding babies sent them over the edge. Kim was happier about their divorce than they were. Though it hurt that her dad had to move out, the house was finally peaceful...well save for the twins crying and screaming. Her grades went back up, she wasn't stressed out any longer. She no longer had to see the guidance counselor once a week to get through it all. She graduated high school with honors. 

She was finally away from home. Away from the fake friends, enemies, and immature boys who thought they had a chance. She couldn't wait to socialize. She wanted a man, not boys. She was sure she would find that here. 

She went back into her dorm and later walked into her room. She was the first one to arrive. There were 2 empty beds in the room, she had 2 roommates now instead of just one. A late entry and they were stuck with her. She sighed as she sat on her newly made bed but then she smiled. Fuck it. If she didn't get along with them, they didn't have to be friends. She then noticed something on her desk and she walked over to pick it up. Mom left her some cash for groceries. She had nothing better to do so that's what she decided to do.

However, since Columbia University was located in the most famous, busy, and distracting city in the world, she got sidetracked. She got some actual New York pizza. She window-shopped. She walked until she couldn't walk anymore, enjoying the time she had to herself. She then passed another bar and the small chalkboard sidewalk sign said they had dollar drinks for happy hour. Happy hour was about to end in 30 minutes. She rushed in and ordered herself 3 drinks with her grocery money. It was only 3 bucks, she'll live and she still had her fake ID. She sat at the bar and people-watched. It was a pool hall bar, the tables were all full, there were darts being thrown, sports being shown on the tv, and a touchscreen jukebox that played whatever it wanted if someone didn't put any money into it. 

"Ah shit, are you kidding me," a guy said next to her. "Shit!"

"You don't even have a dollar my guy?" the bartender asked.

"I did, I swore I did but someone picked my fucking pockets."

Kim smiled, she felt generous and tossed a dollar at them. They looked at her with surprise. "There, problem solved."

"Um thank you," they said and ordered their drink. "I wish I could repay you but-"

"Don't worry about it, it's just a dollar."

"Ooooh someone's getting cocky, slow down there now."

"I'm gonna order a few more, it's only 5 minutes left. What you want?"

"I'm good," they said to her, waving her off. She ordered a couple more drinks for herself and then added a couple more of whatever they had. "Damn, you're like my fairy godmother or something?"

Kim smiled as she sipped on the drink she had been working on. "No one should miss out on something like this. This is unheard of, probably won't happen again."

"Oh no, they do this every week," they said and her eyes widened. "I've been here a few times."

"Oh never mind then. Still, it's unheard of. Especially in New York City." Soon the bar got way too crowded because everyone was trying to get a drink before the sale ended. 

"How about we move?" they said to her and she nodded. They borrowed a tray, put all their drinks on it, and moved it to a small open table nearby. "Ahhh so much better. Well hey, let's toast. To One Dollar Mondays." She smiled and toasted with him. They ended up sitting there and talking for a while. Since Kim was ahead of him, she was drunk before she could drink her last 2 drinks. "You sure?" they asked her. 

"Yeah finish it. Can't waste liquor, that's against the law" she slurred. The sun had set and the lights got dimmer as time went on. The music sounded better and now she made a new friend. Unfortunately, she drank so much that she needed help getting back home. Well to her dorm that is. They were nice enough to get an Uber, ride with her to the dorm, and even walked her up. 

"I had to make sure you made it all the way. You're wasted" he said as he leaned in the doorway. He was drunk too, but not as far gone as Kim was. 

"You're such a gentleman and a scholar," she said with a smile as she finally got her door open and walked into the room. It was still empty except for all of her things. "You're drunk too. You should stay awhile."

He looked at her. He saw no problem with that, well except for the fact that she was fucking plastered. If he was gonna go that far with someone, they couldn't be this drunk. There would be no point. Which sucked because she was fine as fuck. "Nah, you need to get some rest. Thanks for spending all that money on me but I gotta get back myself" he said and then burped. 

"You mean you don't want to stay with me? I got the place to myself. No one is home. It's the perfect time" she said as she stood right in front of him. She started unbuttoning her top. Uh oh. 

"I can't. I gotta get back..." he said but he was getting weaker by the second. She had beautiful eyes, a cute nose ring, sexy lips...and her titties were sitting nicely in that bra she had them in. She bit her lip and started unbuttoning his shirt. Shit. It was about to be over for him. "Girl...you're relentless," he said, trying to stay strong. Her long fingernail trailed up his arm and he literally shivered and got goosebumps. How did she know that he loved that? He couldn't be strong anymore. He pulled her in for a kiss, his skin still in shock and other parts of his body coming to life. She finished unbuttoning his shirt as they did. 

Then all of a sudden, she jumped away from him. She covered her mouth and then rushed into the bathroom. She made it to the toilet just in time. If she hadn't been drinking, he would have been really offended if she threw up. She slammed the door shut and all he could do was stand there. He realized quickly that it was time to go. He walked out and shut the door, disappearing down the hall...

The next day, Kim couldn't remember a thing and stayed in bed all day. She was upset that she had no groceries, they would definitely help right now. Once Missy and Adena moved in and they hit it off immediately, she didn't bother trying to remember her first night in the dorm. She got back safe that was all that mattered.

Then the infamous 90's party happened and the girls showed up dressed as TLC. They did the dance they practiced in front of everyone and were a big hit after that. Kim laughed as she jumped down from the little makeshift stage. "Ohmygod, we fucking killed that!" she said excitedly to Missy and soon they were surrounded by drunk and thirsty guys. Neither of them minded. However, someone was missing. She looked around for Adena and she was already making progress without them. A guy in a bright neon outfit had his arms around her and they were talking or trying to over the music. She continued to watch in case Adena needed to be saved. He could be a creep and she had a boyfriend. Soon they were holding hands and started dancing. A guy brought over some shots and she took them down. She danced with a couple of guys and looked around for Adena again. She was still in the arms of Neon Boy. As she got closer, she realized they were dressed as Fresh Prince. "Adena, you ok?"

"Who's Adena? Her name is Chilli" Fresh Prince said to her and then it hit her. It all came back to her at that moment. He was the cute guy at One Dollar Mondays. "And you must be T-Boz, you're killing that wig. Or is it a wig? Looks natural."

"Why thank you," she said as she patted the blonde wig on her head. She was waiting for him to realize that he knew her but he didn't. He was all over Adena and she didn't mind. Kim decided to forget about it. There were so so so many other hot fish in the sea of Columbia University that she didn't mind taking the L. She actually ended up dating 3 guys she met at that party. All assholes though.

Fresh Prince, who ended up being Taye of course, was in love with Adena the moment he saw her. He didn't remember Kim at all. She was just a drunk hookup. She moved on but that night they shared, or what she remembered of it, lived in her head rent-free. 

*

According to Chinese philosophy, the whole universe is controlled by two primal forces: Yin and Yang.

*

Taye was right, their first time meeting shouldn't have made her feel guilty because they both hadn't met Adena yet. If it stopped there, she would have nothing to feel guilty about. 

But it happened again...

Believe it or not, Adena's first disastrous surprise party was scandalous too. However, no party would top Adena's 24th. Kim, Missy, and Taye had no idea that Adena wasn't into surprise parties and they went all out but still tried to keep it a secret. Adena caught on though. Something was going on. Taye was hanging out with Kim and Missy more often - without her, which wasn't out of the ordinary because they all were best friends, but still, her intuition kept telling her something was up.

Right when Adena's guard dropped, was when it all happened. She thought she was just being paranoid. But she was right all along.

*Adena's 20th Birthday

"SURPRISE!!!!!!!" they all shouted, throwing their hands up in the air and party horns playing as the door opened. There she was. A very stunned Adena. They all cheered and clapped. Kim, Missy, and Taye looked at each other, she was definitely surprised, she had no clue! They did it! They pulled it off!

However, in a surprising change of events, Adena just looked around the room and then left, closing the door behind her. Everyone stood there confused while someone turned the music back on. "I should check on her," Taye said to them and walked out after her.

"What's up her ass?" Missy asked with a shake of her head.

A few minutes went by and everyone started eating, resumed their drinking, and continued with the party even though the guest of honor disappeared as soon as she walked in. Taye came back and Missy and Kim walked right up to him. "So apparently she has this thing about surprise parties."

"What do you mean?" Missy and Kim said.

"She hates them. She hates surprises. I didn't know that."

"Us neither," they both said.

"Also, it's freezing rain outside so her parents can no longer come into town to visit and she was looking forward to that. She's also in a bad mood because she says she knows she flunked her math exam she just took. She also said that she was more looking forward to your roommate sleepover you two claimed to be setting up. She's also tired."

"Ok so is she coming back?" Kim asked.

"No, she wanted to be alone. She's tired and wanted to rest and get warm. She asked me to stay at the party. She said she also smelled weed and fried chicken and didn't want that smell all on her stuff. She has the extra key to my room so I told her to go rest there, my roommate is still out of town."

"Well damn did we do anything right?" Missy asked, throwing her hands up in the air. 

"We remembered her birthday," Taye said with a shrug, "Now we know never to do this again."

Missy shook her head, "Damn no thank you or nothing. We did this all for nothing."

Kim nodded, disappointed, but she was more upset because she felt she ruined her best friend's birthday without meaning to. "Well, I guess the party's over."

"Oh no, this food ain't gonna eat itself. These drinks ain't gonna drink itself and this weed ain't gonna smoke itself. We ain't wasting this shit" Missy said as they all poured shots. 

So they continued the party in hopes that Adena would calm down and come back. She never did. Soon more people showed up, smelling the food, and hearing the music and some people called their friends. It was no longer a surprise party, it was a party party. 

And they partied hard. So hard that the RA had to shut the party down or the cops would be called. After that, everyone left. "Is it someone's birthday? What's up with the birthday balloons?" someone asked as they walked out. 

Soon Kim and Taye were standing in the middle of their trashed dorm room. Adena mentioned this too. She said she didn't want to clean up after a party she didn't want. "Where's Missy?" Taye asked, looking around.

"Ugh, she fucking left. Bitch. Now I gotta clean all this shit up by myself?" Kim asked disappointedly. She was too drunk and high for this shit. She was about to sober up really quickly. 

"I'll help you," Taye said as he turned the music back on but at a lower volume. They found trash bags and started throwing everything out.

"Look at all this alcohol. We can take the unopened ones back right?" Kim asked.

"Yeah, if they all weren't open," Taye said with a shake of his head, picking up a bottle of Ciroc that was practically full. Someone opened a whole new Ciroc for just a shot or two though there were other bottles already opened.

"Great, what are we gonna do with all this shit?" Kim asked as she put her hands on her hips. 

"I'll gladly take some off your hands, my liquor stash is empty."

"Good" Kim said, "Take all of it if you want," she said and then glanced across the room and gasped. He looked around wondering what had happened. "Shit, someone spilled something on Adena's bed" Kim whined as she walked over. "Shit," she said as she took the comforter off her bed, thankfully that was the only thing that was messed up. "Ima go to the laundry room. Don't leave."

"I won't" Taye promised. Taye continued to clean but took his time as he took a couple more shots and smoked the last of the blunt he had. When Kim came back, Taye was lit.

"I was gone that long?" Kim asked with a laugh. 

"Can't let this shit go to waste" Taye said as he passed her a blunt and poured her a shot. They toasted, to what, they didn't know, and then resumed cleaning up. However, when a good song came on, Kim would drop everything and have to dance to it, which was making the task longer. Taye's drunk ass didn't mind. It was entertaining. "I can't remember the last time I've seen you this drunk."

"How about the other night while we were planning this disaster of a party."

"Nah, you had your shit together. You can handle your alcohol. Missy can too but it's like she's trying to kill herself and Adena, well she's a lightweight."

Kim laughed and nodded as she sat down on her bed, taking a break from dancing. She sipped on the concoction she made so another bottle was finished at least. "Hmm. Ok, Christmas?"

"Almost," Taye said with a laugh. "You weren't really sloppy though."

"Yeah you're right," she said and then took a long sip, "I think the last time you saw me sloppy drunk was at One Dollar Monday, remember?"

Taye paused and looked at her. "Wait, you remember that?"

"Wait do you? I mean I can remember some of it and then I blacked out after that. Why didn't you tell me that you remembered?"

"Well, I totally didn't recognize you at the 90's party with that blonde T-Boz wig you had on. The first time I saw you looking normal, I remembered right away. You were more gone than I was. You never spoke of it or said anything so I figured you didn't remember."

Kim laughed. "No I recognized you right away at the 90's party but you didn't recognize me. Besides you were all up Adena's ass so I didn't say anything."

"This is a small world and even a smaller campus," Taye said with a shake of his head. They met at a bar off campus and still somehow bumped into each other again. Now he was dating her best friend. "What's the last thing you remember?"

Kim paused as she took another huge gulp of her drink. "I remember you getting me back to the dorm safely, which was very nice of you."

"It's the least I could do for you Miss Big Spender, you bought all my drinks. What did you call me? Oh, 'a gentleman and a scholar.' Never heard that before."

"Ohmygod," she said with a shake of her head. "What's the last thing you remember?"

"I remember basically everything. I dropped you off, you started throwing up and I let myself out. Got back to my dorm and collapsed" he said with a shrug. She nodded. Soon a big elephant entered the room, they both remembered what else happened but saying it out loud would've made it real. 

"Oh let me throw her laundry in the dryer, be right back," she said and practically ran out of the room. He got back to cleaning up and by the time she got back, it was all done. "Ohmygod. We finished it-"

"I finished it. I'm a gentleman and a scholar remember?"

"Fine, you can have that. I'm just glad we're done. I'm gonna kill Missy when she comes back. Adena too."

"Not on her birthday, she's been through enough already," Taye said as he sat next to her on her bed. Kim shrugged and laid back on the bed, her legs and feet still touching the ground. Taye did as well and that wasn't a good idea for quite a few reasons, one being that now they both couldn't get up. They lay there looking at the ceiling, listening to the music, then a slow jam came on and she smiled. 

"I love this song," she said as she sang along. Taye looked over at her and watched her, amused. The night they met was still hanging in the air and he could remember thinking how beautiful she was, her hazel eyes were beautiful, the nose ring and braids really suited her, and when she took off her top...

He rolled over so he could face her, "So you don't remember anything else from that night?" he asked her. She looked over at him and nodded and looked up at the ceiling. She remembered. "Wow, do you ever wonder what would have happened if things turned out differently? If we acted on those feelings when we saw each other again?"

"All the time," she said without hesitation as she rolled over to face him. "But it's fine, I was just a drunk hookup-"

"You were not just a drunk hookup...I really wanted to stay but you were so out of it. I didn't want to take advantage of you. But Kim, seriously, if you weren't as drunk as you were...as soon as you took your top off it would have been on" he said looking her in the eyes. She digested what he said and looked away. "Unless you wouldn't..."

"I definitely would if I knew you were into it. But I guess it just wasn't meant to be" she said as she looked away again. He looked at her. Was that disappointment?

"Hey, you ok? You not thinking about that same asshole right?" he asked her and she chuckled. How did he know? "I know you are because you always make that face when you think about these assholes you try to date."

"I sure know how to pick them huh?" she said, and by accident, she reached across and brushed a piece of lint off his arm. She noticed his skin started forming goosebumps immediately. She looked up at him with surprise. Was it that easy? She looked him in the eyes and then ran her nail up and down his arm. Before she could even finish, his lips were on hers. She froze and didn't know what to do at first, she then gave in and returned the kiss. They then heard a group of people coming down the hallway outside and they both jumped away from each other and sat up. 

"Um, I should take this alcohol and chicken off your hands. I should get back to...Adena" he said. Kim nodded. Shit. Where did that come from? Why did it feel just as electrifying as it did that one night? She walked him to the door after he gathered up all his party favors. "Hey, I should apologize for what just-"

"It's ok, we're both drunk and high as hell again."

"I definitely will remember this time too," he said looking her up and down. The question, what if, danced in his head. "This stays between us?"

"Of course, you love Adena. I love Adena. I would never want to get in your way" she said. Talking about it would start unnecessary drama and they both would lose a best friend. They both couldn't bare to break anyone's heart. "You two are soulmates anyway. I think if things happened differently you would still find your way back to her."

"You forgive me?" he asked her. 

"I forgive you. Don't worry, you don't have to worry about me. This stays between us" she said and he nodded. She opened the door for him.

"Oh Kim?" he asked as he turned back around to face her. She looked at him. "Stop thinking about that asshole ok? You deserve someone better. If I could, if things were different..." he said and stopped. He already said too damn much. 

However, Kim understood loud and clear. If things were different, she would be with Taye and not these assholes. But it wasn't in the stars for them. 

"Take some Advil," he said as he started walking down the hall backward, still looking at her. "Bye Kim."

She waved at him and then stepped back and closed the door. She leaned against it, not believing what just happened. This had to stay between them. 

What happened at the surprise party, stays at the surprise party.

*

Yin and Yang are opposing yet complementary principles. Neither is more important than the other and only together do they make a whole. You can't have darkness without light and vice versa.

*

https://youtu.be/HNjag6cobkM