I had to drag myself out of bed the following morning. A bride-to-be should be happy, right? I was anything but happy. I lifelessly drew a bath and took off my clothes. I washed up, not even paying attention to what I was doing. I got out and got dressed, all without Danielle's help, and I forgot whether or not I'd conditioned my hair. I didn't really care. My future had  just been snatched away from me by one very influential Richard Banning III.

And Louis – where did he fit in to all of this? I was so ready to dump Richard, but what exactly was in my heart for Louis? He made me laugh, he challenged me to think about what I wanted, and I knew he genuinely cared for me. And I desperately wanted to kiss him. Was I...in love with Louis? The idea seemed impossible. I mean, Louis was a great guy, but I couldn't expect anything to happen between myself and a...servant.

I grabbed my phone and called Veronica. When she answered, I didn't even say hello, I just blurted out, "I need you! Richard proposed!"

Her response was just as quick. "I'll be right there!"

She arrived within half an hour. She could see that my eyes were red and puffy, and there were bags under my eyes from the lack of sleep. I tossed and turned all night, unable to find rest.

"This is bad, huh?" She said with sincere sympathy in her voice.

"Yup. Not only did Richard propose, completely out of the blue, but I had finally decided that I was going to break up with him. I don't love Richard. At all! What am I going to do?"

"Well, your best option is probably to marry the jerk, enjoy the sex because damn! He is hot!  Make him buy you all sorts of expensive crap, and live out your days screwing the pool boy. Just tell him that you and Louis are a package deal."

"Veronica!" I yelled. "This is serious!"

"I know, I know. I'm sorry. This really does suck. But here's the bright side – it's the 21st freakin' century! You don't have to submit to an arranged marriage. You're smart and powerful and you can do whatever the hell you want with your life."

"Yeah," I replied miserably. "And my parents will cut me off and send me to live in the subway tunnels."

"Whoa, that's depressing, girlfriend. It won't be that bad. They'll come around, trust me."

"What if they don't?" I whined.

"They will have to accept your decisions if you just make them, even without their consent. You just need to exercise your independence and stand up for yourself!"

"You sound like Louis."

"How is Pool Boy, by the way?"

I hesitated. Did I want to tell her everything or continue to deny that there was anything between us? I finally decided that I had to tell someone or I would explode. I threw myself backwards on my bed and cried, "I have it so bad for him!"

"Really?" She squealed. "Tell me, tell me!"

I closed my eyes, feeling like I might cry from my conflicting emotions. No one had ever made me feel the way Louis did. The dam broke and everything came gushing out. "He's really sweet and he's very funny and he always makes me laugh. I followed him to this club down in the subway tunnel, and this other guy, Harry, tried to feel me up, but Louis threw him off me and then he took me home. And we raced on the treadmills and then he taught me how to drive a stick-shift car, but it wasn't around here because the car was a junker and I didn't want anyone to see me in it, so we went to a mall parking lot. And-"

"Slow down there, girl!" Veronica said, laughing wildly. "All of that happened in one week! Since the pool party? How in the the hell...?"

"We just started hanging out, I guess." I couldn't really explain it, but Louis and I had spent a lot of time together in the past week. I just felt comfortable around him, like I could be myself. My real self.

"And tell me again about following him into the subway, you stalker!"

I told her every detail about following him to the dance club, including Harry stealing my bracelet and Louis holding me close and sitting by my bed until I fell asleep."

Veronica had a look of pity on her face when I finished. "Oh, babe. This ain't no small time crush. The two of you are smitten!"

"I know!" I said, rolling over and screaming into my pillow.

"This isn't a bad thing, Ashten. This is awesome. It's so romantic."

"What's romantic about being in love with someone from a totally different world?!"

"So you are in love!" She exclaimed. "It's like Romeo and Juliet."

"Everyone seems to forget that Romeo and Juliet committed suicide because they couldn't be together. That's not exactly a happy ending. But oh, my gosh, I really want Louis to kiss me!" I said, bursting into an embarrassed laugh, and Veronica joined in.

Finally, Veronica just said, "Ashten, you just have to gather up your courage and tell your parents and Richard the truth. And then, you might want to tell Louis." She winked as she said it.

"Do you think people will gossip about me?" I worried.

"Um, yeah," she said. "Our friends gossip about everyone! But would you rather marry Richard and have them gossiping about whatever they can think up while you're completely miserable? Or you could marry Louis, who would make you so happy that you'll be oblivious to any gossip about you."

"Well, I'm not planning to marry Louis, you weirdo! I only found enough courage today to admit to anyone but myself that I have some pretty intense feelings for him."

"I think everything will work out, my friend. Love will triumph over all!" She shouted, pretending to brandish an invisible sword over her head.

"You're so weird," I laughed.

We spent most of the day talking about Louis and about her date with Liam Payne over the weekend. He took her to a crab shack up in Maine, and then they spent the night dancing under the stars, just outside of a country club. He'd told her it was the best way to stay under cover, otherwise fans would be hounding them relentlessly.

"Do you think you'll see him again?" I asked.

Her eyes twinkled as she answered. "We already have another date set in two weeks. We just meld together in such a comfortable way."

I was happy for her. And I was feeling a little happier for myself, too. It was good to admit what I really wanted and what I didn't want, just like Louis had challenged me to do.

It was late afternoon by the time Veronica left. I went to find Louis and I was informed that he was probably in his apartment. I headed towards the servants' quarters, but my mother intercepted me.

"There you are, Dearest! Let's talk about wedding planners, shall we?" She dragged me into her office and brought up her calendar on her laptop. "I hope you don't mind, but I've already made a few appointments with the top wedding planners. I managed to sneak one in with Mindy Weiss in two weeks; she's my top choice since she's worked with so many celebrities – Katy Perry, Jennifer Garner, Pink, Jessica Simpson. We'll have to fly to LA for that, but that shouldn't be a problem. I can't imagine that she will have any openings for this year or next-"

"Mother," I interrupted her. "I'm not ready to think about this yet. I'm still in a little bit of a shock, you know."

"Understood, Dearest, but we can put a few appointments on the calendar, can't we?" She said in a sickeningly sweet voice.

"Mom, I'm not ready to think about it yet!" I snapped.

"Watch your tone, young lady!" She warned me. Then she softened a little. "Very well, I suppose we can wait until after the 4th of July weekend. But then we're getting right to work, understand?"

"Yes, Ma'am," I said and hurried out of her office.

I continued with my original mission to find Louis. I quietly went to the servants' quarters, not wanting anyone else to know that I was down there. I knocked on Louis' door and waited. I knocked again heard rustling. He opened up, rubbing his eyes, looking surprised that I was there that his door.

"Are you okay?" I asked, thinking it was unusual for this high-energy person to be sleeping late in the afternoon.

"Yeah, I just have a little summer cold, so I asked if I could quit a little early today."

"I'm sorry, I can come back tomorrow since this doesn't seem like a good time to talk."

"Any time is a good time to talk to you," he smiled, which made his eyes sparkle a little. He motioned for me to come in. His apartment was nice and tidy, the kitchenette was spotless and upon glancing into his room, I noticed his bed was made. I sat down in one of the small armchairs and he sat across from me.

"I'm still confused," I blurted out.

"You haven't had much time to think about it." Then he started coughing, turning his head politely away from me.

"Can I make you some tea or something?" I offered.

He looked at me and furrowed his eyebrows. "Wait, who are you? You look a lot like Ashten Norwood, but she wouldn't be caught dead preparing tea for a servant!"

"Shut up!" I laughed. "Do you want some or not?"

"That would be nice, thank you."

I had no idea how to cook, but every once in a while, I'd hang out with Lucinda in the kitchen. She showed me how to make tea, and I couldn't believe it was so easy! I put the tea kettle on the stove to boil and I looked inside a small box on his countertop conveniently labeled tea. "Lemon ginger okay?"

"Perfect."

It was strange. I hadn't even wrestled with the idea of doing something nice for Louis. My mom had drilled it into my brain for so many years that I could ask practically anything of our servants and they would do it for me, because they were there to serve me. I loved that, and I used it to my full advantage. But now, I really wanted to do something nice for Louis, because he'd been so nice to me, rescuing me, getting my bracelet back, teaching me to drive. It made my heart feel warm to do a good deed.

Little trails of steam rose from the teapot's spout. I watched them, thinking about my other friends. Veronica was so down to earth and supportive. She could play the rich snob game as well as we all could, but there had always been something a little deeper about her. She absolutely loved clothing and fashion, and she had the largest closet out of all of us, but the things that made her tick weren't as tangible. I thought about the other girls, what they would say if they saw me catering to Louis right now. I'm sure there would be plenty of upturned noses and whispered remarks. I knew all too well because that's exactly how I was. Or at least how I had been.

The whistle of the teapot startled me and I heard Louis chuckling behind me. I grabbed a mug from the cabinet and poured in the boiling water. Then I plopped a tea bag into it.

"Cream or sugar?" I asked.

"Neither, thank you."

I placed the mug on a plate and gave it to Louis with a spoon so he could fish out his tea bag when it was done steeping.

"So you're still confused, you say," Louis commented. "It seems pretty clear to me – if you don't love Richard, don't marry him. Problem solved. I mean, yeah, there's the awkward break up and he might cry and grovel, but once you get past that, you're off, scot-free!"

"Tomlinson," I laughed. "How do always manage to make me feel better, even when I'm on the verge of a massive catastrophe?" The gravity of the situation quickly came back. "You just...you can't possibly understand. There's so much pressure from everyone to do everything just right and to fit into a perfect mold. I've known parents who have literally escorted their children out the door if they went against their wishes."

"So, what you're saying is that if your parents kicked you out, that would be the worst possible thing that could happen."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Would it be worse than marrying Richard, being tied to someone you don't love for the rest of your life because it's what your parents wanted?"

I sighed. "No. That sounds awful, too. But at least I'd have a roof over my head and someone to provide for me. And we have a lot of the same friends, so that would be nice."

"No, Ashten, do you hear yourself? You said your parents don't want you to settle for anything less than the best. But if you marry Richard, you will be settling. It won't be just like having a room-mate for the rest of your life. You'll always have to pretend you're in love but on the inside you'll become bitter about the fact that you never found true love...and everyone should have a chance to find true love at least once!"

I shrugged. "Maybe this really is love and this is as good as it gets."

"It's not love, Ash! I know – I've been in love once and it was nothing like you described. It wasn't just nice or convenient. It was warm and hot at the same time, all-encompassing but not suffocating, it was wonderful and terrifying all at once. We were only in high school, but I just knew that Katie was the one. I just knew."

"What happened? If you tell me you two are still together, I'm going to be really angry that you've been flirting with me!"

I giggled a little bit, but Louis' face fell. His eyes were overwhelmed with pain and he pressed his lips together firmly.

"I'm sorry," I said in almost a whisper. "Bad joke, I guess. So what really happened between the two of you?"

"I wanted to marry her. I was going to propose after high school, before we went away to college..." his voice trailed off.

"And?" I urged him gently.

"She was killed in a car wreck, the summer after our junior year." He gulped and his jaw was clamped shut as he tried desperately to hold in his emotions.

"Louis," I hushed. "I'm sorry. Really, I'm so sorry. That must have been horrible."

"Yeah," he said, taking in a huge breath and blowing it out. "It's been five years. It doesn't hurt as bad as it used to. I can go for days at a time without thinking about her now; when it first happened, I thought about her every second, and how it felt like my heart was violently ripped out of my chest when I found out she was dead."

His pain was so real, and just for a moment, it was so raw. He was allowing me to see the real pain, not just the scars it had left behind. Without even thinking, I put my hand on his cheek. He placed his hand over mine and held it there for several moments. He finally grasped my hand gently and pulled it down to his lap, still holding it firmly.

"Maybe this is kind of morbid, but if you lost Richard tomorrow, what would it do to you?"

"I'd be sad, of course. I mean, he is my friend, and we've been together a long time..."

"Would it tear you apart? Would you feel like half of you was completely gone? Because when you truly love someone, they become part of you in every way."

I hung my head, almost feeling ashamed. "I don't love Richard that way. He's more like a brother, I guess. I'd hate to lose him, but it wouldn't destroy me. Maybe I'm just not capable of that kind of love."

"You are capable of that kind of love," he assured me. "You just haven't been given the chance to find it."

I pulled my hand away from his abruptly and changed the subject, "So, when's our next driving lesson?"

"I'm not sure if I can fit one in before the holiday weekend. I have to work a little extra because I took this afternoon off, and because I'm taking a few days off for the 4th of July weekend. I'm going home for a friend's wedding."

"Oh, okay," I said, rather disappointed. "Well, just let me know when you get back because I'm determined to master the stick-shift." I gave him a hopeful a little smile.

He nodded.

"Are you going to be okay? I'm sorry if I upset you."

"I'm fine, really. Don't worry about me." He stood up to walk me to the door. "It's good to talk about her once in a while."

"Okay," I said, reaching for the handle, but Louis stopped me.

"Ash, I have an idea!" He said, sounding excited.

"Yeah?"

He sneezed but then he continued and his words had me both stunned and thrilled at the same time. He spoke almost breathlessly.

"When I go home for the 4th...come with me!"

* * * * *

What do you think Ashten is going to do? :D