"Good guys finish last, right?

That's right, Tony. This is you tape.

Before I begin, I want you to know that I don't blame you for what you did. I blame you for what you didn't do.

The day we met, you had accidentally walked into me and caused me to dump my books. It was funny; a reoccurring joke that we'd bring up anytime we passed in the hall.

It was nice, having someone there I could be normal with. Someone I could show the real side of me, the real Hannah Baker. Sometimes I was even sure that you liked me more than that old car, that maybe there was a chance I could make it through the rest of high school if I knew you'd be there.

But there were two nights I needed you, Tony, and you weren't there.

If you've made it thus far in the tapes, you know about the stop sign. You know about everything leading up to that nameless girl and her entire life being ripped from her that night at the party.

And there; that was the first night I needed you, Tony.

I cried in that closet for hours until I was able to go back downstairs, to face Justin and HIM without completely falling apart. What happened with Clay, the rape, the stop sign, when exactly was it that I realized I needed you?

Clay. When I watched him leave with that look on his face, it broke my heart. I nearly called you then, but I knew you'd be busy. You were always busy at night.

You were my superhero, Tony. You always seemed to be there when I needed you the most. You almost always had this six sense that allowed you to show up right at that second.

Your signal must have been hazy that night.

Justin. Would you have done something, Tony? If you had been the one standing outside that door instead of Justin? Would you have saved her?

Sheri. Would you have stood there and guided traffic until the cops came and saved Jeff?

I came over to your place the next day, remember? The day after Jeff died. I stood beside you as you worked on that stupid Mustang. And I liked it.

I liked the normalcy of it. That you could accept me for me, Hannah for Hannah. That you didn't believe any of the rumors.

Bryce Walker. Does the name ring a bell anyone? Did I mention him in a previous tape? Did I hint at mentioning him?

When I went back home that evening, Tony, I didn't stay for long. I still felt Mom and Dad were mad, that they blamed me for losing the money. I left. I went to Bryce's party.

You were there, Zach, do you remember me in the hot tub with you? Do you remember beckoning me in with you guys? Do you remember leaving me with him?

I bet you're wondering where you fit into this second time, Tony. How you had anything to do with it.

But you do know, don't you? You know exactly where you fit into this tape.

I came over at midnight; you asked me if I was okay. It happened in slow motion in my mind, did it for you?

I told you everything. About my idea with the tapes, what Bryce had done. You told me something that stuck in my head for hours that night.

"We can take him down." But could we, Tony? Could we really?

So I went back home and locked my door, connecting all the dots all the way back to Justin and that first night at the playground. And it was funny, because then, you didn't belong on the list. You were my friend, my only true friend.

Doomsday, I suppose you'll all call it now, the day I died for those of you that aren't the sharpest tool in the shed.

Now you're starting to get it, aren't you, Tony? You understand where I'm headed?

I called you at 3:15, when I was sure school was out. You answered on the second ring.

Was it because you saw my name? I'd like to think so.

You were sweet, asking how my day had gone, why I hadn't gone to school. And I told you my thoughts then, what I was going to do.

I wanted you to talk me out of it, to tell me you cared, that you loved me and it would get better. But a part of me knows, Tony, that even if you had tried, I would still do it.

You told me it was just a passing thought, that I shouldn't dwell on it. That nobody, none of you guys on these tapes, deserved the satisfaction of seeing me hurt, dead. That it was all in my head.

And maybe it was; I've been told I let thinks snowball.

Maybe Justin never sent that text, and Jess never slapped me, Alex never wrote that list, Tyler never took that picture, Courtney never kissed me, Marcus never tried to see if the rumors were true, Zach never stole my compliments, Ryan never put my poem in the newspaper, Sheri never hit the stop sign, Jeff never died, Bryce never. . . he never hurt took that girl's life away. Maybe it was all in my head. That's what you all want to think, right?

That the poor dead girl had issues.

Tony, I know you were on your way despite your protests against me asking. You told me that you'd see me tomorrow, but I could hear the engine roaring to life.

Tony, though this is before Bryce Walker's tape, before Mr. Porter's, this was the last tape I recorded. You were the last name I added to the list. I needed you to know that I knew all of this.

I thank you Tony. For being my friend when nobody else dared to be. For sticking by my side and ignoring the rumors. And maybe if I had gone straight to you instead of recording this, these tapes wouldn't have ever been released.

Thank you for being there, Tony. You were my superhero and I hope you'll understand why I left these in your care.

Heroes become memories, Tony. But legends never die." 

***AN***

This will be important later on in this. So keep an eye out. 

Hope you enjoyed! 

Let me know what you thought!

~ChasingMadness24