A/n: This was a request! It put me in the best mood so I'm writing it, though I was debating discontinuing this book... sigh. This a smut, so beware haha!! Also, I know a lot of people see Derek as a very kinky bed partner, but I see him as very reserved and sexy, not all that kinky at all. I don't know. I hope it's okay for you guys and that you're not disappointed :/ Well, enjoy :) Here's to HowCountryFeels for requesting!!

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Being a senior in high school was... hard. Being in highschool was hard, but when you had your parents breathing down your neck about doing well in school, a boyfriend who didn't really know how to help you, and the looking doom of the supernatural world over your head... It made things so much harder.

Especially when you're boyfriend is Derek Hale.

Constantly being around someone so intense and serious all the time, I really couldn't stand to be around him. I needed someone light hearted right now while I was stressed. I loved him, of course, but he was sapping my energy, and I didn't like the tension.

To give myself a chnace to focus on homework and studying, I started staying after school for long hours, spending as much time until I had to go home to do homework and studying. When Derek dropped off the map for a while I was so worried I couldn't even focus on my work. Luckily, Stiles jumped in for me. He was emotional support and a wonderful study buddy. He was only a junior but he could help - with google, if not with his own knowledge. In turn, I helped him with his classes he struggled in, and that way, we both got something out of it, school wise. He was really funny, too, and was good at cheering me up when I needed. He became like my best friend, despite being younger than me.

When Derek came back, I was mad. Really mad. I wouldn't talk to him. I felt abandoned, left on the side and in the dark like some piece of trash, discarded and forced to be forgotten. Derek couldn't get his mind around why I was so upset with him, making it all worse. With me hanging out with Stiles so much as well, especially one on one, Derek was convinced that I'd simply moved on, no matter how much Stiles, I, as well as the whole pack protested and argued that Stiles and were JUST FRIENDS, in every sense of the word.

So we broke up? I guess? It was all very unofficial.

The thing was, Derek and I still loved each other. We still wanted each other. Wake up in the middle of the night, expecting to see Derek panting next to me from a nightmare - and see no one. He'd wake up from nightmares with no one to comfort him - I know he did, because Peter told me. Even then, I still know he gets really bad nightmares. I wouldn't be able to go to sleep for hours after I lay down, staring at the ceiling helplessly. I had abandonment issues, and sleeping alone was impossible for me, especially in an empty house. I had trouble eating as well as sleeping, and became an all around mess. I crashed at the Stilinksi's on their couch all the time out of fear of being alone, and despite my efforts, my grades started dropping again. Easily said, from what the pack was saying they could see, as well as Peter was telling me he had noticed (stories to prove his point as well as just guesses about what he was feeling) Derek didn't seem to be taking the whole thing that well either.

Not to mention the overwhelming tension.

All the time.

Whenever Derek and I saw each other, we booked it the other way, dodging and doing anything in our power to stay away.

But... we couldn't always just leave.

In battle, Derek's instincts were still to protect me. One time, he jumped in just as I was losing my footing, a knife about to end my cycle of misery that I called life, and we ended o tangled together, the attacker dead and me in Derek's arms, pulled into his chest safety. The awkwardness of him letting me go, not meeting my eyes, either of us unable to say a word, then walking away was... unbearable. Pretending my heart didn't shoot into my throats and I yearned for him to hold me again was impossible.

Another time Derek made a snarky comment about how the food sucked, thinking he was teasing Stiles or his dad. I sarcastically made a remark back, explains that I'd made the food and that he should be appreciative that I'd put in so much effort instead of complaining like a small child. It had been one of our first conversations since the break ups, if not the first REAL interaction, and it reminded me of how he'd tease me in the morning about him cooking, then scarf it down like he was an actual wolf. I had turned away, clearing my throat, and had to leave the house entirely. When I came back, the awkward tension still hadn't let up. And Derek was gone by then.

Stares were exchanged and glances were caught and every time it was agonizing to look away. Instinctively something would happen and I'd turn to him to make a snarky, sarcastic, or sassy remark. Peter would say something stupid and, without thinking, Derek and I would exchange a look. We were being attacked and silently e fought side by side, or back to back, making sure the other was safe.

Thing after thing after thing and we could never seem to get away from each other. He was too prideful and socially inept to apologize and I wasn't going to apologize for something I didn't do. He fucked up. It was his job to fix things.

It all boiled over one night.

Derek was badly injured and everyone else was busy with other injuries, looking up stuff, or dealing with boyfriends, girlfriends, or just friends. So I took him home, lay him down, and tended to his wounds. With the help of Scott, since Derek was unconscious. Derek and I were out of fighting for a week as he stay unmaking, completely out of it. It worried me, and for the first time, I was truly scared that I had lost him. On bad terms, as well. Now I could never reverse the way things had ended. Now I could never make things better.

One morning, so bogged down and stressed out, I had to leave the room. I was crying, my palms flat on the table and my mind reeling. I felt sick to my stomach, my eyes shut tight in a desperate attempt to shut out the fact that the room was spinning and my heart ached as much as my stomach twisted. Half with nausea from the spinning room and half with despair, panic, and the purest pain from the thought of totally and completely, forever, losing the man I so truly loved with my entire soul.

Arms wrapped around my waist and I jumped, my choked sobs completely spilling out of my in unadulterated, unmasked sobs. I turned, saw Derek looking at me like a part of me had broken into an unrepairable, shard of a mess, and I buried myself in his chest, clinging to his shirt. My hands fisted, holding him close to me, the material of said shirt gripped like my life depended on it. He held me close, his body firm and his face in my hair, my body small and broken compared to his firm, bulky build.

When I finally calmed down, he pulled back, and I gasped. I wasn't ready to lose him again. He chuckled, pausing his movements, and I realized he hadn't been pulling away, but giving us enough distance to put his hand under my chin, forcing me to look at him. His hand adjusted, curling behind my jaw to my neck, wrapping behind my ear. He pulled me to him, silently pressing our lips together.

No words could describe the passion of that interaction. It was a flurry of relief, burning passion, tension, want and yearning that had long since overflowed and had been dammed up past capacity. All these bottled up emotions exploded in a storm of color and feeling, and my mind swam in it, unable to function properly. I ran on pure want and emotion, caving into my most basic needs without logical thinking.

My most basic need was him.

Derek was just as fiery. Once I didn't pull away, instead kissing him back and wrapping my hands in his arms, he pulled me closer together. My body flush to his, his hand that was not on my neck moved to my waist, holding me close. He stepped forward, pressing me into a wall. Hard.

Kisses that started out passionate, yearning, and surprisingly innocent, quickly took a sharp, one-eighty turn into something a lot more steamy. They got faster, hotter. Before either of us could process, I had my legs wrapped firmly around his waist, his hands pinning me to the wall by my waist, my shirt off. I wrapped my arms around his neck can he took that as a signal to walk backwards, taking my full weight. Soon enough we were in the room.

Gently, oh so gently, he placed me on the bed. He had to break the kiss then, and we finally stopped, out eyes locked and our faces blank. Then I smiled. Derek took that as a sign to go and crawled over me. A giggle erupted from me and he smirked. Only he and that special effect on me. And he knew it. He was proud of it.

My hands slipped to his belt loops, then slowly shifted upwards, going under his shirt and up, pulling it off of him all together. We didn't need to speak to know that both of us wanted his more than anything. I pulled him down to me again, my arms gripping the back of his neck, smashing our lips together, and the heated actions continued once again.

My hands lowered from his neck to his waist, not even remotely fumbling with his belt as I skillfully, without looking, loosened it and pulled it off. I could feel his smirk grow. It had been a while, but I had in no way gotten less good at taking off his clothes than I had before. Once he kicked off his pants, he disconnected our lips. My eyelids opened lazily as I watched him watch me as he shifted his body to kiss my neck. My head tilted back automatically, pushing into the pillow. He moved down slowly, from my neck to my upper chest, then skipping to my waist to kiss us above the waistband of my underwear.

I moaned.

(This is where things start becoming very sexual. If you're sedative to this kind of stuff, assume they had great sex and move to the bottom where a bolder sentence will tell you where it ends. Hope you enjoy! :))

He gripped my waist, then moved his hands up, under my shirt. His progress was slow, kissing from the starting place to a little higher every inch of my skin he revealed as he went up my body, slowly taking off my shirt. My waist. My stomach. The skin right under my bra. Between my breasts. Every other time, he wicked hard, then blew on the wet skin, making me shiver. He wasn't satisfied enough with my quiet, small reactions, and so he took his right hand, rubbing me through the material of my underwear.

The moan that escaped my lips now was wet and loud. I was so ready for him...

Once my shirt was completely off, he stared at my almost completely exposed body, smiling. He looked at me tenderly, and I could just feel the tenderness behind the lust. He had missed the sex... but he'd genuinely missed me just being in his bed. A glint of mischief shone in his eyes and I was excited, knowing he was going to take the opportunity to make up for lost time.

His fingers hooked under my back, pushing me up enough to press my chest into his, his fingers snagging my bra strap and in hooking it. He pulled the soft material blocking him from exposure of my chest away. His eyes scanned me again, and it made my sexual needs intensify, seeing that look on his face. I bucked my hips, grinding into his crotch. He gripped the bed sheets, his eyes closing.

Wow. I liked that.

Again, I bucked y hips into his, pressing more firmly and grinding hard on him. He but his lip. I smiled. He opened his eyes, raising an eyebrow. I winked. His fingers, just having tossed my bra away, now moved to pull down my panties. This he made quick work of, unlike the painfully slow process he'd used to take away my shirt, pants, and even my bra. He was needy. I could tell. I curled my fingers around and under the waist band of his boxers, pulling them down past his bulge, letting him spring free. I bit my lip, looking at him as a whole, and he kicked his boxers off. He blushed.

Derek Hale is not a blushing kind of guy. But when a beautiful woman looks at him like that, completely exposed and ready, it makes him hot. Who wouldn't be?

Passed the faze of teasing being fun anymore, he lined himself up with my entrance, leaning his head to attach his lips to my neck as his pushed in. My legs went limp on the bed, spread wide for him, but my hands clenched the sheets, my back curling in pure ecstasy as my chest pressed to his. A moan so loud it shook my lungs erupted from me and his sucked hard on my neck, almost overstimulating me. It had been a while since I'd had sex like I did with Derek and I'd nearly forgotten just how GOOD it was.

He moved slowly into me, the feeling of his length filling me up to my core making me whimper and moan it felt so good alone. He didn't move until I was adjusted, but once he was completely in and I was ready, he then proceeded to move out. I sighed yearningly as he left me empty, but sensing my want for him to return, he pushed back inside me.

This process repeated, his thrusts becoming harder and faster as I adjusted further and further. Soon I was a mess of moans, whimpers, cries, curses, and calling Derek's name. He pumped into me hard and strong, hitting somewhere new every time. His voice tickled my earlobes, his words sometimes dirty, sometimes loving, mixed with curses matching mine and my own name as I called his. His words were sometimes that, but always managed to simultaneously turn me on more and make me feel like the most loved, luckiest girl in the whole world. The ONLY girl in the whole world.

He continued to pump in and out of me until that oh so familiar knot formed in the pit of my stomach. His free hand that didn't support himself on the bed rose tenderly to grope and caress my chest, sending me into complete sex heaven. With the sucking on my neck, the pressure of his hand kneading my boob, and his length going in and out of me, I hit my climax and screamed. Loudly. He got sloppy towards the end, and once I hit mine, he followed. My warmness covered his length and he growled. The sound made me shiver and thrust my hips upward for once last, strong go, and he exploded inside of me.

(Here the sex has ended. Have a good day)

The room grew quiet. His hand moved from my body, his lips away from my neck, but he did not move past that for a few seconds. He left soft kisses on my collar Blane's and the space between them, pulling out slowly. Then he looked at me, serving em eyes. When I smiled again, now tired, he seemed satisfied, laying next to me. We looked at each other, both breathing heavily.

Without speaking, we both knew that we were forgiven and the problem was over. He knew I had problems with him leaving unannounced and I understood he wouldn't be doing it again. That's all that was needed. He pulled me close and kissed me gently.

"I love you."

"I love you too."