♥︎ ✯ ☘︎︎

𝟏𝟓 ... 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠

☘︎︎ ✯ ♥︎

callie 💋

"So tell me about Matt."

I pause mid-sip and slowly lower my latte to my lap. "Excuse me?"

Nathan smirks and rotates on the bench we're sitting on to see me better. "You're clearly obsessed with him."

"I am not," I grumble, breaking eye contact with Nate as I take another bite of my whipped-cream-covered waffle. "You're obsessed with him."

"Honestly, I'm more of a Chris girl." Nathan laughs loudly when I scowl at him. "Come on, Cal. You talk about him all the time. You can't tell me you're not into him."

"I am not into him." I elbow Nate in the ribs and grin into my cup when he swears under his breath.

Since Nate arrived three days ago, we've practically been attached at the hip. As much as I love my other friends, there's something different about Nate. He handles my uncontrollable bitchiness with ease and lets me complain for ages before he eventually tells me to get over myself. Bryn and Madi have been so supportive the entire trip, but confiding in them always comes with an extra layer of emotion. With Nate, I can rant about my problems and he will simply say, "That fucking sucks" and then ask if I want to go find more food. It's easy with him.

After Bryn snuck out of our room at dawn to explore the city, I couldn't fall asleep. When I texted Nate, he answered immediately and said that if he didn't eat in the next half an hour, he would turn into a fire-breathing dragon.

And so here we are, eating Belgian waffles in Antwerp, Belgium. We ordered our food from a small cafe, and now we're sitting in the courtyard outside, surrounded by gothic-style buildings. The sun is hidden behind a thick layer of grey clouds and a chilly wind whispers with the promise of rain. Nathan and I are shivering, but the warm waffles in our bellies and the smell of chocolate and espresso surrounding us make up for the cold.

"Let's just pretend for a second," Nate nudges me slightly, drawing my attention back to him. "Say you did like Matt. What's holding you back from making a move?"

"Well, for starters, he's an asshole." I shove another bite of waffle into my mouth before passing the last bit to Nathan, who eagerly accepts my leftovers. "I know he's one of your best friends, but he's a dick to me. He's proved that multiple times."

Nate studies me for a moment, his brow furrowed, before he shrugs. "Okay. Can we go find ice cream?"

I roll my eyes but rise to my feet, taking the last sip of my latte before tossing it in the nearby trash can. "You're ridiculous."

"Ridiculously handsome? Thank you!" Nate beams at me as he links his arm through mine to lead the way through the bustling square. "I think you're quite beautiful yourself."

My mouth curves into a smile and I tighten my arm in Nate's. "You know, twenty years ago, my mom was in this very square and a guy told her basically the same thing."

"Oh, yeah? You read that in her journal?" Nate glances sideways at me, curious to know the full story. He is the only one I've been keeping updated on what I've read in my mom's journal. She really went on such an incredible trip, and it's been amazing to read about not only the places she visited but the relationships she built with the people she travelled with.

"Yeah. Do you remember Sam? He was the one from England."

"Is he the one who initially hit on her at the museum?" Nate confidentially turns a corner down a beautiful street. I doubt he knows where he's going, but I don't mind wandering until he finds his precious ice cream.

I shake my head, stepping closer to Nate to avoid a teenage boy racing past on his scooter. "No, that was Peter. Sam's the funny one."

"Right." Nate nods in recollection. "He told your mom she was beautiful?"

"Yeah. Mom totally fangirled about it in her journal." My heart lightens at the thought of my mom being smitten with a boy. She hasn't dated anyone since my dad, so I've never seen her in love. "I'm betting they hook up at some point. From what my mom's written, Sam was totally into her."

"Just like Matt's totally into you!"

I don't hesitate to shove Nathan away from me, laughing when he stumbles into a pole and whines dramatically.

Nate's rubbing his forehead when his eyes catch on something over my shoulder, causing his entire face to light up. "Ice cream!"

Without hesitation, he charges past me into the small gelato shop, leaving me to catch up. I'm still chuckling as I catch the door as it swings shut behind him. Man, I'm glad he's here.

💋

Ariana spends the entire time I'm doing her hair and makeup talking about how much she's loved being on tour. How nice the fans are, how wonderful the triplets are, how beautiful Europe is, yap yap yap. I offer a remark here and there, but mostly stay quiet, since Ariana is content to talk enough for the both of us.

Typically, Bryn will hang out in Ariana's dressing room while I get the popstar ready, but today she and Madi are lingering near the meet and greet to meet a fan who apparently loves the two of them. Rainyskater or something, I think they said her username was. But it's irrelevant to me since I'm stuck here making Little Miss Perfect look even more perfect.

When I finally finish putting Ariana's hair in the complicated half-up half-down braid hairstyle she requested, she does her usual squeal when she looks in the mirror, tells me how good of a job I did, and flounces out of the dressing room to go see her stylist.

The door slams shut behind her and I immediately beeline to the small black couch in the corner, sighing when the couch delightfully sinks under my weight. The smell of hair spray is mildly stifling, but after spending so much of my life in a hair salon, it's comforting. It reminds me of Mom, and that is a nice thought after being overstimulated by Ariana's constant need to talk.

My phone begins to buzz in my pocket, and when I see Mom's face flash across the screen, my lips crack wide in a smile. "Hi, Mama."

"Hi, sweetie." Mom's angelic voice filters through the phone. "How's my beautiful girl today?"

I exhale a deep breath and settle further into the couch as the weight of the world is lifted off my shoulders. A simple conversation with Mom fixes everything. "I am good. I haven't talked to you in a few days, how are you?"

"I know, I'm sorry, I've been shockingly busy!" Mom laughs, the sound lifting my spirits even further. "You remember your Great Aunt Linda? She came to visit Aunt Sarah and I, and it's been lively. At eighty-five years old, she still has a lot of oomph."

"Is she the one who bought me a dirtbike when I was eight?" I stand from the couch and wander over to the singular window. It looks out over a busy road, but the sight of Antwerp's magnificent buildings lies beyond.

"The dirtbike I promptly returned?" Mom laughs again. "Yes, that's her."

"I'm glad you had a nice visit." I crack the window, allowing a cool breeze into the room. The wind carries the faint hum of passing cars and the occasional chatter of pedestrians, but it all blurs into white noise against the weight in my chest. I miss Mom more than anything.

"Enough about me." The sound of rustling echoes over the phone, and I imagine Mom shifting her weight in her favourite seat in the sunroom. "Are you still having a good time?"

"I am," I say honestly, leaning against the window frame as I watch cars drive by. "Remember Nathan, Chris' best friend who I've been talking to a lot? He flew out as a surprise a few days ago. It's been really nice getting to spend time with him."

"I'm happy to hear that," Mom sighs happily. "Callie, I'm so glad you've found good friends. It's been hard to watch you be so lonely over the last few years. You deserve so much more than what life has given you."

"I haven't been lonely, Mom," I whisper, even though she is right. The last few years have been the loneliest of my life. Until I met Bryn, Mom was the only person I really had. "You've always been enough for me, you know that."

Mom sniffles, and when she speaks, her voice cracks with emotion. "And you've always been enough for me. I love you so much, baby."

"I love you too, Mom." I hastily swipe at the stray tears falling down my cheeks. "I should go, but I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay, honey. I love you endlessly."

The line disconnects, once again leaving me alone with far too many emotions bubbling up in my chest. I miss my mom.

A slight scuffle of a shoe against the floor sounds behind me, and my heart leaps into my throat as I realize I'm not alone. I whirl around, half-expecting Ariana to have returned, but when my gaze lands on a guilty-looking Matt, my eyes narrow.

"Are you eavesdropping?" I hiss, crossing my arms over my chest.

Matt drops his hand from where he is reaching for the handle of the closed door, his expression shifting from guilty to defensive. "No. I didn't realize you were on the phone. I was about to leave, I swear."

I roll my eyes and drop my arms, fury racing through my veins. "As if I would believe that! I didn't even hear the door open, which means you came in quietly! You should have knocked first!"

Matt's gaze drops to the floor and he sheepishly nods. "You're right. I'm sorry."

My eyebrows fly upwards, not expecting to hear an apology. But it doesn't take long for Matt to ruin it.

"Was that your mom on the phone?" he asks quietly, hesitantly meeting my gaze. "How is she?"

The fire in my veins turns to ice, and my face narrows into a glare. "As if you care."

"I do care," Matt says softly, his eyes not leaving mine. "Listen, Callie, I wanted to apoligize."

I immediately shake my head. "Nope. Not happening."

Matt bites his lip, clearly trying not to get angry with me. He takes a deep breath before speaking again. "Callie, what I said to you was fucked up. But I think what was even worse was that I didn't try to apoligize sooner. I let you leave, and I shouldn't have. I'm sorry for what I said, and I'm sorry for how I acted after. I was an ass."

Matt's words prick at my heart, but I once again shake my head. "I don't want to hear it. Please leave."

"Callie, come on," Matt pleads, stepping closer to me. "I know what I said was fucked up, but you have to understand that I didn't mean any of it. I was having a panic attack, for fuck's sake. I barely even remember what I said. All I remember is you calming me down and the look of hurt on your face."

I pause for a second, his words sounding far too convincing. But I only falter for a second before tipping my chin up defiantly. There is no way I'm letting him back in again. "I don't care. It doesn't matter."

"It does matter!" Matt's patience slips and his voice rises an octave, his eyes flashing with intensity. "Fuck, Callie, I can't stop thinking about Amalfi! I can't stop thinking about you in general! I can't keep doing this anymore!"

"Ironic that you're thinking about me but spending all your time with Ariana," I retort, my hands clenched into fists.

"I was trying to make you jealous!" Matt snaps, his face flushed with rage. "And you're one to talk! Since when are you and Nathan a thing?"

"Ha!" I laugh sharply, but the sound isn't real. My stomach is rolling with fury, and more than anything I want to punch Matt between his eyes. "He's just my friend, jackass! You've unfortunately been the only one I can think about since I met you, so calm down with the bullshit assumptions."

"If I've been the only one you can think about, why are you pushing me away?" Matt's chest heaves for breath, our fast-paced argument wearing both of us out. But yet, I could keep fighting for hours, and the funny thing is, I think he could too.

"Because my feelings are irrelevant!" I shout, furious with both him and myself now. These are supposed to be things I keep to myself, but I can't seem to shut my mouth. "I can't focus on what I feel, because every time I do, I get hurt! And you clearly hate me!"

"I don't hate you." Matt's voice softens ever so slightly. "Not even close."

My pulse skips a beat at Matt's words, but I shake my head and step backwards. "Well, I hate you."

Matt's eyes meet mine, his irises looking bluer than ever. It's intoxicating. "I don't think you do. Callie, there's something between us. I know you feel it too. Let me prove you can trust me. Give me another chance. I won't let you down, I promise."

My heart is screaming at me to say yes, to agree to everything Matt is saying. Because the time I spent with him, like really spent with him, was the happiest I've been in years. But happiness like that is dangerous. And it's best to avoid it. "You can't do this, Matt!" My voice cracks, the words slicing through the air like a whip.

"Do what?" Matt demands, his voice rising again. He takes another step closer, the heat radiating off of him almost as suffocating as my own fury. "Care? Be here for you? God forbid anyone tries to–"

"Stop it!" I snap, japping a finger in his chest. His hand catches my wrist before I can pull away, his grip firm but not harsh. My breath falters for a second at the heat of his skin, and my pulse lurches when I see his eyes drop to my lips.

"No!" I push Matt away, causing him to stumble backwards. "You don't get to do that! You can't just demand I let you back in! I hate you, Matt!"

Matt's eyes blaze, his posture tense. "Tell me why you hate me."

"I hate that I can't get you out of my head!" I explode, my voice drowning out the sound of the world outside the open window. "I hate the way you make me feel, and I hate that I want you to kiss me! You're messing with my head, Matt, and I can't take it anymore!"

In the back of my mind, warning sirens are blaring fire red, but they are irrelevant. My walls are crumbling, and I'm hopeless to stop them from falling. I'm so furious, nothing else matters.

"You think I don't feel the same?" Matt yells, raking his hands through his hair. The energy between us simmers like a live wire, the temperature in the room increasing by a million degrees. "Fuck, Callie, you're stuck in my head all the time! All I want to do is fight with you, kiss you, make you furious. How am I supposed to deal with that?"

"I obviously don't know!" My voice cracks slightly, trembling with more than just anger now. "I don't even know what you want from me!"

"Everything," Matt bites out, his tone low and rough. "I want everything. And it's driving me insane."

Before I can respond, Matt closes the distance between us, his hands on my hips as he roughly pushes me back against the wall. And before I know what's happening, his lips are on mine, his mouth hot with frustration and need.

I respond immediately, kissing him like I've been dreaming about doing in the dark of night. It's a clash of lips and teeth, rough and messy. I curse when Matt bites my bottom lip, and he hisses when I yank on his hair. We're still fighting, just not with words anymore.

My hands fist in his cotton shirt to tug him closer, and his thumbs dig into my hips as he pushes me further into the wall. The world spins around me and my mind distantly screams at me to push him away, but I can't. The heat of his mouth and the pressure of his body against mine are intoxicating, and all I can think about is having more.

"I hate you so much," I mumble, digging my fingers into the muscles in Matt's back as he trails kisses down my neck.

Matt bites my neck in response. "Shut the fuck up," he growls into my skin, sending vibrations through my body, before quickly reclaiming my lips with his own.

I smirk against his mouth, considering saying something else to wind him up. He's so hot when he's mad.

But when his hands slip under my shirt, the ability to form words becomes foreign, and all I am aware of is Matt.

carasobsession ❀

matt eavesdropping on callie and her mom ✅
angry kiss scene ✅
cara being the most girls girl ever ✅

i swear if one of you asked me to send matt and callie to the moon i would find a way to do it LMAO

we're getting into the final crunch of this book! on estimate, i would guess at max ten more chapters :) so let me know if there's any more scenes or whatnot that you would like!

question of the day! if you could be friends with any fictional character, who are you choosing? i would love more than anything to be besties with the weasley twins. and avery from the inheritance games would be a great friend

i love you all sooooo much and i hope you're having a great week!!! see you soon 😋

🍉 🍉 🍉