Clang clang clang.

"Alyssa!" 

I woke with a start to Tyler's voice, and the sound of someone knocking on the outside of the metal ball I slept in. 

Along with how long I had been sleeping for, the ball also kept track of how I was doing health wise, and, if something was off, healed whatever it was that was keeping me from being alright. The contraption may be a little flashy, but I'll take looking strange with knowing I won't die in my sleep any day. 

I yawned, haphazardly brushing my fingers along the wall to find the button to lower the ball. Once it did, I saw Tyler standing in front of me. 

"I will never get over how cool that looks." He said. 

"Yeah, technology is awesome. What's up?" I asked, stretching my arms. 

The name was barely out of his mouth before I realized there was only one thing he could have been waking me up for. 

"Jenna's out by the tree again."

"The tree?" I asked, even though I should have known. My brain tends to slow down right after waking up. 

He gave me a look. "What other tree is there?"

"Actually, countless others." 

He didn't laugh at my joke, and I wasn't expecting him to. He had changed a lot in the past two weeks. He barely laughed at anything anymore. He didn't tend to talk to anyone much either. It was worrying all of us, but I brushed the thought aside. 

"Okay, fine, tough crowd. I'll go see her." 

"Thanks." Tyler said. "You're the only one who seems to get through to her anymore." 

I shrugged. "What can I say? I have a way with words." 

"Sure. I'm going to bed. G'night." 

"Night, Tyler." 

I watched him trudge into the other room in the small shelter. I didn't think people actually trudged. 

I shook my head, clearing my slightly ADD mind for the second time in two minutes, and walked out of the house. I knew exactly where I was going. 

***

I heard her voice before I saw her, quiet, but still distinct.

"Deep in the meadow, under the willow, a bed of grass, a soft green pillow..."

I recognized the song, barely. Cameron told me about a song most people in the Kingdom sang at funerals, and that it was a sort of tradition.

"Lay down your head and close your sleepy eyes, and when again they open, the sun will rise. Here it's safe, and here it's warm, here the daisies guard you from all harm-"

I made the mistake of stepping on a twig, and she stopped.

"I'm not in the mood to talk, Alyssa." She said, not bothering to look back.

"You never are." I said, looking up at the words carved into the bark.

IN MEMORY OF JEREMY

COOLEST BROTHER THIS SIDE OF THE WORLD

Shane had found her there the night after we all either helped to or watched the others carve the words. He said she wouldn't leave, and everyone tried to convince her, but she didn't budge.

That is, until I gave it a shot.

I never knew why, but I was the only one Jenna would listen to. Maybe it was because everyone else reminded her of him somehow, but I didn't know how I was excluded from the crowd. Either way, I was just happy I could bring her back before she did something drastic, like run away or something.

"You're not going to just leave me alone, are you?" She asked.

"Not a chance. I'm not going to leave you to cry alone."

"I haven't been crying. I'm fine." She muttered.

"Crying doesn't make you weak, you know. It means you have feelings." I said, sitting down next to her.

"I'm not saying that because I think crying equals weakness, I just-".

She stopped, sighing. "I don't know."

"Jenna, you know you have every right in the book to cry over this, right?" I asked. "He was your brother. I'd be concerned if you haven't been crying, honestly."

"I know. But I think I've hit the point where I'm just...numb. I feel empty. But I shouldn't feel empty. I shouldn't be so sad all the time. I'm supposed to be the happy one."

"Happy is just an emotion. An emotion can't define your whole personality."

"Well, with me, it does."

"Jenna," I said. "If you were happy every day of your life, you wouldn't be a person, you'd be a game show host."

She turned to me, raising an eyebrow. "Did you just quote Heathers?"

"Give me a break." I said, giving her a smile. "I'm not an original wisdom machine."

"No, I mean, how do you even know that quote? You're from space."

"Quinn showed it to me before the big attack." I said.

"And didn't invite me? I love that movie." Jenna asked.

I gave her a look. "You were there, Jenna. You passed out from a sugar rush twenty minutes in."

"Oh yeah. You shouldn't have let Quinn bring cake."

"I barely knew what cake was. Anyway," I said. "What I meant was, you shouldn't feel like you have to be happy all the time. Stuff like this happens, and it sucks, and you deserve to be upset about it. You shouldn't feel bad because you aren't happy."

"Yeah, but still." She said. "I've always been the happy one. I told Quinn I knew exactly how to control my emotions all the time. It's who I am. Take that away, and what am I?"

"Easy. You're the funniest person I've ever met, you're super brave, and you were strong enough to get up after what happened to Jeremy and continue on."

"I only did that because you convinced me to."

"Yes, but if you really weren't able to, nothing I would have said would have convinced you." I replied. "Just because you're known as the optimist doesn't mean you're nothing else."

"I guess so." She said. "I just don't know if I'll ever go back to being happy again. It sure doesn't feel like I will."

"You will, eventually."

"How do you know?" She asked. "He was my best friend, I can't exactly bounce back after watching my best friend die."

"I'm not saying you'll bounce back. I'm saying you'll be okay someday. Maybe not perfectly the same as you were, but you'll be alright."

There was a pause, but right as I was about to continue, she spoke up.

"Thanks, Alyssa."

"No problem." I said. "You ready to go back? It's pretty late, you need some sleep."

"Not yet. I want to stay a little longer."

"Alright. I won't push you."

We sat in silence for a while, before she started up her song again.

"Here your dreams are sweet, and tomorrow brings them true, here is the place, where I, love you..."

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The art this week is by MarshmellowPaint! They made a really awesome bookmark that looks amazing! :D