(Not Obito. That's a separate chapter)

(I spent like 30 minutes trying to find this picture ngl)

EmsShips

akatsukimemberTobi

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AG: [arm is in a sling because of a skateboarding accident] Whaz up! Today's ship is....

Sakura: Not missing a beat today are ya?

AG: Nope!.... But before I reveal the ship..... Uchiha Zombie!

Obito: For the last fucking time! I didn't die!! But those two look like they did die! [points at Pein and Hidan]

Hidan: Oi! AG! What the fuck does Lady look like again?! Cause I think she was the one who beat the fucking shit outta us with that batton!!

AG: Brown hair, blonde at the bottom. Dark brown eyes. Roundish face, like mochi round. 5 foot 7 inches. Usually she has either a poker face on or a fake smile. Loves Dr. Pepper and cats and she's Pan A sexual! She's pretty shy too. That's why she doesn't let y'all see her face.

Hidan: YEP! SHE BEAT THE SHIT OUTTA US!

Pein: What I do?!

Com Lady: You upset my boy, akatsukimemberTobi , so you pay with your blood

Hidan: The fuck did I do you Chocolate and Caramel mochi lookin' bitch?

Com Lady: Well you devil worshipin' silver snowflake lookin' ass hoe, dyslexic apricot excuse for a human! You stole my food and and a cake that my friend, I hope I call you my friend, made!

AG: [losing her shit] T- th- t- th f- f- fuck Lady?!

Sakura: "Dyslexic apricot excuse for a human!"?!?! Wh-what the fuck?!?! [laughing]

Pedo Clown-Magician Man-Thing in the vents: [losing his fucking mind] ♡!

Everyone (including Lady (aka me!) and Hidan): [losing their fucking shit]

AG: You're so fucking extra!

Com Lady: I aim to please!!

Madara: That is the best thing I've ever heard come out of someone's mouth!

Sakura: I can't wait to tell 'Nark and the others that one!

AG: But anyways! We have a ship to cover!

Com Lady: A lot of ships actually! The rest are crossover ships! And AG has some more to do after that!

AG: Ugh! We're gonna be swimming in paperwork!

Com Lady: AG, put your big girl underwear on and-!

AG: [turns around and looks down her shorts] Lady? I don't wear female underwear. You realise that right?

Com Lady: [sighs] Boxers, briefs, or trunks?

AG: Trunks

Sakura: We don't need to kno- [hand gets put over her mouth]

Deidara: [put the hand over her mouth] [blushing] [horse voice] No continue....

Sakura: [removes his hand] Are you trying to tell me you wanna make out or...... no because it licked my face

Itachi: [grabing a weapon]

Kisame: [gently coxing him to put it down]

Deidara: FUCKING HAND MOUTHS!!! I'm sorry Pinky...... They lick things to often......

AG: You about to be sorry whEN I SHOVE MY FOOT UP YOUR ASS!!

Sakura: [grabs AG and starts to hug her] No it's fine. Just felt weird

Cobra: [walks in] [looks at AG and Sakura] You two cuddlin' or something?

Sakura: [pats AG's head] I'm trying to calm her down and this usually works

AG: [burys her head in the crook of Sakura's neck]

Wendy: [follows in behind Cobra] [looks at Sakura and AG] [grabs Cobra's hand] We're interrupting something [leaves with Cobra]

Sakura: [pats AG's back] You calm?

AG: [lets go] I'm calm.....

Sakura: Good

Naruto: What the-

AG: Anyway! Obito! I need you to go back to being Tobi for the rest of this chapter!!

Obito: Ok [clears his throat]

Tobi: Hi AG - senpai!

AG: Hi Tobi!

Tobi: What did you need Tobi for?

AG: You and Deidara! Thoughts?

Deidara: I'd rather kill myself in an non artful way than be with him

Sakura: He's fucking serious lol

Tobi: Hmmm..... Tobi says ye!

AG: Ok! Everyone else?

Com Lady: Eh. Crack ship.

Itachi: No

Kisame: No

Zetsu: Maybe! No.

Kakuzu: No

Hidan: Fuck no

Sasori: No

Pein: No

Konan: Yea

Madara: Hn

Hashirama: Sure!

Minato: No......

Tsunade: No

Daichi: Nah

Haru: Nope

Kakashi: No

Naruto: No

Sasuke: Hn

Gaara: No.....

Tobi: [clears his throat]

Obito: Not only no! But! Fuck! No!

AG: Eh. Crack! Love y'all! Bye!