Kevin took out his fortune paper from the fortune cookie... And it said...

'This bad luck... Shall be a lustful night... Because you'll need a lot of protection.'

Kevin: ...

Michael: What? Something wrong, kid?

Kevin: This piece of shit.

Michael looked at it... and used his future sight. Via, his Magic learned from the College of Winterhold. After 10 seconds... Michael turned to Kevin with concern.

Michael: Kid... This one's real... You need to find a place to hide... And not your hotel room...

Richard: Jesus... I trusted Michael's ability to see into the future, and I survived without getting married to a gold digger...

Darriel: I doubted at first... But after nearly getting STD from a guy... I never doubted him since.

Kevin: You guys probably got lucky...

Kevin left the Chinese Restaurant... While the others...

Michael: Mein gott...

Richard: ... How many... Tell me how many...

Darriel: Can't be that bad! MilitaryPro1 got his shit wrong! He's getting married to Zheng, not Takara! That Yandere bitch can-

Michael: A total of 30.

Darriel: ... Including...

Michael: ... Yep.

Darriel: Welp, he's a dead man. He should've been gay or bisexual like me.

Richard: That's disgusting, Darriel...

Michael: No wonder he hates-

Darriel took out, Popcorns along with Coca-Colas and his camera.

Darriel: Anyways, want some? I know a place for our first-class seats!~

Michael & Richard: Ok./Sure.

Kevin...

As he's walking back to his hotel room... He saw Jean Bart of the Vichya.

Kevin: Miss Jean Bart? Isn't nighttime dangerous for...

She got close and her eyes were heart-shaped pupils along with a blushing face. And she's breathing heavily... Like a Succubus with her dearest husband...

Jean Bart: Viens ici, mon amour.~ Je te rembourserai avec mon corps.~ "Come here, my love.~ I'll pay you back with my body.~"

Kevin: ... Fuck...

It's just as bad as his sister going crazy when she saw him again...

Kevin's Sister: Big Brother... Let's kill each other!~

Kevin: ... So, this is how Ragna feels... Dealing with his psychopathic brother...

And then he used his secret technique...

Kevin: RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!! 'NIGERUNDAYO!!!'

Jean Bart: Wha-!? Come back here!!!

It was foggy, but Kevin managed to lose her... As the got out to run to the next area...

Richelieu: Let's be together, like French Mistress in love with a Vietnamese Servant.~

Kevin: OH NEIN!!! 'NO!!!'

A 180 turn and running like war has come to Vietnam again. With Richelieu chasing him.

Richelieu: Don't be shy, dear!~ There's nothing wrong with being a husband.~

Kevin: *INDOCHINA WAR PTSD!!!* GO AWAY, COLONIST!!!

With that, he managed to lose Richelieu... We went Solid Snake and crawl to the Hotel...

Only for him to get spotted by...

Cleveland: Erm... What are you doing, Kevin?

Kevin: ... Nothing. PTSD...

Cleveland: Eheheh... You're both a strange and funny guy, Kevin... But, how about we can go together? You know, maybe a drink from the vending machine?

He wanted a drink, but he was more worried about wanting to die as a lone virgin.

Kevin: I would love to, but I have to-

Cleveland: Don't think you can run away from me... My Phoenix Commander.~

With her voice now darkens along with heart-shaped pupils...

Kevin: Well, the weather is not to your advantage.

Cleveland: Looks like you're playing hard to get.~ Get him, girls!

Kevin tried to run, but he got surrounded by Montpelier, Denver, and Colombia. All have heart-shaped pupils with a face of lust and thirst for his seed...

Kevin: What in the name of Lenin's Frozen Balls is this!?

Montpelier: Just shut up and pull down your pants.~

???: Fufufufu... Is that so...?

Kevin: *Recognize the Voice and Run* EEK!!! GET AWAY!!!

It was Takara that Kevin just immediately run.

Takara: KEVIN-SENPAI!!!~ JUST BE MY HUSBAND AND I'LL GIVE YOU A HAPPY LIFE!!!~

Cleveland: DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY!!!

The thick fog helped him a lot, and he escaped via a manhole. And escaped to another manhole.

Kevin: Now I smell like an Imperial peasant, covered in shit...

He took a public bathroom to clean himself up... Even using soap to clean his body...

But he forgot he violated Rule 16 against the Yanderes, which is Rule 2 of Zombieland. Beware of Bathrooms. He accidentally ended up in a girl's bathroom... And a stall door opened for a...

Jeanne: Bonjour... My Lord Commander.~

Kevin:

https://youtu.be/GhIWeLOAljw

Crashing through concrete. With his own mark...

Kevin kept running as if Bernard wanted his booty hole... And there's one blocking his path.

Jalter (Jeanne Alter): Stop right there, slav-!

Out by Flight or Fight response, she got a flying kick to the face full force. Knocking her out. He kept running...

Mashu: You think you can run?~ My little Phoenix?~

Kevin: Augh!!! How many are they!?

Meanwhile...

Darriel: Bwahahahahaha!!!

There's Ghuzt_D_Bloodedge, EmperorItsukaShido, AwesomeNinja1027, FranztelAimierBeale, TheBreizhOne, and Darkoreahhhh. Watching the chaos that Darriel has put the Vietnamese Phoenix in... While having popcorn and soda.

While lamgiabao2017 and Pro1 are playing Hearts of Iron 4 with Asra and Ezra.

Michael: Mein gott... Why did you do this to the kid...?

Darriel: Why not?~

Richard: He's going to die from high blood pressure...

Shido: Who cares! I like watching this!

Ghuzt: ... You're crazy...

Richard: It's deaf ears, Ghuzt. He likes doing this to Kevin... And it's nearly October...

Breizh: Hon! Hon! Hon! I hope he loses his life, but he better steer clear of my Richelieu!

Darkie: Heh. You mean MY Richelieu?

Darriel: Damn! He got away again, but not for long.~

Back to the Lone Phoenix...

https://youtu.be/iBuj88v5fV8

An other one was from Honkai Impact... Kiana, Mei and Bronya. Tried to catch him, but his faith in a Machine God paid off. He's now too fast and with the fog getting thicker... He disappeared. With the Jumping Jack on the floor.

Kevin: ... Okay. Honkai, Azur, Fate, and even my fucking Yandere... What's next? Counter: Side?

And a pair of arms hugged him.

Seo Yoon: That's right.~

Shin Jia: You know what that means, Phoenix?~ It's time to be a father.~

Kevin: ... I fought for the U.N. and the Human Race for this...?

And made another run. This time firing tranquilizers at him.

Again, with the environment on his side, the Phoenix was able to keep quiet by ditching his sandals. They've lost him. This time by Notre Dame.

Kevin: Looks like Michael is right... But it's now like Manhunt with Joel Lambert...

Elizabeth Pendragon: And yet you're alive.

Kevin quickly took cover as she tossed throwing knives at him. Having no choice, Kevin jumps through the window. And ran through the thick fog.

Now both the Horni Girls and the Lone Phoenix can't see shit... But the Spectators now looking at him via Thermal Goggles.

And then he bumped into... Roon.

Roon: Command-

Kevin: ДАЙТЕ МЕНЯ СИМО ХАЙХА!!! "GET ME SIMO HAYHA!!!"

And off to the Thick Fog... Hiding like a Viet Cong.

Roon: Huh... Do you think you can escape me, Phoenix? LIKE IF THAT WAS POSSIBLE!!!

With a high-velocity dash, she quickly gained distance to Kevin... Only to slam herself at a building with a 150mm Shell. He was no longer here.

Kevin may be a moron in Love but in Warfare... He was Good. And in this scenario, he knows the location, thanks to his landmarking skill during his service. He's not too far from the Hotel he's staying, but there are a lot of them looking for him there...

He decided to just find another hotel, away from the one they were looking for him...

Which is a smart move... As there's not a single of the Girls from other dimensions... Who wants his virginity and his seed... Just the Citizens of France...

Luckily, Kevin still have his wallet and his iPhone 13 in his pocket...

With that, he went to another Hotel for a Night's stay and rest... But...

At Midnight...

???: Wake up.~

Kevin: Hm... Wha-?

It's the very same Girls he tried to run from... there are even some T-Dolls from G&K, a few female Operators from Arknights... And there's even Takara...

Shin Jia: Run away all you want.~

Richelieu: But once they wanted you to be a father...

Takara: It's Owari Da for your Virginity.~

Kevin:

'Take me to Church. I'll worship like a dog at your shrines of lies...'

'I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your Axe. Offer me that brutal death.'

'Oh, Truck-kun, take me to 40K!'

'Take me to Church. I'll worship like a dog at your shrines of lies...'

'I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your Axe. Offer me that brutal death.'

'Oh, Truck-kun, take me to 40K!'