Shay clapped her hands to quieten the girls and boys. The place was packed because they had taken in as many children as they could, over the winter season. It was unbearable to think of all the poor children left to fend for themselves in the snow.

The Christmas meal wouldn't be much better than normal. The only difference was, the bread-and-butter pudding to be served later. Shay also had a surprise parcel of barley sugar set aside.

"I want you to all line up and once your bowl is full, please find a seat so we may say grace." She held up her hand. "And no pushing or shoving because there will be no surprise for anyone who does. There is plenty of stew and bread so take your time."

She sat down with Sister Teresa, Mary and Albert. The children followed each other in single file, where more nuns filled their bowls, and then sat in any available spot they could find. Some on the bench seating and others on the floor. Albert had finished lining the old stable, which now housed the boys. It still wasn't the warmest of places, so they had laid hay all over the floor to help keep the cold out. Because it was jammed packed, the body heat from everyone, also helped.

Shay tucked into her bowl of stew. She was so hungry. Of late she, Mary and Albert were working longer hours. Shay looked up to see them sitting close, smiling and whispering to each other. A relationship, which was more than just a friendship, was forming. She was very happy for them. They were both wonderful people and deserved to be loved by someone. This thought had Shay thinking about her family. Tonight, they would be all sitting in the formal dining room eating roast pork. She hoped it wasn't Missus Picks. A smile crept over her face. The fire would be crackling and she could bet Pavey would have made a big plum pudding. The only two missing would be herself and Julia. Shay wondered what she was doing tonight in Paris. Julia, she knew, had chosen to stay over the holiday season, so she would be able to return for a few weeks in April, to attend some of the Season's events. Not that she was coming out, but she wanted to go to the races in Ludgershall, where one of Papa's beautiful Arabian horses would be running.

The thought of the Season didn't bring any joy to Shay. She just knew there were going to be problems, because Papa expected her to attend and be agreeable to finding a husband. Shay sighed and looked over at Mary and Albert again. It would never matter if Mary didn't marry, so why did it matter so much for a girl, who was raised and treated like a daughter of a wealthy family, to marry. Shay could never really understand it. Mama had tried to explain it once.

Wealthy parents wanted wealthy husbands for their daughters, because they didn't want her to live a life, she wasn't accustomed to. Shay took another spoonful of her stew. It didn't bother her if she had to work to survive. She looked around at all the children and realised she was lying to herself. Even though she was working hard, she still lived in a nice warm house. She would always have food in her belly, and the love and support of her family. To really live as these children's parents did, would be horrible. Most had probably never wanted to abandon their children, but had just not been able to support them.

However, to abandon your child, was the worst possible outcome for the imp. If the parent couldn't support themselves, then how was the child expected too. Shay sighed again. A tear trickled over her lashes and onto her cheek. She was so lucky. If Papa had never found her in the woods with that evil man, she would most likely be dead already. She now understood what the peddler's intentions had been, and why those men had hit her, and torn away her clothes.

Every now and then she wondered if this was the reason she never wanted to marry. To be expected to submit her body to the man she married, made her feel ill every time she thought about it, and then to have to obey him, because he was a man.

When these thoughts came to her, she always pushed them aside, because Papa didn't tell Mama what to do. They loved each other dearly. Mama always smiled when he touched her or kissed her cheek, which meant she liked him touching her. However, there were the stories she was told at school by the other girls, of how their fathers dominated their mothers, and of course, Madame Le Fleure was always going on about what a man expected from his wife, and how she must be obedient.

Through all of this, Shay had somehow come to the conclusion, she never wanted to marry. She just knew Papa was going to be very pushy when the next Season arrived.

"Shay. Shay my dear." Sister Teresa tapped her on the arm.

"Oh, I am sorry, Sister. I was miles away." Shay smiled and looked around the room. The children were lining up for Bread and Butter Custard.

"I was just wondering when you wanted to hand out the candy," Sister Teresa said.

"Let's surprise them after they've finished their pudding."

I can understand Shay's thoughts on marriage. Can you?

However, I do hope she falls in love with someone special. ♥♥

She's doing such wonderful work. ♥♥

Photo taken from Period Paper Historic Art