Troubled
The Woshua died under the blade, dust scattering with their last desperate cry of fear. A Moldsmol not far off started sliding away in terror, only for them to follow, easily catching up with the slow jello and cutting them down with nothing more than a panicked wiggle.
They could do nothing, their actions were not, he was not in control, he wasn't in control, he couldn't stop- couldn't stop, they were all dying and it was all his fault-
Somebody. Somebody.
Help. Please. Somebody stop me, please! PLEASE! HELP ME! HELP ME! HELP ME HELP ME HELP ME K̶̛̘̖̤͉͕͎͆̈̊̔̔̓Ǐ̵̹̟̤̱̑̐͆̑̀̚L̶͓͔̱̳͗̍̈́̀͘L̵̲̬̺͉̝̜̲͉̮̅͠ ̸̰̞̌͑͛̓̅̏̆̚M̷̛͔̳̦̙͛̍̚E̵̡͔͓͔̬͍͗̑̆͂̅̎͌͜!
He jolted awake, gasping.
It took a minute or so for him to realize where he was.
He was on the ground, leaning against the rock wall behind him, Papyrus beside him with a blanket draped over the both of them as the sky lit up all around the mountain. It was beautiful. And it was nothing like that horrific nightmare that had shocked him awake.
Sans clutched his shirt, bewildered and confused.
"..Frisk?"
Nothing but birdsong answered him.
Luckily for his scattered and spooked thoughts, he noticed a familiar transparent silhouette floating about the edge of the cliff. Sans blinked, then carefully extricated himself from the blanket without disturbing Papyrus so he could head over.
"Heya, Nappy."
The ghost flinched, then faced him, spirit headphones slipping off his head.
"𝙷𝚒, 𝚂𝚊𝚗𝚜…"
"You okay, buddy?"
"𝚈𝚎𝚊𝚑.. 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚞𝚜𝚒𝚌…"
"You up for conversation?"
"𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠.. 𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞.."
"Trust me buddy, you're not being a bother."
"...𝚈𝚎𝚊𝚑…"
Napstablook slid his headphones off, offering them to Sans to listen to. He regarded them for a moment, then shrugged, picking them up with blue magic and setting them on his own skull.
It started with an awkward strumming of a guitar, then turned to a chill beat, guitar playing alongside it calmly. Napstablook cautiously phased through Sans to listen as well, to which he just sat on the ledge and stared out at the view and the distant ocean beyond.
The breeze gently brushed his jacket, whistling faintly as it whooshed into the cavern behind him. The mountaintop blocked the early morning rays from him and a good portion of forest ahead of him, trees swaying with a dull roar of creaking wood and shuffling leaves.
He could just vibe here for an hour or so with this tune bouncing around in his skull, doing nothing at all.
But then.
"I feel cold,
Under the sun.
Even when the pain is gone, I know,
Names written in ice will melt away..
Just as I have done.."
He smiled.
"Nice music." He murmured.
"𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔𝚜.."
He kicked his feet to the beat and watched the trees rolling in the wind, towers gleaming in the sunlight miles away.
When the soft voice sang again, he murmured along.
"I feel cold,
Under the sun.
Even when the pain is gone, I know-
Names written in ice will melt away..
Just as I have done."
He let his sockets slide shut, swaying side to side.
It was a nice moment in time, safe and free.
A moment where anxiety could be forgotten, if only for a little while.
Then it drew to a sweet close, something that bade him to return to the world and notice someone sitting beside him.
Or rather, a box was next to him, gleaming in the light.
"Mettaton?" Sans blinked, bewildered that the star of the Underground- a beloved rectangle- wanted anything to do with him so soon.
Normally they met about a month after the Barrier was broken.. but those were in the Resets.
The robot sighed, tiles of his face flickering in indecision.
"Did Napstablook give you his headphones?"
"Uh.." He pulled them off, careful to use a healthy dose of blue magic or they would just phase through everything.
"Guess he wanted me to hear what he had, but yeah. What about it?"
Mettaton regarded him. "Do you know where he is, then? I've been looking for him, and I-" he struck a pose. "-have an offer to make him."
Sans rolled his eyelights before glancing out to the horizon again.
"Sure." He remarked before addressing the ghost.
"Hey Naps, you up for chatting with the Underground's favorite box?"
Mettaton leaned back, tiles flashing in annoyance before Napstablook drifted into view.
"𝚈𝚎𝚊𝚑." He murmured with more certainty than was usual for the anxious one.
Though Mettaton was suddenly a lot less calm.
"Blooky! Were you just- what?? What was that!?"
"Woah, chill out, pal. We were just both vibin'."
"No, he was in you, it's not-"
"Mettaton, I know." He asserted suddenly, intent on getting the other to quiet down before he upset Napstablook further, the ghost backing away and fading in fear.
The robot noticed this, seemingly shocked before he quickly composed himself.
He cared deeply about Napstablook.
"Look. He has a condition." Mettaton explained quietly, so Napstablook couldn't hear.
"Are you putting yourself in danger to make him feel better, Sans? I would think both your issues would hurt you."
He scoffed.
"You know I wouldn't do that. I appreciate the sentiment, but Nappy's just a lonely guy like me with people overreacting to his problem. I already know about that, he explained it himself. And not to mention that it doesn't bother me at all. No amount of electricity he can make should hurt me." He explained severely, before leaning back.
"I'm just his friend."
"But it's not just that, he was in you. That's.. not something ghosts are supposed to do. Inhabiting a living thing with a Soul is-"
"He's not doing that. We're just taking up the same space. Besides, he's helped me. My issue? Dude saved my life shielding me. Least I can do is try to be a better friend to the guy. God knows he needs someone rooting for him."
Mettaton hesitated, staring at him. Sans couldn't read his expression, for Mettaton didn't exactly have a face.
Then the robot sighed. "Look." He waved his hand dismissively at Sans.
"I don't trust you. Napstablook is my only family, and I'm not having some sleazy stand-up use my cousin to get at me." Sans blinked, stunned by the words as Mettaton pointed at him, face flashing into mostly red.
"So stay away from my cousin, got it?"
They stared at each other as Sans processed what the hell he'd just said.
"Excuse me?"
It was more of an honest question, he had never heard something like that from the robot before.
But the last Resets, they'd only met after Papyrus had told the star all about his loved but lazy brother.
This was ridiculous.
Sans stood up. "Okay. First of all, I am not a damn sleazeball looking for more fame, got it? I'm just a guy who likes to entertain some people with my puns, and if I get a few g out of it, then great! But you're so focused on your glory that you'd isolate your only family because of it? What the hell is your problem? The dude's got zero self-esteem! He makes me look like a damn superhero with how much he fears everything! People need love and care to exist, and you're depriving him of that. That's.. not fucking okay. So listen here, you box of bolts."
He stepped closer in Mettaton's face, glaring right down at the little camera lense that stared at him, poking the glowing tiles.
"Let your damn family live a life. The world doesn't revolve around you. I can't believe I've known Napstablook this long and never even noticed what you've done to him." He shoved Mettaton back, frustrated and far more riled up than he should have been as he faced the ghost.
"Are you okay?"
Napstablook glanced fearfully between him and Mettaton behind him, crying a little out of habit.
"𝚄𝚑.. 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚑... 𝙸'𝚖 𝚘𝚔𝚊𝚢... 𝙿𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚏𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝.."
He blinked, calming down. "Oh. No. I'm not fighting him. Just a little ticked." He glanced back at the robot, who was silent, but glaring at him in rage.. and disgust? The face wasn't very expressive.
"Do you know what he might have been offering you?"
Napstablook hesitated, trembling slightly.
"𝙸.. 𝙸.. 𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚊.. 𝚍𝚘... 𝙱.. 𝚋𝚞𝚝. 𝙸.. 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝... 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠.. 𝚒𝚏... 𝙸 𝚠..𝚊𝚗𝚝? 𝚃𝚘?.. 𝙰𝚗𝚢..𝚖...𝚘𝚛𝚎...." He shivered violently, unable to function under both gazes.
"Wait, buddy." Sans immediately switched tones, worried about the ghost. "No one's upset with you, it's okay."
He just continued to cry, shaking as he drifted closer to the ground.
"𝙸..𝚖... 𝚜𝚘..𝚛.𝚛𝚢.."
"No, Naps, you don't need to apologise, it's our fault for getting aggres-"
Napstablook rushed at him, splashing with cold and a few visible sparks as he vanished into the skeleton. Sans choked for a moment, falling to his kneecaps and blinking. He could hear Mettaton gasp, standing stiffly in his peripheral vision before he found his footing.
"Okay. Okay. I'm just really cozy, then. Please don't cry on me." He muttered, a little worried for his own safety.
He finally faced Mettaton again, able to read the anger well enough from the robot.
"See? We've upset him now. Not cool."
"We? I had no part in that- you decided to be argumentative, Darling." He spat the word as an insult.
"I wasn't arguing with you, you insulted me. I wasn't even going to bother with the insult; it's the fact that you're completely disregarding your family's emotional state over your own ego."
"I am not!"
"Then let him live his life rather than control it. His life, not yours."
Mettaton seemed close to snapping at him when a deep, commanding voice spoke up from closer to the cave entrance.
"What is going on here?"
They both turned in surprise to see Asgore trudging over, rubbing his eyes. His clothes were crinkled, and his cape looked to have been used as a picnic blanket over the flowers. Mettaton gestured irritably at Sans.
"This Snowdin sentry has been insulting my character and practically holding my family hostage!"
Asgore blinked. He slowly glanced from robot to skeleton, then back to robot. Then he brushed pollen out of his beard and addressed Sans.
"Sans, do you care to explain what I just heard?"
He glanced back at Mettaton, who had paused when the king referred to him so informally, then faced the monarch.
"Well, for starters, I'm not holding anyone hostage. Bolts must've thought that up on the fly or is just that paranoid. And two, I'm telling him off for the crap he's doing to his family. He's got only a cousin, and the little guy's shy to the point of Alphys looking like a daredevil by comparison because of a condition and just.." He shot a look at Mettaton.
"He doesn't really have anyone because Metta isolated him. I'm just trying to prevent a good monster from fading away because someone else was too scared to lose him to let him live in the first place. It's toxic, and I'm his friend."
Asgore regarded him seriously, subtly straightening his cape out. "If you were aware of this already, why did you not do anything of this situation sooner?"
"What?" Mettaton questioned in disbelief. Asgore silenced him as Sans explained.
"That's because I had no idea. Napstablook, he's really reserved. I never knew much about him until recently, when he decided to be a little more open. And even then, I had no idea what Mettaton was doing until just minutes ago when the guy just insulted me because I'm a comedian! Like, c'mon! Can't a guy be funny without someone making it an insult?" He flinched as a particularly sharp volt flickered across his sternum.
Asgore noticed this but let it slide, choosing instead to ask a different question.
"But what would lead Mettaton to thinking you are holding this Napstablook hostage?"
Sans shrugged. "That's a bit more complicated. It's sort of a partnership, really. Figured out that he can be a great Laziness Enabler while I'm a great excuse for him to not directly socialize."
Eyebrows raised, Asgore inquired.
"How so?"
Sans just snorted, amused. "Okay, it's actually a bit more than that, but basically he's just sitting in me."
"Inhabiting?"
"No-no, that'd be in in me, he's just kinda phased through."
"And you allow this?"
"Absolutely."
"And this does not trouble or hinder Napstablook?"
He glanced downward. "I don't think so. Does it, Nappy?"
"..𝙽𝚘…" The ghost whispered faintly. The others had to strain to hear it.
Asgore relaxed then, regarding Mettaton sternly.
"You are aware that manipulation of others to their detriment is a crime?"
Lights flashed in alarm as the robot replied quickly.
"Yes, your Majesty, I was not aware of these effects, I apologise."
"Thank you. I will let this go with a warning for now, and a bit of advice. If Sans is serious about something, then it is best to listen to him. He is wise beyond his years." He rubbed his great paw on Sans's skull with a smile even as the skeleton blushed slightly.
"Aw thanks, Fluffybuns."
The king scoffed, pushing him lightly before striding over to the cliff edge.
"You may leave now, Mettaton, I did have something to discuss with Sans in private."
Mettaton paused, staring at them both before giving up and rolling away.
Sans hesitantly followed his king up to the edge as both sat down.
"I would like to speak with you alone, please." The Dreemur added, clearly meaning Napstablook.
The ghost shifted, realizing what he meant before Sans interrupted.
"You sure he can't stick around? I'm sure whatever it is, he can know."
".. Please. A few minutes."
He sighed, giving in.
"'Aight, Nappy. Think you'll be okay for a few minutes, buddy?"
"... 𝙾𝚔𝚊𝚢... 𝙸'𝚕𝚕 𝚐𝚘.... 𝚂𝚘𝚛𝚛𝚢.."
He parted then, avoiding meeting anyone's gaze. Sans reached out to him. "Hey. It's fine. Just a little bit."
Napstablook just nodded, drifting away.
When he'd left, he gestured after him. "See? I'm worried about him. He's really nice to hang out with, when he's not so shy and overwhelmed. Being overcharged doesn't help either."
"That is concerning." Asgore rumbled in agreement. "Though I do think your companionship would do him some good. You have a talent for others."
He shrugged. "That's what I'm hoping for. I don't see anyone else really helping him, and I've been there."
"That's not something I had known about you."
"Eh, I was a really shy babybones."
The pause in the conversation stretched out over the course of a minute, both just sitting there, Asgore's hulking figure dwarfing Sans's.
Then the king sighed.
"Asriel.. told me about these.. Resets. And.. Frisk."
Sans tensed, looking away. "Yeah? What about it?"
"What he unintentionally forced upon you."
Sans felt himself stiffen entirely, staring at the lower slopes of the mountain between his slippers. Asgore continued a bit more hesitantly.
"Are you alright?"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Please. I need to know."
"Trust me, you don't. Nor am I ready to think about it."
"Are you hurt?"
He cut himself off before he said something he was going to regret, sighing.
"I'm not. I'm perfectly fine in that regard. I just.. Frisk didn't deserve this. Any of it. They were so Determined to save everyone, they only even Reset because they were looking for the best possible.. ending, I guess, and I didn't mind. But then they started Resetting closer and closer to when the Barrier was broken, and their- his- eyes, they looked red? Then… he started killing monsters. It was so sudden, but I could feel the dust on him, and it felt wrong. And then, one Reset, he said in a voice that wasn't his to call him Chara, and I…"
His shoulders dropped, even as Asgore tensed.
"I don't know… Chara started killing more and more monsters, toying around and sometimes playing pacifist before suddenly they just.. started hunting down every last monster. They committed a Genocide on monsterkind, and I.. didn't. Have. A choice. I was so angry that first time they killed everyone, but I still didn't want to do anything- I- I promised Toriel not to hurt the human, and I just couldn't stop thinking about Frisk… God..damn.. it."
A sob escaped him. "I killed Chara over and over again. And I felt so damn vindictive about it at first, but then they started killing everyone non-stop, over and over and over and over again, just because they liked to fight me, they liked to watch me beg them to stop- fuck, it went on for so long until they just suddenly went back to saving everyone again, and I just.. died inside. They would save us all, then turn around and kill us all again, over and over I watched them cut off Papyrus's skull and step on it when his arms were open, I watched them kill Undyne, and wait for her to refuse to die, just to cut her down for good, I watched Alphys jump into the pit so many times, and I.. I… I thought I was the only one who remembered."
Asgore hesitantly put one of his arms around the small skeleton, who just groaned, wiping his sockets repeatedly.
"You never remembered, Paps never remembered, Toriel didn't remember, Undyne didn't, no one but just me and.. just me. I was gonna fucking snap. I didn't know what to do. What are you supposed to do? I wanted to find some way to make them stop, but I didn't have anything. I started getting some.. some really dark ideas. I was scaring myself. I.. I was thinking that maybe.. if I…. Or if I snuck and stole the Souls, I could do something, but I knew they'd just cut me down anyway."
He sighed, jamming his hands in his pockets.
"Then out of nowhere, Napstablook shows up, and he's.. the entire time, all that time, he remembered. Before, I never even knew him much, he was so quiet and reserved, but a damn nice guy- but he'd remembered too and just.. never did anything. He was just as scared, he just fell in the loop and figured out that I remembered too and just never did anything! The only reason he showed up.. I'm not even sure. He was just as sick of it too, and I guess I was really damn desperate, because I offered we work together. I couldn't stop Chara, they would just kill me. They would inevitably kill me, but Naps? He's a ghost. You can't kill a ghost, not unless they wanna die."
He grinned wildly, but it was more of a grimace.
"And he agreed! It was weird at first when we met up, because I thought he was gonna just float in front of me invisibly or something, but he was a genius. With him on me, I can do anything and Chara can't do a damn thing. It's complete invulnerability! It was.. amazing. You couldn't imagine how safe I felt."
Sans giggled, somewhat hysterically, before he abruptly returned to earth, remembering where- and when- he was.
"I've said too much."
There was a pause, then Asgore slowly enveloped him in a very large, fluffy hug.
"I believe you've said enough."
"No, no, you can't be upset at them." Sans explained, concerned.
"Enough has been done, they were suffering too. I just didn't know until the last moment."
"I was not going to bring it up. These are clearly wounds that need healing before anyone tries to pry into them. For all three.. four of you. You've lived lifetimes of isolated suffering without anyone to go to. That is my concern. I do not need to know so soon, only that you will not be dying, my friend." Asgore explained gently.
"Thanks." Sans mumbled weakly, before recalling something.
"Don't tell Paps, okay? I.. he doesn't need to deal with this."
"I won't tell a Soul that doesn't already know."
"... Alright."
Sans sat up, drying his face in embarrassment.
"Where is he, anyway? Woke up out here with him, but looking back, he's not over there anymore."
"Oh, I believe he went to the mountaintop to see the sunrise with Undyne and Alphys. The two had camped there for the night."
"That's romantic." Sans muttered as he stood up.
He started off towards the cave, then paused.
"I'm looking for Nappy, by the way." He said over his shoulder, then proceeded down into the darkness, scuffing the packed dirt and rock. He glanced back to see Asgore watching him leave, then the king went out of sight as he turned into the open hall leading to the castle.
It didn't take him long to find Napstablook, the ghost barely visible as he lay on the ground in the corner, surrounded by a pool of his own whitish tears.
"Are you okay?" He asked softly, sitting beside the dangerous fluid.
"𝙸'𝚖 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚞𝚙 𝚝𝚘 𝚒𝚝.. 𝚜𝚘𝚛𝚛𝚢…" The sentence sounded somewhat rehearsed compared to most of the rest of his speech. Sans chuckled, recognizing the ingrained words.
"Honestly, me too." He admitted, leaning against the wall.
"You having a bad time?"
After a moment, Napstablook replied.
"𝚈𝚎𝚊𝚑, 𝙸 𝚐𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚜.." He shifted to peer at Sans.
"𝙲𝚊𝚗 𝙸 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚖𝚞𝚜𝚒𝚌 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔..?"
Sans studied him for a moment, then brought out the player and headphones, plugging them in and putting them on himself, offering the tape to the ghost.
"You wanna pick?"
Napstablook stared back, considering the mute offer before he floated upright, quietly taking the device and selecting a track, sinking into the skeleton as the music began to play. Sans sighed, leaning back and thinking.
He just enjoyed the tunes for a minute, then sat back up.
"I'm going to Grilby's. Want anything?"
Something zapped near his slippers before the other responded.
"𝙽𝚘𝚝 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢.."
"That sounds like you want ketchup."
".. 𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝?"
"I think you won't mind a good bottle of fresh ketchup."
"𝙸.. 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗…"
"Nah, you could use some good restaurant-style ketchup. Grilbs has got the best around."
"𝙱𝚞𝚝.. 𝚒𝚝'𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚐𝚑𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚏𝚘𝚘𝚍…"
"Why not try it anyway?"
Napstablook went silent, and Sans grew concerned.
"Hey, I didn't mean to make you feel bad, I was just playing around a little. He does have phantasmic too, you know."
The ghost lightened up, electricity fizzing.
"𝙷𝚎 𝚍𝚘𝚎𝚜?"
"Why wouldn't he? His bar's the best cold side of the Underground, and in my opinion, a heck of a lot better than the stuff Mettaton has."
He was walking as Napstablook spoke.
"𝙸 𝚍𝚒𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚘𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝.. 𝚒𝚗 𝚙𝚞𝚋𝚕𝚒𝚌 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚎𝚜…"
Sans shrugged. "Well, he's a fire elemental. Phantasmic's in their diet. That, and I've seen plenty of ghosts enjoying his mac an' cheese. He's got this almost regular customer, Herdanook, and he's living somewhere all the way in the capital with a family. Real popular."
"𝙾𝚑."
He was already walking around the corner from the diner, having teleported there. Napstablook splitting to hover beside him, smiling faintly as he glanced around.
Then he opened the door, letting the ghost duck behind him as the surprisingly large and boisterous crowd cheered his arrival.
"Heya! Are y'all having a party without me? What happened here?"
"Barrier's broken!"
"You weren't here!"
"The human saved us!"
Three different voices called out before being drowned amid the rest, all explaining the same thing.
Sans held the door open for the very anxious Napstablook before continuing.
"Well, it's a good thing I'm here now, right? It's never a real party without my expertise!"
Cheers rewarded him for that one.
Sans grinned.
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