Emerald

I'll never be the girl who lives life without fear
The fear to fail, the fear to live
It's what keeps me here- The Lane Gang

Present Day

Peter, Paul, and Mary... what is that noise? I swat my hand through the air hoping to make whatever it is STOP. My head is pounding, and I can still taste last night's tequila. There is no freaking way, it's time to get up. I have two classes today and I can get through those hung over, as long as I get at least 6 hours of sleep.

There it is again. Wait, is that my phone? Where did I leave it?

My sleeping hand awkwardly assaults the night stand, looking for any kind of light and in the process knocks over everything it touches.

I manage to find the clock and squint to try and make it focus, 4:14. I've only been asleep for an hour.

My tongue feels swollen, like it weighs a ton. I cannot possibly carry on a coherent conversation with who ever is calling.

*SCORE*...found it. Closing one eye, I aim for the phone in the middle. One missed call and a text from Grayson:

Gray: Did you watch us last night?

They were in CA on "The Tonight Show" last night. Oh crap, I hope no one messed with the DVR.

Em: DVR'd it. Had a gig last night. Gonna watch it later. How was it?

Gray: Great! I mentioned you.

Em: What? You did not!

Gray: Yeah I did. You'll see. You forgot to text me that you made it home safe!

Em: Sorry, too much tequila

Gray: Em, don't tell me that shit. You know I worry. Calliope with you?

Em: Of course. Don't worry. I am a big girl now :)

Gray: Yeah, whatev! Stay out of trouble. Night, Little-bit.

Em: Night "Dad"

Going back to sleep would be nice, but with Callie snoring like a hibernating bear, that's not happening soon.

I grab my iPod, put my ear buds in, and scroll to my Dark Rain playlist. I select shuffle, and close my eyes.

Some of the songs are really too heavy for sleeping, but when I am missing Grayson, it's the one thing that helps me feel closer to him. He and Jasper write most of their songs. It's easy to pretend Gray is speaking to me, through River's voice of course.

River Rain is the lead singer, and he has the sexiest voice I have ever heard! My dream goal would be to collaborate with River someday, beyond the practices where we goof off and sing together. I mean a real, ready for radio, song. God, I know we could record an amazeballs rock/country duet that would smash the charts. Of course, Daddy Gray would have to grant permission. None of the guys in the band, except Jasper, will come near me with a 10-foot pole, unless they are trying to irritate Gray.

It feels like it has only been about 5 minutes when the alarm starts blaring. I don't hear it, thanks to my ear buds. When suddenly a missile, or a shoe, yeah probably a shoe, happens to hit me in the head. THUNK. I yank my ear buds out and rub my head. "Ouch, Dangit Cal, that's going to leave a mark!"

"Wake up, Heifer!" Calliope's voice is raspier than usual. Probably from the cigarettes she started stealing from everyone in the bar last night, after her 4th shot of tequila.

Calliope Masterson, or Callie as most people call her, has been my roommate and BFF since freshman year. The day we met, we had a sort of alpha female peeing contest. She asked me a question, I gave her a dirty look, she called me a female dog (not her exact words) ...and Voila, instant best friends.

Callie is loud, obnoxious, and the most fun person I have ever had the pleasure of calling my friend. We are so much alike sometimes it's scary.

When it comes to looks though, we are polar opposites. I am only 5"6', with blonde hair and green eyes. Callie is at least 5'10", with shoulder length ebony hair, amber eyes, and lots of curves. Men adore her, and she goes through them like, well let's just say she could be in the same support group as Tiger Woods.

She has "Daddy issues," but I don't judge. I have my own dating drama, or lack thereof to deal with. I rarely date at all, thanks to my "trust issues."

Anyway, freshman year Callie and I started a band together, The Lane Gang. When we aren't in class, we spend most of our time practicing, writing, or playing local bars. We get paid to have fun, and do what we love. What more could a girl ask for?

"I am going to get a quick shower. Hurry your drunken butt up, or were going to be late." Callie barks.

Jumping out of bed, as fast as my hangover will allow, I scramble to find clean clothes. Laundry day can't come soon enough. I still smell like smoke and stale beer from last night, Yuck.

I grab my shower bag, some clothes that will pass for clean, and scurry off after Callie.

The warm water washes last night away, as my mind wanders. Here I am, a month from graduation, and I still have no idea what I want to do with my life.

When I graduate, I will have an M.Mus (Master of Music) degree. I've considered finding a job teaching. However, our band has a huge local following that could grow if we were able to take it out on the road. With the entire band graduating this year, that is finally a possibility. Should I risk it all to travel and sing, or grow some roots and teach? Either way, I need to decide soon.

Thankfully, I won't be stuck with tons of debt after college. I was lucky enough to get a full scholarship. Callie has a car, and we are always together, so I have no problem getting around. I buy most of my clothes from thrift stores, or clearance racks. I eat at the cafeteria for free when I can, or go in halvsies with Cal or my band mates for dinner. Anything else I need I can cover with the money I make playing with the band.

I have tried to explain this to Grayson, but he refuses to listen. Since he went on the road full time, he sends money once a month. At first, I didn't cash the checks. In true Grayson fashion he came up with a way around that. He opened a bank account in my name, sent me a debit card, and threatened me within an inch of my life if I didn't use it.

Knowing how persistent he can be, I devised a way to keep him happy. I transfer the money into a savings account, and let it collect interest. It currently amounts to over $50K. Grayson hasn't caught on and thinks I am spending his money. Everyone is happy.

In the last 4 years I have only had to use a few grand here and there, but I eventually replaced it. I am aware that Gray has more money than he could probably ever spend in his lifetime, but he takes care of everyone. The last thing I want is to be a burden to him.

Two years ago I promised myself that when I turned 18 I would live my own life and not depend on anyone. One day I am going to give him back every dime, even if I have to threaten him within an inch of his life.

I turn off the shower, and step out to get dressed. Today is going to be a long, but fun day, two classes, band practice, and tonight, a date with Zane.

Thinking about seeing Zane puts an easy smile on my face. We have only been on a few dates, but he is the first guy I have considered "more" with in a long time.

Once dry, I slip on my panties and jeans, grab my t-shirt, and look around for my bra. Well crap, I must have dropped it or forgotten it in my haste. The only option is to throw on my t-shirt and make a run for it  back to my room.

Praying there won't be any lurkers, I peek out into the hall. My shirt is clinging to my still damp body and my nipples are very much on display. The coast looks clear so I use my shower bag and dirty clothes as a makeshift shield and head out.

One more corner to turn and I'm home free. Looks like no such luck today. As soon as I enter the final hallway to my room, there he is.  Leaning against the wall in all of his utter creepiness, the one person I would walk a mile to avoid, Jeremiah.

I won't be able to dodge him. He is in this dorm, at this time of day because his stalking knows no bounds.

Have you ever seen or been around someone and you instantly get that feeling? The best way to describe it is with a show I watched on The Science Channel.

These people had an infestation of roaches in their home. Hundreds, maybe even thousands of them scurrying up the walls of their home. Roaches were in their food, their shower, and even crawled on them while they slept. Can you imagine one scurrying up your arm while you ate, or slept? EWWWW!

Yeah, that's the feeling I get from Jeremiah. My whole body shudders, and I suddenly feel the urge to shower again.

Jeremiah is tall, over 6 feet, but he is abnormally thin, with skin that appears to have never seen the sun. His greasy brown, dyed black hair, hangs in his face most of the time, hiding his serpent-like eyes.

I have been turning him down for years, but he never takes NO for an answer. At first I was nice about it. I tried to explain to him that with school and my band I didn't have time to date. I hate to hurt anyone's feelings, but he kept on and on, becoming more aggressive. Lately, I have been flat-out rude with my refusals. He still doesn't care.

Last time Gray was in town he let Jeremiah know to "back off or he would get hurt." It worked, and I didn't have to deal with him for almost a whole semester. Apparently since Gray hasn't been around for over a year, Jeremiah doesn't think he needs to keep his distance any longer.

He has been popping up everywhere I go, invading my personal space. I am pretty sure he is following me, but I haven't told Callie or Grayson. They would flip.

I am two feet away from the safety of my room when he steps into my space. "You're looking inviting today Emerald" he hisses.

He's eyeballing my breasts like they are the last doughnut in the dozen, and his inner fat boy is starving.

I adjust my arms to make sure he doesn't see my girls.
The urge to gag is strong, as I snap at him, "You're not invited to look, Jeremiah."

He inches even closer. I try to push past him, but I underestimate the length of his scrawny limbs. His arms extend out, caging me against the wall. He leans in closer and closer, and...Oh God, his breath is rancid.

He's an inch from my nose when he warns, "Your smart mouth is going to get you in trouble someday little girl."

Little girl? Oh, it's on. I scoot my right leg over and line it up with his crotch. This is a move I have perfected over the years, thanks to my self-defense classes. He will be having his balls for breakfast!

I am about to knee him with everything I have, when out of the corner of my eye, I see Calliope barreling towards us.

"Hey, Asshat! Do you have a death wish?" she booms.

Jeremiah steps back and shoots daggers at Callie through his squinted eyes. "Stay out of it, Cow!" He spews.

"Oh, he did not just call me a Cow. Excuse me, did he just call me a Cow?!!!" She turns her head dramatically from side to side like she is looking for someone to answer her. Then she yells for all to hear, "Look here Jafar, you better keep moooovin' before my big cow ass drop kicks you from here back to Agrabah."

His almost non-existent lips disappear as he snarls at us before stomping away.

I can't hold it in. My body slides down the wall, and I double over with laughter. My side's burn and tears are pouring from my eyes. "Oh God Cal, I'm gonna pee." Crossing my legs and trying to catch my breath, I snort.

Callie joins in with her own hysterics, and I laugh even harder. "Did you see the look on his face when you called him Jafar?" I ask, gasping for breath. "Oh my Gosh, now he knows our nickname for him. I wish I could have recorded the look on his face."

Callie straightens and wipes the tears from her eyes. She turns to me and all signs of laughter are gone. "Em, you seriously need to watch out for him. Don't let him corner you like that again. That boy is fifty shades of cray."

I shrug my shoulder and play it off like it is no big deal. "I know, I was in a hurry and wasn't expecting to run into anyone. I'll be more careful, I promise." She nods slightly and I know this conversation isn't over by far. "Let me grab a bra from the room and then we can head to class."

"Grab a bra? What the...???? Hurry, Heifer."