I guess this is an Alice In Wonderland AU. 

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"CAAAAATTT!!!!!", Will shrieked, quickly popping into his mouse form. From the way he was scurrying about, anyone could tell that he was panicked. After a few seconds of his mousy squeaking and scurrying all over the table, Will found a hiding place under Dipper's top hat. 

The top hat was raven black, and there was a blue, silk ribbon wrapping all around it. Embroidered in the front of the hat was a blue pinetree.

It was one of Dipper's finest hats, but he didn't mind that Will decided to make a hiding place out of it. He would've run and hid, too, if it weren't for his dignity and the other people at the table.

"Well, well, well, well, well, well, well", the "Cheshire Cat" said, drawing out the last well.

"Hello Bill", Dipper greeted with clenched teeth.

At the name "Bill", a variety of squeaks could be heard under Dipper's hat.

"I see you have taken my weak counterpart as apart of your insane group." Bill drawled out, grinning.

Dipper had always found that grin annoying, and now was no different.

With small fit of laughter, Dipper said "Oh, you'll fit RIGHT in with us." 

At this, Bill's eyes flashed, but his grin didn't falter for a second.

"I'm nuts, but I'm not as mad as you, Hatter." Bill replied smoothly.

Everyone at the table had kept silent through Cat and Hatter's "small talk". They trusted Dipper enough to take care of himself.

Mabel was itching to throw a teacup at Bill, since it was her nature, but she new it wouldn't help the situation.

The other people at the table, Candy and Grenda, were looking at the conversation going on nutruelly. 

"So," Dipper said, " What brings you here, Cat?" 

After a moment of silence, Bill responded "Well, I just heard from a little bunny friend that the Queen ordered her guardsmen to come down here and, uh, ask you some questions."

Dipper's eyes narrowed, while everyone else went into a frenzy. The females were blabbering a mile a minute, while Will made loud squeaking noises.

"Everyone, calm down!" Dipper barked, and immediatly eveyone shut up.

Just as Dipper was going to say something more, marching was heard in the distance.

"It was very nice talking to you freaks, but I gotta go now. Bye bye!" Bill said before disappearing.

'We need to plan something', Dipper thought. When he got an idea, he coaxed Will out under the hat and briefly explained.

With the words "Act unbearably insane", Will went from person to person and explained to them.

Mabel's rabbit ear twitched, and any other person would have thought she had a mentally unstable mind, but Dipper knew she was just nervous.

When Will converted back to his human looking form, (as human as he could look with blue hair, mose ears, and whiskers) the guardsmen sounded closer. He sat down, and pretended that he was asleep.

Everyone else pretended that they didn't hear anything and went on with their buisness. 

After what seemed like hours of waiting, the guardsmen finally arrived.

"Oh hello, guardsmen, I din't see you there!"Dipper exclaimed.

"What?" Will fake yawned, and continued "I thought that there was rain coming. Not horses."

"Ooooh, raining horses! How exciting!" Mabel said cheerfully.

"Mr.Hatter. Ms. Rabbit. Mr. Mouse. Ms.Bird. Ms. Hare." the one if the guardsmen politely greeted.

"We have come here today to ask you a few questions." another guardsmen said.

"QUESTIONS! WHAT KING OF QUESTIONS?" Grenda chirped loudly, feather's ruffling.

"Ooh, what if it's bout our tea?"

"Or our wonderful hats!"

"What about our songs?"

At the word 'songs' the whole group burst into a chorus of horrible singing.

"Twinkle Twinkle little bat, now I know that's where you're-"

 A third guardsmen cleared his throat.

"Enough." he said.

"At", Candy finished the song.

The group burst into wild laughter, laughing their insane laughs.

"Oh, I'm dearly sorry, what were we talking about?" Dipper asked, wiping a tear from his eye.

"We were talking about questioning.", the first guardsmen said through clenched teeth, clearly annoyed.

"Yes yes yes, the questions." Dipper said in faux curiosity.

"We were wondering if you knew a girl name Alice." the second guardsmen asked.

"Alice?" Will asked, genuinely curious.

"I know of an Elise, but I don't know an Alice." Mabel said. "Awww, Elise, such a beauty." 

"I don't know anything of anything of an Alice, but I know of a Pacifica!" Dipper said.

"That doesn't even relate to what we are discussing ." the third guardsmen said.

"Eh, whatever."

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Eyyyyy I finished this! Well, sorta. 

EDIT: LMAO WHY ARE THEY OUT-OF CHARACTER YOUNGER SELF....WHY?!