from the moment that the sound of your footsteps got fainter,
from the moment i couldn't hear you humming

and the time you chuckled nervously,
you brushed it off as a habit

from that moment i knew,
never again would i see you

i tried to tell myself,
that i assumed wrong

but i sunk too deep,
so i had to drown

all the signs were there,
but i didn't want to believe them

for years i lived in fear,
fear that the day might be tomorrow

but perhaps it was that hope,
that kept me on the surface

it took years for that day to come,
the day i sank to the bottom

the day you gave me a faint smile,
i couldn't tell if you regretted it

so i thought why?
why did it hurt if i knew it was bound to happen?

and while in the midst of self pity,
another chance was sent to me

and i pondered,
did i deserve it?

and i got my answer,
it was never my fault

but i was too late,
the question took too long to answer

my sorrow was the water,
and i had already drowned

now all that was left,
was being six feet under the dirt

being extracted from the water,
but never again was i dry

i was stained by you,
the water remained on my body

never again was i dry,
never again did i see you

betrayal/self pity