47.

"Have a seat." Vir's voice was cold and unrelenting as he pointed to the chair in front of his desk, as he took place on the other side. Vir asked me to come with him after our meeting, without giving a reason. He just stalked out and had me trail behind him like some sort of lost puppy.

I had a feeling what this was about, but for his safety and my own, I had to assume he knew nothing at all. If he did, he was going to have to tell me exactly what he had found out in the half hour we were in the conference room, eating lunch together.

So I sat down, one leg crossed over the other, my hands tensely on top of my knee as I leaned back.

Vir was sitting calmly in his own chair, the fiddling of his fingers the only sign of his anxiety. He simply stared at me in silence, probably waiting for me to start talking.

I stared ahead of myself stubbornly.

"I'm waiting, Livia."

I raised my eyebrows boldly. "For what, Vir? You asked me here?"

Something in his eyes tightened, a muscle near his jaw contracting as his anger grew. "Don't play dumb, Livia. I know you're not actually stupid. You are hiding something, and you are feeling guilty about it. You have been nervous since you walked into the office this morning, and I could practically feel your heart rate skyrocket when Willow talked about treason. Something happened that you are not telling me, and I demand to hear what it is, now."

The only thing I could feel was immense relief as soon as he was done talking. He didn't actually know anything just yet.

"Nothing serious is going on Vir, everything is fine." Trying to come across confident, I smiled at him warmly. "Just a bit nervous about not actually being incredibly smart, which might be considered treason."

Stick to the truth as closely as you can right? Part of the reason why that asshole Montgomery got a chance to blackmail me was due to me cheating in an intelligence competition, pretending to be more book-smart than I would ever be. He saw right through me from the start, like Vir had, and it was only a matter of time before someone else noticed. Now that I got my task of auditing companies in Sapientiae, the chances both increased and decreased simultaneously, as I had a function I could execute well, but had to speak to more people for.

"I may be a tad socially inept and I know we aren't actually as close as most soulmates, but I do know you better than you might think, Livia. Your nervousness about treason was one thing, but you almost jumped out of your skin when Betty spoke about the companies you visited. I know something's up, and you feel stressed and guilty about it. Did something happen there?" He kept studying me thoughtfully, his arms crossed in front of his chest.

I just shook my head, but I felt my confidence waning. It seemed like Vir was not going to let this go. "It's nothing Vir, really. I will get over it." I started getting up as a sign that I was done with this conversation – or interrogation, as rightful as it may have been.

"Unless..." I turned around and saw how Vir's eyes suddenly went large, pupils dilating and an expression of hurt quickly flashed over his face. "Unless it's... me? We haven't really spoken about what h-happened, y-you know. A-are y-you uncomf-fortable w-with me after th-the... uhm... k-k-kiss?" Whereas earlier he was coiled tightly like a spring, he now looked almost defeated, his hands laying weakly in his lap.

I felt my heart go out to him. "No!" My feet had already moved halfway around the desk on my way to comfort my soulmate when I realised I practically screamed. "No," I repeated, this time softer. "If there is anything in my life that I don't regret, it's that, Vir, I promise." My hand floated in the air, a few centimetres above his shoulder. In a slightly unexpected speed, he grasped my hand in his, the warmth from his skin slowly seeping into mine. With a deep intensity, he gazed into my eyes, practically begging for an answer beyond what I could give him. "Then what is it? Is it something I did?"

I shook my head. "No, Vir, trust me, you did nothing wrong."

"Then, did something happen at one of the companies you visited?"

I kept silent, stubbornly refusing to answer as I again shook my head.

"Why don't you want to tell me? I can help you if you made a mistake, Livia, but I can't if I don't know. Don't you trust me?" He stood up and pulled me closer to him as he said the last few words. My eyes burned as they filled with a thin layer of tears. Standing so close to him he almost dwarfed me, his agitated breath fanning my face every so often.

Before I knew it, I was standing on the tip of my toes, pushing my lips against his. Unlike the previous kiss we shared, this one was raw and angry, messy and fast. Teeth clashing, tongues touching, my hands shaken loose from his hold, instead gripping the curls on the back of his head, pulling him closer than physically possible.

And yet, even with all that anger – which he reciprocated eagerly – it felt heavenly, and I couldn't bring myself to stop. Vir, fitting his arms around my body as if he was scared I would run, felt a lot less tentative than a few days ago, instead restricting my movement and pulling me flush against him. Even though he was clearly inexperienced, he met the expectations of the Alpha of Intelligence – he was an incredibly fast learner. Within seemingly no time at all, I was the one to break our kiss for fear I would faint. Both of us breathing heavily, the anger seemed to seep away, leaving different emotions in its wake. Pure desperation laced with a hint of acceptance.

Vir said nothing at first, just savouring the feel of our skin touching together, both of us trying to catch our breath. Then, soft like a whisper, came his plea. "I beg you, Livia, please let me help?"

As I gazed into his eyes, I saw nothing but concern. Maybe that is what broke me, in the end. Standing chest to chest with your soulmate – or face to neck, in our case – I was surrounded by his alluring scent, lulling me into a perhaps false sense of security. So close to him, I simply felt safe, especially as he so tenderly held my hand to his heart.

"I-I want to tell you," I then said softly, willing him by pure force of thought to understand, or to drop it. "I just... can't. Please don't make me say it Vir." I looked down to my shoes, and whispered the last few words so softly I doubted he could hear me. "They will know."