God You're Gorgeous

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Here's the Spotify Link, y'all, it's not something Lily listens to but I thought it just fit.

https://open.spotify.com/track/6Hd8mrDwBQ8rLo70FwFG5C?si=pxgCD9sJRACSCoTKzwcVtw

You know what to do- copy it, paste it in the google search bar and you got yourselves one hell of a song. It would probably be easier if I told you what song it is, but I won't. :)

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Lily's POV

I sat, eating chocolate ice-cream, in front of my TV watching The Kissing Booth. Probably not the best choice, but hey, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. So I was lonely, oh so alone, during what was supposed to be my date but due to Romeo I cancelled it because 'I wasn't feeling great'. It wasn't a lie, that I told Benjamin, I just didn't tell him what type of hole in my stomach I had.

When Romeo left, he walked away from everything. Everything we had. It's funny how strongly you can feel for someone after barely a week. 

That's how strong we were.

And yet he walked away from it all like it was nothing. Like I was nothing. I'd been feeling like chopped liver lately, having two boys leave my life in the span of a week. Am I not good enough? Am I not good enough, even, for a scummy fuck-boy? And if I'm not? Then what am I then? Will I end up married to some jerky redneck who takes me for granted and stuffs me full of babies but doesn't want them unless they're boys? 

Okay, slow down there.

But if I'm not even enough for a guy who has had more one night stands than days I've lived, then what am I to anybody? 

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I sat in 3rd period, a certain boy behind me that I'm trying to ignore. Thank god he made it easy. It seems he was back to his old self; flirting with girls, ignoring the teacher, and all the guys are giving him salty glares. Jealous frauds, that's what they are. 

"Mrs Harrington! If you could stop floating to La La Land and focus on the discussion, that'd be really great!" Ms Sanders looked at me and I nodded, giving her a polite nod in apology. She nodded back and continued talking about Maya Angelou. 

I loved Maya Angelou, I do, it's just emotions are so much stronger than I'd thought they'd be. I mean I've read about it, but I've never believed I would feel it. I thought that my magical dream would never come true. Until now. Until he took my heart and ran away with it, breaking it in the process. 

And I've never loved it so much. 

That's the thing, I guess. You just can't choose who you love. 

I was at my locker when Benjamin approached me. "Lilian, are you alright?" He asked, genuinely worried. Now if Romeo was in his place he probably would've just sat at home with me last night and nurse me back to health because 'a day without you is a day wasted'. (Author: I should quote that XD) 

But why am I thinking about Romeo? "Um, yeah, I guess I was just in some sort of funk. Do you want to go tonight instead?" Benjamin nodded. "Sure. Why not?" I smiled and walked to my next period. 

That night, I was sitting across from the sweetest guy ever, in an ice-cream shop. "So, like, I don't mean to go all grade school on you but like what's your favorite color?" I giggled. "Um, yeah, it's probably yellow. I love yellow. My favorite outfit is this big fluffy yellow sweater that goes good with these shorts I have and of course my yellow converse." I stuck my shoe out side of the table so it was in the isle. He laughed. "I have to say, mines probably purple." I laughed. "Don't judge me! Think of me as the new Prince, instead." This caused me to roll into another fit of laughter. "Sure thing!" 

When I finally opened my eyes after my laughing fit, I found him staring at me, smiling. A light pink blush dusted his cheeks. "Lilian," he started, grabbing my hands with his. "I think you're beautiful, and I love this time we've spent together. Do you want to try this new burger joint down the street with me? Maybe Friday?" I nodded. "Sure! I would love to!" He seemed like a nice guy, the exact opposite of Romeo and now I'm thanking god I broke up with Ethan- this date is going great! 

"So, Lilian," he said, trying and failing to hide his blush. "I like you a lot." He said finally. "And um," he started, biting his lip. "I was wondering, just out of curiosity," he stated again. He looked up at me and it seemed his nerves just got worse at my confused but pointed look. "Why did you ever start hanging out with Romeo?" He asked, looking away from me. I let out a faint giggle. I was really hoping he wouldn't bring him up. "Well, er," I looked away as well. "The truth is... It's well, complicated, you see." He looked at me with his piercing blue eyes finally and nodded. "If you want me to tell you honestly, you have to promise not to run away." I said. He nodded, giving me a curious, worried look. 

"Lilian, I promise you I won't leave if it's not for a good reason. I know what type of person Romeo is. And... well I know how persuasive he can be as well." I gave him a conflicted look. "Listen, Lilian..." He sighed and rubbed his temple. "Just tell me, please. It's been itching at me ever since you first started talking to me. It's better to get things off of your chest than to sit there, bottle it up and let it eat you up." I nodded, and drew a deep breath in. 

"He blackmailed me." I said honestly. 

"My boyfriend- well now ex boyfriend- Ethan cheated on me at a party and I saw him do it. I was so distraught and angry and depressed I drank all my insecurities away. I got... wasted, and apparently I hooked up with Romeo and lost my V-card. He wanted to... hang out with me, that's what he said, and said if I didn't he would tell the whole school and Ethan that I lost my innocence to some fuckboy like himself." I took another breath in. 

"I accepted his offer and I'd like to think we bonded a lot over those few days. He's not who everyone thinks he is. So, one fateful night, we were studying in my room when... it all happened so fast..." I stopped, but was too nervous to look up and gauge his reaction. 

"In short, it ended up... with me having sex with him. I called him a monster and all these mean things. Then he just left my bedroom. Later that day he said he was sorry and then he said he wouldn't go through with the deal anymore. He wouldn't blackmail me and he wouldn't hang out with me anymore. I don't know what in him changed. But ever since then he's been acting like I don't even exist, like he forgot all that we have-" 

"Lily stop." Benjamin looked at me. "You better be thanking god this place is packed and nobody can hear a word you're saying." He said, after a little bit. "And, Lilian, I'm sorry but it seems he's in love with you and you're in love with him. I am so sorry." He said honestly, guilt and some other emotion I couldn't read packed away in his eyes. "It'd be wrong and unfair of you to date someone while you're in love with someone else I truly am sorry Lilian. I really am." He said. "I thank you for this truly wonderful date, but it's just better for everyone if I leave." He smiled at me one last time before he paid the waiter and left. I just watched his retreating figure, my mouth gaping. 

"Close your mouth there, sweetheart." 

I looked over and found the guy in question playing with a napkin in the booth across from me. 

"R-Romeo?" I asked incredulously, wondering if it was just my imagination. "Some wrong number texted me and said to come here." He said out of nowhere. "I thought it was- you know what, never mind, but I did not expect to see you alone in a booth, babygirl. So I did the only thing rational and sat next to you." 

I just stared at him. "You're gonna catch flies and then you'll choke and who's fault will that be? Mine so why don't you go stare at loverboy who just walked out, hmm?" He rushed out, besides the last part. "Why are you here? I thought you were avoiding me." I said bitterly to him. He smirked. "There you are, honey. I couldn't stay away from you for long, you're far too delectable, my sweet." He winked at me. I rolled my eyes and he flagged down a waiter to order a chocolate malt. "Don't tell me you didn't miss me, babygirl." He said after he finished his order. 

"Why would I have missed you?" I asked him, once again bitterly. "I'm Romeo Florence, sweet cheeks, I think anyone in your shoes would have missed me." He said cheekily. "And anyway, babygirl, you never met my friend like I asked you to, so I'm taking you somewhere to meet him." He thanked the waitress, who gave him his drink and puffed her chest out. He completely ignored her and turned to me. "How does that sound, Lily?" He called me Lily and it sent shivers up my spine. Delicious shivers. 

"What's your friend's name?" I asked skeptically. He laughed. "What do you think his name is? The Brick? No his name is Greyson but you just call him Grey. He's British so if you ever spell it, spell it with an 'e'." He said, taking a drink from his malt. I let out a tiny giggle, trying not to break out into a fit of laughter. He smiled genuinely at me and I felt my heart do somersaults. "Great. I'll pay for it sugar, and then we'll go. He's been wanting to meet you for a while so try not to judge him for being some type of fangirl, alright?" I nodded, not sure why I was agreeing to this. 

"Glad we made up, my love." He smiled at me, took my hand and led me out of the shop after paying. "What idiot takes a girl to an ice-cream shop on a first date?" Romeo scoffed once we were in his car. "I would've taken you to the zoo or something." He said. I stared at him, my cheeks going red. "Like the diner they have at the zoo?" He nodded. "Yeah I mean any moron would know you love animals, honey." He took a quick glance at me as he started the engine. "Don't look at me like that." I swore I saw his cheeks go a little dark, but it was probably the lighting. Oh well. 

We've been driving for a while and I was at the edge of sleep, my hair tousled from trying to find a good sleeping position, and my makeup slightly messed up. My eyelids drooped heavily and unattractively. I was about to fall asleep when Romeo said something to jolt me back awake. "God you're gorgeous." He said breathlessly, at what I noticed was a red light. I turned my head over to look at him. "What?" I heard his breath hitch. "Damn it. I thought you were asleep!" He exclaimed, suddenly shoving on the gas once he realized the light went green. "You think I'm pretty? Romeo, think of me in the parlor vs right now." I said incredulously. He shrugged. 

"I could barely look at you then. You're more gorgeous as you are, babygirl. If we ever go on a date, sorry when we go on a date, don't bother trying to pamper yourself because you look better with no makeup. Trust me, I've met a lot of girls in my time and not many could pull off the all natural look, babygirl." He said, still focusing on the road. I just stared at him. "Honestly?" 

He hit his hand on the wheel and pulled off the side of the road. "Um, Romeo, why'd you do t-that," I turned to look at him to see him already staring at me. "Lilian, why would someone like me keep running back to you?" He asked, his tone firm. "What?" I was so confused, so... so... I was kind of worried and scared. I felt a rush of adrenaline run through me. Something was happening. I could feel it. He looked away for a moment then looked straight back at me. 

"Lilian, why would someone like me, someone who meets women destined for the modeling industry and are literally serving themselves to him on a silver platter, keep running back to you?" I just stared at him. "I-I don't know." I stared at him right back, confused, intrigued and kind of scared. "Lilian Paris Harrington," he let out a breathless chuckle. I didn't even know it happened, barely, but his lips were up against mine and he was straddling me on my seat. 

"I'm not having sex with you!" I pushed him away from me. Hurt flashed across his beautiful eyes. "Is that really all you think of me?" His voice cracked. "Lily, this is what I've been trying to tell you for the past 10 minutes. I am in love with you and I hate it. I have women that will literally do anything just for me to give them a peck on the lips yet there's you-" he stopped and just stared at me. "You're so damn irresistible. I want to love someone who will love me just as easily as I have them, and, and," he stopped again and ran his hands through his dark hair. 

"And then there's you. You're like my forbidden fruit. My Goblet of fucking Fire, Lily." I wanted to say that's not what the Goblet of Fire was but I didn't have the heart to in the middle of his confession. 

"You're something I can't have but I want you in my arms, I want you in my bed, I want you to kiss me and mean it, I want you to love me, so bad, so bad..." he was hysterical. He kissed me again and it was soft and loving, not like when he had kissed me before. "I tried. I really did. I tried really hard to get over you these past few days, but nobody even compares to you. No one's even close. I literally walked out on some sex I was having, Lily. I'm fucking obsessed with you and I hate every second. I've never loved every second of supposed hatred than these last few days where I tried to convince myself that you meant everything you said about me being a monster. But the look in your eyes didn't mean it. And I hate it. Why can't you just hate me?" 

Tears pricked his eyes as he looked away. "I love you so damn much. So don't go telling me you don't think you're pretty," He said the last sentence bitterly. "Because you are in your mind, in your heart, in your soul and don't you dare go and ever think for a second that you aren't a blessing from the lord himself, alright, honey?" He said sternly and got back in his seat. He seemed to have sobered up in those few seconds. He got back in the drivers seat and buckled up his seat belt. He started driving and I was just left startled, bewildered and my heart was beating so fast. He just, he just, he just... I don't even know what he just did. But everything he said was perfect. It worked so well, and I just stared in front of me, dumbfounded and awed, until we arrived and he parked in a spot that was marked 'members only fools'. 

"We're here, babygirl." 

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Sorry y'all cliff hanger AND a long chapter. The song above is one of my fav songs. Hope y'all love it! 

Tell me your thoughts abt the chapter

abt the song

abt Romeo's confession

Toodles, 

Marceline