listened to the tortured poets department writing this so you might need therapy lol

Chapter Seventeen: Impossible Planet

♥✰♥

CLAUDIA EXPECTED TO OPEN HER EYES AND SEE LUCIFER IN FRONT OF HER.

Trapped in a small cage with two archangels plotting the torture of her soul for eternity.

She didn't expect to see Castiel.

"What?" She whispered, looking around the empty space her body seemed to exist in.

There was nothing as far as she could see. Empty space. A void of existence.

Nothing but her and Castiel.

"You can't do this," he walked towards her, footsteps echoing in the empty existence they stood in. "Claudia, I can't let you do this."

Confusion grew on her face, and she let him cup her cheek softly. "What do you mean?"

"Fight him."

—

Claudia awoke with a gasp, looking around with wide-eyes, searching for Castiel, for Lucifer, for Michael, for someone.

Her fear settled into relief when brown eyes caught hers.

"Claudia."

Trembling, she sank into his touch, letting him pull her to his chest, one hand gripping her hair, the other wrapped tightly around her waist.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, shaking against him.

His voice was soft, understanding, patient.

"It's alright," he calmed her quietly, tightening his grip on her. "You're safe, Claudia. You're alright."

Claudia didn't want to move. Didn't want to think about Castiel or Lucifer or the fact that one was protecting her from the other. Or the fact that she had trapped herself in a cage so like her brother's, but on the physical plane.

Castiel was strong, but he was no competition for Lucifer.

And Lucifer would toy with her, cradle her into safety before piercing her skin with viper fangs and drinking her dry. He would make the Doctor hold her lifeless body and laugh as she stood next to him, begging for the deal to be reversed.

But her voice had been clear, her intentions pure with only the love for her family in mind. Blood-stained hands washed clear of the pain would once again be covered in red, if only from tearing her heart out so it could beat for the people that would never understand why it stopped in the first place.

Her mind trailed to Lucifer; his sick satisfaction twisting a knife into her soul, mocking as the light left her eyes and retired it in place of a barren wasteland.

The Doctor's hands cupped her face, centering her. Tethering her back the ground under her legs. Guiding her soul back to her body, the pain in her limbs separating from the pain in her chest.

"What happened?" He asked softly, thumbs trailing over her cheeks.

"He'll take me," Claudia answered in a whisper, the realization flooding her and threatening to drown her in the suggestions behind it. "He can't hold him off."

She knew the confusion would hit him before the resolution, but she didn't expect him to understand. He'd fought her in place of standing beside her. Lucifer had split her in two and his horsemen took a swing at each limb, but he mistook her attackers for ghosts and couldn't see the salt burned into her skin.

Trying to unveil her truth but blinded behind rose-tinted glasses, hearts in eyes that beat in tandem with his. That wasn't Claudia. Her heart was shattered, torn into pieces by everyone who dared touch her skin.

And now the Doctor was holding her, clinging to her body with a calmness in his gaze that could only be assured by one so unaware of the noose around his neck.

She could tear it off, hang herself in place of him, but she couldn't bear to see the emptiness in his gaze as she swung before him.

"Who?" He asked softly. "Claudia, you have to talk to me."

But she knew he would deny it until he was blue in the face. The noose squeezed his throat before her hands could pull it free. He would dispute the truth that fell from his narrative and she would read the words from his grave. She would pull the teeth from his skull with the devil's hands over her own.

Claudia pulled away from him, standing and straightening her face. She ignored the wary looks from Rose and Danny, offering the Doctor a hand to stand up. She'd cut off her own limbs if it meant he could use them to take a step up — and that was the truth of it all.

The only people fighting for her were playing dress up with the devil, toy soldiers using wooden swords against a king who birthed armies through fire.

Claudia's steps faltered and she gripped the railing as a tremor shook the base, divulging everyone's attention from her mistake to the safety of the occupants within it. The Doctor caught Claudia, a gentle hand on her waist, and she thanked him with a quick smile.

"Emergency hull breach. Emergency hull breach."

"Which section?" Danny exclaimed, speaking hurriedly into his watch.

"Everyone, evacuate eleven to thirteen," Zack ordered over the comms. The Doctor grabbed Rose's hand, Claudia and Danny following quickly behind. "We've got a breach. The base is open. Repeat, the base is open!"

"Open door nineteen."

The four rushed into the room with the lettering and hurried into the corridor.

"Close door nineteen."

"I can't contain the oxygen field," Zack shouted over the comms. "We're going to lose it."

Jefferson held the door open for the group, urging them forward as they bolted past him, racing into a room free of the breach.

"Everyone all right?" The Doctor asked, looking around, eyes finding Claudia's. She nodded once.

"Breach sealed."

"What happened?" The Doctor asked, looking around. "What was it?"

"Hull breach," Jefferson explained. "We were open to the elements. Another couple of minutes and we'd have been inspecting that black hole at close quarters."

Claudia leaned over the railing, panting, hands trembling lightly. Her mind drifted back to the TARDIS, a longing in her heart she didn't think she could have. She missed her room, so like Bobby's home, and her heart sank at the thought of a man suffering to save her.

Another name to add to the list of people who had died for her. More blood on her hands, staining her limbs with red and professing their love with daggers in their chests. Her hand gripped the hilt, stabbing the victims down, Lucifer's cruel grin twisting her mouth into a smile.

But that was the fun with demons, wasn't it? They'd toy with the desperation of those wrought with the pain of experiencing love to its most coherent extent.

Claudia knew in Bobby's death, Sam's, her father's...

Love would always wound those who dared to wield it and there would be no winners except the monsters who tore out organs and feasted on the corruption that brought an end to the affair.

"That wasn't a quake," the Doctor's voice cut through her thoughts. "What caused it?"

"We've lost sections eleven to thirteen," Zack informed them. "Everyone all right?"

"We've got everyone here except Scooti," Jefferson spoke through the comms.

Claudia looked around for the young girl, a sinking feeling in her chest. Lucifer enjoyed the young ones, liked to watch them scream and beg for help. It's why he loved toying with her.

Scooti was a victim of Claudia's tormentor as much as she, and Claudia hoped with all of her heart that she hadn't ended up in bed with the beast too.

"Scooti, report," Jefferson asked over the comms.

Claudia shook her head minutely, face hardening. Scooti was dead. They'd all be dead.

If they had the TARIDS...

But they didn't.

"Scooti Manista, this is an order, report."

Lucifer entrapped them here and would toy with them like dolls in his hands. He would win.

A sharp pain in her chest caused her to bite back a gasp, and she bit her lip hard enough to make it bleed, disguising the pain as something else entirely. A flash of blue eyes and a blinding light temporarily disoriented her, but Claudia blinked both away.

Regret painted over her previous despondency, and she forced herself to focus on the matter at hand. She could apologize to Castiel later, apologize for the Grace being singed with the devil's wrath. But she had to get Rose and the Doctor out of here before she could let herself collapse.

"She's alright," Zack told them all. There were sighs of relief, but Claudia knew the ploy. Lucifer made the game and changed the rules just as they were reading the manual. They'd never make it to the end. "I've picked up her biochip. She's in Habitation 3. Better go check and see if she's not responding. She might be unconscious."

Zack continued a moment later, his tone lighter. "But how about that, eh?" He chuckled. "We survived."

For now.

Claudia straightened, eyes darting around for any sign of the devil in their midst. But it was quiet. He was observing them in shadows, tallying the marks of their dead with a whip, cracking it back and taking out anyone who got close enough.

"Habitation 3," Jefferson sighed. "Come on." He looked around and moved past the group to the next bulky door. "I don't often say this, but I think we could all do with a drink."

Claudia snorted. That was so very Dean of him.

Quickly stopping herself from tunneling at the thought of her older brother, who she would probably never see again, she watched Jefferson open the door for everyone.

The Doctor kneeled in front of Toby, who was trembling and shaking. Rose was at his side, both of them watching the man in concern.

"What happened?" The Doctor asked.

"I-I-I don't know," Toby supplied, looking between the two. "I was working and then I can't remember."

Damn it.

"Possession," Claudia sighed, kneeling in front of Toby. "Take this," she dug around in her pocket and pulled out a bracelet. An Enochian sigil engraved in a bracelet — a gift from Castiel after she'd first been possessed by Lucifer. "Wear this."

At Rose's scoff, Claudia sent her a glare, snapping at both occupants in the room who were fighting against her knowledge.

"Do not," she looked between them. "Believe it or don't, I don't care, but this is how he lives."

Toby looked down at it, then to her. "What's happening to me?" He asked softly, a victim like so many of her previous encounters on hunts. She'd protect him, too. An innocent like all the rest.

If it meant Lucifer would take her before he took Toby, she'd let him.

"It won't happen again," Claudia promised with a soft smile, "wear this. If he tempts you, and he will, come to me. I'll keep you safe. He wants me more."

Toby's eyes filled with a tearful relief. "You—you know about him?"

Claudia nodded, slipping the bracelet around his wrist and tightening the strap. "He comes for me, too, Toby. You're not his endgame. You'll be okay."

"Who are you talking about?" The Doctor asked, observing Claudia carefully.

Ignoring him, Claudia stood, offering Toby a hand up. He took it gratefully, the glint of the engraving catching the low light of the ship.

Rose and the Doctor stood too, exchanging a look that Claudia pretended not to notice. She couldn't handle their disbelief right now. There was too much at stake for pretentious idealizations and distorted viewpoints.

The group was scanning and hastily talking over one another as they entered the seating room. They couldn't find any sign of Scooti, and Claudia hung back against the wall, eyes catching on the Enochian painted over the metal.

Another pierce in her heart, and she reached a hand up, rubbing her chest softly. The dagger was sharp but the hands piercing it into her chest were her own.

The Doctor caught her eye, but she looked away, swallowing her pain and letting her hand drop. She couldn't get distracted with his questions or worries. He hovered and defended, and she couldn't let him get caught in the crossfire.

Not with Lucifer.

"Zack," Jefferson spoke into his comms device. "We've got a problem. No sign of Scooti."

"But it says Habitation 3," Zack argued.

"Well, that's where I am and I'm telling you, she's not here."

Claudia heard a twisted laugh in her mind, a mirthful vindication in victory of a battle so woefully unmatched.

He was laughing at them.

Claudia's eyes shot to the sky and immediately closed at the sight of a young woman drifting above them.

"I've found her," the Doctor spoke up solemnly.

Gasps echoed around the room, but Claudia's hands clenched into fists.

Exhaustion sank into her hands then, replacing the bitter fury in which she'd brandished her entire life. Instead of shooting bolts, her pistol was packing blanks. What play did she have? She'd offered herself but Castiel disagreed. The Grace protecting her wouldn't let her fall to save the people around her and there were no other weapons to flourish.

Lucifer was holding the deck, and her cards were disintegrating in the presence of his violence.

There were no moves left to play.

"Sorry," she heard the Doctor's voice next to her. "I'm so sorry."

Oh, if she wasn't already drowning in guilt and regret, surely her head would be underwater in his words. He was blaming himself for something entirely out of his control — something he didn't even properly understand.

They were two halves, then. Inflicted by the not knowing and cursed with knowledge. Martyrs in their own right, but innocents jumped into the fight before they could raise the white flag.

They kept pushing forward in hopes of ending the battle but the war surged on around them and it didn't matter how many days kept them awake, they'd always lose.

Because everyone always died.

Claudia's hand found the Doctor's then, tightening her grip on his. His eyes met hers and the depleted understanding reflected in her gaze rested quietly in his.

Perhaps there were no moves left, but she could welcome another veteran to the table. The odds were stacked against them and the game was rigged, but maybe together they could stand a chance at keeping just one person alive.

"Captain, report," Jefferson spoke. "Officer Scootori Manista, PKD, deceased. 43 K 2.1."

"She was twenty," Ida breathed out, walking to the lever and closing the ceiling doors.

Claudia's eyes closed briefly, and the Doctor's hand squeezed hers. Steadying her. Readying her. They were fighters, both of them.

They would wield a sword until their bodies were bloodless, and even then, they'd find a way to push through. He didn't see the gallows, but he could breathe through the rope.

"For how should man die better," Jefferson began softly. "Than facing fearful odds. For the ashes of his father, and the temples of his gods?"

The words were a punch in the gut to Claudia, the faces of everyone she loved in a battle against Lucifer flashing before her eyes.

Ellen, Jo, Bobby, Sam, Castiel, Scooti...

Loved ones.

Innocents.

They were all the same in the end and they'd all fought without understanding the war.

The Doctor squeezed her hand again.

He understood, even if he didn't know.

"It's stopped," Ida said quietly.

Claudia's head tilted a fraction, nearly scoffing in the irony. The drilling of the ship finished. They'd hit the destination.

"What was that?" Rose asked, walking to the Doctor and Claudia, seeking their comfort.

They dropped the other's hands and Claudia took Rose's instead, who squeezed it immediately.

Her hand was soft and gentle, innocent.

The Doctor's was stained with blood like hers, painted into their skin and etched into their fractured souls, but Rose was innocent. There was no blood on her hands. No pain in her heart.

Claudia swore she'd keep it that way.

"The drill," the Doctor responded.

"We've stopped drilling," Ida pointed out. "We've made it. Point zero."

—

Claudia stood next to Rose as the Doctor smiled down at them, wearing a space suit. She wasn't surprised — offering himself up to Lucifer on a silver platter without knowing who would be eating was exactly his style.

"Oxygen, nitro balance, gravity," he checked his suit. "It's been ages since I wore one of these."

"Orange isn't your color," Claudia smirked a bit. "Washed you out."

His smile widened as he met her gaze, before catching Rose's eye again.

"I want that spacesuit back in one piece," Rose placed a hand on his chest. "You got that?"

"Yes, sir," the Doctor winked, securing his helmet on.

"It's funny, 'cause back people back home think that space travel is gonna be all...whizzing about and teleports, anti-gravity. But it's not, is it? It's tough."

The Doctor stared down at her, light in the helmet catching his eyes. "I'll see you later."

Rose broke into a smile. "Not if I see you first." She let out a small laugh and reached her hands up to the helmet, bringing it to her lips and placing a soft kiss on the middle. Rose glanced to Claudia before pointing to Toby and then walking off in his direction.

"Take care of —"

"—I got her," Claudia cut the Doctor off with a knowing smile.

"I meant you," he looked at her softly, that heaviness in his gaze he hid with a blinding smile so obvious to her now. It was the same one in her own. "Take care of yourself, Claudia. I'll see you soon."

Claudia hesitated, knowing he wouldn't believe her, but something in her made her want to try. "It's not alien," she tried. "I'm telling you, I know Him. It's Lucifer. And I know, you'll roll your eyes and laugh it off, but it is. And...I might not make it out of this one." Her smile was sympathetic, understanding. "It's not your fault. I know what I'm walking into. I always have. And I won't let anything happen to Rose."

He didn't say anything, just reached his hands toward her, resting the helmet against her head softly. She leaned against it.

"I'll see you soon," he said again.

—

"Counting down," Zack's voice spoke over the comms. "In ten, nine, eight, seven..."

Rose stood in front of the Doctor and Ida's travelling capsule, but Claudia hung back. She met the Doctor's eyes as Jefferson closed the door. A nod between them.

Rose waved to the Doctor and he smiled, waving back.

Thirty seconds passed as they delved further into a planet destined to plan their demise, and Rose turned, catching Claudia's eyes.

She looked so helpless, so nervous.

Claudia smiled softly, closing the distance between them and swinging an arm around her shoulders, comforting her.

"Don't forget to breathe," Rose spoke through the comms. "Breathing is good."

Claudia pressed a kiss to Rose's head, smiling fondly at her words.

"Rose, stay off the comm," Zack ordered.

Rose scoffed. "No chance."

An alarm sounded and Claudia's hand fell from Rose's shoulders as she steadied herself against the computer, heart thumping in her chest.

This was it.

His move.

His great play.

"Doctor?" Rose asked through the comm. "Doctor, are you all right?"

"Ida," Zack's voice cut in. "Report to me. Doctor?"

A beat, and then. "It's alright," the Doctor's voice responded. Claudia let out a soft sigh of relief, and Rose sank against her, grinning. "We've made it. Heading out of the capsule now."

"What's it like down there?" Rose asked.

"It's hard to tell," the Doctor answered. "Some sort of cave. Cavern. It's massive."

"That's..." Ida's voice came through. "That's beautiful."

"Rose," the Doctor spoke up again. "You can tell Toby...we've found his civilization."

"Oi, Toby," Rose smiled, looking over to the fearful brunette, who was fiddling with the bracelet Claudia had given him. "Sounds like you've got plenty of work."

"Concentrate now, people," Zack ordered. "Keep on the mission. Ida, what about the power source?"

"We're close," Ida responded. "Energy signature indicates north-northwest. Are you getting pictures up there?"

"There's too much interference," Zack informed her. "We're in your hands."

"Well, we've come this far," Ida scoffed. "There's no turning back."

"Oh," the Doctor whined. Claudia smiled softly. "Did you have to? No turning back? That's almost as bad as, 'nothing can possibly go wrong' or 'this is gonna be the best Christmas Walford's ever had.'"

"Now you've triple jinxed," Claudia held down the comm, earning a laugh from Rose. "Nice going."

"Have you finished?" Ida asked in amusement.

"Yeah, finished."

"Captain, sir," Danny's voice cut in, "there's something happening with the Ood."

"What are they doing?" Zack asked.

"They're staring at me. I've told them to stop, but they won't."

Claudia snorted despite herself. It was more serious than it appeared, of course, but she couldn't deny that phrasing.

"Danny," Zack chastised, "you're a big boy, I think you can take being stared at."

"But the telepathic field, sir," Danny continued, resulting in Claudia's heavy sigh. "It's at Basic 100. I've checked. There isn't any fault. It's definitely 100."

"But that's impossible," Zack countered.

"What's Basic 100 mean?" Rose asked.

"They should be dead," Danny answered ominously.

Jefferson nodded. "Basic 100 is brain death."

"But they're safe?" Zack asked. "They're not actually moving?"

"No, sir."

"Keep watching them," Zack ordered, "and you, Jefferson, keep a guard on the Ood."

"Officer at arms," Jefferson confirmed.

"You can't fire a gun in here," Rose protested. Claudia smirked. "What if you hit a wall?"

"Firing Stock 15," Jefferson loaded his weapon. "Only impacts upon organics. Keep watch," he ordered the remaining men, glancing to the three Ood behind them. "Guard them."

"Yes, sir."

"Good shot, Winchester?" Jefferson asked Claudia. She raised an eyebrow in response, and he snorted. "'Course you are," he handed her a pistol from his waistband. "Cover me."

"You got it," Claudia nodded, despite Rose's protests.

"Is everything all right up there?" The Doctor asked.

Rose hopped on immediately. "Yeah, yeah," she spoke into the comms.

"It's fine," Zack added.

"Great," Danny pitched in.

"Believable," Claudia muttered. "Great job, guys."

"We've found something," the Doctor grabbed their attention again. "It looks like metal, some sort of steal."

Claudia's heart sank and she grabbed the communicator from Rose. "Do not open that," she told him firmly, choking up. "Doctor, you fucking trust me, you do not open that by any means. Do not do that."

Rose looked at her worriedly, and Jefferson's eyes found her face, then a hint of understanding settled there.

"It's alright, Claudia," the Doctor's voice came through.

Claudia shook her head. "No, Doctor, you do not understand. Do not open that. Please, if you've ever trusted me, I'm asking you, don't."

"The edge is covered with those symbols," Ida pointed out, making Claudia shake her head, looking up and pleading, begging God to listen to her. He owed her this, didn't he? Don't take the Doctor from her too, please.

"Trap door doesn't do it justice," Ida observed. "It's massive, Zack. About thirty feet in diameter."

"Any way of opening it?" Zack asked.

"No!" Claudia held down the communicator again. "Do not under any circumstances open that fucking door. Do you hear me? All of you. Come back, or we're all dead. Everyone. The fucking solar system, Earth, whatever. Everyone is dead if you open that door."

"Mind yourself," Zack ordered. "We're here on a mission and you're a guest."

Her breathing was labored, panicked tears in her eyes. Why did no one ever listen? Why did they all have to listen to the whispers in their mind? The push to sin? Why couldn't she ever win?

"Sir," Jefferson spoke up hesitantly. "All respect, but...she is a Winchester. Her words carry weight."

Claudia's eyes met his and a grateful smile fell to her lips. He nodded back in response.

"Be that as it may," Zack sighed. "We've got a mission. I'm sorry, Claudia, your warning's been heard, but your services aren't required."

Angrily, Claudia thrust the communicator into Rose's hand and kicked the wall, letting out a furious scream and then a half-sob, and then she broke into laughter.

"Fucking humanity," she laughed, looking to Rose's wide-eyed expression with bitter humor. "You're so fucked."

"Toby," Rose grabbed his attention after the Doctor and Zack briefly spoke. "They need to know. That lettering, does it make any sort of sense?"

Toby looked to Claudia, a guilty look in his eyes.

Oh.

Claudia nodded, understanding exactly what was happening. Lucifer wanted him but he couldn't get to him.

"It's okay," she nodded. "Let him have me."

Toby swallowed, looking over the group before shaking his head. "I'm sorry."

And then Claudia's body was no longer her own.

—

someone said recently i love cliffhangers and ofc i do it makes you all wanna come back!! hhaha okay hoppppeefffully y'all liked this! i've been listening to TTPD today so all of this is heavily inspired by that so if you get Claudia's pain through it you can thank taylor bahahah.
thank you for reading and for the patience!!! next chapter is the Satan's Pit!!