xlix. forty-nine

"No, I am not wearing another dress today!" Sophie brushed her hair out in front of the mirror, her temper towards Vertina drawing thin. She wondered if the spectral mirror would break if she threw her hairbrush at it.

"But you looked so nice yesterday," Vertina tried to cajole. She glared when Sophie gave her a pointed look that said she wouldn't budge. "For once," she added, giving up on flattery.

"If I wanted advice about fashion, I'd ask you."

"Then don't stand right in front of me! It makes me turn on!"

"Last I checked, you could click yourself off and on."

"You still activate me!"

"Fine! Maybe I should just use the bathroom mirror from now on!"

"Maybe you should!"

Sophie threw up her hands and stormed away.

In the bathroom mirror, she finished brushing out her hair and tugged at her embroidered tunic and leggings. Did she look to simple? Maybe she should—

Why was she even thinking about how she looked? It was just another Empathy meeting. She did not care about her appearance after spending seven months in mostly black and cloaks than she had before the Neverseen.

Or maybe, she thought with a snort, in that missing-memory-time-period I became a frilly princess who wore makeup every day. Wouldn't that be a thought?

She sobered up as she started thinking about the missing—no, stolen—memories that still left huge, gaping holes in her mind that she had to work around.

Taking a last swig from the mug of Cinnacreme left over from breakfast, Sophie walked out of her room.

After she stuck her tongue out in Vertina's direction one more time.

Aurahand was just as she remembered it—and she was startled to realize that its wooded, mystical grounds were starting to become as familiar to her as the old terrain of Alluveterre.

A surprised voice called out from near the entrance of Aurahand. "Sophie?"

Sophie whipped away from the trees she'd been studying. "Fitz? What are you doing out here?"

He stepped off the wall he'd been leaning against, rubbing the back of his head and flashing a grin. "Keefe told me that you guys were having another session today. I thought that I'd come out to escort you in."

Sophie gave an uneasy smile. "How very kind of you."

He tucked his hands into his pockets and started walking. "Do you remember everything that happened while you were . . . ?"

"While I was . . . ?"

Fitz cleared his throat. "With the Neverseen."

"Yes, I remember everything."

"Oh." Yes, oh indeed.

"But there's a gap in your memory from when we fought the baby trolls to when you joined the Neverseen?"

Sophie shifted uncomfortably, studying the sunlight that danced in the grooves carved into the smooth walls of the hallway they were walking through. "Pretty much. A few things that I must've subconsciously buried before they stole memories have come back, though."

"Like?"

"Like when I asked you to make me forget that I'm an Enhancer, and . . . and little bits from when the Neverseen got me and did . . . whatever they did to me to change things."

"Oh." There it was again. Then—"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

"It must've been so hard." They turned around a corner.

"I managed."

They walked in silence for a few more moments that took them up to the doorway that led to the central common room.

Fitz stopped, turning towards her. "I'm sorry because I wasn't there for you."

". . . Oh." Again. But this time, it had a different weight behind it.

Sophie made herself meet Fitz's eyes. It was something she hadn't been able to do for such a long time . . . she'd always stare at his nose or his forehead. But never his eyes.

But she met them now, she realized, with unflinching certainty.

"I thought about you almost every day that you were gone," Fitz said softly. He took a step closer. "You don't know how bad I wished every single night that I could reach out to you Telepathically, just to hear your voice again."

Sophie swallowed and looked away. "I wouldn't have wanted to hear you. I probably would've said something that would've hurt you."

Fitz breathed a laugh. "It wouldn't have mattered." Another step closer. "You know what you being gone made me realize?"

"What?" she whispered.

His face was inches from hers now. "You could say or do anything to hurt me, Sophie, but it wouldn't change anything."

She quirked an eyebrow, trying to ignore her racing heart. Stalling. "Anything . . . ?"

A hand reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "About—"

"What are you doing?" a voice demanded. Sophie and Fitz jumped apart.

When she met Keefe's eyes, they were full of anger she'd never seen before. Her breath caught. But her wasn't focused on her.

Fitz threw up his hands. "What do you mean? I wasn't doing anything."

Keefe laughed dryly. "Oh, nothing. I see." His mouth opened and then clamped shut again. He shook his head. "You know exactly what you were doing."

Fitz laughed, hostility corded in his every movement. "And what do you think you're doing just now? You'd be doing the exact same thing if you were in my position."

Keefe shook his head. "No. I wouldn't. You know why? Because I wouldn't take advantage of her missing memories and emotions like that."

Fitz's jaw twitched. "Oh, so I'm the bad guy now?"

Sophie's eyebrows jumped. This was interesting to watch.

Even if she was confused and they were talking about her like she wasn't there.

"You can't pretend that everything that happened after London was erased just because she doesn't remember it," Keefe said quietly. "Sooner or later, everything is going to come back out. And when it does, if you keep up like this, she'll hate you."

Sophie had had enough of this. "What are you guys talking about?"

Keefe's gaze slid over to hers. "Some . . . things happened after London that Fitz is pretending to ignore."

"Why are you . . . ?" Oh. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't Fitz my boyfriend?"

"Yes," Fitz said.

"No," Keefe said at the same time.

What?

Fitz glared at Keefe, and Keefe stared back, that same hard fire in his eyes as before. "I won't let you do this, man."

"Just because you want to—"

Keefe held up his hand. "I'm going to stop you right there. I don't want you to say something that you'll regret."

Fitz's eyes blazed, and Sophie knew it was time to interject. "Shouldn't we get started with our session? I can't stay too long, because I promised that I would help Grady with Verdi later." A lie, and she knew that Keefe could sense it.

He threw a grateful glance her way. "As a matter of fact, we should. I wouldn't want to keep the Foss-Boss for too long."

Fitz muttered something under his breath before stalking away, and neither Sophie or Keefe asked him to repeat it.

They settled down across from each other in two of the armchairs, and Sophie studied Keefe's face. He seemed to be thinking of something else, his crystal eyes focused on something in the distance.

He felt her looking at him after a moment and shook his head, flashing a grin. "Shall we begin?"

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