"Episode 9 - Old Friends."    

His outburst startled me, I flew back, scared. Not because of him but because it took me back in time when Jude used to do that. From the corner of my eye, I caught Gabe pulling his gun on Xavier.

"Calm down or you I will shoot. Trust me on that." He growled at Xavier.

"You want me to stay calm. CALM? MY FAMILY IS HERE." Xavier screamed.

"THEY'VE KNOWN SINCE YOU ENTERED USA." Gabe shouted back, dropping his gun to his side.

Xavier looked like he was going to have a heart attack. He was breathing heavily, vein pulsing on his forehead. I knew exactly what type of a feeling that was. The feel of panic bubbling inside his gut was clawing it's flames up and wrapping it's hands around his throat.

I felt it when I was kidnapped while the house burned behind me. I felt it every time Jude came into my room. I felt that when Mason Capone had his men dragging me out of the house to take me to Jude. I felt it when I saw Jude for the first time in many years. I felt it on that cold slab of steel when I was nearly dead.

Raggedly, I released my breath. In a poised manner, I stood, facing Xavier.

"You've been safe ever since so why would they come for you now. No one knows a part from Nathan about me and him." I pointed towards Gabe. "He personally helped us to escape."

"Now why would he do that?" He asked sarcastically.

"Because he's investigating Capone. He knew Gabe killed Mason Capone and nearly blew up a block and still helped us to get to safety." I crossed my arms over my chest. I was wearing a simple sweater dress with long socks. Xavier settled but kept the annoyed frown on his face.

"Just increase your body guards if you feel unsafe but Interpol got a hit on your faces. FBI know you're alive and living a civilian life. I think as long as you don't come back, they aren't going to touch you." Gabe explained, easing Xavier even more. "Coffee?"

Gabe didn't wait for a reply when he marched down to kitchen and started taking out cups. Xavier took out his phone, quickly typed something before joining Gabe. Sitting down on one of the stools. I took the one adjacent to him.

It took Xavier a while to calm down. It felt like he lost some of his skills since leaving the syndicate. To stay calm even with a gun pointed at you. You listen carefully and calmly to every detail of a conversation, ask questions to more more information. Now that he was calm, he was asking all the right questions, taking all the information in before acting.

If he left suddenly, the FBI would be on his tail thinking he's evading but he stays put with more guards, he has a much higher chances of laying low for longer to come up with plan of extraction was a better idea. As a mafia boss, thinking twice as fast was a must. To stay sharp in times of trouble.

After we told him about how I was kidnapped when I was 9 and had been kept by the Capone ever since. The FBI knew about it because of the DNA obtained illegally. Xavier nodded then. He knew about those. He told us, that once an FBI agent went undercover as a housemaid and tried to gather every information she could. Of course they have kill her once they found out. The FBI tried to get every type of warrants but Xavier father was clever, he made sure the body was gone.

No dead body, no open investigation. Xavier however, wasn't like that. The more we spoke, the more I realised why Xavier left. He was a good guy, that's why his men still respected him. Protected him.

I only told Xavier about the minimum about the hellish life I had but from the way he looked at me, he knew exactly what kind of a life I'd lived.

"After I was shot, Gabe took me to the vets-"

"It was the only thing I could find that was safe." Gabe defended.

"-The lady, Linda, kept me alive. I don't even know she did it all by herself. She was a nurse but she had awesome skills. Nathan helped Gabe move me to a cottage near by. Linda knew the owner and arranged it quickly before the staff started to arrive in the morning. Gabe and I stayed in the cottage for a week. Linda helped us with everything. Nathan had to leave but he did come by before we left for good."

"I'm glad you had people to help you out." Xavier nodded. "Thank you saving her. I'd known or my dad had found out, we would have gotten her the hell out of there." Gabe was taken a back his Xavier's sudden gratefulness. So was I. Tears prickled my eyes all of a sudden. Taking in a lung full of air, I sipped my coffee.

"Our families were that close?"

"Yes, I know you said you don't remember but my dad and your dad were good business partners and I remember staying as your guest house a couple of times we went to Miami. My mum doted over you." A nostalgic emotion flashed over his eyes, his hands comfortingly stroked my head like a child. "I can't believe it. I thought I had a heart attack yesterday. Your eyes matches your brothers." He dropped his arm.

"My father is alive." I shocked Xavier.

"How?" He managed to say, his blue eyes widened.

"Jude told me when I kidnapped me recently. They couldn't find my dad so shot everyone up, kept me alive as a leverage if he ever came out for revenge. Well he never did." That hurt me the most. That my own father never took revenge for me.

"I'll get Leo to find him. You don't worry about." He paused. "I know this is a stupid question but did you every try to run away before this?"

"Yes." I wasn't outraged but I was definitely annoyed.

"Of course. I'm sorry."

An awkward silence settled. The atmosphere got colder and thicker very quickly. My heart was pounding, everything was in knots. He was right. After a while, I stopped making plans to run away. I even fucking returned with Gabe when we went out. I could have ditched him and ran. He didn't know about my situation then.

"Maybe I should-"

"When I was in Jude Capone's captivity. I ran. I remember once, I just ran up to the main gate and started banging on it. But nobody opened the damn door. I kept running but could never get out. When Jude went away, Daniella, the woman Mason Capone married to make it look like I wasn't just a random girl, hanging around, she tried to get me out but she was killed in front of me. Since then, I stopped. When I stopped running, the beatings stopped and Jude wasn't there so I just wanted everything to stop. So I stopped running. Later on, it just became my home. It was the only thing I knew. I blocked out everything. My childhood before I was kidnapped. It hurt to think about it. So I let that go with time. I learned to adapt, I learned to survived after my third failed attempt to kill myself. So yes I trued to run." I looked him dead in the eye when I said the last bit with attitude.

Looking ashamed, he apologised. "I'm so sorry." His blue eyes liquidised. Clearing his throat he asked softly. "Is there anything I can do for you guys?"

"I don't know."

I felt sick. I needed to get out of the room, away from him. Too many memories assailed me at once. Getting up, I rushed inside the bedroom, closed the door with a bang. I heard some shuffling from the front room but something was bubbling up inside me. Like it did when I had a massive panic attack.

I knew I had some kind of a Stockholm Syndrome. I should have continued to make a break a for it but I stopped after a while. Why? I honestly didn't know. Maybe that's the only life I knew, only life that made sense to me. My chest tightened.

The reason why I didn't run was because I got used to that life. After Jude left and the abuse stopped, I got comfortable under their hold. They left me alone and I lived my life as I'd always known. There were months I did literally nothing than just lay around in bed and do nothing. I had no goals or hope for the future. My life wasn't in my hand and I let it become an excuse for me to not put up a fight any more. Not only that, I didn't know anyone on the outside of the gates of the Capone mansions.

Though, I sometimes practised sketching, watched moives and shows to make my self feel better and not think about my situation, I was still wasting away my life.

I remember at one point when Linda and Gabe helped me move to the little cottage by edge of the suburb, a very small part of me wanted to go back. To the comfort of the useless, lazy life I had before Jude got back to USA.

If that wasn't Stockholm Syndrome, I didn't know what was. I felt disgusted after having those thoughts, no matter how fleeting they were. I should have been happy to be out but something about that life, was much easier. If Jude never existed and Mason or Laurance Capone did kidnap me, I doubted my innocence would have brutally stolen from me.

A dull ache of that event was always at the back of my mind. I tried not to think about but as time went on, I stopped feeling anything, detaching myself from that event and many others of Jude violating me. I pretended it happened to someone else and not me.

But it was me. I was held prisoner, raped by a man twice my age when I was nine, beaten when I tried to ran and all the people in my life I was closed to pre and post to my kidnapping, were all dead.

Except for my father.

Looking at myself in the mirror, I realised what it was I had to do. I had to find him. I needed to know why he never came for me. He must have seen the family picture Mason made me and Daniella take with him. He must have recognised his daughter.

I now realised that it was a taunt. A taught to lure out my father but it didn't work.

Pain gripped my throat like a vice.

Sliding down to the floor, I sat on the plush rag and cried, holding my chest as it was about to burst out. Pain sliced up and down my body. I cried for the little girl with lost dreams, the girls who lost her favourite brother and I cried for the little box of memories of my family in my head that I refused to open. They were more painful than my attack.

Those memories gave me hope. Which was dangerous for survival. I stopped hoping and just existed. It was the only way for me to get by every day. Only way for me to not get the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach every time I thought about freedom. It was a pipe dream and now that I had it, I felt like I was wasting it.

Wasting the blessing that Gabriel provided me.

Gabriel.

I cried a little harder for him. Heaved like a wounded animal, gasping to catch a breath. He left everything for me and I can't even show him how much I love him. How much he means to me because of the dead girl inside of me. The abyss that sucked all my other emotions out of me into a black hole leaving me feeling empty inside.

He was my everything.

He was my life.

My heart jumped, feeling a flutter in my stomach. The pain ebbed and I stayed there until I got my barrings together. It was a while before I got up, washed my face to join them in the kitchen to find Xavier gone.

"How long was I gone for?" I asked. Gabriel looked sad, he knew I was crying, the puffiness of my eyes was a dead give away. I was glad that he didn't approach me and gave me some time alone. We knew when to help each other and when to give each other some space.

"Not long. He felt bad. He said he wants to give us protection and would do anything to help you."

"Well, it would help them too if they take Jude out. Then their whole empire would be in shambles and Xavier can come out of hiding and make a move on New York. Expand their empire. I mean come one. Why would they just help us? It makes sense. His second in command can take Jude out, take all the credit and then they are feared and respected."

"Xavier said they don't do anything illegal any more. The are doing complete legal constructions, clubs and security. I don't know if they will just want to kill Jude." Gabe defended.

"But if they do, Xavier can come out of hiding. Win win for both of us." I summed up.

"Okay." The pause before he said 'okay' didn't hold much confidence. Maybe I was getting way ahead of myself but I was sick of it. I was sick of hiding, waiting for something to happen Waiting for life to get better without doing anything about it.

We spent the day away in silence. The darkness outside matched my mood. We didn't spar that afternoon. He knew I wasn't in the mood for it. Truthfully, I was feeling depressed and I had been for a while. My apatite was gone and I lacked energy to do anything. All I did was sit round and read or watching shows to keep my mind of life.

"Xavier said he will send some guys over tomorrow, to check on us. They will be our body guard. He could have sent them today but he doesn't have enough men to guard his house and his two business establishment." Gabe tried to sound enthusiastic which failed to excite me. "Xavier will come by tomorrow again, figure out where we all go from here. He just texted me saying Leo knows about you and your father. He's going to do everything to find him."

I rolled my eyes.

"Elena. I know you feel like we are in a stand still but look at where we are. Would you rather in trapped in that mansion with Jude?" Even though his voice was even, laced with concerned, it hit me the wrong way. It was a low blow.

"What are you trying to say?" I spoke with no emotion. The Christmas lighting was gone, including the tree. But we kept the yellow fairy lights that stretched across the top of the wall and the neon ones in out bed room.

"That I'm trying my best here. Do you want me to do a covert operation by myself. Go to New York, get into the Mansion and take out Jude and come back without getting caught?"

"Of course not." I cried out.

"Then why are you being so cold with me? Is it me?" The insecurity I heard in his voice, pulled me out of my stupor.

"Of course not." There were wrinkles around the corners of his eyes. All of a sudden, he appeared older than he looked. My heart sank. A rueful smile touched my lips. As I leaned forward, I found myself pause when a light from outside lit up the room. The window shaped light moved at the source moved itself. A car. Someone was coming here.

Alarmed, Gabe stood, took his gun out as he made his way to the door. Peeping through the hole, he waited. I heard the engine stop, the light disappeared and the car door open and shit. Just one.

I looked at him, he motioned for my to move away from the windows. The anticipation was killing me but when Gabe looked through peep hole the second time, he visibly relaxed.

"It's Ross."

Nathan Ross. The FBI agent who helped us to escape. Feeling happy and confused at the same time, I moved towards the door as he put his gun away.

"Gabriel. It's been a while." Nathan greeted us form the porch when Gabe opened the door after checking that he was alone from the window.

"You came all this way? It must be urgent." Gabe gabe Nathan a curt nod. Nathan gave a forced laugh. There was an undercurrent of nervousness behind his strides as he climbed up the stairs.

"Hey." I welcomed him in. "How's the family?" His stride faltered but he tried to hide it by saying it was the cold.

"They are well. Just came by to see how you guys are doing." Closing the door behind him, he stepped inside but Gabe didn't move.With a frown on his face, he stared at Nathan as I remembered the days when he brought groceries for Gabe and I when we were hiding out in that cottage.

"Oh! It's so good to see you." Happy, I moved forward to hug him.

"No!" Gabe shouted from behind me but it was too late.

I gasped, my hearted drummed out of my chest.

In one swift motion, Nathan pulled me to him, turning me around to face Gabe, with a gun pressing down on my temple. The gun felt different against my temple. It wasn't made of metal.

"I'm sorry." Nathan said, his voice shook. "They have my family. I'm so sorry." Gabe hadn't drawn his gun. He didn't have the time to. He was scared, I could tell but he was mostly angry.

"We can figure this out Ross. Don't hurt her." I was breathing like a maniac, adrenalin kept pumping up and down my body making me light headed.

"No but you're too dangerous."

It happened within a second. Nathan aimed the gun at Gabe and shot.

Dead in his chest.

"NO!"