"Every little thing you do got me feeling some type of way... when you give me that thunder, you make my summer rain."

Song: It Won't Stop

Artist: Sevyn Streeter ft. Chris Brown

I didn't get any sleep the night after the party; my mind was too full with thoughts of Harry and Ben and what I was going to do about both of them. I tried and failed to separate each of them into different parts of my brain, but the thoughts insisted on blending together, each one fighting for my attention, demanding to be dealt with first. The worst part was, I couldn't even decide which problem was the most difficult.

There was Ben, who despite everything he had done to me and despite the angry sense of betrayal I felt from him, I still cared about deep down after being ingrained into me for years and years. As much as I didn't want to admit it, I had to- there was still a small part of me that missed who we had been together and wanted to maybe give him a chance to be the guy I had thought he had been. The much larger part of me, however, knew that would be pointless- he couldn't take back the things he had done and he couldn't really change. Nobody really changed.

The biggest issue I had with him at the moment was the inevitable talk I would need to have with him about what had happened. I couldn't even imagine what a mess that would be; I knew he would apologize profusely and try to sweet talk his way back into my arms, but I had to be strong. We could talk, I could maybe pretend to forgive him, maybe actually forgive him, someday, but I couldn't forget. I was afraid a weaker part of me would cave in to him and allow him to slide his way back into my life, even though that was the last thing that I wanted; too many years had gone by of him doing exactly that- messing up but talking his way out of it so easily that I forgave him instantly.

Not anymore. I refused to let him pull that again after getting away with it so many times.

Then there was Harry. This beautiful, cocky, reckless, and seemingly unfeeling boy that I knew had great potential to be extremely dangerous for me. He was a potent mixture of everything I hated, yet here I was, unfathomably drawn to him against my will and out of my control. Deep down, I knew if I let him, he would absolutely destroy me; he had that power, if I let him close enough, to shred my heart into pieces even smaller than it already was.

The fact that I already knew this was both a blessing and a curse: being aware of it made me cautious, guarded, yet not enough to stay away from him. I knew I would see him again, and I knew it would be more and more difficult to resist him with each time, but I didn't care. The overwhelming sense of impending doom settled over my heart, but I tried my best to shake it off.

If I didn't get attached, I wouldn't get hurt. Simple as that.

This was my rationale for sticking to a strictly physical relationship with him. There would be no discussion of emotions, no laughing, no playing, no actions of any kind that could potentially lead to feelings for him because I knew he would never return them. He had made that perfectly clear already.

It was days later when Ben's name flashed on phone, my eyes widening as I saw the name and panic flared through my body. I still wasn't ready to talk to him so I quickly hit ignore, restraining myself from flinging my phone across the room. I had been leaning back against my headboard late in the evening, attempting to do my homework when he called and effectively scattered any thoughts of productivity for the rest of the night.

Before I knew what I was doing, I was hitting send on the number I had just recently had the courage to save and pressing my phone to my ear, my lip dragging nervously into my mouth. I almost hung up when I realized what I was doing, sure that I looked like a lunatic calling him out of nowhere and was about to end the call when Harry's raspy voice filled my ears.

"Halle," he said in greeting, sounding surprised. I could practically hear his smirk through the phone.

"Come over," I blurted before slapping my hand over my mouth. I hadn't had any idea that was about to come out of mouth until I said it. My cheeks burned with embarrassment, sure he was going to laugh and make fun of me.

"When?" he surprised me by asking, his voice seeming to get even deeper. My heart pounded in my chest as I fidgeted on my bed, the sleeve of my sweatshirt twisting between my fingers.

"Now."

"Is your roommate home?"

"No," I answered, silently rejoicing that she was at a friend's for the night.

"Text me your address and I'll be right over," he said, his voice completely serious before hanging up without a goodbye.

I texted him where I lived and let my phone fall to the bed, realization of what I had just done seeping through my body. Had I honestly just called him and asked him to come over? And had he really just agreed so easily?

Panic, excitement, and anxiety all flooded through me at once, terrified of whatever was about to happen. I remembered my conscious decision to not get emotionally involved and forced myself to keep that in the front of my mind as I dashed around my room picking up the few dirty clothes strewn about and shoving all my dresser drawers closed.

I did a double take when I ran by my mirror, realizing with horror that he hadn't really seen me besides when I was all dressed up and ready to go out. What if he didn't like how I looked on a daily basis and left? Premature embarrassment flooded through me at the thought and I cringed. It wasn't that I looked bad on a daily basis, just not as made up as I was on the weekends. What if that's the only way he was attracted to me?

I guess I was about to find out, because I didn't have time to do anything drastic besides run my fingers through my hair.

Ten minutes of pacing through my living room later, a knock sounded at my door. A small squeak escaped my lips before I shushed myself and forced myself to relax. You called him, I reminded myself, calm down.

I managed to stop my jaw from falling as the door opened and revealed him standing on the other side, looking extremely attractive in a navy blue and red plaid shirt and black jeans with a Green Bay Packers snapback pushing his hair back. His outfit did not match in the slightest but he still managed to pull it off with ease. And, of course, his usual smirk was plastered on his face as he walked past me, letting himself in. I stared at his back as he glanced around my apartment, taking in the general details before turning to me and folding his hands in front of him.

"So," he stated simply.

"Um, hi." I almost kicked myself for thinking of nothing to say to him when he arrived. I was suddenly very nervous to bring him into my room, even though we both knew why I had called him. I needed a distraction from Ben, and he was the best form of distraction I had ever experienced. And, I couldn't deny, I wanted to see him again.

He looked amused as he watched me close the door, a bit unnerved when he didn't reply to my greeting.

"So... do you want a drink?" I asked, unsure of what to do. I had never really had a... relationship like this before so I wasn't sure how it worked. Were we just supposed run straight to my room and strip or how did it all work? I felt like an idiot. He smirked at me and ran his thumb across his lip once.

"Sure."

I nodded awkwardly and led him to the kitchen where I opened the fridge to search for something to serve him. Lord knows I needed a drink- I was quickly falling apart and losing my nerve. It was so much easier to come on to him when we had both been drinking in the sexually charged atmosphere of a party. Here in my own apartment, while I could still feel his presence sizzling through my veins, it was hard to be so brave.

"We don't have much... I think we have beer in here somewhere..." I trailed off. I jumped when I felt his hand sweep across my neck and push the hair off my skin. His lips trailed down my skin and I shivered slightly.

"I don't want a drink, Halle," he mumbled against my neck. My breathing picked up in a rush, the heat from his hand sliding across my hip mixing with the cool air surging out of the fridge.

"Are... are you sure?" I wasn't sure how I managed to speak because his thumbs were currently pushing their way past the waistband of the leggings I was wearing, the dull edge of his nails dragging across my sensitive skin.

"Yes, and I don't think you want one either," he muttered, his teeth sinking the bit of skin where my neck met my shoulder.

"I might..."

His hand slipped lower into my leggings, his long fingers pressing over my underwear into my center and setting my body on fire.

"No, you don't."

He let his finger trail over my entire core before slipping his hand beneath the last layer, his warm fingers pressing between my folds and teasing my entrance. His palm pressed down on my clit and almost caused my knees to buckle. A wet trail swept up my neck as he dragged his tongue along my skin, teeth sinking into my ear lobe once he reached the apex of his path.

"No, I don't," I repeated. Now that he had his hands on me, every ounce of nervous awkwardness seemed to vanish as it was replaced by the burning need to be with him again. My body was once again completely taken over by the fire that consumed me whenever he was around, no matter where we were. I had never experienced such a feeling with anyone else before, and that thrilled and terrified me all at once.

As soon as I admitted what he already knew, he spun me around and pushed me back into the counter, his hand never leaving contact with me. My breath pushed from my lungs when his fingers slid into me, stretching my muscles deliciously. His eyes searched mine as he watched me react, something I was quickly learning turned him on a lot because I could already feel him growing harder between us as he pushed his fingers in and out of me. A flicker of arousal hid behind his eyes as he watched his actions reflect on my face.

A little whimper escaped my lips when he curled his fingers inside me, and I bit my lip into my mouth to stifle the sound. He shifted his hips as he watched me, pushing himself tighter against me and trapping his hand between us. My hands trailed up his arms, feeling the tight muscles hidden beneath the flannel of his shirt before reaching the opening where head left the top few buttons undone. His smooth skin covering his chest, inked with the black of his tattoos, passed beneath my palms as I slid my hands down, unsnapping the buttons to reveal more of his torso to me.

His palm pressed harder against my clit as I leaned forward to let my lips kiss his skin over his collarbone where the wing tips from the swallows tattooed there rested. Every inch of his skin was smooth, whether it was blank or inked black, the tattoos long healed beneath the layers of skin. I let my palms trail down his torso, the gloriously firm muscles of his abs easily defined as I reached lower until I found his belt.

I pulled at buckle, releasing it much faster than I had the previous times I had been in this situation. My lips continued higher up his skin, my tongue slipping out against the side of his neck as my hands pushed beneath the fabric of his boxers to wrap my fingers around his length. I could feel the vein running down the length as I gripped the silky skin firmly, rolling my hand as I felt him. A quiet groan left his lips as I touched him, his neck muscles flexing beneath my lips.

I felt his hand slide up my neck before knocking his snapback off and tangling into the hair at the back of my head, pulling my lips away from his neck and bring my face in front of his. A quiet pant escaped my lips before he crashed his into me, kissing me properly for the first time since he had arrived. His lips parted mine easily before his tongue pushed into my mouth, the force of the kiss tilting my head back as he pushed his body against mine, the urgency between us seeming to triple with the kiss.

I sucked in a breath when he pulled his hand from me, sliding both of his palms down to the backs of my thighs. I caught on more quickly this time as I realized what he was going to do and jumped when he lifted me and set me on the edge of the counter. My hand released him as I wrapped my arms around his neck. As soon as he set me down, his hands slid from the backs of my thighs to my knees, pulling me even closer to the edge as he pushed his hips between my legs.

Pushing his hips into my center, I felt his hard length through the layers, a surge of desperation for him rushing through my body. My arms circled tighter around his neck, pulling his chest into mine as I leaned forward and continued to let him kiss me. His palms slid over my legs, passing briefly over my center before his fingers slid under the fabric of my leggings and pulling down to my thighs roughly, taking my thong with them. He stepped back for the shortest of seconds before pulling them completely off, suddenly leaving me sitting on the counter completely bare.

He trailed a sizzling path up my inner thigh before letting his fingers run across my opening again and push down on my clit firmly. A frustrated huff blew through my teeth as his long fingers pushed into me once more, helping relieve some of the want but not enough as my hands roughly worked to undo his jeans. His teeth tugged lightly at my lower lip when I finally succeeded and pushed his jeans down enough to reveal him to me.

My eyes widened at the sight of him for the first time in something other than a very dark room. I still couldn't believe the size, despite having slept with him twice, nearly three times, now. My hand ran up his length and circled my thumb around his tip, earning a quiet groan from him before he pulled is hand from me to reach into his back pocket.

He ripped himself away from my mouth as he pulled the condom out, sinking his teeth into the foil and ripping it open. He pushed my hand away from him before pulling it out sliding it on while I watched his face- his deep pink lips were parted as his breath came out in ragged pants and his eyebrows were furrowed low in his heated state.

His eyes flicked up to meet mine as if he could feel me watching him. The corner of his mouth pulled up into a smirk as he stepped forward again, his length sliding along my opening as he pressed his forehead into mine. I felt like my blood was boiling as his eyes burned into mine, holding my eye contact the entire time as he pushed into me slowly, the desperation we both felt suppressed into this achingly slow pace.

My lips sucked into my mouth as he sunk into me fully, my chest rising shakily as I tried to keep my breathing even. His lips parted as he bared his teeth, relishing the feeling of my walls tightening around him.

"Jesus..." he groaned, his eyes squeezing shut for a second before opening them, his head ducking to kiss me again. Our tongues tangled together as both of our bodies moved, laden with lust for each other. He pushed himself tighter into me, hands gripping my hips tightly as he held me still on the counter.

My hands tangled into his hair, elbows resting on his shoulders as I clutched him closer to me. His forehead lifted from mine as he reconnected our lips, our kiss sloppy as we both struggled to catch our breath, the way his hips rocked into me stealing any control we held over our lungs.

He drove deeper into me as his body continued to roll against me, my position on the edge of the counter making me feel risqué and dangerous and alive. I had never done something like this before, but I loved it. The spontaneity, the taboo, and Harry being here, in my apartment, were all enough to make my head spin, much less when I added in the way his body was making mine feel.

His hands slid up from my hips as he pushed into me again, sliding up my sides beneath my shirt and around to my back, the warmth from his palms searing into my skin. My back arched under his touch and the way he hit every inch inside of me, never disconnecting our lips as he leaned forward into my chest. The pads of his fingers pressed into my back as he drove himself into me again, his hands using my body as leverage to thrust harder, faster, deeper.

My head rolled back involuntarily, disconnecting our lips as he hit even deeper inside me. He took the opportunity of my exposed neck to attach his mouth to my skin, his tongue sliding out across it after nipping at it with his teeth. A delightful haze was starting to settle over my mind, clouding out every single thought except for Harry and his body and the way he was connected with me, each and every move he made adding to the blissful fog that settled over me.

Fire seared through every inch of my skin, superheating me and flushing my skin with sweat as he rocked into me. My hands released their grip on his hair to slide down his back where a thin coat of his own sweat was forming, highlighting his taut muscles and making his tattoos shine out against his skin. In that moment I was struck by how beautiful he really was; the way his muscles moved so smoothly beneath his skin and the way the tiniest of movements could have such an effect on me struck me suddenly as he moved between my legs, completely overwhelming my senses.

My hands drifted around his sides where I felt the fluid, smooth rocking of his hips against me before drifting up his stomach, the slick skin passing easily under my palms. I let out another whimper as he shifted his hips to a different angle, hitting a different spot inside of me. One of his hands rose to slide around the side of my neck, surprising me as he pulled my face to him to kiss me again, lips parting mine and letting his tongue slip easily into my mouth.

His hips were gripped in my hands as I rocked my hips to meet him, our centers colliding harshly but deliciously as he thrust into me again and again. My back was encircled in his other arm, his forearm pressing into my skin and pulling me to him while his other hand held onto my face while he kissed me.

We were so intertwined in every way I couldn't quite understand how we still managed such a desperate and even pace, but I didn't care. It didn't matter how we were moving together, only that we were.

There was a fire burning in the bit of my stomach, and I could feel that it was about to explode through the rest of my body, incinerating every nerve along the way.

"Halle," he groaned, words muffled by my lips as he kissed me again, diving his tongue deeper into my mouth as he tried to consume as much of me as he could. The pace of his hips was getting faster and faster as he pounded into me mercilessly, the lust taking over his body as he drove us closer to the edge.

My back arched even farther into him as he gave one more deep, hard thrust, shoving my orgasm over the edge and flooding it through my entire body. A loud gasp mingled with a cry fell from my mouth, and for the first time I didn't bother to quiet it; something told me Harry definitely wouldn't mind it. My body felt like it was floating as I reveled in my high, my mind surprisingly clear compared to how dazed I had felt only moments ago.

I jumped slightly as his fist slammed into the cupboard behind me, the loud rattle of the wood resonating through the kitchen as he thrust into me even harder, so close to his own end. His breath rattled through his chest as he rocked into me, the bliss from my own orgasm still flowing through me. He pulled me so tight into his chest that I thought I would suffocate as he gave one more urgent thrust, coming undone in front of me before his muscles relaxed beneath my hands, his grip on me loosening.

His mouth was still pressed into mine as he relaxed, not kissing me but breathing into me, his eyes closed tightly as he reigned himself back in. I let my hands pet through his hair gingerly, bringing him back down gently from his high. He let out a heavy breath and pulled back an inch before opening his eyes.

I gasped a little as I took in his eyes, their irises blazing green and more alive than I had ever seen them, never having really seen him come undone in the light. I had been missing out on so much, because he looked incredible; his face was flushed and sweaty and tinged pink in the cheeks but his eyes were clear and sparkling, his lips a deep, plump red, and his hair shoved haphazardly across his head. I had never seen him look so beautiful.

"Shit," he breathed, eyes flitting back and forth between mine. His hands suddenly wrapped around my face, palms heating my already warm cheeks before he leaned in and pressed one last kiss to my lips, lingering for a second before pulling back.

"So glad you called, baby," he said, smirk pulling at his lips once more.

"So glad you came over, baby," I returned, repeating his pet name for me, if you could call it that.

But in the back of my mind, I knew I was in trouble. The little details I was noticing about him were engraining themselves in my brain, and I was feeling stirrings of things I was determined not to. He was worming his way into me, I could feel it, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

"....and it won't stop."

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