"A mirror can only reflect what you look from outside; your conscience reflects what you are from within."

-Elegiac_Damsel

________

20th June

Third person's point of view:

"Anindita Auntie, who is that woman?" Agamani's voice interrupted Anindita and Satyaki's conversation. Anindita knew then that the little girl had gone inside her room while roaming about the entire house. 

Satyaki cursed under his breath about his daughter's uncontrolled behavior and went to get her from there. He did not go inside the room as it would be inappropriate and a breach of privacy. Standing at the door, he beckoned to his daughter sternly,

"Dugga! Come out of the room! Now."

Agamani shook her head defiantly, "No Papa! Come here and see. Tell me who this woman is. Please!"

Anindita sighed hearing her words. She went to where Satyaki was standing, "It is fine. Let her be. And you can go in if she insists. Trust me I have nothing to hide."

He shook his head. It would be unethical to enter a woman's room. Chivalry wasn't dead, at least in this case.

 He had a vague idea as to which 'woman' Agamani was referring to. The entire house had quite a few pictures. In the living room, he had seen a picture probably taken during her brother's wedding wherein Anindita's parents, her brother, her sister in-law and her cousin sister were posing. There were a few black and white pictures from her parents' youth and a recent picture of her nephews. Aparajita's bridal look had also been captured and framed. Strangely, none of the frames outside had Anindita's picture, neither from her past nor from her present.

Agamani started feeling annoyed when no one bothered to answer her question. She heard Anindita telling her father that it's fine for him to enter. Why wasn't he? The poor soul was obviously not old or mature enough to understand the complex rules of etiquette, decency and conduct that grown ups follow so efficiently!

Anindita entered her own room and went to where Agamani was.

"Yes sweetheart? Which woman are you talking about?" she asked her

Agamani pointed to the picture frame that was hung on the wall right above Anindita's bed. The woman smiled warmly. 

"That is my picture, baby. The woman in the frame is me." she told her gently

The girl gasped and her eyes widened. She ran to fetch her father to show him what she had just seen. Satyaki pulled his arm away from his daughter's grasp when she tried to drag him inside.

"Dugga! This is the last time I am asking you to go back to the living room. You must not enter someone's bedroom like this! What kind of shameful behavior is this? Why are you defying me?" he asked her visibly aghast

"Why are you so upset, Papa? Anindita Auntie told me to consider this my own home."

"I am not arguing with you and I am not asking you to defend your actions. I am asking you to behave like a disciplined and well mannered girl!" he replied seething

Anindita could hear the words were being exchanged between the father and daughter. She chose to not comment and proceeded to rearrange the pillows and duvet on the bed. Satyaki's action and stand was fair but what would his daughter understand anyways! It seemed highly unlikely that the kid would even know the spelling and meaning of the word 'etiquette'. 

Finally, after a few minutes of hearing the two of them, she chose to interrupt, "Agamani, I told you whose picture it is. Why are you insistent on getting the fact verified by your father?"

"I don't want to get anything verified. I just want him to see your picture and the mirror in the room. The painting is beautiful." she replied softly

Satyaki eventually gave up at his daughter's adamant stand. He looked up helplessly at Anindita who blinked reassuringly.

He entered the room not letting his gaze wonder anywhere else apart from the wall ahead. It didn't even need his daughter's intervention for him to know which picture she had been referring to. There was a frame on the wall the bed was against; right above the headrest. 

A woman's face smiled at the wardrobe against the opposite wall, in the room. The woman in the picture did not have particularly striking features. She had a heart shaped face, wavy hair, a fairly defined jaw,. Her nose wasn't sharp; it was small. Round cheeks; no high cheekbones. Her eyebrows looked natural as they were uneven. Her kohl lined eyes seemed to stare back at anyone who would pause to take a look at her face. The eyes were unchanged. Life however had. The only perfection on her face that Anindita seemed to have been blessed with were her pale pink, Cupid's bow shaped lips that were curved upwards beautifully in a dazzling and carefree smile.

When Satyaki saw Anindita's picture, the only word that came to his mind was 'beautiful'. He couldn't help but compare the two scenarios. The eyes in the picture seemed so full of life, worry-free and happy. Now, they were laden with worry, maturity and strength. The face was innocent, the current version of the woman was experienced and had been tested by life...

"Papa, look at the mirror." his daughter's voice brought Satyaki out of his thoughts

He turned to where Agamani was pointing. The mirror was a full length one, the kind everyone tends to have at home for checking on clothing. The only difference was that on this mirror, a bird was painted  on the upper right corner of the mirror. On the left corner below, a red rose was painted with one of its petals falling. 

"What are these paintings?" he wondered aloud

Anindita smiled at his query, "That is a phoenix."

"What is a phoenix, Anindita Auntie?" Agamani asked, interrupting in between

"A phoenix is a magical bird that is reborn from its ashes, baby. They burn and they die. They get reduced to ashes, but they rise and are reborn, to live again."

The little girl's expressions screamed utter confusion. Anindita cupped her little face in her hand and told her tenderly, "You are too young to understand the significance now, but I hope you always rise in life, fearlessly like a phoenix."

Agamani didn't understand the meaning, but Satyaki sure did. The phoenix was for Anindita, a reminder that she rose from the ashes and that she had little to fear. Every time she had to check on her reflection, she would be reminded that she is a phoenix. The rose however seemed so eerie on the mirror. That one falling petal... 

"What can that remind her of?" Satyaki spoke to the void in his mind.

He had no answer to the question. To him, and almost everyone around Anindita, it was all a mystery.

...

Anindita served the lunch to her guests and mother. The dining table accommodated 4 people, so it was only obvious that she wouldn't be able to sit with them. Moreover, Anurag wasn't home and it was entirely her fault. How could she eat without her brother?

"Anindita, you can sit with us. Agamani needs to be helped anyways. She is a bit of a messy eater." Satyaki spoke as he felt awkward

"Papa, I am a big girl. I can eat by myself." 

Satyaki practically rolled his eyes. He looked fed up of his daughter's extremely energetic and enthusiastic self. She had become more cheerful and free in Anindita's presence which was good, but she had a lot to learn about manners.

Anindita smiled fondly looking at the girl, "Of course you are a big girl. You can eat alone. Don't you worry Satyaki, I am fine and it's absolutely okay if she messes up."

They began lunch and after a few minutes, Apurba looked up to question her daughter, "Where is Anurag?"

"He went somewhere from the hospital, Ma." she replied, "I'll call him once."

And with that she put a call through to her brother, knowing that it was only a matter of a few minutes before her mother caught on the fact that she had argued with her son.

"Hello?" Anurag's voice spoke

Anindita sighed contentedly hearing her brother's voice. He was safe!

"Dada, where are you? I am sorry, Dada. Please come home. You haven't eaten anything since morning." she spoke urgently into the phone

Her brother was shocked to the core hearing the concern in her voice. It sounded utterly ironic to the words she had spoken at the hospital, barely a few hours ago. He gulped and replied, "I will be back home in 15 minutes. I was simply taking a walk along the Jewel of Navi Mumbai."

Anindita smiled in relief as she disconnected the call. She had a couple more calls to make, one to her sister to inform her about Agastya and another to the hospital to instruct them to not accept payment from anyone apart from herself. 

...

True to his words, Anurag came back home  15 minutes later. He was a bit taken aback at the unexpected guests at home. 

"Did you inform Aparajita?" he asked his sister while taking a seat on the sofa

"Yes. I did. I'll serve your lunch and mine once they are done and introductions are obviously in order." 

Satyaki was the first one to get done followed by Agamani. True to his words, she had actually dropped a lot of food on the table and some even on the floor. He glanced at the mess pretty annoyed. His daughter shifted guiltily and focused her gaze on the ground. 

Anindita could make out what the strange silence between father and daughter meant. She sighed helplessly and went to call her brother for lunch. 

Anurag was introduced to Satyaki, Rohini and Agamani. The little girl was too shy and conscious even to shake hands with him. She sought refuge, hiding behind her father. Anindita made a mental note to herself that the child's communication skills needed a lot of working on. Things would change once she changed her mind about her own looks.

...

Once lunch had been done with, Anurag helped Anindita with the clearing. His sister opposed strongly but he assured her that he was used to operating the dishwasher in the States.

Anindita changed into fresh clothes after taking another shower. Having had less sleep after taking a sedative, she had been on the verge of passing out quite a few times but she had to be awake;cold, head showers kept her awake. Rohini had gone to converse with Apurba and Agamani had fallen asleep on Anindita's bed. Anurag and Satyaki spoke to one another, sitting in the living room. Anindita joined the two of them after covering Agamani with a light blanket. Anurag was a bit curious to know how his sister knew these people. When they had been introduced to one another, Anindita had simply said that he was a doctor. Satyaki shortly mentioned that he had met Anindita a month ago at New York City and that she had been the Captain of the flight. He skipped adding more details because he did not want to reveal his entire life to a third person like an open book.

Anurag received a phone call from his wife and sons. It was just morning in Massachusetts, so the call had been expected. He excused himself and went outside the house so his talking doesn't disturb anyone.

Anindita took the chance to thank Satyaki, "Thank you. Rohini Auntie has really been good to Ma..."

He cut her off in between, "I am sorry... We shouldn't stay so long but that little minx fell asleep. And I am sorry for her behavior, she has been in a higher energy state today!"

Anindita laughed at his words, "12th grade Chemistry? Energy states and all! And please put a break to your thoughts. First thing, I am genuinely feeling happy that all of you are here. Rohini Auntie is the first person Ma has spoken to and opened up to in years. It is usually because she is there with Baba and because of my professional commitments and obviously her health, I am unable to take her anywhere where she can perhaps interact with more people. And Agamani is like that positive energy which made me forget everything that I might have been feeling at that moment. I don't want you to apologize for anything that she might have done today. She is like my own."

For a moment, Satyaki saw a tenderness in the woman's eyes, for his daughter. She had genuinely developed affection for the girl. He remembered the picture in the room and the paintings on the mirror.

"Who paints on a mirror?" he asked

Anindita smiled, "I am sure you have already figured out the significance of the phoenix in my life. Don't ask me about the rose, because I don't want to reveal anything in details. However, I'll simply say that it is a reminder to myself that I am strong."

He had several other questions on his mind. Anindita noticed his furrowed eyebrows and sighed, "Better to let those questions out. Your hair may turn more grey."

Satyaki chuckled lowly at her words, "Indeed! I am getting older, grey hair should be the least of all problems. Fine then. Umm... how old were you when that picture was taken?"

Anindita stiffened a bit at the mention of the picture. She was well aware that she was the one who had permitted him to enter her room, but she was quite vary as to how far into her past the questions would go. She inhaled deeply and answered his question, "I was 21 then. The picture was taken by Dada during Techfest 2011 at I.I.T. Bombay. I was hosting one of the events, so." A smile reappeared on her face as she reminisced the good memory. 

"I don't wish to pry, but may I know why you have your pictures only in your room and nowhere else?" he asked hesitantly

Anindita contemplated on what the right words would be. This wasn't a huge secret and could be shared, but somehow, it held meaning and significance for her. Would he understand?

"I put up my pictures from my past in my room with a purpose," she began. "I didn't want to let go of my emotions in front of others. I have countless memories attached with each picture that I have framed and put up. I cherish them in the privacy of my room. And every time I leave my room, I leave my past behind. Each time I cross the threshold of my room, I step into the future with my present intact, and my past preserved and safe in my room."

Satyaki nodded, "I understand your point of view.... by the way, I forgot to ask you. What exactly happened to your father? You only told me the last time I asked that he had an emergency."

"He had convulsions. I don't know what for. The emergency doctor injected him with a sedative and put him to sleep last night. They told me he will be kept in the hospital till tomorrow for observation and a C.T. Scan was conducted today."

Satyaki was thoughtful for a while. 

"Don't take this in another way, Anindita, but I think you should consult a doctor in Mumbai not here in Navi Mumbai."

At her blank expression, he continued, "It is not that the hospitals here aren't well equipped or the doctors aren't qualified enough. The doctors here have the same educational qualification as anyone in Mumbai, but the hospitals there are much more developed, renowned and see way more footfall than any hospital here. The doctors there have more experience because the number of patients there are more. Navi Mumbai is catching up well with gradual increase in population, but for now, I would suggest you to consult some doctor there."

Anindita leaned back on the backrest of the armchair, easing her body. 

"You think I haven't thought about it? I swear I have, but my schedule... I am definitely taking him to Mumbai sometime in the following week though. I have had enough. I don't know where to go though," she confessed to Satyaki.

"I can help you with that. There are several Neurologists and neurosurgeons in Mumbai and I don't think you are particularly concerned about cost at the moment," he began.

Anindita nodded in affirmation and Satyaki took that as a cue to continue, "You can consult the head of the Neurology department at Jaslok Hospital. He has good experience. There are two doctors at Hinduja too."

"Khar or Mahim?" she interrupted to know which Hinduja hospital Satyaki was talking about.

"Mahim. And many doctors with experience as well as expertise can be consulted at the Doctor House on Peddar Road. Most of these doctors who I have named have done their M.D.s from universities abroad, and I am sure they would be able to help your father."

Anindita made a mental note of the doctors' details and made up her mind to take her father for consultation the coming Tuesday. 

She exhaled aloud, her hand reaching to massage her temple, "I don't know what Ma would have done had I not been home yesterday at night. It was a stroke of luck and honestly I don't even want to imagine what the consequences would have been had I not been home."

Satyaki nodded understanding her situation. The mere thought was quite frightening. Had her mother been alone at home, she could have potentially had an anxiety attack. Not to mention the physical as well as mental stress that she would go through while helping her ailing husband.

"Thank you Satyaki for being here. My house seems lively today only because of your daughter." she spoke out after a period of silence

He smiled, "On the contrary, I should be thankful to you for tolerating Dugga. I was expecting you to complain about her behavior. It's fine Anindita! It is fine to desire support during such circumstances. We would have come sooner but I had a couple of patients lined up at the out patient department today and hence got delayed. I am simply relieved that your father is well now."

They became silent again. Satyaki's dormant mind went back to the picture on her bedroom's wall. He was reminded of his wife. The only time he had seen his wife's burnt visage was only during her last rites at Nimtala crematorium in Kolkata. Her face had been destroyed beyond recognition. She had been burnt to death much before her corpse was cremated, only to be reduced to ashes. His daughter had escaped death. Her delicate baby skin had sustained it all, but had left her with a permanent flaw. 

Since the time Satyaki had met Anindita, there had been a curiosity in him, to know how she used to look before, as was human. The question had been answered today. A beautiful woman had been forced to lose a part of herself. 

He found himself speaking even before he could realize his own words, "Anindita," 

Hearing her name, she looked up at Satyaki as he continued, "That picture... You. You... umm..."

His voice trailed off. 

"Used to look beautiful?" she offered, with a playful smile on her face

Satyaki shook his head. His gaze met Anindita's as he spoke, "You are beautiful."

His words were ironic, yet they were true. Anindita was like an incarnation of a Goddess; someone who had beauty, strength and immense power. The beauty in her could not be seen, it could only be felt and very few had the privilege of recognizing it in her.

Anindita's smile faltered for a moment when she heard Satyaki. Her lips parted slightly, in surprise. Satyaki's facial expression was dead serious. 

Something in his words made her lips curve upwards, gently easing into a vague version of the smile that had graced her 21 year old, carefree self.

...

To be continued...

PUBLISHED ON: 13th May 2020