You leaned on the balcony with elbows resting on the railing, facing the sky upwards painted with colours of the dawn.

Cold breeze brushed the rough skin of your face bringing shivers down your body as you released a long breath from lips and now gazed at the lighter in your palm.

Yoongi's lighter.

You remember the night when you both were walking down the road after having dinner at home and suddenly out of nowhere Yoongi pulled out this lighter from his jacket.
There was a faint sad smile on his face as he decided to narrate his past to you.

Few years back, he had a very bad addiction of smoking everytime when things didn't go his way or even if there was a minor problem in his life, he would instantly pull out that harmful packet of cigarette.

Yoongi's family was not an average family like anybody else.

His father was an alcholic who died in a road accident in his drunk state when Yoongi was in college.

His elder brother who was 7 years elder than him always dreamt of becoming a great dance choreographer, so he joined an entertainment company as a back-up dancer but sadly the company got into a serious scandal and didn't worked for long, shutting down in the end.

Later he still had hopes and tried all ways to fullfill his dreams but he wasn't able to fo anything for a whole year and atlast he left his dream and decided to focus on making money for treatment of their mother who was diagnosed with breast cancer.

But in the process he was so exhausted working all alone in so many jobs per day to pay for both treatment and tution fees of Yoongi during his last college year.

Yoongi did wanted to help his elder brother with the money by doing night shifts in a cafe but his brother strictly denied him and said to only focus on his studies and exams.

This somehow put a lot of guilt and pressure on Yoongi's shoulder of not able to help his brother. It was true that Yoongi was not excellent in academics, he needed to put an extra hardwork in his studies compared to other students in his class and when time came where he didn't do good in class tests and exams, he felt like a complete failure.

So in the start he only smoked to distract himself but later it turned into a regular thing, morning and evening, everyday.
And that worried his brother a lot who tried to make Yoongi understand, telling him to stop smoking and focus on his studies, try to do better rather than distracting himself.

Unfortunately, he didn't stopped.

Until the day came when their mother took her last breath and left this world.
That moment in the hospital when he saw the complete broken face of his brother who fell down on his knees and cried hard, calling himself worthless of not able to save his mother- he finally realized that it was not his brother who was worthless, it was HIM.

The one who ran away from facing the failures and chose another path that was never good to him and his family.

Just like how his father became an alcholic and died because of that addiction, he was also following the same path as him.

That day he promised to his brother and mother in heaven he would never ever smoke in life. After that, his life changed completely.

He became the topper of his college in final exams and got an opportunity to work in the higest paying hospital in United States but he only worked there for six months and returned back to Korea where he decided to work in a campaign and support his brother as well.

Life did become great for the two brothers but an unfortunate phonecall crumbled down his life into peices- His brother got into a deadly accident and lost his life.

Yoongi for almost two years forgot how to live a life, he couldn't simply move on from absence of his dear big brother that scarificed everything for him, he wanted to show his gratitude to him.

It was until one night he got a dream of his brother telling him to keep living his life to the fullest because that's what he always wanted for his little brother. He should make peace with his past and move on in life.
Since that night, he decided to listen to his brother and went to therapy for five months before joining the camp where he met you.

He has kept this lighter with himself till now showing of how worthless he was back then, that he couldn't save his mother and put all the responsibilities on his elder brother who just wanted Yoongi to be happy.
It was a harsh memory for him that he always wanted to remember till his last breath.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

You wonder what did he thought while having 'his last breath?'

Most probably regretting his decision to come here and save you.
He had a lot to do in his life, he still had so many goals to achieve and this stupid little get together ruined everything.

It ruined your life.
Yoongi's life.
Lia's life.
Hoseok's life.
Everyone.

The guilt was too much for you that you just wish to die from here, jumping right from this railing.

But the deaths and faces of your loved ones haunted you somehow. Running away so easily from the guilt is such a pathetic thing you are attempting to do so.

You literally had nothing to lose anymore, these monsters have taken everything you cherished in life, if not always but once a time. Yet it still feels like you have a responsibility upon your shoulders, a very heavy one for their deaths.

Keep living.
Rotten or shit - Just live.
No matter what.

Because the ugly true fact that now have came to your realization very late is-

You might not get out from here at all.

* * * *

Jungkook blinked opened his eyes and turned his head towards the bed to find it empty.

Sitting straight on the couch, he stretched his back and looked around the room to find it all clean and tidy which was a rare thing since he never allowed anyone to clean his room.

Sound of door being unlocked reached his ears and he quickly turned towards the bathroom to find you changed into new fresh clothes, stepping out while drying your hair with towel.

The confused man raised an eyebrow when you walked to the mirror and sat on the small stool, gazing yourself in mirror with emotionless eyes.

"I warmed up the water for you, you should take a bath."

Jungkook sweared to his life, he felt chills all over his body after hearing your calm voice as you continued drying your hair without giving a single glance at him.

"Do you want me to make anything specific for you in breakfast?"
You finally turned around and faced the still man on couch with a weak smile keeping the towel aside.

Standing on your feet, you walked towards his place and picked up the pillow that was fallen on the cold floor near his right leg but suddenly your arms were caught off in middle.

"What bullshit is this now?"
Jungkook sharply said and glared at you but you just sighed and looked straight into his irritated eyes.

"Yesterday night, you told me to behave and obey just like how I am supposed to do. That's what I am doing."

"Is this another attempt of your useless escape plan? If yes, then fucking drop it because this time, no joke, I'll kill you myself for stupid troubles." Jungkook warned hoping that you would just stop trying playing dumb tricks on them.

You just sadly smiled hearing him and gently removed his rough hand from your arms as his grip suddenly loosened at your touch.

"I really wished I had more spirit to escape from this hellhole and monsters like you in this house. But I think you finally were successful in completely breaking me apart and killing my hope."

You gulped the bitter truth down the throat and blinked multiple times to prevent tears dwelling in your eyes before speaking again, but this time your voice came out broken and painful.

"I-I think it was better for me to not act fool and should have accepted my fate long ago, atleast you monsters didn't had to kill them to stop me.
Their lives weren't have been stripped away from them to finally bring me to my senses and accept this ritual and all.
And now that I have lost everything and have nowhere to go anymore, so I guess this is where I belong. To suffer for their deaths."

Jungkook carefully observed your face trying to look for any small crack in the facade you are putting on face but there was none found.
Maybe or actually, this time you really lost the battle to fight for yourself.

"I don't believe you." But Jungkook had not a single trust on you as you stood up straight and placed the pillow nicely on the couch before speaking softly.

"No one will for now and that's fine with me. I'll just simply do whatever you people want me to do for this family."

You waited for him to say something as you looked straight into his eyes and that actually made him uncomfortable as he silently stood up and walked past by your figure, exiting the bedroom.

Taking a long deep breath, you slide your hands into the pocket of the gown tightly grasping the lighter - the only thing left for you to start living this maniac life.

You nervously served the breakfast to everyone present on the dinning table surrounded with thick tension, obviously.

Since Junwoo was also sitting among them between, everyone were trying to keep a normal face except this one person who literally had bloodthursting eyes of a killer set on your figure and every move you made.

And the little kid noticed his dad's scary behavior that he was somewhat familiar with making him lean more closer towards Jungkook away from his dad.

"Yuna, I believe I instructed you with something an hour ago. Didn't I?"

As you were about to serve breakfast on Jimin's plate, he suddenly spoke and finally removed his terrifying gaze unfortunately now throwing it towards the poor Yuna.

"Uh...I-I....I was about to-"

"Can't you speak normally without fuck-"

"Jimin, I told her not to make breakfast for you. She is not feeling well."
Mother interrupted his son who was about to curse at the poor woman in anger.

"Guess what? I ain't eating any shits she make! I'm off to work with Seokjin."
Jimin groaned louldy and pushed himself off the chair as he stood up and glared deep into your eyes while clenching his teeth which was clearly audible to everyone on the table.

He picked up his coat from the chair and walked out of the house, slamming shut the door hard.

You stood there watching the entrance door for few seconds until Jungkook nudged your elbow, bringing your focus back to everyone as you continued serving the others and finally sat down to eat yours.

As everyone ate their breakfast silently, you wondered confusingly not expecting Mother to be calm and composed towards you what you did to her yesterday night.

Your expectations of having to face punishment by mother was a big nightmare that was making you genuinely terrified and tear up in fear while preparing for breakfast.

When she came downstairs, you saw her going towards Jungkook when he called her outside in the backyard for few minutes until she came back and gave a small smile towards your figure peeking through the kitchen.

That scared you to be very honest as she then continued talking to Junwoo on the couch.

But somehow nothing has happened. Neither she has looked at you with any hatered in her eyes nor she talked rudely to you for once.

You slowly turned your head beside to look at Jungkook who was wiping Junwoo's mouth stained with the orange juice he just drank.

'Did he said something to Mother about our bedroom conversation?'
You wondered as you quickly went back to eating when he suddenly caught your gaze at him.

"I am full!! Jungkookie Uncle can you play with me in the backyard please!" Junwoo pouted and pleaded to his uncle who without any hesitance smiled and nodded his head.

"Yeah. Sure why not."
He stood up from his chair leaving his food unfinished and held Junwoo's hand before walking away but unaware to you, he gave a slight nod towards Mother before finally going out of sight.

After a few minnutes, Mother finished her meal and cleared her throat to gain attention from the people present on the table.

"Y/n dear, I wanted to say that today onwards you will have a fresh start in this family. Forget your before now and focus on growing this family. This family needs you now. Your family needs you to take care of them.
I really hope you won't break our trust and belief in you from today ownwards. Right?"
She looked at you with sweet smile that still was making you uncomfortable but you still nodded your head, smiling back at her.

"Good girl." Mother stood up from her chair aswell and left the dining table going upstairs to her room leaving you with the couple.

"Um.....Taehyung, could you please stay at home for today."
Yuna hesitantly whispered to her husband as he sighed deeply and nodded his head since she really needed to be look after because of the vomitings she had in the middle of night and early in morning aswell.

Nobody said anything the whole time as you three were done with breakfast and Yuna even if you insisted not to, she helped you pick up the utensils till kitchen and went to her bedroom to rest with Taehyung.

"Obeying is what will make me thrive in this family."
You muttered under your breath as you watch outside through the glasswindow of kitchen at the backyard where Jungkook was listening to the little kid's imaginary stories after running around to catch each other few minutes ago.

Maybe things will become better.
-Right?

~To Be Continued

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