Today's rant mentions anxiety and some kinda sad depressing stuff so if triggered by such things I suggest not to continue reading
Ok so this "rant" really isn't rant it's just more of something that always in my mind I wanted to share it somewhere, so here it is. I'm always worried my friends will always find someone better than me. Like all the time! I'm afraid even my closest friends secretly don't really like me and they talk about me to others and I'm constantly worried because I have a really close friend who we talk shit about a person behind their back so I know he is capable to talk shit so I'm super afraid he'll talk to someone of his friends he actually likes and talk about this weird, nervous kid he hangs out with because I forced a friendship upon him. I don't know it seems sorta irrational but then there is always the nagging feeling of "They don't like you, they never did, they just hang out because you never leave them alone" and it's frustrating sometimes. I don't know if anyone else has this run through their minds but if they do I'd be willing to talk in PMs if you'd like, I wouldn't be much of a help but I can at least sorta relate.